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Change Your Mindset

How To Stay Consistent When Working Towards a Goal

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Once you have a clear picture of what success will look like for you, what’s the next step? Many times, people will have the desire to reach a goal, but for whatever reason they lose motivation along the way. I’ve seen this happen to friends, family members, and myself. 

One of the best examples of getting all excited for a new goal, only to quickly stray from the path is exercise. Now, not everyone will view working out or achieving a fit physique as a success, but it serves as a good example of how easy it can be to fall short of a goal. 

Growing up, my family owned a gym. Like clockwork, every January I would witness an influx of new members. They would all be highly motivated and excited, thinking this would be the year of hitting their fitness goals. Just as routine was the slimming of gym goers come February. Then in March, all that was left were the regulars who had been going to the gym for years. This pattern continued year after year. 

So what’s this mean? Are some of us doomed to fail at certain goals? No, I don’t believe so. We can all achieve any reasonable goal we set for ourselves. The reason myself and countless others have run into problems has to do with the absence of one simple word…consistency.

“Success isn’t always about greatness. It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.” – Dwayne Johnson

How to Stay Consistent

When talking about using consistency to help you achieve a goal, I am referring to the consistent repetition of certain behaviors. A lot of the problems we run into when starting out on the journey towards a goal have to do with how big of a feat accomplishing it can seem. 

This gets worse the bigger the goal. Let’s use the exercise scenario from above as an example. If you are wanting to lose weight, your ideal body image may seem so far off that you lose the motivation to keep working. 

By focusing too much on the outcome, in this case losing the specified amount of weight, it’s easy to become overwhelmed. Here is where consistency becomes so valuable. If you have the wish to achieve a larger goal, you must employ consistent action day in and day out. 

Consistency allows you to turn your focus off the outcome of the goal and put your attention on the process that will get you there. Also, by becoming consistent, you place yourself in a better position to succeed. Now the question becomes, how do we cultivate consistency? Just because we know consistent action generates results doesn’t make it easier. Well, the answer lies in habits. Habits are actions we do on a repetitive basis. These are the essence of consistency. 

When you are working towards a goal, the best thing you can do for yourself is create habits. That way, you will take a large amount of the guesswork out of the equation. Instead of wondering what you need to do, you can just trust in your habits. To show you just how powerful habits are, I want to highlight five of the greatest benefits you can expect from Implementing habits into your own journey towards a goal.  

Five Benefits of Habits

Depending on your goal, the habits you build will vary. However, the benefits will remain constant no matter what your goal is and no matter what habits you employ. Now obviously, I am referring to good habits here. These benefits are going to be seen when you create repeatable actions that you trust will put you in the best position to accomplish your goal. 

Benefit #1: Improves Focus

With habits comes incredible focus. Questioning how to accomplish a goal is one of the most distracting activities we can take part in. Continually going back over all the paths you think will get you there and wondering which one you should take only keeps you from actually moving closer to the goal. By setting habits, you generate focused effort each day. You have set activities you do, and so you can focus on performing them to the best of your abilities. Instead of questioning what you need to do in order to achieve your goal. 

Benefit #2: Creates Priorities

Sacrifice is a common occurrence when working towards a goal. You have to be willing to put certain activities above others if you wish to succeed. How to go about setting such priorities and adhering to them is often the problem. Habits are the answer to this dilemma. When you create habits for yourself, you automatically set priorities. You have decided on the activities that will be done daily to propel you towards your goal. 

Benefit #3: Builds Trust

This goes along with the previous benefit on focus. You have to start to trust yourself when working towards a goal. Action is always better than inaction, and consistent action breeds results. So, by utilizing habits, you build trust within yourself. This trust reveals itself in two ways. First, you begin to trust in the process you’ve put in place. Thus, you help to avoid overthinking and second guessing. Second, you start to trust yourself in general. You trust that you can build habits that will help you achieve your goals. 

“I’ve also found that consistency has always been the major setback in my being able to successfully reach my goal within an ideal amount of time – the more inconsistent I was, the longer it would take for me to get that check mark on my task list.” – Eric Thomas

Benefit #4: Reduces Anxiety

One of the main problems I run into when working towards a goal is anxiety. I become anxious about how I will accomplish the goal, how long it will take, and what will happen if I fail? After reading the previous three benefits, it should be clear why habits reduce this type of anxiety. First, the focus habits generate allows you to give all your attention to the tasks you are doing. 

Second, knowing what your priorities are helps you relax and know you are doing all that you can to achieve the goal. Third, the trust in yourself and the process you’ve put forward mean you can stop feeling anxious about your goal. You trust that you have a solid plan in place which will put you in the best position to succeed. 

Benefit #5: Increases Your Odds of Success

This goes with what I said earlier regarding consistency leading to success. If you wish to achieve a goal or attain any other form of success, consistent effort must be applied. You have to keep working every day until your goal is achieved. Habits make this process automatic. Once a habit is formed, you don’t really think twice about doing it. The act has become a natural part of your life. This means you will be consistently working your way towards your goals each day. 

Final Thoughts 

Once you have defined the success you are after, it’s now time to put together a plan to get there. Knowing that consistent effort is required to achieve any goal, the question then becomes how to cultivate such consistency. 

Habits are the best way you can ensure you put in the work every day. Identify what you need to do in order to achieve your goals, and then develop the habits that will help you get there. With such consistency, the chances of you attaining success greatly increase. 

Ready To Write Down Your Goals & Reach Them? Read more blogs about reaching your goals and success on Addicted 2 Success

Eli Straw is the founder of Success Starts Within and has an M.S. in psychology. Eli's goal is to provide valuable performance psychology information to the public, and help individuals optimize their lives. If you would like to read more articles written by Eli, you can view them here. You can follow Eli on Twitter at @straw_eli. If you would like to learn more about how you can benefit from mental performance coaching, feel free to email Eli at elistraw@successstartswithin.com.

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Shift Your Mindset

10 Hidden Psychological Barriers That Are Killing Your Success

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Unconscious Mindset Patterns Blocking Your Success
Image Credit | Joel Brown

Sure, success often gets credited to hard work, talent, and a sprinkle of luck. But dive into psychology, and you’ll find sneaky mental patterns and behaviors messing with your progress.

Here are ten fascinating insights into these hidden barriers, along with some tips to kick them to the curb:

 

1. Unconscious Mental Processes and Performance

Our unconscious mind is like a backstage crew, controlling much of the show without us even knowing. It’s tricky because we can’t always tell if it’s one thought or a gang of them messing with our performance.

  • Why It Happens: Our brain is a multitasking machine, processing loads of info behind the scenes to keep us functioning. This can sometimes trip us up without us realizing it.
  • Example: Imagine prepping for a big presentation. Despite being ready, you feel super anxious. Those jitters could be old memories of past screw-ups haunting you.
  • How to Overcome It: Get into mindfulness and self-reflection. Techniques like journaling can help you spot and deal with these sneaky influences.

 

2. All or Nothing Thinking

Ever see things in black-and-white? That’s a cognitive distortion called all-or-nothing thinking. No gray areas, just extremes.

  • Why It Happens: Our brain loves to simplify stuff, even if it means being unrealistic. It’s like a shortcut that often leads to stress.
  • Example: Thinking you have to be perfect at your job or you’re a total flop. It’s all or nothing, no middle ground.
  • How to Overcome It: Challenge those extreme thoughts. Find the balance and remind yourself that effort and progress matter, even if things aren’t perfect.

 

3. Self-Limiting Beliefs

These pesky beliefs sneak in from past experiences and hold us back. They’re like invisible chains.

  • Why It Happens: Our brain likes to stick to the familiar to avoid failure. These beliefs get formed early and dig in deep.
  • Example: Bombed a math test once and now think you’re doomed to suck at math forever? That’s a self-limiting belief in action.
  • How to Overcome It: Spot these beliefs and question them. Replace them with positive affirmations and look for evidence that proves them wrong.

 

4. Habit Formation and Unconscious Behavior

We’re creatures of habit, with a lot of our actions running on autopilot.

  • Why It Happens: Our brain automates routines to save energy. Handy, but not always helpful.
  • Example: Procrastinating? That’s a habit that can tank your productivity and success.
  • How to Overcome It: Build new, positive habits. Set small, doable goals and track your progress with habit trackers.

 

5. Normative Unconscious Processes

These processes keep us stuck in our comfort zones, resisting necessary changes.

  • Why It Happens: Familiarity feels safe, so our brain resists change even when it’s good for us.
  • Example: Sticking with a job you hate because it’s familiar, even though it’s not what you want.
  • How to Overcome It: Push yourself out of your comfort zone with specific, actionable goals. Get a mentor or coach for support.

 

6. Violation of Social Norms

Going against the grain can be seen as abnormal, but sometimes it’s just what’s needed.

  • Why It Happens: Society’s unwritten rules can be strict, and breaking them can lead to judgment.
  • Example: An entrepreneur taking wild risks might seem reckless, but those risks can lead to big breakthroughs.
  • How to Overcome It: Own your unique approach and find places that value diverse perspectives. Explain your rationale to others and seek support.

 

7. Statistical Rarity and Abnormal Behavior

Just because something is rare doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Context is key.

  • Why It Happens: What’s unusual can be misunderstood, especially without considering cultural and situational factors.
  • Example: Preferring solitude might seem antisocial, but in some cultures, it’s a respected trait.
  • How to Overcome It: Respect cultural differences and find communities that appreciate your uniqueness.

 

8. Personal Distress and Behavior

Behaviors that stress you out can be markers of deeper issues, but not always.

  • Why It Happens: Distress signals can be about deeper problems or just responses to tough situations.
  • Example: Chronic stress from overworking can lead to burnout, tanking your performance and well-being.
  • How to Overcome It: Take care of yourself. Get help if you need it and practice stress management techniques like exercise and meditation.

 

9. Maladaptive Behaviors

These are survival strategies gone wrong, sticking around when they’re no longer useful.

  • Why It Happens: Behaviors that once helped you cope can become harmful if you keep using them in new situations.
  • Example: Avoiding conflict might have been useful before, but now it hinders effective communication.
  • How to Overcome It: Learn new coping strategies that fit your current situation. Practice being assertive and communicating openly.

 

10. Impact of Labels on Behavior

Labels can stick like glue, influencing how we see ourselves and how others see us.

  • Why It Happens: Labels simplify things but can reinforce negative patterns and limit potential.
  • Example: Being called “lazy” can crush your self-esteem and motivation, even if it’s not true.
  • How to Overcome It: Reject negative labels and focus on your strengths. Surround yourself with people who see your potential and support your growth.

 

Understanding these hidden psychological barriers can help you develop better strategies for success.

Recognizing and tackling these unconscious patterns can unlock your full potential and set you on a path to personal and professional growth.

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Change Your Mindset

Navigating The Depths Of Self-Love And Relationships With Stefanos Sifandos

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In the vast expanse of personal development and relational expertise, Stefanos Sifandos emerges as a beacon of transformative wisdom. With a journey spanning over two decades, Stefanos has delved into the intricacies of human psychology, relationship dynamics, and self-evolution, crafting a narrative that resonates with the collective longing for deeper connection and self-awareness. 

Self-Love Journey

From a turbulent childhood marked by violence and uncertainty, Stefanos embarked on a quest to understand human nature, pain, and potential. His empathic nature, fueled by a desire to make sense of his surroundings, led him to a career in personal development and relationship coaching. With over two decades of experience, he has helped countless individuals, from Olympic gold medalists to corporate leaders, navigate the complexities of human relationships and personal growth.

Stefanos’ journey took a pivotal turn when confronted with his own shadow — his infidelity revealed the depth of his unresolved trauma. This moment of reckoning propelled him into a transformative process of self-examination, leading to profound personal and professional growth. His ability to face his darkest fears and embrace vulnerability allowed him to develop a deeper, more authentic connection with himself and others.

Now, as a father and husband, Stefanos continues to evolve, learning from every relationship and experience. His story is a testament to the power of introspection, resilience, and unconditional love. Through his work, he inspires others to embark on their own hero’s journey, encouraging them to confront their fears, embrace their true selves, and build meaningful, lasting connections.

“Healing begins when we traverse the dark corners of our psyche, face our fears, and step into a life of radical transparency and self-acceptance.” Stefanos

Relationship Philosophy

Stefanos, a seasoned expert with over two decades in personal development, harnesses a rich tapestry of experiences to guide individuals through the complexities of relationships and self-love. Drawing from his own transformative journey, marred by childhood trauma and self-discovery, he advocates for a profound connection with one’s own pain and joy as a pathway to deeper understanding and love.

Stefanos’ work, enriched by engagements with diverse high achievers, from Olympic medalists to CEOs, underscores the universal quest for authentic connection and personal evolution. He emphasises the necessity of facing one’s shadow, fostering play and willingness in relationships, and embracing continuous growth. Stefanos’ approach is a blend of empathetic insight and practical wisdom, offering a roadmap to navigating the nuanced dance of masculine and feminine energetics and cultivating relationships that are both deeply fulfilling and spiritually enlightening.

Stefanos illuminates the path to self-love and intimacy through practices rooted in self-awareness and continual growth. With over two decades in personal development, he emphasises the power of stillness and silence, finding these moments essential for introspection and connection with oneself.

Stefanos integrates physical self-care, like cold immersion and sauna use, to maintain a balanced state of mind and body. He champions the importance of play and novelty in relationships, advocating for a playful spirit to sustain and deepen bonds with partners. His journey reveals a commitment to self-exploration and the courage to face personal shadows, fostering a safe space for intimacy to flourish. Stefanos’ narrative is a testament to the transformative power of embracing vulnerability and the continuous pursuit of self-growth, underscoring the belief that true intimacy begins with a profound connection to oneself.

“The sacred dance of giving and receiving in love is a delicate balance, where the truest form of intimacy is found not in the grand gestures, but in the quiet moments of shared vulnerability and presence.” Stefanos

Sex & Intimacy

Discover the life-altering power of non-ejaculatory orgasm, a mystical journey revealed by relationship expert Stefanos. Dive into an ancient realm where men harness their sexual vitality, transcending the fleeting pleasure of climax.

Stefanos unravels the sacred tapestry of sexual energy, guiding us to preserve our life force for profound intimacy and spiritual awakening. Embrace this transformative practice, merging the physical with the divine, and unlock a wellspring of passion, vitality, and connection. This isn’t just sex; it’s an odyssey into the heart of your erotic essence, where every moment pulses with potential and every breath is an invitation to ecstasy.

Stefanos invites you to reclaim your sexual power, not through the relentless pursuit of orgasm, but by cherishing the journey itself, crafting a legacy of love, vitality, and transcendent pleasure.

A Message To The World

If Stefanos had a global platform, his message would be succinct yet profound:

“Do the thing that you’re unwilling to do but that you know you need to do.”

This call to action embodies the essence of his teachings, urging individuals to confront their fears, embrace their truths, and embark on the journey of transformation with courage and openness.

Stefanos’ journey from a tumultuous childhood to a relationship expert underscores the profound transformation possible in the realm of human connections. His 24-year odyssey through personal and professional development, working with an array of high achievers, has equipped him with unique insights into the dynamics of relationships, especially the interplay of masculine and feminine energies.

His work is vital in today’s society, where distractions and external dissonances challenge the essence of human connection. By integrating deep psychological insights with practical experience, Stefanos guides individuals and couples toward cultivating divine unions and authentic relationships. His approach, focusing on inner work, play, and willingness, offers a blueprint for evolving relationships in the modern era. Stefanos’ narrative is not just a story of personal triumph but a beacon for those navigating the complexities of love, intimacy, and self-discovery in our rapidly changing world.

Key Takeaways For Your Self-Love And Relationship Journey

  1. Embrace Your Inner Journey: Recognize that the path to fulfilling relationships and self-love begins with confronting and healing your own traumas and shadows.
  2. Cultivate Presence and Play: Regular engagement in playful activities and mindful presence enhances intimacy and connection in relationships.
  3. Practice Non-Attachment in Love: Explore the depths of intimacy with a balanced approach to sexual expression, understanding that love and desire can exist in expansive, yet grounded ways.
  4. Be Willing and Open: Approach life and relationships with a willingness to engage in difficult conversations, embodying honesty and integrity in your interactions.
  5. Believe in Your Potential: Surround yourself with people who believe in you and support your growth, as relationships are pivotal in navigating the journey towards personal and financial fulfillment.

Connect With Stefanos Sifandos

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Change Your Mindset

The Art of Convincing: 10 Persuasion Techniques That Really Work

The knack for persuading others can act as a catalyst for change, open doors, forge alliances, and effect positive change

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how to be more persuasive

Persuasion is not as complicated as it may sound. In fact, it is something that we have been practicing since childhood. Do you remember convincing your parents to let you skip school, asking your teacher not to assign homework, or persuading your boss to give you a day off? Well, these are just small examples of what persuasion looks like. (more…)

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Personal Development

5 Key Reasons Why Perfectionist’s Procrastinate

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Procrastination Perfectionist Patterns

Hey there! I’m Joel Brown, a procrastination mindset specialist. In my world, it’s all about guiding my students through repatterning exercises to break free from the shackles that prevent them from scaling new heights in life.

Now, you might hear ‘perfectionist’ and think, “Ah, they’re destined for success!” But here’s the real deal: perfectionism is far from a superpower. It’s a sneaky villain in disguise, sapping emotional and physical strength, disrupting sleep, and fueling an endless cycle of rumination—all in the pursuit of getting everything ‘just right.’ This relentless chase is what we call the ‘Obsessive Idealist‘ procrastination type.

If you don’t know which out of. the 6 procrastination types you are then you can take this quick 3 minute procrastination type quiz on my Mindstrong Academy website.

Through my fourteen years of coaching, I’ve identified six procrastination types, but my journey started with a personal revelation—I am an Obsessive Idealist. I’ve been there, constantly toggling between creation and procrastination.

And today, I invite you to explore this path with me. If you’re nodding along, thinking, “That sounds like me; I’m a perfectionist too,” then stick around.

I’m about to shed some light on why you might be stuck in this cycle.

 

Here’s a perfectionist procrastination type video here of what I’m breaking down in this article for you:

The Obsessive Idealist: Unpacking the Perfectionist’s Paradox

First things first, make sure to take the procrastination quiz: mindstrongacademy.com/quiz to see where you stand. Now, let’s dive into the world of the Obsessive Idealist. Often labeled as high achievers or perfectionists, the core of their procrastination lies in the mind’s protective pause. It’s a shield against perceived threats, pitfalls of perfectionism, and the constant battle between the now and the future in our minds.

Here’s the paradox: what seems like a strength for high achievers can become a crippling hindrance. Obsessive Idealists are in a constant struggle to avoid failure, aiming for 100% perfection. But let’s face the truth—no one is perfect. Whether you’re an entrepreneur, athlete, or any individual striving for excellence, embracing imperfections and learning from failures are crucial steps.

 

The Traps of Being an Obsessive Idealist Procrastination Type

Analysis Paralysis: Overthinking every detail to the point of inaction is a common pitfall. It’s like trying to get everything perfect, but in reality, it backfires, stalling your progress.

The Unrealistic Standards Syndrome: Setting impossibly high goals is like chasing a mirage. It’s not just about being competitive; it can lead to unfair self-criticism and unrealistic expectations of others.

The Time Trap: Believing there’s never enough time to complete a task perfectly leads to constant postponement. This selective focus on strengths, while avoiding areas of improvement, limits your true potential.

Avoidance of Criticism: Dodging feedback hinders growth. It’s essential to learn to accept constructive criticism without internalizing it as a reinforcement of the “I’m not good enough” narrative.

The All-or-Nothing Lie: Believing that you must operate at full throttle or not at all is a dangerous misconception. Embracing the middle ground, like delegating tasks and seeking mentorship, is key to balanced success.

Embracing Imperfection: The Path to True Progress

 

In the MindStrong Academy, where I teach conquering procrastination, we focus on managing these patterns effectively. Currently, we’re offering a 7-day free trial, so don’t miss out on this opportunity to transform your mindset: MindStrongAcademy.com The Academy is more than just a course; it’s a community where you’ll find support, accountability, and tailored resources like a 31-day planner and visualization audios to realign your focus.

 

In conclusion, recognizing and managing your tendencies as an Obsessive Idealist is crucial. By addressing the deep-rooted “I’m not good enough” narrative and embracing imperfection, you can shift from a state of constant stress to one of harmonized power.

Remember, movement doesn’t always equate to progress. It’s about finding balance, embracing downtime, and allowing yourself the space to grow and learn.

I encourage you to take the quiz, join the MindStrong Academy, and start your journey towards a more balanced, successful life.

Let’s break free from the chains of perfectionism together!

 

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