Life
How to Be Less Self-Centered and More Community Focused for Fun and Profit
Do you want to know the biggest thing standing between you and success? It’s your big fat ego. It’s the focus you put on yourself, both positive and negative, that negatively affects your ability to make meaningful change and ultimately become successful.
It’s those thoughts that run around in your brain, day in and day out, telling you to focus on yourself and your own problems while leaving others to deal with their own stuff. It’s the overwhelming amount of pressure you put on yourself to perform and succeed despite all odds which is, ironically, bringing you down.
Most of us wouldn’t call ourselves self-centered, but chances are the majority of us are. The ego is what allows us to take care of ourselves, but sometimes it can become overbearing and make us forget our deeper purpose.
Here are three counter-intuitive mindset shifts you need to adopt to be happier and more successful while becoming less self-centered and more community-focused:
1. Develop self-acceptance
One of the biggest things that stands between you and success is a lack of self-acceptance.
Learn to accept yourself for you, and you will redefine what it means to be successful. This isn’t your typical “self affirmation” mumbo jumbo that so many self-help gurus talk about. I’m not suggesting you stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself how great you are. Instead, learn to be honest with yourself about your strengths and your weaknesses and then be comfortable with not having the answers.
For instance, if you are trying to start an online business and don’t know the first thing about building an eCommerce website, don’t try to “self affirm” yourself into the belief that you can build the next Amazon.com from scratch.
Instead of all that, remind yourself that, although you are a beginner, you can make a small step progressing towards your goal by using tools and resources available to you. There is no way you can go from zero to hero in an instant. It takes practice and continuous effort.
“The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.” – Mark Twain
2. Have confidence in others
Stop thinking of yourself as the lone wolf, the secretive genius, or the obsessive entrepreneur. People who are competitive and ambitious tend to look at every opportunity as one that has winners and losers. They think of the world in terms “us versus them” rather than “us AND them”.
If you want to truly tap into your potential, you need to stop trying to do everything yourself and develop meaningful relationships with others.
Having friends is an important part of finding happiness and lasting success, but there is something else which is often missing from modern day relationships.
That missing element is confidence; the ability to rely on those around you for help and guidance. It’s not enough to simply spend time with people you find interesting or engaging, you need to develop a deep sense of confidence in them. Trust your instincts and have the confidence in others to ask for help and guidance.
3. Contribute to the community
Research and anecdotal evidence from around the world suggests that one of the best ways to find lasting happiness is to find ways to contribute to your community. For the ambitious, career driven and money-minded among you, this may seem like a complete waste of time, but there is little doubt that by doing well for your community, you will ultimately do well for yourself.
Past performance from individuals and organisations that were able to tap into the collective subconscious and serve some deeper need for their communities proves that people are well-rewarded for their selfless actions.
“With faith, discipline and selfless devotion to duty, there is nothing worthwhile that you cannot achieve.” – Muhammad Ali
If you want to be happier and more successful, look at how you can contribute to your community. We are all connected in one way or another, but chances are that you have a unique perspective and insight into one or two micro communities that would greatly benefit from your help.
Remember that help can take many forms, and you don’t have to go about reinventing the wheel to contribute to the community of your choice. Look holistically at what you are good at, then take that initial step towards making a contribution.
It’s easy for me to tell you to change your mindset and implement these guidelines, but it is another thing entirely to start to do them. We live in a world that is more connected than ever before, yet somehow we continue to find ourselves drawn inward, focusing on our own goals, issues and problems.
We are in dire need of more selfless action on this planet, but that doesn’t mean you have to completely abandon your personal objectives, hopes and dreams. If you want to create a change in your life and have a greater impact on society as a whole, I heartily suggest adopting all three of these strategies.
What have you done recently do give back to others? Share with us below!
Life
9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.
Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.
Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”
But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.
Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.
Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.
1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse
As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.
Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.
Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:
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Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.
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Read quality literature in your free time.
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Nurture a strong relationship with your family.
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Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.
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Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.
The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.
2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay
You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.
If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.
3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome
Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.
You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.
The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.
4. Rejection Is Never Personal
Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.
Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.
5. Women Value Comfort and Security
Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.
Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.
Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.
6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons
A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.
Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.
Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.
7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form
Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.
If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.
8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise
Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.
Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.
Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.
9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams
One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.
That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.
Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.
Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.
Final Thoughts
The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.
Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.
Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.
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The Secret Daily Routines Behind History’s Most Brilliant Thinkers
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