Connect with us

Life

7 Simple Steps to Change Your Life With Positive Thinking

Published

on

positive thinking

Positive thinking is important for your achievements. Many people underplay this important tool because they say, ‘why think positive when you have lost so many opportunities?’ or ‘can positive thinking change what had happened in the past?’. I agree with many positive thinking critics because most of their statements have tints of truth.

Before you continue reading this article I want you to spare a minute to think hard. Think of something very pursuant or a magnificent achievement that started with negative thinking. The answer is probably not many or none at all.

Think of the Electric bell, Telephone, Helicopter, Airplanes, or beautiful artwork like Mona Lisa, or Masterpiece novels like Harry potter. The Authors were able to achieve this because they had faith in their works despite much opposition they had. The Wright brothers, or many rejection letters that poured on Harry Potter’s table were not daunted. That is positive thinking. Positive thinking won’t change your past but will improve your future.

Here are few tips to change the quality of our lives with positive thinking:

1. Accepting what we can’t change

Many of us like dwelling on our past; failed marriages, lost opportunities, disappointments etc. Just like me, many of us have lost opportunities in the past. Will pondering on them drive us back to the past? NO. My friend this is not science fiction. Since we can only dwell on our past and we can’t change it, why can’t we plan for our future?  

I want you to take this short exercise before the next step. I want you to write down everything that is bad about your past, but instead of pondering on them, look at them very well for the last time cancel them so that you can’t see them again, and write down your future plans on the next page.

“Accept the challenges so that you can feel the exhilaration of victory.” – George S. Patton

2. Stop blaming external factors

Some people like to blame external factors for their woes. Some will say ‘if not because the economy is bad, I will start a business’ or, ‘I would love to write a book, but I’m too busy’ The human skin is always ruined to make excuses. Many of the people we mentioned at the beginning had excuses.

Wright brothers would have blamed discouragement for their woes. J.K. Rowling would have blamed her woes on bad luck but they kept on pushing until they had what they were looking for. If you want to get what you want today you won’t blame external factors on your woes.

3. The power of determination

Determination is one of the most important tools to achievement in life. One of the best books, ‘Think and Grow Rich’, stressed the importance of determination. One of my favorite quotes is  “if you really want it you’ll get it.” The reason you’re not pushing towards your goal is because it’s not really important to you. If it’s important to you, you’ll get it.

4. Stop spending time with negative thinkers

You might have observed that many people who failed to overcome an obstacle are used to bad stories. A woman who is divorced can tell you how bad men are for the next twenty four hours. Stop associating with negative thinkers. Instead of floundering around with negative thinkers find mentors. Mentors are people who already made it to where you are wanting to be. My mentors are Benjamin Franklin and Leonardo Da Vinci. Thinking and reading about them keeps me away from negative thinkers.

5. Stop dwelling on the bad side of life

Some people read news, and every time they read they become afraid-as if the bad thing in this life is happening to them. Especially these days that the media doesn’t have any good news to offer. I’m not saying we should not have sympathy, but we should not spend a whole day on the bad side of life. It is interesting to know that for every bad thing many good things are also happening.

6. Shun fear

Fear, as many used to define it as FALSE Expression Appearing Real is killing dreams. Fear of the future, fear of anything can kill your dreams. Some people have set limitations because of fear. I wonder why some people will read a book and say ‘I wish I can write a book but I can’t be as good as this author’. Many people use to immortalize top achievers as if they’re not human beings. I want you to mention a top performer in any field that fell down from Mars. You may not find one. Since they are humans like us, we can soar even higher than them.

“If you want to conquer fear, don’t sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” – Dale Carnegie

7. Positive thinking without action is nothing

Thinking about plans and a glorious future without action is daydreaming and it is NEGATIVE thinking. POSITIVE thinking should always be followed by action. If you want to write that book, start writing the first chapter or synopsis of action. If you want to get help, go to necessary authorities. If you want to improve your marriage go and do it now. If you want to start a business, you can’t have a better time to start. Take action now for it is the most important thing to do.

Did positive thinking help you in any way in the past? Or, how are you planning to change your life with positive thinking? Please comment below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

John Olah is a freelance writer who writes in almost every niche, he has written for many clients all over the world with the approval rating of 100%. He is a business strategist and an entrepreneur whose aim to make our world a better place. You can contact him via email at Esantobi8@gmail.com.

Advertisement
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life

The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

Published

on

Image Credit: Canva

Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Published

on

Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
Continue Reading

Trending