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6 Reasons to Celebrate Other People’s Success

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Celebration!

What a phony smile… Why do people want him? How has he accomplished anything? It’s ME they need. I’m the one who should be successful, not him. What a joke.” This was my inner dialogue when I heard about other people’s success. Like a prima donna, I seethed with jealousy and couldn’t stand to hear about people doing better than me.

But all the hating got me nowhere. So I thought about who I was really mad at…it wasn’t the successful people I raged at. When I got more serious about succeeding, I channeled that useless envy into accepting myself.

I practiced self-acceptance with a journal, through affirmations, and by encouraging myself—especially when I failed. Then something weird happened. I started feeling happy for other people’s success. Without a hint of irony, I congratulated people on their hard work, and I applauded their success with my best wishes. It felt good. I felt more successful doing it.

“Embrace your uniqueness. Time is much too short to be living someone else’s life.” – Kobi Yamada

My writing career caught fire at the same time. I was published on sites that I’d only dreamt of, and whose authors I had cussed for doing things that the egotistical me still hadn’t. Congratulating others started a positive feedback loop. The more I accepted myself, the more I celebrated other people’s success and the more I celebrated their success, the more success I achieved. Now that I look back, I could’ve hacked my growth curve by celebrating others’ success as a daily ritual.

Here are six reasons why you should start applauding successful entrepreneurs today:

1. It conditions you for your own success

Feeling good for someone else’s success helps you generate the same feelings you need for your own accomplishments. So put yourself in the other’s shoes. Revel in their accomplishments; think of all the hard work that went into it. Celebrate their success and know that soon you’ll experience the same thing for yourself. Apply the good feelings to your visions for a brighter future.

2. You’ll transcend yourself

Everyone knows that to actually succeed, you need to be part of something bigger. But most people are kept from that bigger something by wanting all the focus for themselves. it’s an ego issue.

Through celebrating others, you’ll practice the selflessness it takes to let go of your tiny shell and leap into the ocean of success that comes through serving others. Cheer your fellow entrepreneurs. Feel their success. Let go of your want for recognition and accept that you’ll get it when you help enough other people.

3. It generates abundance

When people think food is scarce, they don’t want to share. When people think success is scarce, they’ll soon eat themselves up with envy than dish out some praise. But that issue of scarcity can be fixed in an instant.

Create your own abundance by praising your successful compadres. Be excited for their achievements. Even if it hurts, celebrate and appreciate the success of your peers. Then do it again and again. Do it until you realize that there is and always has been enough success to go around.

Don’t worry if you’re not in the same room, or even the same network, just feel gratitude for their accomplishments. Be excited for them. Practice those feelings for other people enough and you’ll step into your vision of success without having realized it—as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

“Not what we have But what we enjoy, constitutes our abundance” – Epicurus

4. It kills the ego

Egotism is the root of all business failures. Some people blow their heads up so big that they experience a temporary bubble of success, but the bubble always pops. If you want the real deal, you need to destroy the ego. Kill it with kindness.

You can fast-track ego-annihilation by focusing on the good done by others. When you feel a twinge of neediness, or jealousy, or desolation, just zoom out of “poor-me mode” and force your focus onto something useful—like other people’s accomplishment.

Feel good about and for them. Then transfer those feelings to your own visions of success, to the accomplishments you know you’ll reach.

5. You’ll extend your network

People like people who make them feel good. That’s how networks are grown. You can expand your own by spending time each day feeling good for other people and sharing your praise for their work. It’s as simple as this: “Hey, I’m super excited for your success—it must feel great. Thanks for motivating me to strive for more, and to be bigger.”

Follow their articles. Join the conversation, and add value whenever you can. This makes people feel good about your presence, which will lead to more connections, more invites, and more opportunities to do cool stuff with the people who are making things happen.

6. It helps you accept yourself

I learned how to praise others by an intense self-acceptance practice. But it works both ways. Kind of like smiling can make you feel happy. If you make a ritual of praising others, it’s only a matter of time before you’re accepting and praising yourself, and doing it enough to take your success to the next level.

This list could go on and on, but is there a single reason to withhold your enthusiasm for other’s achievements? I haven’t found one. So make the celebration of other people’s achievements a daily ritual. Your success and happiness depend on it.

Have you start celebrating others success? Have you seen a difference in your life because of it? Leave your thoughts below!
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Life

The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

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Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

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How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.

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It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

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Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

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People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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