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5 Phobias That Are Stifling Your True Potential

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Could there be a reason your idea is still on a back burner? Could it be the same reason we stay at a job until redundancy strikes and forces us into a state of panic?  

The same reason many concepts do not grow as they could over the years. The feeling that is holding many people back from fulfilling their real potential, could be affecting you too.

What could it be? It is a phobia; that emotion that has the habit of popping up when we want to step out of our comfort zone.  

Here are five phobias that are hurting your true potential:

1The fear of failure

A common phobia, I am sure even the most successful people have the same feeling at one point in their lives.

It is natural to want to stay in your comfort zone where everything is almost predictable. However, to be successful you have to push outside of this zone and stretch your faith into the unknown.

The only way you can get over the fear of failure is to face the task squarely in the face and just do it. Watch a baby take his first step, isn’t it amazing how he totters along with faith in his unsteady steps until he finally gets it right? It should be the same thing with you too. You may not get it right the first time, but you will learn valuable lessons along the way that will help you get it right eventually.

Start with baby steps so you can comfortably step into your stretch zone. The best way to conquer your fear of failure is to take action.

“Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead-end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” – Denis Waitley

2. The stretch zone phobia

A comfortable position is great and at certain times in our lives, we all crave that warm, cosy feeling knowing that everything is well with the world. Nevertheless, those who excel in their chosen field understand that nothing grows in the comfort zone.

To reach your true potential and do something phenomenal, will require some commitment and a stretch from you. You may have to stay up late, talk to people you prefer not to, make some phone calls or network with strangers to push your idea forward. Seems daunting, yes, but I promise it is always worth it.

 

3. Time phobia

Are you always afraid of time running out, thinking you will never have enough to do all the things you want to do in life?

The problem is usually not lack of time but a lack of scheduled priorities. At any given time in our lives, every task will fight for dominance – this includes sleeping. When we shift our chores around like musical chairs, we end up losing focus and put ourselves under undue pressure.  

Once you accept that you are in control of your time, your schedule becomes yours to manage. You stop allowing people to dump their excesses on you and start taking control of your day.

The choice of what you do every day is yours. If you want to use a portion of your time to grow your passion, passive income streams or business, so be it. Make your schedule work for you and not against you.

 

4. Fear of people’s thoughts

It happens to confident people too, so you are no exception – concern for the thought of what people might think if you take that step. I came to the realization many years ago that there will always be people standing with you and some against you. You cannot allow other people’s thoughts to determine your destiny.

Find clarity for what you want to do with your life before you take action. You can achieve this through coaching, support or talking to friends and family. The ultimate decision of what you want to do must come from your intuition.

 

5. Fear of the future

The future will come to us whether we want it or not. What you should be thinking about is what you want to be doing when it comes. If fear is holding you back from taking a step into a better future, adopt a realistic view of what the delay is costing you now and what it might cost in the future.

“Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live.” – Dorothy Thompson

The first step to overcoming your phobias is a mindset shift. A change in your mindset will make a remarkable difference to the goals you will achieve in life. If one or more of these phobias plague your life on a consistent basis, it is time to take charge and boot them out.

If you need counselling or coaching, by all means take the opportunity. Take one-step at a time and leave no room for fear to take control of your life.

What is your phobia? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below!

Temi Koleowo is passionate about helping individuals, and businesses alike discover their superpowers (aka their inner strengths and uniqueness) and turn them into viable products and services. She is the author of the book many are raving about ‘Package Your Passion’ – which helps people turn their limitless potential into amazing opportunities. Temi maximizes her strengths by helping people discover, develop and deploy their passion and talent to live their best lives everyday by doing what they love.  You can find out more about her and the program at www.packagemypassion.co.uk.

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4 Comments

4 Comments

  1. Temi Koleowo

    Feb 16, 2016 at 11:12 am

    Great summation Lawrence.

  2. Temi

    Feb 11, 2016 at 5:31 pm

    Well stated Lawrence, living in fear is not the way to live.

  3. Lawrence Berry

    Feb 10, 2016 at 12:49 am

    It can be tough sometimes to face your fear, but a wise man once said that everything we ever wanted lies on the other side of fear. Alot of people are not living their dreams because they are living their fears, and that is not the way to live. The fear of failure is something that haunts all of us, and it can destroy you, or it can push you to greatness. I think all of these fears can hinder someone’s success.

    • Tim Denning

      Feb 13, 2016 at 1:07 am

      One of my fav quotes Lawrence. Thanks for reminding me of it.

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It’s pretty annoying isn’t it? All those great and accomplished people telling you that FAILURE is a necessity on your way to success. Yeah, that’s easy for them to say; they’re already ‘on the other side’! You on the other hand, are still struggling all day everyday to get your business lifted off the ground and are really not that sure if you’re indeed going to make it.

There’s that little voice in your head that keeps telling you that you don’t have the stuff to make it all happen. Not now and not ever. You feel like a failure…it’s holding you back and you don’t know how to deal with it. Well you could do yourself a favor and start dealing with it by doing the following things:

1. Stop Denying You Feel Like A Failure

Telling yourself things are going great when they’re not is one of the biggest, though most useless, coping mechanisms human beings deploy in rough times. Common denial signals among entrepreneurs: trying to regain more control by working even more hours and on the other side compensating this by letting go of all this control by partying and drinking way too hard.

What you’re doing is denying yourself the opportunity to actually feel what’s going on and acknowledge the problem; that both you and your business are in a bad place. Without acknowledging it, it’ll be pretty difficult to actually STOP feeling it. And remember, just because you feel like a failure, this does not mean that you indeed ARE a failure!

2. Stop Making It Bigger Than it Really Is

This is one of those other ‘fun’ things human beings do; we blow things way out of proportion in our heads! In business, when you lose that big client you’ve been working on for weeks, it feels like it’s the end of the world. You start doubting yourself, your strategy, your entire business model right up to the point where you barely sleep because you’re working on pivoting the whole thing.

But what if that customer simply didn’t have the money to go for your service anyway? Or what if they just decided to go for someone who is cheaper but who offers less quality? Does that mean there’s something wrong with YOU? Or that this was the ONLY customer out there and that you’re now doomed forever?

Of course not, it simply means that THIS CUSTOMER wasn’t a match. It’s a bit like dating actually…So if you take this into consideration, could it be that you just feel like a failure instead of really not succeeding in that what you want to at this point in time?

3. Stop Thinking You’re The Only One Who Feels Like This

You’re not! With the possible exception of the true sociopaths, that feeling you’re feeling is very normal to EVERYONE. It might not seem like it on the outside – because people don’t like to acknowledge this remember – but I can guarantee you that it’s true. But unlike 99% of the world’s population, YOU’RE not going to let this feeling stop you in your tracks. Are you?

4. Stop Thinking You’re Supposed To Be Superhuman

In fact, it’s very likely that you’re already doing, learning and succeeding at WAY more than most other people are. But for entrepreneurs, somehow, that never seems to be enough. You don’t just want to be successful after a few years of hard work (which is normal). You want to be successful after only a few months. Because you’re special…or at least you think you are…

Well, here’s the truth: you ARE special! But…it’s just not very likely that you’re one of those – very very rare – entrepreneurial superstars that – seemingly – just added some hot water and got instant business success as a result.

5. Stop Being So Incredibly Stubborn

Entrepreneurs are stubborn…almost by default. It’s what makes them push forward in the hardest of times. But…if you’re not doing the right things right you might just be hammering a square peg through a round hole. Which will only add to that frustrated feeling you’re already having. So why not stop being so stubborn for a moment, stop hammering away on that what obviously is not working and ask for help?

No matter who you ask – a business mentor or coach, a befriended entrepreneur – someone with a neutral perspective on you and our business will be very likely to see what’s going on with a lot more clarity than you can and can guide you to a place that will feel a whole lot more comfortable.

6. Stop Being Afraid Of Failure

I know, I know, you’ve heard this a million times before and you wouldn’t be in this pickle if you could do this. Right? I’m right there with ya!

But, if you get really rational about it, what’s the worst that could happen?

  • You might have to get a ‘real’ job for a while and start over on the side;
  • You might not be able to afford your rent anymore…but with Airbnb on the 1 hand and couchsurfing on the other, you should be able to work it out somehow;
  • You’ll have all the more experience to start over a whole lot faster;
  • You’ll be no less respected by anyone because it’s clear you gave it your all;
  • In a few years, when you’re an established and supersuccessful entrepreneur you’ll also have a cool failure story to tell;
  • None of your limbs will fall off;

Now that’s not too bad for a plan B is it? Failure is such a negative word. And the associated feeling is terrible and numbing. But really…how is giving it your all and not succeeding really the same as failing? Shouldn’t the definition of failure not be along the lines of ‘not even trying’ or ‘giving up when it gets hard’?

In other words: stop beating yourself up over this!

There’s really no need to feel like a failure at all because you’re sticking your neck out, you’re trying to make a difference and you’re still moving upward on that treacherous entrepreneurial mountain.

And that…is what success REALLY is.

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Quotes To Live By:

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

“If you don’t try at anything, you can’t fail… it takes back bone to lead the life you want” – Richard Yates

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas A. Edison

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie

“Success is stumbling form failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm” – Winston Churchill

“Don’t let success go to your head and failure to your heart” – Will Smith

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