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10 Principles to Harness Your Self-Confidence That Lives Within You

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Self-confidence is an evolutionary journey. It is the accumulation of experiences, new learning and fearlessness. Sometimes you may possess it and not even realize. Being conscious of your own powers and abilities is what allows you to think, speak and act purposefully. You tap into an inner strength and embody courage to succeed. Self-confidence is linked with success as you have more energy and your inspiration comes from within.

No one is immune to slip into bouts of doubt, insecurity and uncertainty, however, it is your choice if you allow it to dictate the conditions of your life. Insecurity plagues people consciously and unconsciously. While the fearful will agonize over decisions and make the safe choices, the confident leader will make the decision quickly and change their mind slowly.

Every time you express your opinion to the world, each time your stand for something you want or every time you take a risk to expand your unfamiliar zone, you are building your own reservoir of confidence which only you can access at any time you choose. It’s yours, you own it.

Self-confidence is a fundamental quality to leaders and it is where leadership grows. To build confidence, you must practice confidence.

Let’s embark on a quest for self-confidence and embody 10 principles to harness your self-confidence that lives within you:

1. Ultimate you

Your essence as a leader is independent of the opinion of others, feels above and beneath no one and is fearless of all challenges. When you embrace your true self, you know within that you can handle whatever happens in life with compassion and certainty as your self-worth is not tied to what others think of you. You purposefully step into being fearless and courageous in all things.

2. True masters, always the student

Allow yourself to be an avid learner. Acknowledge that it is okay not to be perfect, expand your own limitations and unfamiliar zones to step into starting something new. Lifelong learning separates those who will continue to rise in the fields from those who are content to just float along.

There is a concept in Zen Buddhism called “shoshin” or “beginner’s mind”, which means being open to learning more no matter what level of success you have achieved. When you approach your work with vigor, you work knowing there is always something new to learn.

3. Execution is the game

The ‘what if’ loop permeates the minds of many. Worrying, overthinking and anxiety create a state of paralysis in which you fail to act. When you do act, you own the consequences. The accomplishments or downfalls are the greatest feedback, gifts and experiences. When you detach from the outcome, execution is the decision where your confidence will grow.

4. Getting in the trenches

Building a surplus of experiences only results from putting yourself out there and taking risks. A disciplined practice and a commitment to growth enhances your self-confidence because “repetition is the mother of all skill” no matter the endeavor.

5. Practice presence

When you tap into your true self, you experience self confidence as your ground state. Through the practice of being present in the moment, the voices of doubt, indecision and fear soften to distant whispers. From this state, you tap into your internal resources as a platform for achievement and fulfilment.

Practicing mindfulness can have significant benefits for your physical and psychological well being. Notice your breath flowing and bring awareness to your other sensations – what you see, what you hear, what you smell, and taste.

Visualize your confidence in your mind’s eye by seeing yourself speaking on a stage or doing the activity for which you require more confidence. Allow the feelings of comfortable presence to pervade your body and mind.

“Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.” – Mother Teresa

6. Say ‘no’

Confident people know that saying ‘no’ is healthy. They own their ‘no’ with confidence as it is in alignment with who they are, their values and what they stand for. Saying ‘no’ to new commitments honors your existing priorities.

7. Knowledge breeds confidence

Tapping into mentorship boosts confidence. Accessing the knowledge, experience and wisdom of a person who has walked the path less travelled allows you to focus your energy more effectively and efficiently. Successful CEO’s continue to study from the masters. Whether it’s attending conferences, watching TED talks or engaging a mentor. By studying the best in your field, you can up your game.

8. What would Kanye do?

Confident people are not afraid to stretch their limits and set the bar high. Kanye West claiming to run for President in the 2024 elections should not be taken lightly as he strongly holds his belief in his own ability to succeed. Setting the bar too low or not acting will slowly but surely allow self-doubt to creep back in. Every time you find yourself holding yourself back, just ask yourself, ‘what would Kanye do?”

“You are now watching the greatest living rockstar on the planet.” – Kanye West

9. Deliberate practice

World-class titans don’t ever rest. Deliberate practice trumps natural talent. If you are unsure about your ability to do something, start by trying on the skills in a safe setting. Preparation builds confidence over time. Getting out of your own way by asking for help is confidence in learning. When you tap into your own value and how you can add value to others, confidence is no longer about self-promotion. You invest your energy and your being in how you can add value to another human being. It’s no longer about you.

10. Get your power pose on

Wonder Woman power posing has been all the rage over the last 5 years. Amy Cuddy, Harvard Psychologist, did a TED Talk and discussed how your body language governs how you think and feel about youself. For instance, commanding a powerful stance can make you feel more powerful. When you keep your body relaxed and open, your confidence starts to rise. A further academic paper published in 2018 by Cuddy, provided ample evidence that adopting an expansive posture makes people feel more powerful. Before your next interview, strike a power pose.

Confidence turns thought to action. Confidence is a building block in an impactful career and embracing it will take you places you never thought possible.

How do you increase your self-confidence? Let us know in the comments below?

Angela Kambouris used to work with high risk kids in the streets of Melbourne, now she has her own consultancy business and writes for large publications. As a leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma, she has built a high-level career as an executive and transitioned into a business owner. She has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business. Love to travel, experience difference cultures and mastermind with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world. Connect with her through her website http://angelakambouris.com/ or through her Facebook.

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2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. Cami

    May 16, 2018 at 2:39 pm

    I have noticed that every little decision you make towards becoming a better you is important. Two years ago I was in a bad place until I started soaking up every positive self help thing i could. Eventually my mind started replying to negative things with a positive and now i’m able to push myself forward a little more but you have to invest in yourself. Self confidence and happiness are constant decisions and you have to start somewhere.

  2. Jan Becker

    May 12, 2018 at 3:58 pm

    Taking action always leads me away from my fears. If I take action towards small goals I get a small boost of confidence and if I take action towards my biggest goals I get a big boost!

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Life

Don’t Want To Feel Like A Failure Anymore? Stop Doing These 6 Things

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It’s pretty annoying isn’t it? All those great and accomplished people telling you that FAILURE is a necessity on your way to success. Yeah, that’s easy for them to say; they’re already ‘on the other side’! You on the other hand, are still struggling all day everyday to get your business lifted off the ground and are really not that sure if you’re indeed going to make it.

There’s that little voice in your head that keeps telling you that you don’t have the stuff to make it all happen. Not now and not ever. You feel like a failure…it’s holding you back and you don’t know how to deal with it. Well you could do yourself a favor and start dealing with it by doing the following things:

1. Stop Denying You Feel Like A Failure

Telling yourself things are going great when they’re not is one of the biggest, though most useless, coping mechanisms human beings deploy in rough times. Common denial signals among entrepreneurs: trying to regain more control by working even more hours and on the other side compensating this by letting go of all this control by partying and drinking way too hard.

What you’re doing is denying yourself the opportunity to actually feel what’s going on and acknowledge the problem; that both you and your business are in a bad place. Without acknowledging it, it’ll be pretty difficult to actually STOP feeling it. And remember, just because you feel like a failure, this does not mean that you indeed ARE a failure!

2. Stop Making It Bigger Than it Really Is

This is one of those other ‘fun’ things human beings do; we blow things way out of proportion in our heads! In business, when you lose that big client you’ve been working on for weeks, it feels like it’s the end of the world. You start doubting yourself, your strategy, your entire business model right up to the point where you barely sleep because you’re working on pivoting the whole thing.

But what if that customer simply didn’t have the money to go for your service anyway? Or what if they just decided to go for someone who is cheaper but who offers less quality? Does that mean there’s something wrong with YOU? Or that this was the ONLY customer out there and that you’re now doomed forever?

Of course not, it simply means that THIS CUSTOMER wasn’t a match. It’s a bit like dating actually…So if you take this into consideration, could it be that you just feel like a failure instead of really not succeeding in that what you want to at this point in time?

3. Stop Thinking You’re The Only One Who Feels Like This

You’re not! With the possible exception of the true sociopaths, that feeling you’re feeling is very normal to EVERYONE. It might not seem like it on the outside – because people don’t like to acknowledge this remember – but I can guarantee you that it’s true. But unlike 99% of the world’s population, YOU’RE not going to let this feeling stop you in your tracks. Are you?

4. Stop Thinking You’re Supposed To Be Superhuman

In fact, it’s very likely that you’re already doing, learning and succeeding at WAY more than most other people are. But for entrepreneurs, somehow, that never seems to be enough. You don’t just want to be successful after a few years of hard work (which is normal). You want to be successful after only a few months. Because you’re special…or at least you think you are…

Well, here’s the truth: you ARE special! But…it’s just not very likely that you’re one of those – very very rare – entrepreneurial superstars that – seemingly – just added some hot water and got instant business success as a result.

5. Stop Being So Incredibly Stubborn

Entrepreneurs are stubborn…almost by default. It’s what makes them push forward in the hardest of times. But…if you’re not doing the right things right you might just be hammering a square peg through a round hole. Which will only add to that frustrated feeling you’re already having. So why not stop being so stubborn for a moment, stop hammering away on that what obviously is not working and ask for help?

No matter who you ask – a business mentor or coach, a befriended entrepreneur – someone with a neutral perspective on you and our business will be very likely to see what’s going on with a lot more clarity than you can and can guide you to a place that will feel a whole lot more comfortable.

6. Stop Being Afraid Of Failure

I know, I know, you’ve heard this a million times before and you wouldn’t be in this pickle if you could do this. Right? I’m right there with ya!

But, if you get really rational about it, what’s the worst that could happen?

  • You might have to get a ‘real’ job for a while and start over on the side;
  • You might not be able to afford your rent anymore…but with Airbnb on the 1 hand and couchsurfing on the other, you should be able to work it out somehow;
  • You’ll have all the more experience to start over a whole lot faster;
  • You’ll be no less respected by anyone because it’s clear you gave it your all;
  • In a few years, when you’re an established and supersuccessful entrepreneur you’ll also have a cool failure story to tell;
  • None of your limbs will fall off;

Now that’s not too bad for a plan B is it? Failure is such a negative word. And the associated feeling is terrible and numbing. But really…how is giving it your all and not succeeding really the same as failing? Shouldn’t the definition of failure not be along the lines of ‘not even trying’ or ‘giving up when it gets hard’?

In other words: stop beating yourself up over this!

There’s really no need to feel like a failure at all because you’re sticking your neck out, you’re trying to make a difference and you’re still moving upward on that treacherous entrepreneurial mountain.

And that…is what success REALLY is.

Those Who Failed Their Way To Success

Quotes To Live By:

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

“If you don’t try at anything, you can’t fail… it takes back bone to lead the life you want” – Richard Yates

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas A. Edison

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie

“Success is stumbling form failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm” – Winston Churchill

“Don’t let success go to your head and failure to your heart” – Will Smith

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Why You Never Have Enough Time and What You Need to Do About It

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Has this ever happened to you? You had an assignment, and the deadline was far away. You didn’t work on it much, but in the back of your mind, that insistent little voice was always whispering, “I gotta get this assignment done.” (more…)

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6 Unusual Exercises to Effectively Increase Your Creativity Faster Than Ever

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Although a vast majority of people think that creativity is something you are born with, the truth is a bit different. While we cannot deny that you need natural talent to a certain extent, stimulating creative thinking is indeed a matter of practice. If you give this thought a bit of thinking, you can realize pretty quickly that even the most fascinating and creative minds have faced the lack of creativity at some point in their lives. (more…)

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3 Psychological Facts That Can Unleash Your Inner Power

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Some people will achieve great things. Others won’t. But why is that? We’re all just “talking monkeys on an organic spaceship flying through the universe,” as Joe Rogan puts it. So why do some “talking monkeys” build 7 or 8 figure businesses, travel the world, and live the life of their dreams while the rest of us… well, wish we were living the life of our dreams. (more…)

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