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3 Powerful Ways to Boost Your Self Confidence When Things Go South

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There will be multiple times in your life where you feel the entire weight of the world on your shoulders. Things won’t go your way, you will lose friends, clients and a sense of who you are. But that comes with the territory of being an entrepreneur. Even some of the most powerful individuals deal with self doubt. Many face the imposter syndrome at some point.

However, the true test of an entrepreneur is how they bring themselves back in the game when things don’t go their way. What type of person do you become when your back is against the wall? Do you give up? Do you thrive under the pressure?

How do the most successful entrepreneurs go through hell and somehow manage to snap back into the game? They play the cards they were dealt with as if it was the hand they wanted, but most importantly, they had the confidence in themselves that no matter what they were going through, they were going to make it out.

“Life is ten percent what you experience and ninety percent how you respond to it.” – Dorothy M. Neddermeyer

I recently interviewed one of the most successful entrepreneurs I know who’s shared the stage with business legends such as Tony Robbins, John Maxwell & Phil Knight. Ed Mylett is a massive serial entrepreneur who’s been interviewed by people like Lewis Howes, Grant Cardone and Matt Manero and is a peak performance coach for some of the top athletes in the UFC and in the NFL.

Here are 3 things I learned about dealing with self confidence:

1. Learn From Someone Who Has a Great Track Record

One of the main reasons why personal development doesn’t work is because of who’s teaching. There’s many people in the online space now who can teach something that they’ve never even done before, it happens all the time. However, the way to avoid that is to do your due diligence and find someone that has a proven track record of not just personal development – but enough life experience.

It’s tougher to teach someone what to do in a certain position if you’ve never even been in that position before. So first things first you need to find the right person to learn from. This will be one of the biggest game changers in your life since you’re not learning from an unreliable source.

2. Self Confidence Comes From Self Trust

Confident people are self trusting people. One of the key ingredients in self confidence is self trust. The same reason you should learn from someone who has a great track record is the same reason you should be confident in yourself.

If you have a track record, why should you doubt yourself? You’ve done it plenty of times before right? It’s nothing new. You’ve proven it time and time again, therefore there’s no need of convincing. If you feel like you have imposter syndrome, it’s because you’re not grounded in who you are as a person and in your abilities.

Is it normal to have doubts? Of course, it happens to everyone. But Tony Robbins says that when successful people are in a funk they don’t stay there. Other people stay in that downward spiral because they don’t know how to get out of it. Personal Development starts with keeping the promises you’ve made to yourself.  

“You are the only person on earth who can use your ability.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Don’t Get Addicted to Other People’s Opinions

One of the reasons you may not have self confidence is because you let your mind be controlled and attacked by other people’s opinions of you. One of my favorite sayings is that “water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship.” This means you can only let the negative opinions of others get to you if you give them any value.

In this era it’s so easy to get consumed by what other people think because of social media. It’s all about the likes, how many selfies you can get…etc. However these short term bursts of approval will eventually govern your life. You will start to live your life based on approval from others instead of where true fulfillment comes from and that’s yourself.

How do you boost your confidence when things aren’t going well? Comment below!

Copywriter, persuasion enthusiast, published author, public speaker, and travel lover is the best way to describe Cole VanDeWoestyne. Cole's fascination with persuasion started almost a decade ago where he first began selling Cutco Knives. It didn't take long for Cole to move his way to Beverly Hills where he was the marketing director for the McLaren dealership for a short time before branching off and starting his writing agency where he has networked with the world's top copywriters, content writers, marketing experts, and storytellers. He's the writer behind many 8 and 9 figure entrepreneurs and has even ghostwritten in a handful of best-selling books. Cole has one goal: Make the world a better place by helping others tell their story. You can follow Cole on social media @Colevandee or on his website Colevandee.com.

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Knowing Your Message vs Delivering Your Message

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Have you ever sent a text message only to have it misinterpreted by the person reading it? Happens all the time. Have you ever given a presentation that you were totally prepared for only to have it fall flat? Happens all the time. Have you ever had someone ask you something like, “Why are you mad?” when you were not at all mad? Happens all the time. (more…)

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The 3 Most Important Things I Learned About Personal Growth

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When you look back on your life, what do you want to think about? Do you plan to reminisce on all of the good things that have happened and how they shaped who you are today? Or would you rather remember all of the bad decisions, challenging experiences, and mistakes made that hurt or wasted a portion of your life?

In my opinion, I think it is important to reflect on both. While it’s important to remember the hardships we’ve been through in our lives – without them we wouldn’t be where we are now. There are 3 very specific areas that I feel have helped me grow in a personal sense more than anything else in my life so far. 

These aren’t simple lessons in a book or a lecture that you can just absorb and apply to your life. These are things that I’ve learned through experience and reflection, and I’m still learning and growing today.

1. We determine how much we’re worth by what we think about ourselves, others, and life in general.

This might seem like a pretty obvious lesson in life but it’s actually one of the most important because we can determine our own worth by how we think about ourselves and the world around us. If you’re looking for success in any kind of business or social setting (dating), then I’ll tell you right now that it doesn’t matter if you have 10 billion dollars or not – people are still going to judge you based on your thoughts and beliefs alone.

What determines our value isn’t necessarily what we do with our lives (which is often based on luck) but whether or not we believe that ‘our work’ is worthy or not in some sort of grand scheme or universe. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can always control how we value ourselves and others.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” – Maya Angelou

2. You don’t have to change your habits or personality just because someone else doesn’t like it – their opinions are THEIRS alone.

This is another one of those lessons that people tend to pick up on a little bit late in life, but if anything that makes its importance even worse! Basically, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to meet someone who has certain expectations of you as a person…but these expectations might not be realistic due to their motivations and personal beliefs. For example, sometimes parents might expect you to be a lawyer or doctor because that’s what they believe is best for their child.

However, this isn’t the case for everyone and so maybe your passion lies in music or writing novels. In this example, if you were also pressured into becoming a doctor – then there would obviously be some kind of conflict going on within yourself as a person. You should never have to give up something that you want to do just because someone else doesn’t like it! The reason why we’re put onto this Earth is to make our own choices and go after our OWN dreams instead of letting others determine what we can and cannot do with our lives .

3. You can’t change your life until you accept that you need to make a change.

When I was younger, I thought that this lesson would be pretty obvious – but as I got older, it really made me appreciate the fact that there are always different ways of perceiving our lives. For example, if someone wants to become rich and famous one day – their mind might simply overshadow any other possibility in their head because they feel like this is what they NEED to do right now.

However, this isn’t always true within our own lives because we think about things too literally instead of having an open mind. If you want to achieve success in any kind of business or social setting (dating) then you should be willing to try out different things instead of staying in your comfort zone. If you want something, then it’s up to YOU to actually go after it – nobody else is going to give it to you!

The three lessons above are some of the main things I want to pass on to everyone because they’ve come at an important time in my life where I need to start thinking about others instead of only myself. It’s great if we can learn to love ourselves first before anything else, but that doesn’t mean you should neglect everyone around you even though they might be your friends and family members!

If you enjoyed this article on the 3 most important things I learned about personal growth, then please share it with your friends and family! Also, check out my other articles on success & motivation as well as life lessons that could help people who are struggling with their life right now on lifengoal.com. Thanks for reading!

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​​4 Boss Level Growth Strategies That Create an Optimized Life

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Building a business is about more than sales, marketing, and flexing on social media. While those things tend to draw attention, they attract the wrong type of clients and are not how you build a sustainable and freedom-focused business. (more…)

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Life

Practicing Self-Devotion: 3 Ways Towards a More Mindful and Compassionate You

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I can still hear the voices of my older relatives and my elementary school teachers telling me “be disciplined”, “keep at it”, to give time and energy towards what we want. As a young, impressionable child, I believed all those things because well, they made sense. They worked. And honestly, I felt like it’s the only way to flourish. (more…)

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