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3 Questions to Stop Asking for Greater Success & Happiness

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We’re often told that asking the right questions is critical to our success, but an equally larger (or bigger) factor can often be asking the wrong questions – or else the right questions at the wrong times. These are questions that seem to have merit but actually derail your focus, motivation, and productivity.

If you feel like you’re struggling to find answers in your life, then one easy place to start is by eliminating these 3 questions:

1. “How Do I…?”

Many years ago, a young speaker was working as an intern for his mentor. He wanted to be as successful as his mentor, so he worked his tail off, trying to build up his skills and abilities as a speaker. At least once a month, he would ask his mentor this question: “How do I become as great a speaker as you are?”

Every single time, his mentor would give him the same reply: “You’re not ready.” This continued for a few years – much to the frustration of the young speaker. Then one day, the young speaker was fed up and told his mentor,“I’m coming for you. I’m going to be better than you are.” At this moment, his mentor replied: “Now you’re ready.”

The point of this short parable is that asking “how” to do anything is often a way of avoiding true commitment. Obviously, there is a time and place for learning how to do something, but the first step is to commit to the outcome – even before you know how you’re going to do it.

For example, if you find yourself constantly asking how to grow your business, then chances are that you’re not actually doing enough. After all, when you’re doing everything you can to reach a goal, your most common question will be a retrospective one – why an experiment did or didn’t work. Commitment is the first step. Once you’re committed to doing anything – from building a business to getting in shape – you will always figure out a way to get it done.

“If you are not willing to risk the usual you will have to settle for the ordinary.” – Jim Rohn

2. “Is This My Passion?”

Surely, you should want to find what you’re passionate about, right? After all, that’s one of the common suggestions for being happier and more successful. The thing is, passion and fulfillment typically come AFTER the hard work that leads to success. In his book “So Good They Can’t Ignore You,” Cal Newport illustrates this through a bunch of research and also this now well-known story…

In 1975, Steve Jobs co-founded Apple. However, at the time, Jobs was passionate primarily about spiritual retreats and meditation, not at all about computers or business. Steve Jobs co-founded Apple because a great opportunity came along at the time to sell assembled hobby computers, and Jobs wanted the extra income.

Now, of course, Jobs went on to love what he did, and in his famous Stanford commencement speech, he emphasized loving what you do. But like so many others, he grew to love what he did because over time and with diligence he became great at it, was recognized for that greatness, and was afforded the opportunity to change and improve the lives of others.

None of this is to say that you should spend your life doing things you hate, but please don’t hold off on doing something just because you’re not sure if it’s the thing that you’re most passionate about. Get started, become great at whatever it is you do, and success, happiness, and even passion will follow.

3. “Am I the Right Person to Do This?”

Sure, we all have some innate skills and characteristics. Some of you might not have the physical characteristics to lead a basketball team to a championship or have the training and talent to be a world-champion chess player.

However, apart from a fairly narrow range of circumstances, this is one of the most limiting questions you can ask. In effect, you’re using your past to limit your future. The truth is that none of us are “perfect” for any task, business, or project, but if you’re committed to making it happen, then you’re absolutely the right person.

I was an attorney for many years before my wife and I started a food manufacturing company, 2 magazines, and a nutrition company. I promise that my time in law school didn’t prepare me for any of that.

Likewise (but much more poignantly), John D. Rockefeller had no business becoming an oil magnate or one of the richest people in history. Born to a father who sold elixirs as a traveling salesman, he became a bookkeeper at the age of 16 and decided to start a business at the age of 20. From there, he went on to dominate the oil industry.

You might not yet believe that you have it in you to be the next great entrepreneur, writer, celebrity, or politician. That’s OK. Belief comes with experience and success, which all starts by never asking this question in the first place.

“You can do anything if you have enthusiasm.” – Henry Ford

Get Moving

As much as anything else, letting go of these questions is all about getting out of your own way and getting the ball rolling. All 3 of these questions are common forms of resistance that can stop or stall your progress, even though they seem like reasonable questions to ask yourself.

There are always more things to know and learn, and there will always be more questions to ask. Nonetheless, the wrong questions will take you on long detours off the path to success.

Your turn. What questions have stalled your progress, and what better questions have you replaced them with?

Jeremy Hendon grew up in Georgia, practiced law for a bit, and then built several companies - from food manufacturing to magazines to health and nutrition platforms. Jeremy has developed apps with 500,000+ downloads, co-authored multiple books, and had his products featured on national TV. He’s still an entrepreneur, but also regularly speaks and consults about crafting marketing stories and messages that resonate, sell, and evolve in the digital age. You can find him at jeremyhendon.com or at curious.show.

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Success Advice

How Your Beliefs Can Supercharge or Sabotage Your Success

Your life is dictated by beliefs and biases that drive your thinking, behaviors, and decisions

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Your Beliefs Can Supercharge or Sabotage Your Success (1)
Image Credit: Midjourney

Pause for a moment and ponder two pandemic-era beliefs: First, closing schools will control the spread of a serious virus. Second, the consequences of such school closures—particularly social interruption and the prevention of immunity—are worse than becoming sick with the virus. (more…)

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Success Advice

How to Break the Cycles of Mediocrity and Manifest Your Greatness

There is no greatness without becoming and there is no becoming with authenticity

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Image Credit: Midjourney

In just a few weeks, we will be wrapping up 2023. Can you believe it? This year has been absolutely incredible for me.

I have seen amazing doors opened, new relationships formed and I am seeing dreams realized in my life. While this seems like the hallmarks of a great year, this has also been the most challenging year of my life. With all of the change happening in my life, I have been forced out of my comfort zone and challenged to grow in every area of my life.

I can truly say that I have made the most of my moments this year and I have used everything as a catalyst for maximizing my greatest potential.

As a revolutionary leader, I have the pleasure of consulting and advising leaders around the world to fulfill purpose, realize their greatest potential and make an impact.

I want to share some insights with you that will help you to break cycles of mediocrity and manifest your greatness

Everything legal must come through the matrix

I am sure that some of you are wondering why I am using the term matrix. However, what you have to understand is that I am trying to make a highly complex spiritual principle practical to understand.

Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, every life has an origin and I believe that origin is divine and begins with eternity. You are birthed from eternity and into time to fulfill a unique purpose and assignment in your lifetime and generation.

The matrix is simply the portal or vehicle that brings something out of the invisible realm and into tangible form. The problem with much of the teaching today is that it excludes the matrix. We are told to believe that success is instantaneous and overnight.

Nobody talks about how a dream progresses through stages beginning with visualization and ultimately culminating in manifestation. Without a matrix or portal then everything that you attempt to birth and build will be illegal.

The matrix not only makes you legal but it gives you the authority and power to function as the greatest expression of who you were created to be. 

Every matrix has an incubation process

While many people admire and respect me today, I remember a time when nobody knew who I was or the significance of my message. How did I get to where I am today? I got here through an incubation process.

In other words, everything that has been destined for your life is incubating and awaiting a set time of manifestation. The problem is that most people live their entire lives idle and never initiate the incubation process.

What do I meany by that? Most people are living reckless and very few people are living intentionally. I am amazed at the number of people I have conversations with that have no vision, goals or strategies for their lives. They show great promise and they have undeniable potential.

However, without development they will die with their dreams still in them.

Everything that has been destined for your life must be incubated and converted to become realities born to time. 

“Visualize this thing that you want, see it, feel it, believe in it. Make your mental blueprint and begin to build.” – Robert Collier

You must give expression to that which is not yet born to time

When you think about a matrix or a prophetic incubation process, you have to understand that potential is often unrealized and untapped. In other words, your potential is in raw form and your potential cannot serve you as long as it is untapped.

The thing that makes me valuable is that I have the ability to convert potential into power. I have done it in my own life and I have empowered leaders around the world to do the same. How do you convert potential into power?

First, it is important to note that you have to perceive potential. If you cannot perceive your potential then you can never cultivate your potential. In addition, you must take the time to cultivate your potential. We often get excited about our capabilities; however, we never expand our capacity in order to realize our greatest potential.

In other words, the strength of your potential is only discovered through your willingness to stretch. The more we are challenged the more we are empowered to expand our capacity for greatness. Most of all, you must begin to express your potential. The expression of potential is different for every person.

For example, the expression of my potential is best demonstrated through the thoughts, ideas, products, services, books, etc.

For another person the expression of potential may look like a screenplay, artwork, sports, scientific discoveries, medical breakthroughs, etc.

Regardless of the form of expression, I know that you will live empty and unfulfilled until you make the decision to express your potential. The expression of your potential gives voice to your dreams, life to your vision, significance to your moments and activates your true power.

You must manifest your greatness

As a revolutionary thinker and leader, my work has impacted people around the world. I am grateful that my life is a source of empowerment to so many people. However, before anyone could ever benefit from my life, I had to make a non-negotiable decision to become who I was born to be.

I wish I could tell you that this journey is easy and that you will get there overnight. However, in a world that celebrates us for doing we are often criticized for being. As a result, I wasted a lot of time trying to be who other people wanted me to be instead of being who I was born to be.

There is no greatness without becoming and there is no becoming with authenticity. It is through our bravery to be vulnerable that we ultimately manifest our greatness. We do not bless the world by being a duplicate. We bless the world when we honor our difference. When you honor your difference you honor your potential.

Ultimately, your difference is how you manifest your greatness.

When you present anything but your authentic self to the world, you are playing small and you are robbing the world of your significance. Manifesting your greatness requires you to master your gifts.

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Success Advice

Here’s a Young Man’s Antidote for the Uncertainty of the Modern World

Why do a lot of young guys lack confidence in today’s world? 

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How to boost your confidence
Image Credit: Midjourney

We all have been told that confidence is a key factor in achieving success and happiness in life. But what is it exactly? (more…)

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Success Advice

Toxic Leadership: 5 Ways to Identify a Bad Leader

if you have a leader who displays any of the toxic traits, it’s time to move on to greener pastures.

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Toxic leadership
Image Credit: Midjourney

Let’s be honest, we’ve all crossed paths with a toxic leader in our careers at some point. Unfortunately, while some toxic leaders don’t even bother to hide their behaviour, some know very well how to conceal their true selves behind a strong-built facade. The latter is the most dangerous of the two. (more…)

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