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The 10 Most Common Excuses for Giving Up and How to Change Them

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Why don’t you live the life you want? It`s because you are full of excuses instead of acting towards your goals. Successful people don’t have excuses to give up, only reasons to succeed. They don’t sit desperately and curse their poor and ugly destiny. You are not weak. You are afraid, and you need something or someone to boost your confidence and push you forward.

Here are the most common excuses for giving up and ways to start to acting NOW:

1. I don’t want to risk it

You risk every time you go to sleep, to not wake up. Do you not sleep because of this possibility? Next time when you think of how stupid or awkward or scary it is for you to risk, ask yourself this – “Would I take a risk if I knew I would not wake up tomorrow morning?

2. I don’t have enough time

It is the most common excuse. You spend hours of your precious day on sleeping, watching TV, spreading rumors about others, feeling sorry over your destiny. Then it’s obvious that you don’t have time. Successful people never spend time on things that take away their energy. When you stop doing at least one thing that takes away your time, you will be more successful.

3. I’m not worthy of success

If you say it, then your life is a real example of how you see yourself. But if you say “I`m successful, I can do this. At least I can try” you will live a different truth. Who says you need to be worthy of what you want? You just have to stop negative self-talk. Those are the words of someone else.

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection” – Buddha

4. I don’t know anything about that business

You can learn free information on the Internet about the topic that interests you. Search the ones that come from influential people, successful entrepreneurs, and bloggers. Read their process of success. The success didn’t happen overnight, but they knew what they wanted and went after it.

5. There are no opportunities for me

Opportunities are everywhere. You can’t see them because you don’t believe that they exist. If you want to succeed, look how many opportunities are waiting for you to grab them. When you are open to new opportunities, you see them or create your own. Successful people are creating their opportunities. They are not waiting for them to come.

6. I am afraid of failure

There is no fear of failure but only a fear of success. Insecurity brings you a feeling of panic. What if I succeed? My life will change; I don’t feel like I’m ready for that. How will I manage  success? Being successful brings more work, more obligations. Will I know how to handle all that money? I never had that much money in my life. Is your focus on success or fear of failure? Focus on what you want and what is good now in your life. And you will achieve each goal on which is your focus.

7. Maybe I need to stay where I am

No, you don’t need to stay where you are if that doesn’t fulfill you. Yes, you have to be thankful for your present, no matter how hard it seems. But don’t stay in it if you have (and we all have) a will to change it. You have to get out of your negative comfort zone and create a new, more positive one. Change your habits, day by day, with baby steps.

8. My goals are big and unattainable

There are no small or big goals. It’s the way you see them. If some goals scare you, then you will say it’s unattainable because it’s too big.

Split your “big” goal into small, daily steps, as your smaller goals. But have higher goals in mind or written on paper. Some of the greatest people in the world would not have been so great if they had small goals.

If Henry Ford didn’t have a “big” goal to mass produce affordable cars for middle-class Americans, he would never have achieved it. If Roger Federer didn’t have a “big” goal to win all four Grand Slam tournaments, he would never have won them.

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” – Thomas A. Edison

9. I am of afraid what others will say

The fear of criticism comes from your childhood. You depended on your parent’s opinion and from older people in your life. You gained a belief that you must do what others say to be accepted. There will always be someone who will not like you and the way you live. You don’t need to adapt to others, but to follow your inner feelings. Only that way you will live free from fear of criticism.

10. I don’t know from where to start

Searching information without using it in your reality feels overwhelming. Instead, to collect too much information, start with one thing that is your priority at the moment. And use it in your life. Try it first. Then move on to the next one. You will not get anywhere until you act. As long as you only read and think about success, you will stay in the exact same place you are now.

What success means to you now and what it will mean when you become active, will be two different things. When you activate, there will be no more excuses for you to give up. There will be only reasons WHY you need to succeed.

What excuse do you hear the most? Leave your thoughts below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Motivation

How to Stay Motivated to Achieve Your Goals

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Time is the raw material of our lives. How we choose to spend it, shapes our life accordingly. So having the motivation to spend it on achieving goals is crucial to creating a life we want.

What is Motivation?

The Oxford dictionary defines motivation as the desire or willingness to do something – our drive to take action.

Scientifically, motivation has its roots in the dopamine pathways of our brains. When we do something that feels good, that’s dopamine kicking in. Our actions are driven by the desire for that reward (the good feeling).

Author Steven Pressfield describes motivation more practically. He says we hit a point where the pain of not doing something becomes greater than the pain of doing it. He sees motivation as crossing the threshold where it’s easier to take action than it is to be idle. Like choosing to feel awkward while making sales calls over feeling disappointed about a diminishing bank account.

However you choose to think about it, we all want to harness motivation to achieve our goals. 

How to Get Motivated

James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, says that most people misunderstand motivation. They think that motivation is what gets us to take action. In reality, motivation is often the result of action, not the cause of it. Once we start a task, it’s easier to continue making progress. Like Isaac Newton’s first law: objects in motion stay in motion.

This means most of the resistance when working on your goals comes right before we start. Since motivation naturally occurs after we start, we need to focus on making starting easier.

4 Ways to Make Starting Easier

1. Schedule it

One reason people can’t get started on things is that they haven’t planned when to do it. 

When things aren’t scheduled it’s easier for them to fall by the wayside. You’ll end up hoping motivation falls in your lap or hoping that you’ll muster enough willpower to get it done.

An article in the Guardian said, “If you waste resources trying to decide when or where to work, you’ll impede your capacity to do the work.”

2. Measure something

It’s easy to feel uninspired when you don’t know if you’re making progress or what you’re even working towards. That’s why you need to make your success measurable in some way. Starting is easy when you know exactly how much closer your current actions will bring you to achieving your goal.

3. Extrinsic motivation

This type of motivation is from external factors. It can be either positive or negative. Positive motivation consists of incentives like money, prizes, and grades. Negative motivation consists of deterrents like being fired, having a fight, or being fined. Extrinsic motivation doesn’t work effectively long-term, but it can work well in the short term to get you started on something.

4. Make it public

Keep yourself accountable by telling friends and family your goals, or even sharing them on social media. This makes it easier to start something because you’re pressured to not let others down.

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” – Zig Ziglar

How to Stay Motivated Long Term

When we say we want to feel motivated to do something, we don’t want to be pushed or guilted into doing a task. We want to be so attracted and drawn to the idea that we can’t resist not taking action. That’s why it’s important to build a foundation that will set you up for consistency.

These are 5 techniques that will help you do just that:

1. Stay in your goldilocks zone

The goldilocks zone is when a task is the perfect level of difficulty—not too hard and not too easy. In this zone, we reach peak motivation and focus.

For example, let’s say you’re playing a serious tennis match against a 4-year-old. On this level of difficulty, you’ll quickly become bored and not want to play. Now let’s say you’re playing a serious tennis match against Serena Williams. On this level of difficulty, you’ll quickly become demotivated because the match is too challenging. 

The Goldilocks zone is in the middle of that spectrum. You want to face someone with equal skill as you. That way you have a chance to win, but you have to focus and try for it. Adjusting your workload and goals over time to stay within your Goldilocks zone keeps you engaged and motivated long-term.

2. Pursue intrinsically motivated goals

Being intrinsically motivated to achieve a goal is when you want to achieve it for what it is. There are no external factors like a reward or the risk of being fired. The drive behind your actions is coming from within. 

For most intrinsic goals we pursue them because they will enrich our lives or bring us closer to fulfillment. That makes these goals extremely sustainable long-term because they directly affect our quality of life and the things we care about.

3. Use “chunking”

Chunking is the technique of breaking down a goal into smaller short-term targets. By doing this you achieve multiple successes in your pursuit of the main goal. This triggers the brain’s reward system and drives you to keep going.

Traditionally, you may set a goal that you expect to achieve in one year. That’s a long time to commit without seeing any results along the way. By chunking your goals into monthly or quarterly targets, you get the consistent positive reinforcement you need to stay motivated long-term.

For example, instead of trying to lose 50 pounds in one year, try to lose 4 pounds every month for 12 months.

4. Be flexible

We’re all victims of circumstance. Things happen along our journey that we can either adjust to or quit because of. That’s why it’s important to have leeway and flexibility when you’re pursuing a goal. If you expect everything to go perfectly, the inevitable failure can make you disengaged and desireless. When you plan for things to go wrong, you make sure you can keep up for the long haul.

5. Pursue your goals in a sustainable fashion

Don’t lose hope when you’re not an overnight success. Overnight successes are the 1%—for the most part, they don’t exist. What we see as an “overnight success” is actually countless hours of work behind the scenes finally hitting a tipping point. Pursuing goals is a story of patience, persistence, and unseen effort.

Don’t compare yourself to others. Comparison is a recipe for a drop in self-confidence and satisfaction. It also cultivates a mindset where you think you haven’t done enough. As a result, you may raise your expectations and put more pressure on yourself.

This is pointless because things worth achieving take time. So we obviously won’t compare to the things around us when starting.

Mastering motivation is a superpower. With that ability at your fingertips, you can accomplish your goals and shape a life you want to live in.

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Motivation

What Is Dark Motivation and How Can I Use It to My Advantage?

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It’s Thursday, 8 PM. I’m relaxing at home, doing normal things, and scrolling social media. Tomorrow is a big day. There are lots of things to do with moving pieces of furniture because I’m moving to another city. On top of that, a repairman is coming to my house at 8AM, so I’ll have to get up early. (more…)

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Motivation

The Killer Morning Routine to Boost Motivation

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If you’re anything like me, waking up in the morning is a hard task. Over the course of a number of years I’ve built a routine that helps wake me up and keeps me motivated. (more…)

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Motivation

Why “No Pain, No Gain” Is More Powerful Than You Realize

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Chances are you’ve heard the quote “No pain, no gain” before. Especially if you enjoy hitting the gym and getting a nice pump going on. What this means is that in order to make your muscles grow, you’ll have to shred the fibers so they can grow back bigger and stronger. This progress causes physical pain because you’re tearing apart your muscles, but the reward for the pain is always worth it. (more…)

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