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Today I Realized I’m Going To Die

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I’ve been feeling low on energy lately.

I went to the doctor and he sent me off for a blood test. The results came back.

Apparently, according to my doctor, the results couldn’t have been more perfect.

Eight weeks passed and something still felt off. Having had a health scare before where the surgeon found a lump the size of a golf ball in my guts, I don’t take risks when it comes to my health anymore. No more smoking, drinking, or crap food. Life is too important.

Back to my story. So at my second doctor’s appointment, I got asked a strange question:

“Tim I’m all out of ideas. Do you know what might be causing your low energy?”

Jesus now I’m supposed to play the role of the doctor. I couldn’t help but wonder why I was paying for the doctors time although I blocked that out of my head.

It will come as no surprise that I also couldn’t figure out the issue either. Then my doctor said to me:

“Let’s check your blood pressure again even though I checked it last time.”

He checked my blood pressure again and that’s when things got real. Apparently, my blood pressure was much lower than when he checked eight weeks prior. Having no clue why the doc sent me to have a heart scan.

The results of the heart scan are still pending. This whole episode got me thinking.

I’m going to die and so are you

Writing that headline gave me chills but it’s true amigo. Whether it’s this medical issue with the blood pressure thing or something else; we’re all going to die.

That’s what I learned from my second health scare. We think we are so damn smart and we know we are going to die. The truth is we know we are going to die but subconsciously tell ourselves it’s going to happen sometime in the very distant future.

As I saw today, death could be brewing at any moment. The grim reaper could come and take you without notice.

You may not get a second shot

This whole health scare has shown me again that I may not get a second shot. This could be the last blog post I ever write. Tonight could be the last beautiful woman I ever kiss.

So given that we don’t know when our time will come, I believe we have to treat every moment like it’s our last shot. I write every blog post as if it’s my last.

Death is why speed matters

The uncertainty of death is what makes me want to act quickly. I don’t hesitate to do anything. If I feel something, want something, or believe something then I act right now. Not tomorrow, not next year, not when the time is right: right bloody now!

That’s what many of you are missing. You think you’ve got all the time in the world but you don’t.

“The whole notion of death doesn’t have to be a big fat, Debbie Downer. You can treat the concept of death as the excuse that you fall back on when you procrastinate”

If you hate your job, then quit today.
If you want to inspire people, then do it today.
If you love someone, then don’t wait to tell him or her.

Mathematical Equation: UNDERSTANDING DEATH x TIME = Legacy

The moment it hit me that death is really going to happen, I changed the way I thought about time. Now all of my time is used to create a legacy. Death is a certainty, so there’s no time like now to create your legacy.

Legacy, to me, is the thing that will see me live on after my physical form is gone. This whole self-improvement movement combined with content creation is what I’m using to create my legacy. For you, the process could be different.

I suppose what I want you to get from this blog post is that not only are you going to die, but I want you to do something that matters. I want you to come to the same realization I have and create a whopping big legacy.

I used to be very naïve and think that I would never have children of my own. I thought to myself “Hey I’m a big shot and I need all the time in the world to go out and be successful!”

This whole way of thinking was BS. Creating a legacy is success. Going beyond yourself and having kids or serving others rather than your own selfish desires is success.

“Being the best version of you and finding a meaning for your life is the goal that matters”

The question I asked myself…..

To check in and see how I was going on this idea of death, I asked myself a question: “What if I knew I was going to die in the next four weeks? How would I feel?

If I had of asked these two question five years ago, I would have said “Freaking horrible!”

Now I have a different answer to these two questions. Now I would say that while I would be disappointed that the journey has come to an end, I’m proud of who I’ve become. I’m proud of my legacy.

It’s this answer that makes me so proud and has been the best learning experience from this recent health scare. It’s put death in perspective for me and it’s made me figure out the answers to life’s greatest questions.

What action could you take to build a legacy?
Are you proud of who you’re becoming?
If not, why, and what are you going to do about it?

A new way to feel about death

Rather than death being this horrible thing that I never want to experience, it’s now my motivation. It gives me optimism. It tells me if I’m on the right path.

It stops me from being the rude, selfish, spoilt brat I used to be who wasn’t grateful for anything that this world had given me including life itself. That’s how many people live. That’s not how you should live.

You’re going to die and it may not be that far away.

I’d tell you from my experience and health scare to fall in love with that fact.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

Aussie Blogger with 500M+ views — Writer for CNBC & Business Insider. Inspiring the world through Personal Development and Entrepreneurship You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.com

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The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

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Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.

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It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

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Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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