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7 Warning Signs That You Will Never Achieve Your Dream

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According to the title of a popular motivational magazine manual, there are no UN-achievers, but please don’t mention that to the people who are already failing at their dream. He or she might be apt to bust your beak for you. And no matter how much I encourage people to take their dream seriously, I can’t lie and say there are no UN-achievers.

Sorry, but there are a lot of people who will end up not achieving their dream. Sometimes men and women never take their dream seriously. Some have doodled their time away at home waiting for the right time to achieve their dream, and others are stuck in a job or career trying to fit in.

The truth is, few people know what they want; most people never realize if their dream is born within them or borrowed from another. I’ve spoken to many individuals who admit that their current pursuit is something their parents or a close relationship desires for them. Most people never find dedicated time to pursue their inner passion.

I am approaching the heart of this post with two of these passions; both are simple. The first is to help you realize that passion is the best answer to the distress. The best place to build your well of blessings is the place you’re hurting the most. The second is if you don’t like your present situation you can change your approach and follow through with your passion for becoming an achiever.

The following seven factors will help you recognize the things that are holding you back from achieving your dream and how you can remove them:

1. Looking For Someone To Approve Your Dreams

One of the stumbling blocks people face in achieving their dream is thinking that their dream is too good to be true and feel they need approval before they can pursue such a dream. But the truth is, you don’t need anyone’s approval. No, not even the Gatekeepers!

Chances are, people will envy you, some will sneer at you, and others won’t even care when you’re in the pursuit of your passion. And they are right because your dream does not require the approval of everyone you love.

“So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.” – Christopher Reeve

2. Not Giving Your Dreams Immediate Attention

Most of the time, we think our dream is temporary or only a fad, and we often take some time before we take action toward achieving it.

Can I be sincere with you for a moment? The best thing you can do toward achieving your dream is to start now, move quickly, start with anything, no matter how small it is. Every day you will be making progress, and it never stops until you achieve that goal.

3. Not Dedicating A Little Focus To Your Dreams

Dedicating your total focus to your dream will keep you creative, passionate, and persistent. It will reduce the focus on the unnecessary activities of your day. In fact, passive people might start finding your presence uncomfortable and will often look for somewhere else to feed their lazy and sluggish walk through life.

In a real sense, devoting total focus to your dream will help you fast track the process toward becoming an achiever.

4. Not Building Your Daily Agenda Around Your Dream

Someone once wrote: “Today’s work lies behind tomorrow’s success.” If you want to achieve your dream in your lifetime quickly, you must develop the momentum to schedule everyday activities around your dream accordingly.

Ask yourself, ‘What could you do today to move one step closer toward achieving your dream?’ Write it down and take the appropriate action.

5. Not Building The Right Relationship Connected To Your Dream

Dexter writes, “The successful person associates with those who support his dream.” Believe it! You must begin to associate yourself with people who share the same vision with you, don’t try to do it alone.

Mention your dream in a phone conversation, affirm it to friends who you think are important and would do anything to see you achieving such a goal. Be bold in declaring your dream in your day to day living.

6. Thinking You Don’t Have What It Takes To Launch Your Dream

Most of the time, the stumbling block that holds people back from achieving their dream is for people to think that they don’t have what it takes right now to launch an exceptional desire.

The truth is, you already have all you need, you just have to start feeding and fueling it until it becomes an obsession. Your obsession will be the magnet that will pull others toward you to help participate in your dream.

“Your success depends mainly upon what you think of yourself and whether you believe in yourself.” – William J. H. Boetcker

7. Thinking You Don’t Need A Geographical Change

The question is, do you dream about being somewhere else? Where? And why aren’t you moving toward it? You might think you currently don’t have the resources required to achieve such a goal, but the truth is, a leap of faith is required for you to do anything that must be done to keep moving forward.

You must develop a genuine passion for your dream and take a step toward achieving it in your day to day living. Though you might not see any immediate reward, keep moving until you sail into the land of harmony and finally achieve your dream.

What are you doing today to get closer to your dreams? Leave your thoughts below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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9 Comments

9 Comments

  1. Bryan

    Dec 9, 2018 at 8:46 am

    So much painful truth packed into this blog post. I have always been someone who looks for approval in my decisions. This often leads me to make the choice too late and missing my chance.

    When it comes to relationships that is one place I struggle also. I often choose to go at it alone instead of getting the needed help from a friend or a co-worker. So lots for me to think about.

  2. Tom Alon Vedasto

    Apr 16, 2018 at 11:12 pm

    The worst part is realizing that you actually don’t know what to dream about.

  3. Barbara Miller

    Sep 18, 2017 at 9:31 am

    I am so happy I have had none of the above issues interfere in the pursuit of my dream. I call it a mission. This could be as I had a knowing as a child that there was something very special in my future. You are 100% correct that we need faith. We need to want our dream more than life itself. People will sneer at you and many friends will not support you. You may even feel like you walk alone. I am looking for the right connections to go to the next step. I am seeking a publicist that can get me booked on TV talk shows as I need to increase awareness that my quit smoking plan is the one that will change the way people/the world quits. I have always asked myself, ” What is ONE thing I can do to get closer to my dream?” The answer got was get in kick-ass shape! Many years later as a public speaker, ready for TV, I am sure glad I look like a million bucks!

  4. Cephas Tope

    Mar 5, 2017 at 4:27 pm

    Glad it rang true Patty, Yes, keep fighting for your dream and soon you’ll start seeing great result. Thanks so much!

  5. pushkar choudhary

    Mar 3, 2017 at 7:47 am

    hi cephas you wrote a very good article. keep it up.????

    • Cephas Tope

      Mar 5, 2017 at 4:24 pm

      Thanks so much pushkar, glad you enjoy the post!

  6. Mark Tong

    Feb 24, 2017 at 6:13 pm

    Hi Cephas – you really nailed some of the things that you need to et that perky goal moving froward – I’m considering no7 at the moment

    • Cephas Tope

      Mar 5, 2017 at 4:25 pm

      Great Comment Mark, Glad you find it of value.

  7. Patty

    Feb 20, 2017 at 3:42 pm

    Cephas, you have touched on everything I’ve been experiencing while working toward my dream. Very few people understand it or encourage my dream but I am determined to keep moving on till I see it and carry it out. Thanks for your encouragement today.

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Life

6 Reasons Why You Should Never Glorify Failure After You’ve Failed

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Many people are ashamed of failure. If they so much as smell a whiff of failure, they quit instantly because the public notices it quickly. But you shouldn’t be ashamed of failure. A lot of people have failed. I’ve failed over and over again in my career, business, relationships and more. Yet, I keep trying because failure isn’t the final verdict. (more…)

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How to Move Forward When All Seems Lost

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A few weeks ago, the relationship of my venture with a long-term client turned rocky. Losing them would mean a huge loss for my business, but it appeared like that’s where we were headed. My mind raced with unpleasant thoughts. Maybe the client had figured out that I couldn’t lead my team well. Maybe I was not good enough to be an entrepreneur. Maybe I was not good enough to do anything.

Why was the world so unfair?! Within moments, my anxiety had shot through the roof and my heart was racing faster than an F1 car engine. But I know I’m not the only one who feels like this.

Why Problems Overwhelm Us

As human beings, we’re good at solving problems, so they shouldn’t stress us out. Yet, they do just that. Why?

Consider some of these situations in life. When a relationship is headed for troubled waters, we wonder whether our partner loves us anymore. Our mind unearths memories of when we got dumped or rejected. We blame ourselves for falling for the wrong people and tell ourselves that we’re not worth receiving love.

How do you think the relationship will steer after that? If we cannot stick to a diet, we think of other times when we gave up. We remember what people said about things that we couldn’t do and ask ourselves, “were they right?” We tell ourselves that we don’t have what it takes to succeed at anything.

Do you think we’ll find the grit to stick to the diet after this? So here we are… thinking we’re not good enough to be entrepreneurs, to be loved, to get promoted, or to achieve our personal goals. Notice a pattern yet? We move in the wrong direction. The destination is to achieve the goal. And unless we stop giving into emotions and start addressing situations, we’ll keep failing to get there.

Negative emotions (and even extremely positive ones) blur our vision. The more we focus on them, the deeper we go into how we feel. We either get angry because things aren’t the way we want them to be, or get paralyzed by the fear of the worst possible outcome. This means we pull away from the one thing we must do to set things right — take action.

“If you can’t sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It’s the worry that gets you, not the loss of sleep.” – Dale Carnegie

How to Take Action in the Face of Problems

Most human beings are good at solving problems. Where we get blindsided is at diagnosing the right problem. To diagnose the right problem, we must address the situation instead of emotions. We must see things for what they are, collect facts on what we’re worrying about, and then ask ourselves, “What should I do next?”

In his book “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, Dale Carnegie wrote: “Neither you nor I nor Einstein nor the Supreme Court of the United States is brilliant enough to reach an intelligent decision on any problem without first getting the facts.”

To address the tricky situation with my client, I took the following three steps:

1. First, I acknowledged the feeling

Solving a problem doesn’t mean ignoring emotions. It’s important to acknowledge how you feel because it reveals the path, but domesticating your emotions is more important. I acknowledged how I felt by saying, “I feel anxious because the client might not want to work with us anymore and this will be a financial loss for us.”

Note how I said “I feel anxious” and not “I’m a loser.” If I had given into negative chatter, I wouldn’t have uncovered the direction to move in (the part after “because”). This is why domesticating emotions is crucial.

2. Next, I prepared for the worst

We often run from our worst fears rather than facing them despite knowing that the worst outcome rarely comes true. The result is that we stay stuck in fear instead of pushing beyond it. And we never discover what we’re really capable of, which sucks.

In my case, the worst meant losing the client. It would hurt but it was the truth. However, we could get more clients. Plus we already had other clients who helped us pay the bills. In other words, I wouldn’t have to live on the street.

The moment I accepted this, a huge weight got lifted off my chest. This prepared me for the third and final step.

“Expect the best. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Lastly, I examined the situation

Examining a situation means setting aside your emotional baggage and focusing on facts. When you trust that you’ll be okay, you become better at diagnosing the real problem. Once I felt lighter, I could see things clearly.

I used the 5 Whys Technique (asking “why” five times) to figure out the real reason for the client’s dissatisfaction. Then I collected data on the issue and on what we had previously delivered.

Finally, I reached out to the CEO of the client and held a detailed and constructive discussion based on my findings. Within four days, the CEO and I were back to the way things were before.

The best way to prepare for tomorrow is to give today your best. I’m not sure whether the issue with the client got resolved for good or whether the client won’t pack up and leave one day. However, I am sure that I’m prepared to handle such cases better today than I was yesterday.

Control your emotions instead of letting them run amok. Accept things for what they are instead of what you want them to be. Be realistic instead of delusional. Address the situation instead of succumbing to emotions.

Don’t preempt what lies ten miles ahead and get paralyzed by fear. Address what lies clearly in front of you and keep moving. One day you’ll be surprised about how close to your destination you are.

How do you move forward when all hope seems to be lost? Share your advice below!

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8 Effective Tips to Improve Your Emotional Wellbeing

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You know what they say, “Health Is Wealth”. But, more often than not, we only mean it in the context of physical health. There’s no question that being fit is the world’s greatest treasure. Unfortunately, not a lot of us take time out to look after our emotional health and wellbeing.

Let’s not forget – it’s ‘Mind Over Matter’. So, if you are able to take control of your emotions, thoughts, how you feel through the day and how you respond to myriad situations; there’s nothing quite like it. When you become the master of your emotions; health, prosperity, and basically all good things are bound to follow you.

With that said, here are 8 surefire ways that will improve your emotional wellbeing:

1. Practice Mindfulness

Half the time, we don’t even know what we’re thinking or how we’re feeling. That’s because we let our minds operate on autopilot. It’s time to take control of your mind. Be aware of what and how you feel throughout the day. The upside to this practice is that you can detect negative emotions right on the onset and quickly change them and their corresponding feeling.

Feelings of anger, jealousy, hatred; they are not good for the mind, soul, or the body. Paying close attention to the spectrum of emotions you experience throughout the day, will help you detect the negative ones and kick them away before they fester deep enough to take away your happiness and emotional health.

2. Stay Physically Active

As you engage in physical activities, your brain produces a whole bunch of feel-good hormones such as endorphins and dopamine. These hormones are what causes the ‘elated’ or ‘euphoric’ feeling. Being physically active uplifts your mood and your outlook towards life. It readies you to take the challenges more head-on instead of becoming overwhelmed by the littlest of inconvenience.

You are better able to analyze tough situations and take a more proactive rather than a reactive approach. It’s no question physical health is in direct proportion with emotional health. A healthy mind resides in a healthy body and vice versa.

“Caring for the mind is as important and crucial as caring for the body. In fact, one cannot be healthy without the other.” – Sid Garza-Hillman

3. Get Sufficient Sleep

Ever noticed how you feel depressed and cranky, and just out of focus the day you fail to get a good night’s sleep? Well, if you fail to get sufficient sleep for a couple of days, you are bound to feel more depressed, cranky and eventually more prone to a host of negative emotions. Research shows that sleep deprivation sends amygdala – our brain’s emotional response center into overdrive.

Amygdala controls our immediate emotional responses. When it becomes overactive, we become more reactive rather than active. We become more irritable, angry and anxious. A good night’s sleep is vital to improving your emotional wellbeing.

4. Develop a New Hobby

Learn to swim. Try arts and crafts. How about painting? Swimming is a ‘happy’ activity. You get to make new friends and stay fit. Arts and crafts, as we all know, tends to have a relaxing effect on the mind and the nerves.

Just the process of creating something from scratch makes you confident and gets those creative juices flowing. Similarly, painting helps you express yourself. All these factors together create a ‘happy you’. The one who likes to engage in new things instead of resisting change or difficult situations.

5. Eat Healthy

Ever heard of the phrase, “You are what you eat”? Well, it’s true to the last syllable. When you eat foods rich in salt, sodium, fat – you are bound to feel lethargic. It takes longer for the body to digest such foods. That means the body is forced to deprive organs of blood and use it for the digestion purpose.

Result? You become lazy, moody, not ready to take any responsibility which leads to feeling cranky and irritable. On the other hand, eating fibrous vegetables, fruits, salads, and complex sugars keeps you upbeat and healthy.

6. Laugh Your Heart Out

Laughter is the best medicine. That is why they have a dedicated ‘laughter session’ in yoga studios. You don’t even have to mean it. The simple act of spreading your cheeks and pretending to laugh sends a signal to your body that you are happy.

And what happens when you are happy? Your brain releases happy hormones like dopamine, serotonin and what not. In fact, many studies have gone so far as to stipulate that laughter alone is capable of treating all kinds of physical ailments. Why should emotional ailments be any different?

7. Try Relaxation Techniques

‘’Visualization technique’’ where you imagine yourself in a happy place is a surefire way to calm your nerves if you find yourself distressed. You may also try praying to elate yourself. Praying is good for the mind and the soul.

Controlled breathing or ‘biofeedback technique’ are some other relaxation techniques that can tame how you feel and even your bodily functions. Try surrounding yourself with aromatherapy or scented candles because the smell is a big factor in governing how we feel.

“Positive emotional energy is the key to health, happiness and wellbeing. The more positive you are, the better your life will be in every area.” – Brian Tracy

8. Count Your Blessings

We all have so much to be thankful for. It could be a friend who stands by you or a happy family. Good health. Financial freedom. Make a list of all the things that you feel grateful for in your life. If it’s a person, be sure to communicate your feelings and express your gratitude.

You will feel so much happier. Happiness is the diet of a healthy mind and an intelligent emotional response mechanism. You could also try writing a poem or simply expressing your gratitude through the power of prayers.

There are so many ways to become emotionally intelligent and not one of them requires any investment or special skills. Practically anyone and everyone can do it. All you need is the will and the desire.

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How You Can Use the Power of Gratitude to Your Advantage

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The word gratitude has been tossed around, but do you know exactly what it means or how to implement it into your life? Someone has probably told you in your life, “Express more gratitude.” Well, that sounds like a great idea, but if you don’t know what gratitude is, how can you fully express it in your life? It’s a concept that once you grasp, it will change your life. (more…)

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