Life
3 Ways to Be Unforgettable to Everyone You Meet

Have you ever met someone, had a conversation, and then you part ways only to know that there is a possibility you will see them again? When you do see them again, do you struggle to remember much in regards to the conversation? You see that specific person, and are hoping they do not address you by name since you cannot remember theirs?
This use to be a huge issue for me especially when I would meet someone new in a meeting, have a conversation about their past year and family, but yet forget about almost all of it by the next time I see them.
There is a system I implemented that may sound crazy, but it works wonders and all one needs is a voice recorder.
Here are three easy ways to impress someone by remembering things about them:
1. Record yourself speaking about the subject of interest after the interaction happens
An example is when going on a date and learning something new about them, I would leave at the end of the date, take out my voice recorder on my phone and repeat anything that I could remember from our conversation such as names, dates, employment, cute quirks, or even her favorite things.
This allowed me to go back and listen to the recording before I saw her again, so when we spoke, I would use more personable words that the majority of people would not remember, but I did. For example, instead of saying “How is your brother doing?” I would say “How is [insert name of brother]?”
For most people, family is very personal, and so remembering the little things such as their names, takes one a very long way. This created a sense of trust, comfort, and feeling as though I was different than the “other men” they had dated.
“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” – Stephen R. Covey
2. Engage in active listening
This might seem obvious, but I am shocked when I see how many people are engaged in passive listening, or are thinking about what they are going to say while the person they are speaking with is talking. When one actively listens, they fully concentrate, understand, respond and then remember what is being said.
An example is that someone may ask someone “How was your day?” After the person responds, they reply not with a follow up question about their day, but bringing back to conversation to them. This is a big no no. One must inquire if they say “My day was good,” then ask “Why was it good!” “What was the best part of your day?” Have them talk more so you can truly understand why their day was good.
3. Ask questions
Make sure to always ask questions. I have realized that the more I am focused on the conversation, the more I can ask follow up questions without forcing the conversation. One’s goal should be to ask such great follow up questions that the person they are speaking to does not realize that they are still talking. Before they know it, you will know much more about them than they do about you, and that keeps you interesting and mysterious.
Everyone wants to feel valued, loved, and cared for, so by using this technique, you will remember specific details about your conversation that will astonish the other person.
They will find that you are different and actually care, which is the whole purpose of recording whatever details you can remember after the conversation. Be different so that you can be unforgettable to everyone you meet.
“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.” – Voltaire
You should always strive to be unforgettable to everyone that you meet. Have you ever used any of these techniques to be unforgettable? Leave your comments below.
Life
The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance
Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see? (more…)
Life
Failing is More Important Than Succeeding
Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

People often consider failure a stigma. Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life. (more…)
Life
5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.
Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.
Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.
Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.
However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.
Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:
1. Unconscious Sabotage
Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.
This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.
Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.
This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.
3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma
4. A strong need for control
5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained
What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?
There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:
- Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
- Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
- Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
- Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
- Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.
It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.
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