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19 Tactics That Successful People Use To Communicate Effectively

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how successful people communicate effectively

No doubt you’ve had that feeling. The feeling of a creative breakthrough. You’re immediately charged with the energy of a new idea. Your skin literally itches, you want to share this with someone.

So you find someone to tell. You are about to birth this genius to the world, and then……crickets. Ouch. It’s not even anything they say. They nod, they mmhhm, they’re polite. But the lack of enthusiasm shows in their face. It’s almost as cold as a rejection.

Frustrating isn’t it? But what if there were ways to carry ideas from your mind to theirs, without any thoughts getting lost on the journey? Well, there are, it’s simply a matter of improving your communication skills.

Here are 19 communication tips that are known by movers and shakers the world over, from Steve Jobs to Oprah Winfrey:

1. Follow the 3 second rule

When someone stops talking and you’re worried about interrupting them, count to three before you jump in. Some people talk with extra-long pauses and it’s hard to build rapport, in this case the 3 second rule will stop you from coming across as rude or abrupt.  

 

2. Move and speak 30% slower

Quick and erratic movements and speech communicates uncertainty, nervousness, and a general inability to manage your energy. On the other hand slow and deliberate movements communicate power and a confidence that comes from experience.  

 

3. Relax your neck and shoulders

 We hold a lot of tension in our upper body, by letting your body communicate how comfortable you are, you allow the person you’re talking to to feel more comfortable.

“I remember Tyra Banks giving me encouraging advice during my first Victoria’s Secret commercial shoot. I was so nervous, and she told me to just relax and be confident – that made me feel very comfortable.” – Adriana Lima

4. Listen and Repeat

By paraphrasing what the other person has said you show that you’re really paying attention and absorbing their input.

 

5. Put your phone on silent

Although it’s very common for people to let their phones ring mid conversation, that doesn’t mean it should be done. Think of a conversation like two people dancing, every time a phone rings it’s like the DJ has changed the song abruptly and the rhythm of the interaction is interrupted.

 

6. Nod your head

Don’t just sit there stiff and staring blankly while the other person is talking. Nodding your head is a simple way to show that you’re still listening.

 

7. Point your body and feet towards the person you’re talking to

 When we want to leave a conversation, we unconsciously point our feet towards where we want to go. Show they have your undivided attention by pointing yourself in their direction.

 

8. Don’t touch your face

This is a nervous tick that most of us have, it subtly conveys uncertainty or even distrust.

 

9. Sit up straight

 What your 4th grade teacher used to screech at you actually has some merit. It’s good for your confidence, charisma, and even digestion—but again, make sure you are relaxed and not tense.

 

10. Assume the best of people

 People to a large extent mirror what you expect of them. Johann Goethe said “If we take man as he is, we make him worse. But if we take him as he should be, then we make him capable of becoming what he can be.”  

 

11. Stop thinking about your next brilliant sentence

When the other person is speaking, most people spend 90% of the time thinking about what to say next, and only 10% actually listening—don’t be most people.

12. Mirror and lead

When talking to someone with lower or higher energy than you, you want to match the tone, cadence, and tempo of their speech, then slowly lead them in the direction you want them to go.

 

 

13. Break eye contact to the side

 Looking down is another way you might be conveying discomfort, it can also suggest the end of a conversation.

 

14. Speak in human terms

Whenever trying to get an idea across you want to talk about it in terms of the benefits for the other person. For example, if you are telling them your idea for a book or product, explain how it could help someone like them before you talk about what you consider are interesting features.

 

15. Memorize quotes

 Quotes are an effective and memorable way to reinforce the points you’re making, just make sure to use them sporadically.

 

16. Know your ticks

Everyone has small ticks in interpersonal conversations, whether it’s rubbing your hands together or scratching your nose. Watching yourself on camera is a great way to identify and eliminate them.

 

17. Never text and talk

 If you need to text mid-conversation, say excuse me I just need to message X for X reason, and when you’ve sent the message, put the phone away.

“I like to talk to people. I’ve got one assistant, one Blackberry. That’s my overhead. I don’t text that much or email. I like to sit down face-to-face and have a conversation with you. I’m old-fashioned.” –  Mark Wahlberg

18. Emphasize with gestures

When you are making a point, it’s good to emphasize with gestures.

 

19. Show appreciation

Take every opportunity to tell someone that you appreciate them, whether it’s their work, their ideas, their influence on you—people will always enjoy it and even start returning the courtesy.

Communication is such a basic a skillset, that most of us don’t learn it unless we take a course on it. Follow these tips and you’ll start to see a big difference in the way you are communicating with people and how receptive they are to your ideas.

Which communication tip is your style? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Benjamin Fishel is co-creator of Project Monkey Mind – where he helps young professionals and solopreneuers channel their passions, improve their mindset, and lead a world-changing life. Do you want to get more out of your morning in less time? You can download our FREE eBook: Morning Mastery: the simple 20 minute routine for long-lasting energy, laser-sharp focus, and stress free living.

Success Advice

How Your Friends Determine Whether You Succeed or Not

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Can anyone do without having friends? We all have our friends, we share ideas with them, talk together, have fun, and fight. Yes, that’s the baseline of friendship. But, do you know that aside from you, your friends can determine whether you achieve success or not?

There are two things in friendship which are the ability to ”love” and the ability to “influence”. This means you are loved and you are influenced. How do your friends affect your success in life? How are they one of the biggest deciding factors of your success? Let’s find out.

What type of friends do you keep? 

First, what type of friends do you keep? Who do you call your best friend? There are two different kinds of friends, good friends, and bad ones. A lot of people have lost their pathway to success and some have also found their road to success all because of the friends they keep, the people they mingle with. 

Who is your best friend? Answer carefully. Having a best friend means you find each other compatible and understanding. Analyze who your best friend is. If your best friend has not motivated you to do something positive, if who you call your bestie has never given you positive advice, lastly if your best friend has never informed and advised you on your shortcomings, then you don’t have a best friend.

This quote tells us “birds of the same feather flock together”. Countless people have changed from their good nature into a bad one all because of friends. One thing to note is, “negative people move with negative aura”. If your best friend is filled with negativity inside-out then you will surely be affected by his/her negative aura.

They influence your success with positivity or negativity 

The friends you keep can either influence you with positivity or negativity because your friends have the power to change your kind of person completely. 

This is how your friends influence you:

  1. They influence you indirectly with what they do
  2. They influence you directly by teaching and giving you advice 

Yes, that is how they influence you. For instance, you watch a movie and you like the way the actor walks. The question is if you truly like the way the actor walks, won’t you try to imitate the actor? Of course, you will.

Just the way you imitate the actor is the same way your friends can influence you with their character. However, the funny part is, they don’t have to teach you to do things like them. You just find yourself imitating and copying them gradually.

An important question to ask is, are you imitating a good friend or a bad one? If you imitate a good friend then you will be good, but if you imitate a bad person, you will surely become a bad person.

Everyone wants to succeed, a good friend will always teach, enlighten, and motivate you for success. A bad friend will only motivate you to do evil things (smoking, drinking, fight, envy,).

And you should know that things like that are a great enemy of success and even of God. So, if you have these bad elements in your life, how will you achieve success? There is no way!

And also, they can teach and advise you directly. But, what do your friends teach you? When you ask them for advice do they inspire you positively or teach you the bad stuff.? A lot of people have regretted lifelong decisions just by listening to the advice of friends. 

The company you keep has the power to influence and change you. Never forget that a positive influence will teach, motivate, and brush you up for success. While a negative influence will inspire you to become a bad person, change your good nature, and leave you with regrets in the end.

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The 3 Step Process to Building a Profitable Pitch

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As a communication coach, one of the top questions entrepreneurs ask me is how to deliver a winning pitch to potential investors. They want to know if there’s a magic formula to get an investor to say yes and buy into their dream and their business. (more…)

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The 4 Pillars of Wealth and Abundance

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Have you ever wondered what the formula for a wealthy and abundant life is? Many people have. Lots has been written about the subject of wealth creation and living an abundant life. It was a breaking point in my journey and pursuit of success when I found out that there is a clear path to achieve success in life. Thanks to those who have shared their journey, we can clearly see and follow the principles of prosperity. (more…)

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Here Are 4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Podcast, Youtube Channel or Online Show

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Confidence comes from a place of strong understanding of self. After close to three years on radio, I’ve grown from a shy introvert to a shy introvert with an extrovert persona. When the mic is turned on, I can channel a version of myself that some say is attractive, strong, and of course, confident but it wasn’t always this way.

What I want to share with you is what I discovered on this journey into broadcast that you can apply to your life, your ventures, and your personal development. This doesn’t require any fancy gear. It does require a leap of faith on your part because once you go down the road of media; it can change your life.

1. Perceived Expertise

When you go to a doctor, you expect their knowledge will guide them to a solution to your problems. When you have a show, you become your listeners’ doctor. For all the multiple thousands, maybe millions, of YouTube channels, podcasts, and user-created content in the world, each person that gets behind a mic takes a position on their passion, their opinions, and their themes.

They challenge the status quo for the benefit of their listeners in hopes to entertain and educate. With consistency on your side, those fans place you on a platform and give you permission to influence them.

2. Global Acknowledgement

One of the benefits to increasing confidence is when you receive thank you notes from people you may never meet. The feeling of enriching someone’s life from halfway around the globe, provides validation you’re enhancing someone else’s life with your wisdom and your wit.

The very first time I was told I was making a difference in someone’s life in a country other than my own, I felt like I caused massive impact that transcends my circle of influence. When you experience just how much you can cause impact and it comes back to you, it’ll change your worldview.

“Be grateful for what you have and stop complaining – it bores everybody else, does you no good, and doesn’t solve any problems.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Backed By Numbers

One of the most exciting ways to measure success is to quantify your growth. It’s not enough to just broadcast. Having subscribers and downloads helps to know, numerically, how well you’re doing. Word of caution. This can be a way to set yourself up for distress because of number envy but if you understand what the numbers mean; you can control the narrative of the numbers.

The major number that makes most people smile is 10,000. I’d advise it to be 1. Here’s why. As you grow in your industry, so does your reach. If you learned that the one person that subscribed totally changed for the better because of you, wouldn’t that be worth the effort?

4. Effective Communication

While it’s not talked about much, having a show is documentation. You create a dynamic account of your life, your industry, and the pulse on what’s important simply by having a show. When you find a channel to improve your communication skills, you demand attention and people will listen to you. You become more trusted as a leader and people will follow you once they believe you can lead them to their wants and needs.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Tony Robbins

These insights have helped many people become leaders and, ultimately, move others to their best selves. It’s worked for me and I hope it works for you. At the end of the day, it’s all about showing up and showing out.

Have you ever thought about having a radio show? If so, what would you talk about? Let us below!

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