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10 Winning Habits of Highly Charismatic People That You Can Adopt Too

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I had often wondered how some people just seem to have it all together. These people are good at communicating, energizing and motivating others. It is something we truly cannot define, but some people just have it. It’s called charisma. Natural charisma could lose its impact especially when you add familiarity.

However, some people are remarkably charismatic. They cultivate and maintain great relationships, consistently and positively influencing the people around them; making them feel better about themselves and as such everyone wants to be around them.

Charisma tends to increase your chances of being successful in any area of your life. Science has been fascinated by the concept and found that charisma is a quality everyone can develop; not necessarily an inborn trait.

By examining the traits that charismatic people exhibit, we can certainly grow to become charismatic ourselves.

According to Ronald Riggio PhD, professor of leadership and organizational psychology at Claremont McKenna College, Charisma has three main ingredients:

  • Expressiveness – A knack for striking up conversations spontaneously and easily conveying feelings.
  • Control – The ability to fine-tune your persona to fit the mood and social makeup of any group.
  • Sensitivity – A gift for listening.

 

Here are 10 typical traits that we know can be found in charismatic people:

1. Confidence

There is a certain confidence that charismatic people exude. According to the Harvard Business review, confidence can be so alluring that people are willing to trust anyone who expresses it. Researchers have noted that showing confidence is more dominant in establishing trust than past performance. Charismatic people literally light up a room with confidence when they walk in.

 

2. They are attentive and listen to others

Charismatic individuals know how to make people feel valued. People like to be around them because of this. This is because they’ve trained themselves to be attentive to people whom they interact with.

Simple habits like asking questions, maintaining eye contact, smiling, responsiveness, verbal or nonverbal cues, are some of the things they do actively. It’s not surprising that studies have found that eye contact heavily influences likability, trustworthiness, and attractiveness. Listening shows that they care a lot more than offering advice.

“Charisma is not just saying hello. It’s dropping what you’re doing to say hello.” – Robert Brault

 

3. They’re passionate and show it

Charismatic people tend to be quite passionate about what they believe in. This passion motivates people around them to act.

Behavioral Science has shown that strong emotions can be contagious. A prominent researcher in this area, Dr. Elaine Hatfield, has conducted several studies showing how people “grab” the emotions of others.

For example, if you have a friend who is always critical about everyone, you’ll soon find yourself to be critical of other people. Likewise, being around someone who’s passionate and optimistic is likely to inspire you to think and behave that way also.

 

4. They are approachable

Charismatic people are often seen as warm and approachable. Most people would rather get to trust and get closer to you if they perceive you to be warm. 

According to Dr. Robert Zajonic, facial muscles contract to produce a smile that allows for increased blood flows to the brain which lowers the brain temperature and produces feelings of pleasure and happiness.

Studies have also shown that smiling is linked to how approachable and competent someone is. You want to hone your charismatic skills, then smile.

 

5. No self importance

Charismatic people have no bone of self-importance in their bodies. They are simple, easily relatable, with no airs.

This doesn’t mean they are not knowledgeable. In fact, they know quite a lot, and are kind in dispensing the information that they have. The only people that can be impressed by self- importance are those who are pretentious, and act self-important also.

 

6. They have a cause

Throughout the 20th century, sociologist Max Weber’s study of charisma says that a charismatic person has a clear vision for the future and boldly advances towards it. They are people who talk about ideas that are bigger than themselves.

An example of this kind of person would be the late Steve Jobs, co-founder of Apple, who on recruiting Pepsi CEO John Sculley, pointedly asked if he wanted to sell sugared water for the rest of his life, or if he wanted a chance to change the world?

 

7. Genuine interest in others

Confident and charismatic people usually prefer to shine the spotlight on others. They motivate people. Telling others how much of a good job they’ve been doing is essential.

Not only will people who are drawn to you appreciate your praise, but they will also appreciate the fact that you pay attention to what they’re doing. It brings a sense of accomplishment to them. Then they’ll feel a little more accomplished and more important.  

In other words, they give credit where credit is due. If they are recognized for a success, they shower the praises on everyone else and empower people without expecting anything in return. Conversely, if anything goes wrong, they aren’t afraid to take the blame.

“There is no better friendship booster than the ability to listen. The ability to show genuine interest in others an admirable quality of a true friend.” – Phil Callaway

 

8. Belief in themselves

Even though people have doubts about what they are doing and their abilities, charismatic people don’t allow those doubts to influence their interactions with people whom they motivate.

 

9. They encourage self disclosure

Charismatic people ask insightful questions which make others share things about themselves. Studies from Harvard researchers, prove that sharing information about ourselves impacts our brains.

It’s also confirmed that our brains are literally wired to enjoy sharing information about ourselves. Being charismatic is less about you and more about how you make others feel.

 

10. They are generous

According to Professor Grant at the Wharton school of business, there are three types of people; the taker, the matcher and the giver. Charismatic people are givers and altruistic. They give without looking for anything in return.

Check out our video below for habits of highly charismatic people! Share this video!

What habits are you going to adopt today to start being more charismatic? Leave your thoughts below!

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Brandy Whitfield

    Jun 10, 2017 at 1:56 am

    I see some of these signs within myself! This article is very helpful and I love how you touched on having a genuine interest in others because that definitely is key! It goes with the saying ” While going up the ladder help others as well”. I believe in finding a greater purpose, a purpose bigger than ourselves.

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3 Simple Hacks That Can Recharge Your Willpower and Help You Perform Better at Work

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How many times did you wake up feeling like you could conquer the world? You set ambitious goals for the day, you put on your best attire and walked out the door with a big smile on your face but eventually, life took over. Traffic, emails, work, family, and everything else you have around slowly but steadily started to drain your energy and made you feel exhausted.

You run out of battery, and the only solution that seemed viable was to rely on more caffeine. When that stopped working, all the temptations around you started to look much more appealing, and that sense of drive and commitment you had before slowly faded away. This is you running out of willpower.

Willpower: what is it? Why is it limited?

The American Psychology Association describes willpower as “the ability to resist short-term temptations in order to meet long-term goals.” In the book “The Willpower Instinct”, Dr. Kelly McGonigal, explains how every person’s willpower is limited, and slowly depletes throughout the day. The more “willpower challenges” you face, the quicker your reserve drains. Dr. McGonigal divided the different types of willpower challenges you might encounter in three categories:

  • I will: We face this type of challenge whenever we should do something, but we simply don’t feel like getting it done right now.
  • I won’t: We face this challenge when we try to resist temptation, or we try to keep cool in stressful situations.
  • I want: This is a particular type of challenge where we keep track of our long term goals, dreams, and desires. In this instance, we feel like we should take action right now to come one step closer to the goal. 

It’s easy to recognize it when you face a willpower challenge because you literally “feel it in your body.” Imagine being really hungry and walking in front of a bakery. The sight and the smell of pastries quickly triggers an “I won’t” type of challenge, and it takes a severe amount of effort and energy to walk away.

Every time you manage to win one of those challenges, a little bit of your willpower reserve gets used. The more challenges you face daily, the harder it will be to stay true to your goals.

Can you train or recharge your willpower?

A growing body of research suggests that willpower should be considered a muscle. To strengthen it, you should exercise it regularly, but you should not overwork it. Therefore, we shouldn’t try to “be good” at all times. Instead, we should learn how to relax and recharge our willpower.

The general advice on how to improve willpower involves sleep, proper nutrition, and regular exercise. This broad and general recommendation is often not downright applicable by most, because it consists of changing various daily habits. Luckily, three very effective hacks have been discovered, that have an immediate effect on our willpower and take just a few minutes to apply.

Here are the 3 ways to refill your willpower reserves:

1. Focused breathing

Breathing, when done correctly, can stimulate the release of calming hormones while reducing the release of stress hormones like cortisol and catecholamines. To make this effective, you should deeply and slowly inhale through the nose for at least five seconds. Fill your belly with air first, then your chest, and when there’s no more space for air, still try to do tiny inhalations through the nose.

You should feel a pulling sensation around your neck and trapezius muscles. Once your lungs are full, try to hold the breath for five seconds, then slowly exhale through the mouth for at least five seconds. If you repeat this process ten to twenty times, you should feel dramatically more relaxed. Use this method several times a day, especially when you’re experiencing high levels of stress or anxiety.

2. Reward yourself when you accomplish a micro goal

According to a recent study, frequent instant rewards can boost motivation, and therefore, willpower. Creating your own reward system can help you to accomplish your to-do list, and also resist temptations. Since every individual has different tastes, you should come up with creative ideas about the small and frequent rewards you will give yourself upon winning any willpower challenge.

You can see this hack in practice in Apps like the popular Duolinguo, where after completing each lesson you get presented with a chance to open a treasure chest. This rewarding system seems to keep the users much more likely to keep learning new lessons.

3. Taking cold showers

Your body has an autonomic response to cold water. Getting into a cold shower is a difficult (but minor) willpower challenge on its own. As I previously mentioned, winning a willpower challenge strengthens your willpower muscle. Having a morning cold shower, on top of having multiple health benefits, will set you up for a positive winning streak of further challenges.

High performance is the sum of many small habits. Successful people don’t have an unlimited reserve of willpower, but they do have a set of daily rituals that made them succeed. These three hacks are some of the most effective techniques to develop willpower, but some of them may not fit every individual. You should try to find the perfect mix of daily practices that best fits your lifestyle and likes, so that you can strengthen your willpower muscle and perform better at work.

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