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What I Learned In My 20’s: The Advice That Will Give You Massive Success

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Lessons From My 20's On Addicted2Success

Your 20’s are one of the best times of your life, but actually, your whole life should be that way. As I hit another birthday, which means nothing to me, I reflect on what I have learned in my 20’s with the hope that people from around the world can learn from my experience.

My life can be divided up into three phases so far: the music phase, the entrepreneur phase, and the phase I am in now to inspire the world through personal development and entrepreneurship. In a nutshell, that’s it.

When you chunk it down these three phases of life, have taught me so much, and I promise you there is some real value if you take the time to read to the end of the article.

Below are the 10 life lessons from my 20’s that will lead you to massive success:

 

1. Success is rare

My number one tip without a doubt is that success is rare. That’s right, most people will fail miserably in life and will never know why. I don’t say that to get you down; I say it because it doesn’t have to be that way for you.

My twenties showed me what the world wanted me to believe was success, but I learned in the last few years that this was all wrong. When you’re happy, passionate and filled with purpose, only then will you be successful. Everything outside of these three areas is BS and will guarantee you of failure.

 

2. Purpose equals success (find your freakin why)

Every day in your 20’s you wake up and do a series of things. When you do those things and have no idea why you’re doing them, you become like a zombie. You operate your mind on autopilot and become numb the majority of emotions. Any emotion that you have is further numbed through alcohol, junk food, drugs, mindless entertainment, your phone, and outside stimulants.

When you find your why your 20’s can setup the rest of your life. If you don’t, that’s fine, but at least try and get in the direction of your why. If you end up nowhere near the direction of your why in your 20’s, your probability of failure increases. That said, you can change your life at any moment in time.

 

3. You are only three contacts away from a global influencer

It’s easy to think that it can be hard to reach people like Richard Branson, but it’s really not. Throughout my twenties, I have learned that we are around three contacts away from reaching anyone we want. Global influencers all have big networks, and all you need to do is find someone who is close enough to them.

If your reason for reaching out is compelling enough, and you try and give value back to the person who is going to introduce you, then you will have no problems getting a hold of a global influencer. Make sure, though that you use the opportunity to do something amazing in the world!

 

4. Anything can be learned

In our teens we are told that we have to learn a specialty and that we are then stuck with it for the rest of our life, so we should choose our education and career wisely. THIS IS A MYTH! Anything can be learned at any stage in life and thanks to the internet; anyone can have whatever knowledge they want.

“It’s not the learning, but the action we take from the learning, that really matters. I would almost go as far as saying the less you know about something, the more you are likely to succeed” – Tim Denning

Naivety is a great thing that causes disruption and creates companies like Uber.

Forget about how hard you think something is and pick up the basics so you can learn in your 20’s what you will make your life’s purpose about.

 

5. No amount of money will make you happy

We are somehow led to believe in our 20’s that money will solve all our problems. What I learned in my 20’s through being an entrepreneur is that money means nothing. It’s what you do with your resources such as money that will give you massive success.

The fewer resources you have, the more creative with your approach you have to be. Creativity equals entrepreneurship, which equals starting a business, which equals purpose. Purpose equals fulfilment.

So get your fancy luxury car and give it to a friend!!! That’s right; you will feel better by doing this and save lots of money in depreciation. The people that you know who brag about the money they have are doing so because they are insecure. Money gives them status, which allows them to hide from life.

 

6. We all want attention

Whether we are willing to admit it or not, we all want attention even me. The difference is that I believe we should want attention (eyeballs) to do something good with it and inspire others. Most of what you see people do on social media is for attention.

Attention seekers without a good enough reason for the attention will ultimately fail. In your 20’s your goal should be to build some level of influence so you can use it in a positive way and create value for others. As you create value, you will feel fulfilled. Then, sit back and be grateful for what you have created.

 

7. Change is guaranteed

The next few years are going to be the years of biggest change thanks to our friend (my best friend) technology. Your 20’s need to set you up for life to be able to deal with change like it’s not a problem. When you see change; tragedy, failure or loss, as a bad thing, you will reward yourself with massive pain. Pain equals unhappiness followed my negative emotions that create a toxic inner world.

If you create a toxic inner world, then your outer world becomes miserable. Use your 20’s to try lots of things and to become comfortable with how remarkable change can be.

“Use significant change in your life as a turning point towards success and see it as a doorway to everything you ever wanted” – Tim Denning

Walking away from a business for me was a massive change. If I hadn’t done so, then I wouldn’t be here right now writing this advice for you with a big fat smile on my face. I would never have been able to understand my true purpose and find my ideal happiness. That’s how crucial change is for you.

 

8. Everyone’s has got their problems

It’s easy in our 20’s to be tricked into thinking the people around us don’t have the same problems we do. The reality is that everyone has the same problems in their 20’s and no one, just like me, has got any clue what the hell they are doing.

The whole point of your 20’s is to understand that problems are common, and no one is perfect. Your sexy friend on Instagram with the flawless skin, nice car, and that’s covered in tattoos is probably more unhappy than you. Tattoos can often be a sign of unresolved pain and the past. Live in the present and stop looking at your pain that’s tattooed on your body, or your mind, or both.

 

9. Look after the inside or the outside will suck

In my 20’s I learned later on that success is about the inside of you. By inside I mean your health and what you put into your body each day, and your mind. When you conquer your health and unlock the power of your mind, you get two vital things: boundless amounts of energy and a clarity and focus that not many people have.

How do you look after these two parts of you? You feed your body alkaline foods and liquids, and you feed your mind positive thoughts, emotions, and information. The combination of these three things will set you on a path for massive success and help make your 20’s phenomenal.

 

10. Stop Giving A *&^%$!

My final lesson from my twenties is to stop giving a *&^%$! about things that don’t matter. Stuff is going to go wrong, and people are going to judge you no matter what. Instead of caring about everything that happens, focus on caring about things that matter to you like your purpose or your passion.

In your 20’s, the more you get distracted by the little things that don’t matter and that you can’t change, the less time you will have to change the world with your sheer brilliance that is locked away inside of you. We are all brilliant if we will just get out of our own way and let our light shine brightly.

 

***Final Thought***

Even though I have passed another birthday, I don’t care because I feel younger than ever before. Time will always pass by, but I refuse to let that time be wasted. We all have a limited amount of time on this planet so forget whether you are in your 20’s, 30’s, 40’s or 100’s and concentrate on what matters.

I feel like I will always be like Peter Pan and live forever because my world will live on through generations and yours can too if you focus your mind on the right activities. Put the cell phone down, bring yourself back to the present, and enjoy life man!

What are or what were your 20’s about for you? What did you learn? Let me know in the comments section below or on my website timdenning.net or my Facebook.

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared hundreds of thousands of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around success, personal development, motivation, and entrepreneurship. During the day Tim works with the most iconic tech companies in the world, as an adviser, to assist them in expanding into Australia. By night, Tim coaches his students on the principles of personal development and the fundamentals of entrepreneurship. You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

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23 Comments

23 Comments

  1. Rawlings Lyson

    Nov 29, 2016 at 9:28 pm

    lm passionate about business thank you for the article

  2. Cecelia Jernegan

    Nov 17, 2016 at 1:38 pm

    Great article. I am a 65 year young retired grandma and you nail it! Good job. Keep up the great work.

  3. Apoorv Sharma

    Nov 12, 2016 at 12:07 pm

    Very inspiring article Tim , and very much true . I have observed most of the things mentioned here .
    I believe everyone should aim in their 20 s to be the best version of themselves and improve on daily basis. I won’t say i’m “killing it” in this aim, but i’m not ready to give up until i become the person i want to be.

    Such Article , like yours motivates me to skyrocket my enthusiasm and double my efforts .
    Keep up the great work . Cheers .

  4. Rob Malone

    May 23, 2016 at 5:43 pm

    Great article. I wish I would have learned all this in my twenties.

    I think you point about money can’t buy happiness is huge. People just don’t understand this until they have money and think “why am still miserable”. It is finding your “why” and pursuing it that will bring happiness.

    Also your perspective on tattoos was really interesting. I always felt that tattoos represented something hidden down deep and I find your analogy very plausible.

    Thanks for sharing the article.

    • Tim Denning

      May 27, 2016 at 9:37 pm

      Rob thanks for the kind words. Money is always something that mankind will struggle with but I hope the message eventually get’s out there – money will not make you happy. Glad you liked the tattoo’s piece of the article. I am not someone that likes tattoos but I respect people’s right to choose what they do with their body.

  5. shahwc

    May 22, 2016 at 3:39 am

    Thanks for your article Tim! This is really inspiring as me myself in my 20’s. Hope my 20’s will bring something in my life and my family.

    • Tim Denning

      May 27, 2016 at 9:35 pm

      Shah I am sure your 20’s will be successful. Make sure you enjoy them and don’r look back. Thanks for reading!

  6. Kat

    May 18, 2016 at 2:55 pm

    I just turned 20 and graduated with a Marketing degree! Deciding what to do now is driving me crazy! Thanks for this article!!

    • Tim Denning

      May 20, 2016 at 3:27 am

      No problem Kat. Best of luck with your marketing degree and don’t overthink it.

  7. Aleksandra

    May 16, 2016 at 10:21 pm

    I’m 24 now and I must say that this article is like winning in a lottery. Thank you Tim for this great motivation and inspiration to continue to reach my goals and dreams and just enjoy life, focus on present and be happy and wealthy.
    I have many small and big goals for myself and I know that this is a great period to successfully reach them all!
    Stay cool and I’m waiting for a new great article from you! 🙂

    • Tim Denning

      May 17, 2016 at 12:43 am

      Wow thanks Aleksandra for the massive compliment. Plenty more articles to come so stay tuned.

  8. Toño

    May 16, 2016 at 5:35 pm

    As I have approached my another B’day as well month ago I can tell my 20s have been the craziest time and full of events I would never wished or imagined. I haven’t achieved any success during that time, but through all the struggle, hustle and tragedy I was able to grow and become a better, new person. It was a preparation for a big journey I am now. If to describe my 20s in one sentence it has to be my favourite quote by Thomas Edison: ‘I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work’ 🙂

    Now I can take those lessons of yours to turn my 30s into something big. I don’t count the age, as Time is a man-made concept which most often does not define thyself.

    You’ve listed amazing lessons which will help me on my journey, and I’m going to use them well. I want to highlight those lessons I will the most attachemnt with at the moment:

    #1. The very first lesson. Success is rare, and that not everyone will reach it, taste it and experience it. It got me deep. I am still don’t quite know yet what success really is and whether I’m going to achieve it. You are right about it rarity, and that most people will fail, I’ve been there and know what it is and it gives me another reason to appreciate things more and value my time. I have to define success first, and I am still not quite there yet. I may never learn it, but I will never give up.

    The next lesson is to find your freaking why, man. Exactly! Just few days ago I have been thinking exact same thing, like what is the reason behind most of my daily actions and routine and how to overcome some stress if you really have to do something? Find you WHY, that’s how!
    And then your article comes up with like the same line. Yeah, eyeballs. Amazing!

    For a long time I was convinced you should be young, talented and awesome to do special and particular things, but slowly I realized it does not have to be that. I have been limiting myself out for so long that it seems like I just started to re-learn some regular stuff now. Taking another lesson, anything can be learned, I now can fully agree with you. We have to try multiple things out to find out what it’s like and what we are here to do, and it doesn’t have to be complicated. Back to the Monk WHo Sold His Ferrari story, I have been emptying my cup so I can fill it with new knowledge.

    Oh, and I have watched ‘In pursuit of Happyness’ (this time I spelled it right) as I’ve finally found it in English (surprisingly through my old xbox 360 account!). I think this movie reflect perfectly well on the sunject and on some of the lessons of yours. Thank you SO very much for suggestion, my friend, it was amazing experience and I enjoyed this movie so much. Still feel the emotion, what a beautiful story and what an amazing actors play. I will show it to my sister, she will greatly appreciate it I am sure!

    My gratitude and much love for this article, Tim, you tought me well! Speak with you soon, have a great day and stay healthy!

    • Tim Denning

      May 17, 2016 at 12:46 am

      Toño we always seem to be on a similar journey my friend. I love how you practice what you learn and the fact you are beginning to empty your cup. The Pursuit Of Happyness is my all time favourite movie. It’s what success is all about. The struggles are where all the beauty lies and it’s what will make you successful .

      Keep in touch my friend.

  9. Sophia

    May 16, 2016 at 2:32 am

    Hi Tim,
    Wished you wrote this peace a decade ago and I had a chance to read it. I would have changed scripts that were installed by my culture, surrounding, and myself.
    I would add additional point to the list: choose carefully who are you friends and how much your family can influence you. On subconscious level we always want to fit, be excepted by others, and be part of a tribe. Our social environment affects our mindset, which directly result in our choices for actions. Unless we have good role models, we will fall in trap of following tribe habits which may not be in our personal best interests.
    Thanks again

    • Tim Denning

      May 16, 2016 at 4:52 am

      Sophia I wish I wrote this a decade ago as well…lol, although it’s taken me a while to gain the knowledge Your points are spot on and your environment is very important although not as important as your internal environment that governs everything you do.

      Thanks for reading Sophia.

  10. france

    May 15, 2016 at 9:08 am

    thank you for this inspirational article.greets from grom germany

    • Tim Denning

      May 15, 2016 at 10:33 am

      Not a problem France and thanks for reading 🙂

  11. Rayon

    May 15, 2016 at 7:30 am

    Hey Tim,

    Firstly this line “I would almost go as far as saying the less you know about something, the more you are likely to succeed.” I agree with this 100%.
    In fact a friend and I were having a conversation about this just the other day. We both came to the conclusion that knowing too much sometimes hinder one from getting off the ground and doing the epic. Sometimes even to the point where you’ve dug so deep that you talk yourself out of a very good idea.

    Next, “The fewer resources you have, the more creative with your approach you have to be.” This is a must.
    I remember in high school’s Technical Drawing I had one pencil that I used for every type of line and my drawing table was an enamel stove top that I drew on at home, however, those drawings always stood out to the point where students wanted me to draw for them.
    We can’t allow lack of resources to hold us back. Use what is available to do what we must, eventually all the resources required will show up and whenever they break down and they usually do, working without them won’t be an issue.

    Lastly, “Walking away from a business for me was a massive change.” I’m curious to know how you managed this. Would love to hear more.

    You’ve dropped great points here and this article is definitely worth sharing. Thanks for another great post man.

    Rayon.

    • Tim Denning

      May 15, 2016 at 10:33 am

      Rayon thank you for sharing what you took away from the post. I love your story about your technical drawing experience it highlights my point perfectly.

      The part where I mention the business is something I am happy to share with you. Feel free to drop me a line on Facebook or through my website.

  12. Chipokota

    May 15, 2016 at 6:27 am

    Wow. Beautiful article. As I turn 28 at the end of the year I have so much to reflect on. I couldn’t have read a better article of encouragement that I have lived my twenties not too badly! And should continue making the most out of life! Biggest of all for that comment that I am just three contacts away from a global influencer. I agree totally and I see it all the time in my life! The world is not as big as it seems. Let’s do this!

    • Tim Denning

      May 15, 2016 at 7:16 am

      Chipokota glad to see you are also doing some reflecting. I’m sure you have done fine thus far in life. The global influencer point will serve you well my friend if you use it. Take care!

  13. Gabriel DoCarmo

    May 14, 2016 at 9:51 pm

    Great article Tim, thank you so much for writing. For me, my 20s are freakin awesome! I’m extremely happy with the man I’m becoming and the direction I’m headed in life. I’ve learned that You determine your Reality 100%, nothing happens to you everything happens BECAUSE of You. If you want something you go get it, period. Nobody is coming to the rescue. We live in the best Possible time in the history of the world and country with huge amount of abundance and Opportunity (US) I’m turning 22 next week and looking forward to learning much much more! Life is Awesome
    -Gabriel DoCarmo

    • Tim Denning

      May 14, 2016 at 10:56 pm

      Thanks for the inspiring message and I’m sure the rest of your 20’s will be outstanding. Technology and the internet are brining us so many opportunities. Exciting times!

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Success Advice

5 Ways to Think Yourself Into Mind Blowing Results From Globally Renowned Leaders

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deep thought

Many wonder why someone who’s less qualified is achieving greater success even though you’re smarter, work harder, or even have more influential connections. The only way someone succeeds is by thinking correctly. It doesn’t matter who you know, what school you attended, or what grades you got; all that matters are your thoughts. Both men and women around the world have been telling people “the secret” to success for hundreds of years. It’s time to listen.

Here are five tactics to begin today:

1. Writing Goals the Napoleon Hill Way

Thinking yourself into mind blowing results starts with the end in mind. Athletes know exactly what their goal is and how to earn the points to win. Life’s exactly the same.  In nearly every Napoleon Hill book, he lays out a goal achieving formula which has helped millions around the world. By following this, you will accomplish something you currently believe is impossible.

Start by writing a clear statement of your desire, then formulate a clear plan to attain it. You’ll also need to know what you plan on giving up in return. Set a definite time limit. Everything you wrote down, memorize it and repeat it to yourself often. It’s imperative you express gratitude towards receiving the results you’re still working for. Be grateful you achieved your desired outcomes long before you actually materialize them into your world.

“If you cannot do great things yourself, remember that you may do small things in a great way.” – Napoleon Hill

2. Creating Your Mental Image How Bob Proctor Teaches

In Bob Proctor’s’ book, You Were Born Rich, he titled Chapter 3, “The Image Maker” because we think in pictures. Our thoughts are like movie clips being projected on the screens of our minds; control the pictures, control the outcomes.  It’s vital to manage our thoughts and expel the ones that don’t serve us. Knowing this, you’re now the ‘mental architect’ of your life, of your destiny!

Once you have your desired outcome, it’s time to put that image on the screen of your mind. See yourself already in possession of what you desire. Clearly watch yourself living it, hearing the sounds and feeling the feelings you’ll experience.

A powerful question to ask to know which moment should be on the screen of your mind is, “what’s the last thing that needs to happen in order for me to know I’ve achieved the result I’m after?” This is the moment to focus on!

3. Allow Dr. David Schwartz to Give Yourself a Daily Pep-Talk

Start thinking more of yourself through self-praise. You’ll begin to discover how much bigger and stronger you feel when you upgrade your thinking habits. In Dr. David Schwartz’s book, The Magic of Thinking Big, he provides you with a daily technique. Constantly reminding yourself that you’re top-notch by using his “Sell-Yourself-to-Yourself 60 Second Commercial.”

Developing the “commercial” is as easy as writing down your assets and points of superiority. What’ll separate you from the herd is practicing your “commercial” out loud in front of a mirror once a day with enthusiasm and determination. Lastly, read it silently many times throughout the day as a constant reminder of your greatness. Just like a written goal, keep this with you at all times. It’s a great mental tool to regain enthusiasm and determination after the inevitable setback.

4. Experience Unlimited Power Like Tony Robbins

Have you heard about Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP)? It’s the study of success and how to emulate it; it’s the language of the mind and how to create concise results. From the many learnings gathered from both Tony Robbins and the study of NLP, controlling your state of mind is one thing that will drastically change the results you’re currently producing.

In his book, Unlimited Power, Tony Robbins gifted us with the technique, “memory management.” This is linking an emotion to a memory which instantly elicits that empowering feeling. Simply know your arsenal of positive memories to think about when you need that extra umph.

Successful people gain access to their most resourceful emotions on a consistent basis, you can too. What’s great about the mind is that they don’t even need to be real memories. Daydreaming about your fantasy life will do the trick too!

“People who succeed at the highest level are not lucky; they’re doing something differently than everyone else.” – Tony Robbins

5. Think Positive as if You Were Norman Vincent Peale

Believing in yourself is vital to succeed, but not crucial to begin. The path to attainment is by forming faith and expectancy that what you desire is going to happen. In Norman Vincent Peale’s book, The Power of Positive Thinking, he wrote a chapter for each of these important necessities; believing and expecting. By not having both of these right now, or even just one of them, that shouldn’t stop you from anything!

There’s an undeniable cure for both. To believe in yourself and have the full expectation that what you want will come to pass, the only tactic out there are autosuggestions, commonly known as affirmations.

Developing statements in the positive, present tense and repeating them thousands of times a day, you’ll reprogram your subconscious mind to a success-filled mindset. By convincing your subconscious to believe in your end game, soon enough, you’ll begin to expect it; just like you expect to go to sleep tonight.

Since our minds are the most powerful force in all of creation, it’s time to start using it to its fullest potential. Start today by writing your goal the Napoleon Hill way!

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Success Advice

2 Secret Roads to Success – Why Some People Have It All and How You Can Too

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road to success

Have you wondered how some people seem to have it all – the 6-figure pay check, a healthy and fit body and amazing relationships? On the other hand, others are successful in one aspect of our lives (perhaps we are happy with our careers) but there’s always something that’s missing – that strong body, that perfect someone or living a meaningful life.

I’ve personally experienced having a successful career but failed at having a healthy and strong body. When I finally succeeded at getting and staying healthy, I realized that there are two completely different approaches, both of which need to be mastered to find success in life – the goal-driven approach and the process-driven approach.

The Goal-Driven Approach

A goal-driven approach is one in which our goals themselves, are sufficient to motivate us to act until we achieve them. This works well for:

  1. Short-term goals lasting a few days or a few weeks, where we can see the end in sight and push ourselves to get there.
  2. Goals that are usually within or just outside our comfort zone.
  3. Goals that have some certainty of success at the end. For example, working overnight and acing the client presentation the next morning makes us feel proud of our achievement and gets us recognition from our boss.

This approach inherently rewards speed, agility and short bursts of intense work. We end up relying on quick wins or successes which make the task worth it and help us feel motivated to achieve our goals.

Most of us are very adept at using this approach because we’ve grown up in environments, traditional education and companies, which operate this way. Schools and universities set exams and corporate jobs require us to complete tasks upon which we get good grades or promotions.

When the Goal-Driven Approach Doesn’t Work

What a goal-driven approach doesn’t teach us though is how to approach long-term goals like staying healthy, having meaningful relationships or building our careers around our purpose in life.

  1. These goals are usually so big and so long-term that we don’t fully understand all the steps to reach them.
  2. They don’t have any immediate reward associated with them so our motivation to chase them decreases after the initial burst of inspiration. For example, it’s impossible to lose weight and keep it off by just eating healthy for a week.
  3. Because they are so long-term, any future action of ours can completely wipe out the gains made in the beginning of the process which is even more de-motivating. For example, a week of eating healthy can be wiped out by one night of bingeing.
  4. There is also no artificial sense of urgency like deadlines -so we need to find the motivation internally to engage in the task every day. If we ever try to impose timelines on these tasks, it only stresses us out and we compensate by completely sabotaging ourselves like eating an entire pack of cookies one fine night exhausted from a week of eating too little.

“If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.” – Yogi Berra

The Process-Driven Approach

The process-driven approach breaks down our big goals into minute goals and creates a habit to execute these minute goals regularly.

Putting such a habit into place is simple. Just follow these four steps:

  1. Break down your big vision into multiple long-term goals all of which have to work together to make your big vision come true. For example, for your big goal of feeling healthy and fit, you may break it down into eating healthier, exercising regularly and sleeping more.
  2. Pick one of the goals to focus on, ideally the one you think will have the biggest payoff.
  3. Break this goal down into a series of simple activities that you can do without much effort. For example, let’s say you picked eating healthier as your priority goal. One of the activities that might be sabotaging you is your regular McDonald’s dinner on the way back from work. A simple activity that can replace this is to stop driving by McDonald’s if it’s triggering your craving and take a different route back home instead.  This might take a little bit of willpower on the first day but as you get used to the new route over a couple of weeks, it’ll become an automatic habit.
  4. Once the first activity feels like a normal part of your day, stack on the second activity and so on. Similarly, once you’ve achieved the first goal, stack on the second, third and remaining goals to reach your long-term vision.

How to Succeed with the Process-Driven Approach

Though this seems simple in theory, there are two emotional and mindset changes needed to succeed with this method.

The first is to be patient – instead of focusing on the big shiny dream, measure progress against the habit that you’re trying to cultivate. Accept that seeing the big vision come true takes months and sometimes years. Our biggest Achilles heel is impatience and while this works well in academia and work, it backfires in building health and relationships because we end up taking short cuts that harm us long term.

The second is to build rewards into your process – Having rewards is the best way to motivate ourselves and makes our mini-habits easier to stick to. For example, if you don’t eat at McDonald’s then your reward could be having a spa massage at the end of the week.

“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.” – Thomas Jefferson

Find The Right Balance

At the end of the day, we need to master both goal-driven and process-driven approaches to succeed. Use the goal-driven approach for short-term goals or when you need a burst of energy to push you through a task. Use the process-driven approach for long-term lifestyle change journeys such as getting healthier, having more meaningful relationships or pursuing a career that resonates with your purpose in life. In this way, you too can soon be the person who seems to magically “have it all”.

What are you doing today to reach success later on? Let us know your tips in the comments below!

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Success Advice

You Don’t Have To Listen To Every Bit Of Career Feedback. Some People Just Don’t Get You And That’s Fine!

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I recently got rejected from what I thought was a fantastic career opportunity. I was told that I was “Not entrepreneurial enough.”

Those that know me well know that it’s probably one of the few things I’m good at. Many of my mentors who I told this story to laughed out loud.

These three words were career feedback and I was always led to believe that to ignore this feedback would be ignorant and stupid.

I pondered that thought for a few days and then had a revelation: “I don’t have to listen to every bit of feedback I get.”

 

Pissed off is a natural first reaction.

That’s how I felt after someone told me I was crap at the very thing I love and have dedicated most of my time to. Our brain wants to be angry and fight back. Our first reaction, though, is often not what we should pay attention to.

“Empty space and time to reflect is how we process career feedback for what it really is: an opinion”

Don’t let your first reaction dominate how you think about the feedback. Maturity that can come at any age will show you to question everything – even your reaction.

 

Some people just don’t get you.

You’re not their type, they don’t like you, you speak a different language or you may have different values. Not everyone is going to get you and what you stand for and that’s okay. In my case, I didn’t connect.

Buying into the circus that is me is not for everyone. If you don’t like vulnerability or breaking comfort zones, then you probably won’t like me.

If you’re not obsessed with big goals, doing the impossible and trying to improve just a little bit every day, then you probably won’t like me.

That’s okay and I forgive you. I don’t have all the answers and I’m far from perfect – like the rest of us.

Learn to accept that some people will never get you and what you’re about.

That realization is how we overcome career feedback that we may not agree with.

 

Sometimes it’s any excuse. The real answer is something different.

Feedback can be disguised by the truth. The truth is maybe there was someone else the whole time and I never had a chance at this career opportunity. Maybe it wasn’t me at all.

Sometimes feedback is given because the real reason is much harder to deliver. It’s not easy to say “Tim, thanks but we hired someone else and you were never in the running.”

Admitting you never even had a chance is something many of us would never want to say. Being brutally honest takes courage, and courage is not everyone’s kind of kebab with garlic sauce on top, sprinkles and chili flakes.

 

We all get rejected.

I nearly forgot this fact. Everyone gets rejected. In fact, right now, someone is being rejected.

Rejection is not limited to you and me; learning to deal with it will only help us, not hinder our ability to achieve success in any field.

“We’ve all got 99 problems and thinking you’re special will only create more pointless thoughts that won’t serve you or your goals”

 

You’re responsible.

The thing about career feedback is that you have to take responsibility. Maybe in my case, I didn’t deliver the message of how obsessed and skilled I am at entrepreneurship. Maybe I could have done a better job at explaining my entrepreneurial background and passion.

It’s highly likely that I am entrepreneurial enough for this career opportunity and that it’s not a lack of skill at play here but a lack of effective communication.

“Responsibility always trumps the blame game and it helps us grow more as a person”

 

There’s always one lesson.

Mine was to develop more skills in strategy.

Let’s stop for one second: I hate the word strategy. The other career feedback I got was to do more strategy yet that’s not a skill of mine and I have no desire to do lots of that in my career.

The key here is that there’s always a lesson from all feedback and it might not be the intended lesson that the giver left you with.

There’s either a great lesson in the feedback or a reminder in the feedback of what you stand for. Don’t let any feedback compromise your values and who you are.

 

You are good enough.

You just have to believe in yourself and eventually, the right opportunity will find you.

Don’t give up your hopes and dreams because of one rejection. Interrupt the story in your head that plays on repeat and focuses on anger towards another person.

Replace that story with thoughts of how you can do better and get to the next opportunity.

Through rejection and bad career feedback, you find your way to what you’ve always wanted. That’s the hack and it works.

I’m off to suck up the rejection and take my own advice. Much respect.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Success Advice

6 Important Lessons That Will Lead You to Success

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success

Failure is a part of life and it’s nothing to be ashamed of because the most highly successful people are the ones who have experienced failures the most in their life. The general public usually learns about people and their work when they become successful but only a handful of people know about the immense struggles that those people have gone through. Unfortunately, we do not have the stories of their failures to which we can relate our own setbacks and this is why we perceive failure to be a bad thing.

People are afraid of failure because, from a very young age, they are taught that making mistakes and being wrong is a bad thing so when a person suffers from a failure, it’s possible for that person to experience some form of depression. It is important for you to understand failure is a way for you to learn and move on from the experience. It is literally impossible to live life forever without failing at something, unless you live your life so carefully that you forget to live at all.

Here are 6 lessons that you should embrace that will change in your life:

1. Keep Your Expectations Low

When it comes to life, people often expect things like family, business, and marriage to be constant and consistent throughout the years. However, this is not the case because life is not that simple and there are always ups and downs which you need to confront.

Having low expectations is totally understandable and justifiable but having high expectations from relationships and businesses could prove to be harmful if those things don’t last forever. In addition to this, keeping your expectations low helps you accept whatever comes from the situation. High expectations tend to result in disappointment, pain, and loss, so it’s better for you to have low expectations, yet continue to work hard with what you are doing.

2. Acknowledge the Change

Most of the time, people think they may not experience change at all in their life because they are expecting things to last forever, but little do they know that change is always waiting to take place and can happen at any point in time. Acknowledging change means you’re fully aware of the situation and this will help when change occurs and you move from the stage of shock to acceptance.

“It is not the strongest or the most intelligent who will survive but those who can best manage change.” – Charles Darwin

3. Accept the Change

The acceptance of change can be difficult and you might resist it at first, but you need to understand the fact that accepting the change will help you make the necessary adjustments that you need in your life. Preventing and stopping the change from happening can prove to be disastrous for you because you are rejecting the fact that the situation has changed and are still living in the past.

Things turn out to be different from the way you expected them to be and this is completely  fine because you will be able to deal with the change more effectively by embracing the new situation.

4. Learn from Your Past

Once you accept the change and are ready to embrace it, it will start making sense and you will find lessons from which you can learn a lot. It is important to learn from your previous mistakes because learning and moving on eliminates the probability of you making those mistakes again in future.

5. Grow Stronger than Before

Accepting, embracing and learning from the change makes you stronger and better than you were in the past. The ability to learn from your past makes you a better person who is able to deal with the changes more easily and is able to move on without having any regrets in life. Moreover, this change will take away the fear of making new adjustments in life.

“Embrace uncertainty. Some of the most beautiful chapters in our lives won’t have a title until much later.” – Bob Goff

6. Acknowledge the Wisdom and Embrace it

The more you permit change to happen in your life, the better you grow as an individual. Embracing the wisdom will bring new found energy and strength into your life with inner peace and calmness. Embracing the change proactively and accepting it as a part of your life will result in you being calmer and stronger than ever. Change is not your enemy but the greatest teacher from whom you will learn most of your life lessons.

It is worth mentioning that during the process of accepting change, you need to be brutally honest with yourself because most people are in denial and fail to realize the real reason behind the change. It is insane to repeat the same mistakes again and again with the expectations of a different result. So, if you do not learn from your mistakes, you are doomed to fail again.

Failure can find you again, but if the situation is different from the previous one, then it’s just another experience. You need to stand up after you fall since you cannot stop problems from occurring in your life. What you can do is handle them in a more strategic way.

Problems are a part of your journey, however, the important thing is to keep your eyes on the final destination. Once you reach your final destination, you will realize that all those problems you faced were totally worth the success.

Failure is the one who falls and never stands back up. When you stand back up and keep on trying to achieve what you want, you’re not a failure but a winner in life. So, never lose hope and always look for the positive side, even in the toughest of situations because this is what successful people do.

How do you embrace change and keep pushing forward in life? Let us know in the comments below!

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5 Ways to Think Yourself Into Mind Blowing Results From Globally Renowned Leaders

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deep thought

Many wonder why someone who’s less qualified is achieving greater success even though you’re smarter, work harder, or even have more influential connections. The only way someone succeeds is by thinking correctly. It doesn’t matter who you know, what school you attended, or what grades you got; all that matters are your thoughts. Both men and women around the world have been telling people “the secret” to success for hundreds of years. It’s time to listen. (more…)

Lucas Robak used to fly planes, now he leads various wisdom-sharing communities. Being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS), Lucas began researching how to successfully live with it. Soon after, he was leading a health & wellness community and helping entrepreneurs use a published book for marketing. As a visionary, creative thinker, and strategist, Lucas discovered many mind hacks, health tips, and business tricks along the way which he loves sharing. To experience your own results from a #1 bestselling author, find him on LinkedIn or www.LucasRobak.com.

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23 Comments

23 Comments

  1. Rawlings Lyson

    Nov 29, 2016 at 9:28 pm

    lm passionate about business thank you for the article

  2. Cecelia Jernegan

    Nov 17, 2016 at 1:38 pm

    Great article. I am a 65 year young retired grandma and you nail it! Good job. Keep up the great work.

  3. Apoorv Sharma

    Nov 12, 2016 at 12:07 pm

    Very inspiring article Tim , and very much true . I have observed most of the things mentioned here .
    I believe everyone should aim in their 20 s to be the best version of themselves and improve on daily basis. I won’t say i’m “killing it” in this aim, but i’m not ready to give up until i become the person i want to be.

    Such Article , like yours motivates me to skyrocket my enthusiasm and double my efforts .
    Keep up the great work . Cheers .

  4. Rob Malone

    May 23, 2016 at 5:43 pm

    Great article. I wish I would have learned all this in my twenties.

    I think you point about money can’t buy happiness is huge. People just don’t understand this until they have money and think “why am still miserable”. It is finding your “why” and pursuing it that will bring happiness.

    Also your perspective on tattoos was really interesting. I always felt that tattoos represented something hidden down deep and I find your analogy very plausible.

    Thanks for sharing the article.

    • Tim Denning

      May 27, 2016 at 9:37 pm

      Rob thanks for the kind words. Money is always something that mankind will struggle with but I hope the message eventually get’s out there – money will not make you happy. Glad you liked the tattoo’s piece of the article. I am not someone that likes tattoos but I respect people’s right to choose what they do with their body.

  5. shahwc

    May 22, 2016 at 3:39 am

    Thanks for your article Tim! This is really inspiring as me myself in my 20’s. Hope my 20’s will bring something in my life and my family.

    • Tim Denning

      May 27, 2016 at 9:35 pm

      Shah I am sure your 20’s will be successful. Make sure you enjoy them and don’r look back. Thanks for reading!

  6. Kat

    May 18, 2016 at 2:55 pm

    I just turned 20 and graduated with a Marketing degree! Deciding what to do now is driving me crazy! Thanks for this article!!

    • Tim Denning

      May 20, 2016 at 3:27 am

      No problem Kat. Best of luck with your marketing degree and don’t overthink it.

  7. Aleksandra

    May 16, 2016 at 10:21 pm

    I’m 24 now and I must say that this article is like winning in a lottery. Thank you Tim for this great motivation and inspiration to continue to reach my goals and dreams and just enjoy life, focus on present and be happy and wealthy.
    I have many small and big goals for myself and I know that this is a great period to successfully reach them all!
    Stay cool and I’m waiting for a new great article from you! 🙂

    • Tim Denning

      May 17, 2016 at 12:43 am

      Wow thanks Aleksandra for the massive compliment. Plenty more articles to come so stay tuned.

  8. Toño

    May 16, 2016 at 5:35 pm

    As I have approached my another B’day as well month ago I can tell my 20s have been the craziest time and full of events I would never wished or imagined. I haven’t achieved any success during that time, but through all the struggle, hustle and tragedy I was able to grow and become a better, new person. It was a preparation for a big journey I am now. If to describe my 20s in one sentence it has to be my favourite quote by Thomas Edison: ‘I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work’ 🙂

    Now I can take those lessons of yours to turn my 30s into something big. I don’t count the age, as Time is a man-made concept which most often does not define thyself.

    You’ve listed amazing lessons which will help me on my journey, and I’m going to use them well. I want to highlight those lessons I will the most attachemnt with at the moment:

    #1. The very first lesson. Success is rare, and that not everyone will reach it, taste it and experience it. It got me deep. I am still don’t quite know yet what success really is and whether I’m going to achieve it. You are right about it rarity, and that most people will fail, I’ve been there and know what it is and it gives me another reason to appreciate things more and value my time. I have to define success first, and I am still not quite there yet. I may never learn it, but I will never give up.

    The next lesson is to find your freaking why, man. Exactly! Just few days ago I have been thinking exact same thing, like what is the reason behind most of my daily actions and routine and how to overcome some stress if you really have to do something? Find you WHY, that’s how!
    And then your article comes up with like the same line. Yeah, eyeballs. Amazing!

    For a long time I was convinced you should be young, talented and awesome to do special and particular things, but slowly I realized it does not have to be that. I have been limiting myself out for so long that it seems like I just started to re-learn some regular stuff now. Taking another lesson, anything can be learned, I now can fully agree with you. We have to try multiple things out to find out what it’s like and what we are here to do, and it doesn’t have to be complicated. Back to the Monk WHo Sold His Ferrari story, I have been emptying my cup so I can fill it with new knowledge.

    Oh, and I have watched ‘In pursuit of Happyness’ (this time I spelled it right) as I’ve finally found it in English (surprisingly through my old xbox 360 account!). I think this movie reflect perfectly well on the sunject and on some of the lessons of yours. Thank you SO very much for suggestion, my friend, it was amazing experience and I enjoyed this movie so much. Still feel the emotion, what a beautiful story and what an amazing actors play. I will show it to my sister, she will greatly appreciate it I am sure!

    My gratitude and much love for this article, Tim, you tought me well! Speak with you soon, have a great day and stay healthy!

    • Tim Denning

      May 17, 2016 at 12:46 am

      Toño we always seem to be on a similar journey my friend. I love how you practice what you learn and the fact you are beginning to empty your cup. The Pursuit Of Happyness is my all time favourite movie. It’s what success is all about. The struggles are where all the beauty lies and it’s what will make you successful .

      Keep in touch my friend.

  9. Sophia

    May 16, 2016 at 2:32 am

    Hi Tim,
    Wished you wrote this peace a decade ago and I had a chance to read it. I would have changed scripts that were installed by my culture, surrounding, and myself.
    I would add additional point to the list: choose carefully who are you friends and how much your family can influence you. On subconscious level we always want to fit, be excepted by others, and be part of a tribe. Our social environment affects our mindset, which directly result in our choices for actions. Unless we have good role models, we will fall in trap of following tribe habits which may not be in our personal best interests.
    Thanks again

    • Tim Denning

      May 16, 2016 at 4:52 am

      Sophia I wish I wrote this a decade ago as well…lol, although it’s taken me a while to gain the knowledge Your points are spot on and your environment is very important although not as important as your internal environment that governs everything you do.

      Thanks for reading Sophia.

  10. france

    May 15, 2016 at 9:08 am

    thank you for this inspirational article.greets from grom germany

    • Tim Denning

      May 15, 2016 at 10:33 am

      Not a problem France and thanks for reading 🙂

  11. Rayon

    May 15, 2016 at 7:30 am

    Hey Tim,

    Firstly this line “I would almost go as far as saying the less you know about something, the more you are likely to succeed.” I agree with this 100%.
    In fact a friend and I were having a conversation about this just the other day. We both came to the conclusion that knowing too much sometimes hinder one from getting off the ground and doing the epic. Sometimes even to the point where you’ve dug so deep that you talk yourself out of a very good idea.

    Next, “The fewer resources you have, the more creative with your approach you have to be.” This is a must.
    I remember in high school’s Technical Drawing I had one pencil that I used for every type of line and my drawing table was an enamel stove top that I drew on at home, however, those drawings always stood out to the point where students wanted me to draw for them.
    We can’t allow lack of resources to hold us back. Use what is available to do what we must, eventually all the resources required will show up and whenever they break down and they usually do, working without them won’t be an issue.

    Lastly, “Walking away from a business for me was a massive change.” I’m curious to know how you managed this. Would love to hear more.

    You’ve dropped great points here and this article is definitely worth sharing. Thanks for another great post man.

    Rayon.

    • Tim Denning

      May 15, 2016 at 10:33 am

      Rayon thank you for sharing what you took away from the post. I love your story about your technical drawing experience it highlights my point perfectly.

      The part where I mention the business is something I am happy to share with you. Feel free to drop me a line on Facebook or through my website.

  12. Chipokota

    May 15, 2016 at 6:27 am

    Wow. Beautiful article. As I turn 28 at the end of the year I have so much to reflect on. I couldn’t have read a better article of encouragement that I have lived my twenties not too badly! And should continue making the most out of life! Biggest of all for that comment that I am just three contacts away from a global influencer. I agree totally and I see it all the time in my life! The world is not as big as it seems. Let’s do this!

    • Tim Denning

      May 15, 2016 at 7:16 am

      Chipokota glad to see you are also doing some reflecting. I’m sure you have done fine thus far in life. The global influencer point will serve you well my friend if you use it. Take care!

  13. Gabriel DoCarmo

    May 14, 2016 at 9:51 pm

    Great article Tim, thank you so much for writing. For me, my 20s are freakin awesome! I’m extremely happy with the man I’m becoming and the direction I’m headed in life. I’ve learned that You determine your Reality 100%, nothing happens to you everything happens BECAUSE of You. If you want something you go get it, period. Nobody is coming to the rescue. We live in the best Possible time in the history of the world and country with huge amount of abundance and Opportunity (US) I’m turning 22 next week and looking forward to learning much much more! Life is Awesome
    -Gabriel DoCarmo

    • Tim Denning

      May 14, 2016 at 10:56 pm

      Thanks for the inspiring message and I’m sure the rest of your 20’s will be outstanding. Technology and the internet are brining us so many opportunities. Exciting times!

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Success Advice

5 Ways to Think Yourself Into Mind Blowing Results From Globally Renowned Leaders

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deep thought

Many wonder why someone who’s less qualified is achieving greater success even though you’re smarter, work harder, or even have more influential connections. The only way someone succeeds is by thinking correctly. It doesn’t matter who you know, what school you attended, or what grades you got; all that matters are your thoughts. Both men and women around the world have been telling people “the secret” to success for hundreds of years. It’s time to listen.

Here are five tactics to begin today:

1. Writing Goals the Napoleon Hill Way

Thinking yourself into mind blowing results starts with the end in mind. Athletes know exactly what their goal is and how to earn the points to win. Life’s exactly the same.  In nearly every Napoleon Hill book, he lays out a goal achieving formula which has helped millions around the world. By following this, you will accomplish something you currently believe is impossible.

Start by writing a clear statement of your desire, then formulate a clear plan to attain it. You’ll also need to know what you plan on giving up in return. Set a definite time limit. Everything you wrote down, memorize it and repeat it to yourself often. It’s imperative you express gratitude towards receiving the results you’re still working for. Be grateful you achieved your desired outcomes long before you actually materialize them into your world.

“If you cannot do great things yourself, remember that you may do small things in a great way.” – Napoleon Hill

2. Creating Your Mental Image How Bob Proctor Teaches

In Bob Proctor’s’ book, You Were Born Rich, he titled Chapter 3, “The Image Maker” because we think in pictures. Our thoughts are like movie clips being projected on the screens of our minds; control the pictures, control the outcomes.  It’s vital to manage our thoughts and expel the ones that don’t serve us. Knowing this, you’re now the ‘mental architect’ of your life, of your destiny!

Once you have your desired outcome, it’s time to put that image on the screen of your mind. See yourself already in possession of what you desire. Clearly watch yourself living it, hearing the sounds and feeling the feelings you’ll experience.

A powerful question to ask to know which moment should be on the screen of your mind is, “what’s the last thing that needs to happen in order for me to know I’ve achieved the result I’m after?” This is the moment to focus on!

3. Allow Dr. David Schwartz to Give Yourself a Daily Pep-Talk

Start thinking more of yourself through self-praise. You’ll begin to discover how much bigger and stronger you feel when you upgrade your thinking habits. In Dr. David Schwartz’s book, The Magic of Thinking Big, he provides you with a daily technique. Constantly reminding yourself that you’re top-notch by using his “Sell-Yourself-to-Yourself 60 Second Commercial.”

Developing the “commercial” is as easy as writing down your assets and points of superiority. What’ll separate you from the herd is practicing your “commercial” out loud in front of a mirror once a day with enthusiasm and determination. Lastly, read it silently many times throughout the day as a constant reminder of your greatness. Just like a written goal, keep this with you at all times. It’s a great mental tool to regain enthusiasm and determination after the inevitable setback.

4. Experience Unlimited Power Like Tony Robbins

Have you heard about Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP)? It’s the study of success and how to emulate it; it’s the language of the mind and how to create concise results. From the many learnings gathered from both Tony Robbins and the study of NLP, controlling your state of mind is one thing that will drastically change the results you’re currently producing.

In his book, Unlimited Power, Tony Robbins gifted us with the technique, “memory management.” This is linking an emotion to a memory which instantly elicits that empowering feeling. Simply know your arsenal of positive memories to think about when you need that extra umph.

Successful people gain access to their most resourceful emotions on a consistent basis, you can too. What’s great about the mind is that they don’t even need to be real memories. Daydreaming about your fantasy life will do the trick too!

“People who succeed at the highest level are not lucky; they’re doing something differently than everyone else.” – Tony Robbins

5. Think Positive as if You Were Norman Vincent Peale

Believing in yourself is vital to succeed, but not crucial to begin. The path to attainment is by forming faith and expectancy that what you desire is going to happen. In Norman Vincent Peale’s book, The Power of Positive Thinking, he wrote a chapter for each of these important necessities; believing and expecting. By not having both of these right now, or even just one of them, that shouldn’t stop you from anything!

There’s an undeniable cure for both. To believe in yourself and have the full expectation that what you want will come to pass, the only tactic out there are autosuggestions, commonly known as affirmations.

Developing statements in the positive, present tense and repeating them thousands of times a day, you’ll reprogram your subconscious mind to a success-filled mindset. By convincing your subconscious to believe in your end game, soon enough, you’ll begin to expect it; just like you expect to go to sleep tonight.

Since our minds are the most powerful force in all of creation, it’s time to start using it to its fullest potential. Start today by writing your goal the Napoleon Hill way!

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Success Advice

2 Secret Roads to Success – Why Some People Have It All and How You Can Too

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road to success

Have you wondered how some people seem to have it all – the 6-figure pay check, a healthy and fit body and amazing relationships? On the other hand, others are successful in one aspect of our lives (perhaps we are happy with our careers) but there’s always something that’s missing – that strong body, that perfect someone or living a meaningful life.

I’ve personally experienced having a successful career but failed at having a healthy and strong body. When I finally succeeded at getting and staying healthy, I realized that there are two completely different approaches, both of which need to be mastered to find success in life – the goal-driven approach and the process-driven approach.

The Goal-Driven Approach

A goal-driven approach is one in which our goals themselves, are sufficient to motivate us to act until we achieve them. This works well for:

  1. Short-term goals lasting a few days or a few weeks, where we can see the end in sight and push ourselves to get there.
  2. Goals that are usually within or just outside our comfort zone.
  3. Goals that have some certainty of success at the end. For example, working overnight and acing the client presentation the next morning makes us feel proud of our achievement and gets us recognition from our boss.

This approach inherently rewards speed, agility and short bursts of intense work. We end up relying on quick wins or successes which make the task worth it and help us feel motivated to achieve our goals.

Most of us are very adept at using this approach because we’ve grown up in environments, traditional education and companies, which operate this way. Schools and universities set exams and corporate jobs require us to complete tasks upon which we get good grades or promotions.

When the Goal-Driven Approach Doesn’t Work

What a goal-driven approach doesn’t teach us though is how to approach long-term goals like staying healthy, having meaningful relationships or building our careers around our purpose in life.

  1. These goals are usually so big and so long-term that we don’t fully understand all the steps to reach them.
  2. They don’t have any immediate reward associated with them so our motivation to chase them decreases after the initial burst of inspiration. For example, it’s impossible to lose weight and keep it off by just eating healthy for a week.
  3. Because they are so long-term, any future action of ours can completely wipe out the gains made in the beginning of the process which is even more de-motivating. For example, a week of eating healthy can be wiped out by one night of bingeing.
  4. There is also no artificial sense of urgency like deadlines -so we need to find the motivation internally to engage in the task every day. If we ever try to impose timelines on these tasks, it only stresses us out and we compensate by completely sabotaging ourselves like eating an entire pack of cookies one fine night exhausted from a week of eating too little.

“If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.” – Yogi Berra

The Process-Driven Approach

The process-driven approach breaks down our big goals into minute goals and creates a habit to execute these minute goals regularly.

Putting such a habit into place is simple. Just follow these four steps:

  1. Break down your big vision into multiple long-term goals all of which have to work together to make your big vision come true. For example, for your big goal of feeling healthy and fit, you may break it down into eating healthier, exercising regularly and sleeping more.
  2. Pick one of the goals to focus on, ideally the one you think will have the biggest payoff.
  3. Break this goal down into a series of simple activities that you can do without much effort. For example, let’s say you picked eating healthier as your priority goal. One of the activities that might be sabotaging you is your regular McDonald’s dinner on the way back from work. A simple activity that can replace this is to stop driving by McDonald’s if it’s triggering your craving and take a different route back home instead.  This might take a little bit of willpower on the first day but as you get used to the new route over a couple of weeks, it’ll become an automatic habit.
  4. Once the first activity feels like a normal part of your day, stack on the second activity and so on. Similarly, once you’ve achieved the first goal, stack on the second, third and remaining goals to reach your long-term vision.

How to Succeed with the Process-Driven Approach

Though this seems simple in theory, there are two emotional and mindset changes needed to succeed with this method.

The first is to be patient – instead of focusing on the big shiny dream, measure progress against the habit that you’re trying to cultivate. Accept that seeing the big vision come true takes months and sometimes years. Our biggest Achilles heel is impatience and while this works well in academia and work, it backfires in building health and relationships because we end up taking short cuts that harm us long term.

The second is to build rewards into your process – Having rewards is the best way to motivate ourselves and makes our mini-habits easier to stick to. For example, if you don’t eat at McDonald’s then your reward could be having a spa massage at the end of the week.

“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.” – Thomas Jefferson

Find The Right Balance

At the end of the day, we need to master both goal-driven and process-driven approaches to succeed. Use the goal-driven approach for short-term goals or when you need a burst of energy to push you through a task. Use the process-driven approach for long-term lifestyle change journeys such as getting healthier, having more meaningful relationships or pursuing a career that resonates with your purpose in life. In this way, you too can soon be the person who seems to magically “have it all”.

What are you doing today to reach success later on? Let us know your tips in the comments below!

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Success Advice

You Don’t Have To Listen To Every Bit Of Career Feedback. Some People Just Don’t Get You And That’s Fine!

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I recently got rejected from what I thought was a fantastic career opportunity. I was told that I was “Not entrepreneurial enough.”

Those that know me well know that it’s probably one of the few things I’m good at. Many of my mentors who I told this story to laughed out loud.

These three words were career feedback and I was always led to believe that to ignore this feedback would be ignorant and stupid.

I pondered that thought for a few days and then had a revelation: “I don’t have to listen to every bit of feedback I get.”

 

Pissed off is a natural first reaction.

That’s how I felt after someone told me I was crap at the very thing I love and have dedicated most of my time to. Our brain wants to be angry and fight back. Our first reaction, though, is often not what we should pay attention to.

“Empty space and time to reflect is how we process career feedback for what it really is: an opinion”

Don’t let your first reaction dominate how you think about the feedback. Maturity that can come at any age will show you to question everything – even your reaction.

 

Some people just don’t get you.

You’re not their type, they don’t like you, you speak a different language or you may have different values. Not everyone is going to get you and what you stand for and that’s okay. In my case, I didn’t connect.

Buying into the circus that is me is not for everyone. If you don’t like vulnerability or breaking comfort zones, then you probably won’t like me.

If you’re not obsessed with big goals, doing the impossible and trying to improve just a little bit every day, then you probably won’t like me.

That’s okay and I forgive you. I don’t have all the answers and I’m far from perfect – like the rest of us.

Learn to accept that some people will never get you and what you’re about.

That realization is how we overcome career feedback that we may not agree with.

 

Sometimes it’s any excuse. The real answer is something different.

Feedback can be disguised by the truth. The truth is maybe there was someone else the whole time and I never had a chance at this career opportunity. Maybe it wasn’t me at all.

Sometimes feedback is given because the real reason is much harder to deliver. It’s not easy to say “Tim, thanks but we hired someone else and you were never in the running.”

Admitting you never even had a chance is something many of us would never want to say. Being brutally honest takes courage, and courage is not everyone’s kind of kebab with garlic sauce on top, sprinkles and chili flakes.

 

We all get rejected.

I nearly forgot this fact. Everyone gets rejected. In fact, right now, someone is being rejected.

Rejection is not limited to you and me; learning to deal with it will only help us, not hinder our ability to achieve success in any field.

“We’ve all got 99 problems and thinking you’re special will only create more pointless thoughts that won’t serve you or your goals”

 

You’re responsible.

The thing about career feedback is that you have to take responsibility. Maybe in my case, I didn’t deliver the message of how obsessed and skilled I am at entrepreneurship. Maybe I could have done a better job at explaining my entrepreneurial background and passion.

It’s highly likely that I am entrepreneurial enough for this career opportunity and that it’s not a lack of skill at play here but a lack of effective communication.

“Responsibility always trumps the blame game and it helps us grow more as a person”

 

There’s always one lesson.

Mine was to develop more skills in strategy.

Let’s stop for one second: I hate the word strategy. The other career feedback I got was to do more strategy yet that’s not a skill of mine and I have no desire to do lots of that in my career.

The key here is that there’s always a lesson from all feedback and it might not be the intended lesson that the giver left you with.

There’s either a great lesson in the feedback or a reminder in the feedback of what you stand for. Don’t let any feedback compromise your values and who you are.

 

You are good enough.

You just have to believe in yourself and eventually, the right opportunity will find you.

Don’t give up your hopes and dreams because of one rejection. Interrupt the story in your head that plays on repeat and focuses on anger towards another person.

Replace that story with thoughts of how you can do better and get to the next opportunity.

Through rejection and bad career feedback, you find your way to what you’ve always wanted. That’s the hack and it works.

I’m off to suck up the rejection and take my own advice. Much respect.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Success Advice

6 Important Lessons That Will Lead You to Success

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Failure is a part of life and it’s nothing to be ashamed of because the most highly successful people are the ones who have experienced failures the most in their life. The general public usually learns about people and their work when they become successful but only a handful of people know about the immense struggles that those people have gone through. Unfortunately, we do not have the stories of their failures to which we can relate our own setbacks and this is why we perceive failure to be a bad thing.

People are afraid of failure because, from a very young age, they are taught that making mistakes and being wrong is a bad thing so when a person suffers from a failure, it’s possible for that person to experience some form of depression. It is important for you to understand failure is a way for you to learn and move on from the experience. It is literally impossible to live life forever without failing at something, unless you live your life so carefully that you forget to live at all.

Here are 6 lessons that you should embrace that will change in your life:

1. Keep Your Expectations Low

When it comes to life, people often expect things like family, business, and marriage to be constant and consistent throughout the years. However, this is not the case because life is not that simple and there are always ups and downs which you need to confront.

Having low expectations is totally understandable and justifiable but having high expectations from relationships and businesses could prove to be harmful if those things don’t last forever. In addition to this, keeping your expectations low helps you accept whatever comes from the situation. High expectations tend to result in disappointment, pain, and loss, so it’s better for you to have low expectations, yet continue to work hard with what you are doing.

2. Acknowledge the Change

Most of the time, people think they may not experience change at all in their life because they are expecting things to last forever, but little do they know that change is always waiting to take place and can happen at any point in time. Acknowledging change means you’re fully aware of the situation and this will help when change occurs and you move from the stage of shock to acceptance.

“It is not the strongest or the most intelligent who will survive but those who can best manage change.” – Charles Darwin

3. Accept the Change

The acceptance of change can be difficult and you might resist it at first, but you need to understand the fact that accepting the change will help you make the necessary adjustments that you need in your life. Preventing and stopping the change from happening can prove to be disastrous for you because you are rejecting the fact that the situation has changed and are still living in the past.

Things turn out to be different from the way you expected them to be and this is completely  fine because you will be able to deal with the change more effectively by embracing the new situation.

4. Learn from Your Past

Once you accept the change and are ready to embrace it, it will start making sense and you will find lessons from which you can learn a lot. It is important to learn from your previous mistakes because learning and moving on eliminates the probability of you making those mistakes again in future.

5. Grow Stronger than Before

Accepting, embracing and learning from the change makes you stronger and better than you were in the past. The ability to learn from your past makes you a better person who is able to deal with the changes more easily and is able to move on without having any regrets in life. Moreover, this change will take away the fear of making new adjustments in life.

“Embrace uncertainty. Some of the most beautiful chapters in our lives won’t have a title until much later.” – Bob Goff

6. Acknowledge the Wisdom and Embrace it

The more you permit change to happen in your life, the better you grow as an individual. Embracing the wisdom will bring new found energy and strength into your life with inner peace and calmness. Embracing the change proactively and accepting it as a part of your life will result in you being calmer and stronger than ever. Change is not your enemy but the greatest teacher from whom you will learn most of your life lessons.

It is worth mentioning that during the process of accepting change, you need to be brutally honest with yourself because most people are in denial and fail to realize the real reason behind the change. It is insane to repeat the same mistakes again and again with the expectations of a different result. So, if you do not learn from your mistakes, you are doomed to fail again.

Failure can find you again, but if the situation is different from the previous one, then it’s just another experience. You need to stand up after you fall since you cannot stop problems from occurring in your life. What you can do is handle them in a more strategic way.

Problems are a part of your journey, however, the important thing is to keep your eyes on the final destination. Once you reach your final destination, you will realize that all those problems you faced were totally worth the success.

Failure is the one who falls and never stands back up. When you stand back up and keep on trying to achieve what you want, you’re not a failure but a winner in life. So, never lose hope and always look for the positive side, even in the toughest of situations because this is what successful people do.

How do you embrace change and keep pushing forward in life? Let us know in the comments below!

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