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The Formula That Puts You In Control Of Success

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Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup for the Soul, often tells audiences the story of how his book came to be. He and co-author Mark Hansen were motivational speakers when they came up with the idea for an inspirational book. It would tell real stories about real people, many of them from their audiences.

Canfield says he wrote every night from 10 pm until about 1 am for about a year to get the book finished. Then, he came up with a title that, in his own words, “gave me goosebumps.” He was certain it would be a huge hit immediately. After rejection from 144 publishers in a little over a year, they finally found a small publisher in Florida.  The empire that was built from that one little book has been stunning.

Canfield’s success theory

According to Canfield, he lives by one principle only, and that principle has been the cause of his success. The principle is that we have to accept 100% responsibility for all that happens to us in life. In accepting that responsibility, we control our thoughts, behaviors and actions and our responses to everything that is going on around us that we cannot control.

Success theory in practice

The equation that Canfield lives by is E+R =O. Here is how it works.

E = events. Take a look at the world around you. There is certainly plenty to be worried and anxious about. Wages are not going up, and the economy seems stuck. There is a mess in the Middle East that is impacting the whole world. There are events going on in your workplace that are negative. You personally cannot control those things; you can only control your responses to them. And that’s where the “R” comes in.

R = responses. There are 3 responses that we have to events. We respond with thoughts, images that we place in our minds, and behaviors. These tend to be negative when we focus on the events we cannot control. We worry, we fear, we visualize bad outcomes, and we talk about these fears and worries with others. When we do this, the events control us. If, on the other hand, we change those responses from negative to at least neutral, the events no longer control us. And this results in the “O,” or outcomes.

O = outcomes. When our responses change, we can then visualize different outcomes. We can see what it is we want to happen rather than what those events are saying will happen.

“There is no right reaction. There is only your reaction.”  – Jack Canfield

How to use the canfield theory of success

The most important element of this success equation is to shut out the events you cannot control and then to identify your life’s purpose. If you start with knowledge of your purpose, then the only events that will consume you are those that you choose to cause – the actions you take that will get your closer to your purpose (goal).

Here are the 5 steps:
  1. Finding your purpose is actually pretty easy. What are you passionate about? You may have strayed from that passion because of outside events (e.g., taking a job you don’t like for the security of a paycheck in a bad economy). But until you align yourself with your purpose, events will continue to control you.
  2. Set goals that align with your purpose. Do you want to be a writer? Then set a goal to be one.
  3. Visualize the outcome. See yourself as a writer, a teacher, a lawyer, or whatever it is that you know is your purpose.
  4. Take action toward that purpose fulfillment. Will there be hard work involved? Of course. But you can  develop the habit of creating the events that will fulfill that purpose in small steps. You are building the foundation, bit by bit. Every day, create 5 events that will take you closer to your goal. Make a list of those 5 actions (events) and put it in a visible place, checking each one off as it occurs. Every day that foundation gets a little bigger, because you have created 5 more events.
  5. Keep visualizing your outcome so that your optimism grows.

Success is not a chance event

Success can only be defined as fulfilling your purpose in life, as engaging yourself in that work about which you have passion. If success were only about money, then we could say that someone who wins the lottery is a success. Given that 95% of those winners are broke within 5 years of their wins, however, would tell us otherwise. All of that money without any thought to one’s life purpose is just a chance event that does not bring success.

“Slow down and take the time to really see. Take a moment to see what is going on around you right now, right where you are. You may be missing something wonderful.” ― Jeffrey Michael Thomas

We have to define success correctly, find our life purpose, create our own events that fulfill that purpose, and then fully enjoy the outcomes that we have visualized for ourselves. This is a life well lived.

Are you in control of your success? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below!

Daniela McVicker is a passionate digital marketer. Daniela is interested in everything related to SEO and blogging. She is a contributor to Essay Guard and other websites where she shares her experience and helps marketers make their name in the online world.

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Emile Steenveld Speaker and Coach

Some people seem to naturally know how to effectively communicate in a group setting. They can express themselves clearly and listen attentively without dominating the conversation.

Being a powerful communicator is important for several reasons, including building and maintaining relationships, achieving goals, resolving conflicts, improving productivity, leading and influencing others, advancing in your career, expressing yourself more confidently and authentically, and improving your mental and emotional well-being. Effective communication is an essential life skill that can benefit you in all aspects of your life.

But, don’t worry if you don’t naturally possess this skill, as effective communication is something that can be developed with practice, planning and preparation.
 

1.  Listen actively: Practice active listening by giving your full attention to the speaker and responding to what they are saying.

 

2. Use “I” statements: Speak from your own perspective and avoid placing blame or making accusations.

 

3. Avoid assumptions: Don’t make assumptions about what the other person is thinking or feeling.

 

4. Be clear: Express your thoughts and feelings clearly and concisely by getting to the point and avoid using jargon or overly complex language.

 

5. Show empathy: Show that you understand and care about the other person’s feelings.

 

6. Offer valuable insights: When speaking in a group, provide a valuable takeaway or actionable item that people can walk away with.

 

7. Be an active listener: Listen attentively and respond accordingly, incorporating your points into the conversation.

 

8. Choose the right time: Pick the most opportune time to speak to ensure that you have the group’s attention and can deliver your message without interruption.

 

9. Be the unifying voice: Step in and unify the group’s thoughts to calm down the discussion and insert your point effectively.

 

10. Keep responses concise: Keep responses short and to the point to show respect for others’ time.

 

11. Avoid unnecessary comments: Avoid commenting on everything and only speak when you have something important to say.

 

12. Cut the fluff: Avoid being long-winded and get straight to the point.

 

13. Prepare ahead of time: Sort out your points and practice them before speaking in a group.

 

14. Smile and be positive: Smile and nod along as others speak, to build a positive relationship and be respected when it’s your turn to speak.

 

15. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your own actions and feelings.

 

16. Ask questions: Ask questions to clarify any confusion or misunderstandings.

 

17. Avoid interrupting: Allow the other person to finish speaking without interruption.

 

18. Practice active listening: Repeat what the other person said to ensure you have understood correctly.

 

19. Use your body language too: Use nonverbal cues such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language to convey your message and build rapport.

 

20. Be aware of the tone of your voice: it should be calm and assertive, not aggressive or passive.

 

By keeping these tips in mind, you can improve your communication skills and become a more powerful communicator, which can help you build better relationships, achieve your goals, and lead a more fulfilling life.

I you want to learn how to become more confident in life then you can join my weekly mentorship calls and 40+ online workshops at AweBliss.com so you can master your life with more success.

 
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