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How To Ditch Your Dilemmas And Make Kick-Ass Decisions

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Life life unbound and make a positive change

Ever had that feeling of being stuck between a rock and a hard place?

There is no doubt you’ve had sleepless nights turning the problem over in your mind, wishing for a way out.

Wishing someone else could swoop in and change it for you.

Fantasizing that if only so-and-so would yield and do such-and-such… then everything would be ok.

 

But we’re old enough and wise enough to know that is rarely what happens.

Sometimes you just have to make a tough decision.

Sometimes it involved sacrifice.

And sometimes we lose a piece of ourselves in the process.

 

But What If I Told You It Didn’t Have To Be That Way?

What if you had a process to get out of any catch 22 situation and still walk away with what you want, and everyone else be happy?

There is a way, but it may mean shifting your perspective on how you think the world works.

You see, in my experience, most folks (and I’m talking intelligent, high achieving folks who can think for themselves) have come to the conclusion that the world is concrete.

I blame classical physics for this.

If x happens, then this leads to y, p times out of q.

And this is fine.

If life were that simple.

And some of us have hypnotised ourselves with pretzel logic to believe that it is.

Newsflash.

It’s not.

 

“Life is complex. Messy. Rough around the edges… but totally malleable” ReTweet This

 

Life is complex. It’s messy. It’s rough around the edges, and squidgy in the middle. It shifts, it turns, it surprises you and disappoints you and thrills you – often all simultaneously.

There are sooooo many variables in any situation you’re facing, there is no such thing as x leads to y.

And thinking that way keeps you stuck.

Thinking that way limits your options, your creativity and the quality of experience you will allow yourself to have in your world.

You essentially box yourself in to a limited, “inevitable doom”.

(Which, incidentally, you also created in your mind first!)

 

How To Think Of Your World

Instead of things being set in stone, think of them as yielding gently to your choices, and your thoughts.

Try thinking of the world as malleable. Dynamic. Fluid.

You are indeed the creator of your reality.

On every level.

Start acting like it.

How?

 

destiny inspirational picture quote about life

Dang the Doom

Ok, take that catch 22 you’ve been thinking about. That situation you’ve decided there is no way out of.

Now, most probably it involves other people. And you’re worried that whatever decision you make, someone is going to be hurt, or upset, or react in a way you don’t want them to.

Right?

Right.

So here’s the solution.

And hang with me before you have a reaction, because this is only step one.

 

Step 1

Make the decision that will make you the happiest first. (Taking out of the equation anyone else’s opinions… at this first stage).

Got it?

Ok, write it down. You need to commit this to paper so you can’t wiggle out of it and conveniently “forget” what would make you happy.

(Believe me, I’ve seen this happen in front of my very eyes on coaching calls… the subconscious can be sooo sneaky!)

Right – on to step 2.

 

Step 2

Practice putting all your attention on your happy outcome. Every time worries about other people, and “potential” (read: dreamt up, imagined, construed) downsides spring to mind, just drop those thoughts, and return to the happy thoughts.

Laver, rinse, repeat….

Several times per day.

Seems too simple huh?

Try doing it. Not so easy. But with a bit of practice you’ll get it, and you’ll find your groove and make magic happen.

 

But I Don’t Want To Upset Anyone!

So often folks will shy away from choosing their happy outcome because they want to keep everyone else happy. And whilst this is admirable, and yes, compassionate – there is a flawed premise.

This assumption that you’re leaning back on, presupposes that you can control other peoples’ happiness.

You cannot.

You can only influence your own. And by you being happy, you make those around you even happier.

You empower them.

You inspire them.

You show them that they too can get out there, be who they really are, do what makes them happy, kick some ass, and take some names…. (in a positive way, of course, lol..)

No more co-dependence.

No more zapped energy.

No more catch 22.

Quod Erat Demonstradum.

 

three choices in life inspiration

 

Here’s the thing:

1. If someone wants to be a victim, no matter what YOU do, they’re going to achieve it… one way or another. So shed that burden right now.

2. If you think about something bad happening, or someone having a problem with your decision, you will flat-out create that. Every time. No question.

3. If your decision directly affects another, as long as you are taking the happy decision aligned with your highest intention, and the biggest you possible, you can’t hurt anyone. It’s like when you’re vibrating at a high frequency, the folks who don’t match your frequency spin-off. They can’t get near you. And if your decision isn’t in line with their highest good, their frequency won’t match yours and they won’t be affected by you. They’ll spin off and have their adventures elsewhere, and be unaffected by all the horrible things you’ve dreamt up to create your dilemma.

So at this point, you may have questions about how to apply this to your specific circumstance.

Do feel free to ask away in the comments section.

Or even head over to my site and send me an email. I read every message, and I’m happy to help.

 

Oh, and you may want to print this article off, and pin it somewhere you can see it every day – as a reminder that you really are the creator of everything in your world. 😉

 

Here’s to your inevitable success!

 

Laura Leigh Clarke

a.k.a. the Whole Heart, Whole Brain Business Mentor

Wire Yourself for Wealth

 

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10 Comments

10 Comments

  1. Cathy G

    Apr 27, 2016 at 10:28 am

    Great article. I was recently let go from my job and have been looking at this as some thing better is coming my way and am being positive that I am going to find something where I will do what I love and live what I do. What kind of advice do you have in this catch 22 situation-I need a job but don’want just any job.

  2. amit krishan g

    Oct 24, 2015 at 4:29 pm

    Awesome article Laura. True being in catch 22 situation leads us nowhere. Better do what will really make you feel happy and being happiness from within.

  3. Jon Klement

    May 5, 2015 at 8:06 pm

    At the risk of sounding too “Star Wars-y”, there is a light and dark side to this.

    I have to disagree with the idea that when you’re in touch with your goals, that you can’t hurt anyone.

    Adolf Hitler, Mao Zedong, and a host of others were definitely in touch with what drove them, and were certainly achievers, but what made then happy DEFINITELY hurt people.

    I agree with 98% of this idea, except that “you can’t hurt anyone” when reaching for your highest goals. What about the parent who abandons their children because they decide that their “highest self” shouldn’t have been a parent and their greatest happiness is to abandon their child to chase some non-parenting-compatible goal? What message does that send to the kid about the responsibility of parenthood?

    I agree with 98% of this, but there are goals that are destructive to society and to other people that we, in our flawed human nature, can rationalize as “pursuing our greatest happiness”.

  4. Jen

    Jul 24, 2014 at 12:32 am

    Great article, and I was hoping for some help in my current catch 22.. I didn’t find anything that applied, unfortunately. It’s a bit more complicated. I want to get a home equity line of credit on my current home to make a few repairs to that home, as well as start our business with. In order to do that, I have to get home-owners insurance. I cannot get home owners insurance until I make those repairs, but I cannot make those repairs without that money from the line of credit.. I have thought positively for 3 years now, trying different insurance agencies, and exploring alternative funding methods. All the agencies say no, and the alternative methods seem shady at best. So we’ve put our dream on hold, and have given in to the realism that it just can’t be done, yet..

    Any ideas? lol

  5. Everyday Power

    Jul 22, 2014 at 6:31 am

    JUST GO FOR IT!

  6. Dan @ Solution Innovators

    Jul 21, 2014 at 8:15 pm

    Great article, Laura. I think just about everybody has had the feeling of being stuck between a rock and a hard place. You offer some great advice and steps for overcoming that feeling.

  7. ERICK WERE

    Jul 21, 2014 at 3:45 am

    It motivated me a lot. Thank you.

  8. Gavin Masumiya

    Jul 19, 2014 at 11:22 am

    Thank you for posting this. I think it is very beneficial to write down everything I’d like to manifest and I also keep a journal to track my thoughts a couples times a week. I know how easy it is to forget things and lose that dream or idea that I could make something out of with dedication.

    Your message to really follow through with what it is that makes ME authentically happy is refreshing and at the same time presents a contrast to where I currently reside – though temporarily. I am living in Japan teaching English but I am building up my coaching business as well – and I know getting it up and running, making a very successful career out of it will be far from easy. But who said being very successful at anything would be easy, right?

    Anyway, in Japan, you might know that the collective notion is to get along with everyone else even if it’s at the expense of one’s own opinion. I think this societal mentality definitely contributes to the unhappiness factor that the country faces. I will be in Japan for just one more year, but I make an effort everyday to offer what I offer best to people: Perspective and enthusiasm. Thank you for yours!

  9. Spyq

    Jul 18, 2014 at 5:05 pm

    Now that’s some good stuff right there! We’ll done and Thank You!

  10. Claude

    Jul 17, 2014 at 3:34 am

    Awesome stuff as always Laura!

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