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5 Ways To Stop Feeling Sorry For Yourself And Make A Change



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If you’d like to learn how to stop feeling sorry for yourself so you can change your life for the better, sign up for the free 90-Day Master Class hosted by the founder of, Joel Brown.

It is easier to quickly fall into despair nowadays. The constant cycle of bad news splattered all over the internet and the grueling struggle to adapt to the seemingly impersonal new normal makes one even more susceptible to thoughts and whispers of anguish. However, as despairing as our world’s current situation may seem, there is still a glimmer of silver lining on the horizon. We will get through this.

With that in mind, remember that sometimes it’s easy to get stuck in a negative thought pattern. The most important thing to know is that everyone is feeling pain, some people more than others – but the feeling of pain is real for everyone.

By stimulating our minds with thoughts of empowerment and betterment of ourselves, we can work towards not feeling sorry for ourselves and move on with life. 

Below are some ways that you can kickstart your life again – and you can begin today:

1. Try reading self-improvement books

Reading is not everyone’s cup of tea. Some prefer to watch videos and others prefer to listen to audiobooks. However, studies revealed that reading does wonders to our brains such as keeping it running and active, improve better connectivity, and auto fix concentration. Imagine what more a self-improvement book can do to you!

There are thousands of self-improvement books out there. Some work and some don’t, but it all depends on the quality of writing, the lesson the author wishes to impart, and how open your mind is as the reader.

Some of the self-improvement books that have broken the internet recently are David Goggin’s New York Times Bestselling book, Can’t Hurt Me. Coming from a traumatic past, Goggins set out and built himself a “Can’t Hurt Me” bulletproof mentality which allowed him to barrel through life’s challenges. Because of this mentality, he came out stronger, both in the mental and physical aspects, on the other side. It is a good read for those who are looking for motivational books that can help them reach their potential in life.

Another great book on self-improvement is Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin. Though this book is primarily about leadership from the military perspective, it tackles issues by looking at the importance of having a strong will coupled with a powerful mindset. This is a recommended book for those who are out to win in life. It also teaches one to practice discipline daily.

“If we encounter a man of rare intellect, we should ask him what books he reads.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

2. Check out self-help podcasts

If you’re more the audio type of person, listening to podcasts might suit you better. Have you ever had those moments when you’re listening to good, uplifting music, but the feeling it evoked is getting a little too repetitive? If yes, then maybe it’s time to alternate your playlist to a podcast every now and then. There are tons of self-help podcasts out there tackling various topics such as depression, anxiety, grief, happiness and even making major life decisions.

If you’re a newbie to the world of podcasts, there are several famous self-help podcasts you can check out such as The Hardcore Self-Help Podcast with Duff the Psych by the psychologist Dr. Robert Duff, Happier by the renowned writer Gretchen Rubin, and Hurry Slowly by the writer and editor Jocelyn Glei.

The Hardcore Self-Help Podcast tackles various issues such as coping with mental health and other living disorders without complicated medical jargon. Happier by Gretchen Rubin focuses on maintaining healthier and happier relationships with one’s self and with others. Hurry Slowly by Jocelyn Glei talks about the art of slowing down in order to find calm and peace in everyday life.

3. Give exercising a shot

Everyone has their own reasons why they don’t exercise, from not finding enough time to not having the proper equipment. However, as studies, coaches, trainers, and fitness buffs have reiterated repeatedly, exercising is not only good for your physical health, it is also the best antidote for your mental health

When you exercise, your body releases a certain chemical called endorphins which reduces the perception of pain in your brain. It also triggers the positive feelings in your body which help relieve feelings of depression.

You don’t need to have your own gym at home to start exercising. There are millions of simple five-minute exercises you can follow on your own even without using any equipment. When you finally get the hang of it, increase your level of difficulty up a notch by doing more vigorous and longer exercise routines! You’ll be amazed by the results it can do to your health and mood!

4. Discover a new hobby or rekindle an old pastime

Was there ever a time when you were doing something and everything else seems to just fade away because you were so immersed in it? If there was, rekindle those old flames and get back to those hobbies you loved doing. An important factor in how to stop feeling sorry for yourself is to immerse yourself completely in doing what you love the most. 

Binge-watch your favorite shows. Complete that jigsaw puzzle you’ve always wanted to work on. Dive into the current plant cultivating rave. Whatever it is, pinpoint that one hobby, project, or pastime that uplifts your spirits and get into it!

“Everyone should have a deep-seated interest or hobby to enrich his mind, add zest to living, and perhaps, depending upon what it is, result in a service to his country.” – Dale Carnegie

5. Try talking more positively to yourself

Have you ever heard of the phrase: “Be careful how you are talking to yourself because you are listening” by Lisa Hayes? Nothing is truer than this.

One of the main sources of depression is that irritating voice in our head that kills the mood and drowns out anything that makes us happy. By beating yourself up for every mistake you’ve done or for every bad thing that happened, you are demeaning a portion of yourself. And the more you do it, the more susceptible you are to fall into its trap.

Here’s what you can do instead: every time you look at the mirror, try tuning out that inner voice and talk out aloud. Tell yourself all the positive things you wish to hear. Compliment yourself on how you look and the things you look forward to the most in your day. Once you get the hang of talking positively to yourself, you won’t even need a mirror to do it. Soon, that killjoy inner voice will be replaced by your very own personal motivational coach: yourself.

We know very well that everyone has their own dark and bad days. Everyone undergoes pain and falling into the cycle seems like the easy way out, especially if the circumstances of everyday life never seem to change. You can allow yourself to feel those dark moments to remind yourself that you’re only human with flaws, but never ever allow yourself to succumb to them by following our five simple ways to stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Always thank yourself for holding on to that thin silver lining called hope, for choosing to forgive, and for loving yourself every single day. As Joseph Kennedy once said, “When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.”

What’s the biggest change you’ve made to your life recently? Share your stories with us below!

Marko Rakic is a trail runner from Sydney, Australia. When he’s not packing on the miles running, you will find him posting on his Health and Fitness blog, The Ultimate Primate. Whilst Marko’s blog is primarily focused on helping people become better runners he also focuses on mindfulness and positivity in order to live a healthy, happy life.

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