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5 Ways to Ditch Your Bad Habits that Undermine Your Success

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No one can be a bigger critic than you. Your brain is wired to value negative information more than positive information and to gather the evidence to support your thinking. Negativity bias affects all. You hold on to, cogitate and recall negative experiences more quickly. It serves to undermine your progress, keeps you stuck and stagnant. Self-confidence is compromised and when the pattern remains unchecked, failure is imminent.

Life is a matter of priority and decision. Rather than burying your head in social media day in and day out, wasting hours staring idly at the screen, invest your time in strengthening something of value, like you. When you believe you are worthy of success and commit to executing ideas, you position yourself to exchange self-sabotage for success.

Here are 5 ways to ditch self-critical patterns that undermine your success:

1. Happiness facilitates success

Most people believe that they must have something before they can do what they want to do, resulting in them being something. For instance, if l have time, then l can start a business and then l will be content. Somehow you have managed to have this back to front. The have-do-be paradigm must be reversed to experience success.

To experience happiness, you first must be whatever it is you want to be, you then begin to start doing things that you love from this space and then what you are doing will bring about the things you want to have.

“Identify your problems, but give your power and energy to solutions.” – Tony Robbins

2. Define what you want

Being able to define what you want in the present tense highlights who you are being to inform what you will do and ultimately who you become. One way of doing this is handwriting affirmations or your goals as if you have already achieved them. Napoleon Hill ‘s book ‘Think and Grow Rich’ encourages you to write down on a piece of paper the amount of money you want to make and identify a timeframe.

Jim Carrey not only dreamt of his future, he wrote himself a check for $10 million and put in the notation line “for services rendered”. He dated the check, placed it in his wallet and time lined his success within five years. Just before the end of the 5-year journey, he was paid $10 million for Dumb and Dumber.

3. Be your own inspiration

When you step into becoming your own hero, you stop looking for external validation. You preserve your energy as opinions and perceptions don’t matter. You stand in your truth and choose who you want to be at any moment. You stop waiting for someone else to believe in you enough to act and invest your energy into your strengths. The pitty patter of self-misery will never unlock your potential.

4. Turn impossibility into possibility

Successful people today aren’t shocked when things are off course. Instead of complaining, going into overwhelm or drowning in misery, they look for the opportunity as a chance to grow. Expansive thinking creates a mindset of being able to develop you out of any pain. Observing your circumstances differently and working to develop you, creates a solution focused framework that is ecological for all.

When you believe that your pain is caused by your circumstances, rather than your circumstances exposing where you need to develop or adapt next, you can get angry when things change, blame others and panic that you don’t have all the information. You become critical of others for not giving you all the information. Overwhelm kicks in and you are drowning in the quicksand.

Your mindset has everything to do with your success. People tend to believe that pain comes from increased expectations and demands and rarely consider that it may be coming from your response to those demands, your lack of growth and readiness or perhaps your fear of failure or success.

Everyone has the same amount of time in a day. A victim mindset espouses they don’t have enough time, on the other hand an accountable person acknowledges they are not using their time wisely, learns to re-prioritise and looks for the possibilities to grow and develop out of the pain. Turn mistakes into teachable moments.

“The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential… these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.” – Confucius

5. The loop of self-sabotage

Have you ever witnessed another person sabotage themselves because they are afraid of succeeding? They are over-committed to their identity, they discard what is working or not and playing safe far outweighs the risk. They will take a few steps forward, make progress toward their goal and right before breaking through that goal, they emotionally withdraw.

A clear cut example of self-sabotage is someone who is trying to start their own business. It doesn’t matter if they want to start an online course, consulting, or e-commerce business; self-sabotage loops can occur. You have to be mindful of this loop if you want to get out of it.

People will pull themselves back because they are driven by certainty and more comfortable with their past self rather than their future self. On a deeper level, it is easier for them to be unhappy than uncertain. Staying the same requires no effort. This mindset will keep you on the hamster wheel indefinitely.

To reverse the process and create long term sustainable happiness, you need to learn to dance with uncertainty and breakthrough the gates of unhappiness. When you expand your unfamiliar zone, you place yourself in challenging situations and that is where the growth comes from. You expand your thinking and strengthen your own internal belief. It’s your choice.

Distractions are part of everyday life and often, our thinking processes are distracted or constantly interrupted, leading to shallow rather than deep thinking. If our thinking is shallow, then it’s safe to say that perhaps our living is as well. Your ability to invest in deep thought, energy and time is being compromised by your choices you make in a distracted world.

When you invest your energy into everyday routine tasks of emails, meetings, calls and do not allocate time energy into immerse you into deep work where you create something of value, you are not tapping into your creativity and possibilities for innovation. Just a few seconds could change your whole life.

What are some negative habits holding you back? How will you get rid of/change them moving forward? Comment below!

Angela Kambouris used to work with high risk kids in the streets of Melbourne, now she has her own consultancy business and writes for large publications. As a leadership coach and business leader having spent over 20 years in the field of vulnerability and trauma, she has built a high-level career as an executive and transitioned into a business owner. She has spoken on stages and worked with thousands of people in self-development, leadership, mindset, human behavior and business. Love to travel, experience difference cultures and mastermind with leaders and expert authorities in personal development and business all over the world. Connect with her through her website http://angelakambouris.com/ or through her Facebook.

Success Advice

How Your Friends Determine Whether You Succeed or Not

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Can anyone do without having friends? We all have our friends, we share ideas with them, talk together, have fun, and fight. Yes, that’s the baseline of friendship. But, do you know that aside from you, your friends can determine whether you achieve success or not?

There are two things in friendship which are the ability to ”love” and the ability to “influence”. This means you are loved and you are influenced. How do your friends affect your success in life? How are they one of the biggest deciding factors of your success? Let’s find out.

What type of friends do you keep? 

First, what type of friends do you keep? Who do you call your best friend? There are two different kinds of friends, good friends, and bad ones. A lot of people have lost their pathway to success and some have also found their road to success all because of the friends they keep, the people they mingle with. 

Who is your best friend? Answer carefully. Having a best friend means you find each other compatible and understanding. Analyze who your best friend is. If your best friend has not motivated you to do something positive, if who you call your bestie has never given you positive advice, lastly if your best friend has never informed and advised you on your shortcomings, then you don’t have a best friend.

This quote tells us “birds of the same feather flock together”. Countless people have changed from their good nature into a bad one all because of friends. One thing to note is, “negative people move with negative aura”. If your best friend is filled with negativity inside-out then you will surely be affected by his/her negative aura.

They influence your success with positivity or negativity 

The friends you keep can either influence you with positivity or negativity because your friends have the power to change your kind of person completely. 

This is how your friends influence you:

  1. They influence you indirectly with what they do
  2. They influence you directly by teaching and giving you advice 

Yes, that is how they influence you. For instance, you watch a movie and you like the way the actor walks. The question is if you truly like the way the actor walks, won’t you try to imitate the actor? Of course, you will.

Just the way you imitate the actor is the same way your friends can influence you with their character. However, the funny part is, they don’t have to teach you to do things like them. You just find yourself imitating and copying them gradually.

An important question to ask is, are you imitating a good friend or a bad one? If you imitate a good friend then you will be good, but if you imitate a bad person, you will surely become a bad person.

Everyone wants to succeed, a good friend will always teach, enlighten, and motivate you for success. A bad friend will only motivate you to do evil things (smoking, drinking, fight, envy,).

And you should know that things like that are a great enemy of success and even of God. So, if you have these bad elements in your life, how will you achieve success? There is no way!

And also, they can teach and advise you directly. But, what do your friends teach you? When you ask them for advice do they inspire you positively or teach you the bad stuff.? A lot of people have regretted lifelong decisions just by listening to the advice of friends. 

The company you keep has the power to influence and change you. Never forget that a positive influence will teach, motivate, and brush you up for success. While a negative influence will inspire you to become a bad person, change your good nature, and leave you with regrets in the end.

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The 3 Step Process to Building a Profitable Pitch

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As a communication coach, one of the top questions entrepreneurs ask me is how to deliver a winning pitch to potential investors. They want to know if there’s a magic formula to get an investor to say yes and buy into their dream and their business. (more…)

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The 4 Pillars of Wealth and Abundance

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Have you ever wondered what the formula for a wealthy and abundant life is? Many people have. Lots has been written about the subject of wealth creation and living an abundant life. It was a breaking point in my journey and pursuit of success when I found out that there is a clear path to achieve success in life. Thanks to those who have shared their journey, we can clearly see and follow the principles of prosperity. (more…)

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Here Are 4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Podcast, Youtube Channel or Online Show

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Confidence comes from a place of strong understanding of self. After close to three years on radio, I’ve grown from a shy introvert to a shy introvert with an extrovert persona. When the mic is turned on, I can channel a version of myself that some say is attractive, strong, and of course, confident but it wasn’t always this way.

What I want to share with you is what I discovered on this journey into broadcast that you can apply to your life, your ventures, and your personal development. This doesn’t require any fancy gear. It does require a leap of faith on your part because once you go down the road of media; it can change your life.

1. Perceived Expertise

When you go to a doctor, you expect their knowledge will guide them to a solution to your problems. When you have a show, you become your listeners’ doctor. For all the multiple thousands, maybe millions, of YouTube channels, podcasts, and user-created content in the world, each person that gets behind a mic takes a position on their passion, their opinions, and their themes.

They challenge the status quo for the benefit of their listeners in hopes to entertain and educate. With consistency on your side, those fans place you on a platform and give you permission to influence them.

2. Global Acknowledgement

One of the benefits to increasing confidence is when you receive thank you notes from people you may never meet. The feeling of enriching someone’s life from halfway around the globe, provides validation you’re enhancing someone else’s life with your wisdom and your wit.

The very first time I was told I was making a difference in someone’s life in a country other than my own, I felt like I caused massive impact that transcends my circle of influence. When you experience just how much you can cause impact and it comes back to you, it’ll change your worldview.

“Be grateful for what you have and stop complaining – it bores everybody else, does you no good, and doesn’t solve any problems.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Backed By Numbers

One of the most exciting ways to measure success is to quantify your growth. It’s not enough to just broadcast. Having subscribers and downloads helps to know, numerically, how well you’re doing. Word of caution. This can be a way to set yourself up for distress because of number envy but if you understand what the numbers mean; you can control the narrative of the numbers.

The major number that makes most people smile is 10,000. I’d advise it to be 1. Here’s why. As you grow in your industry, so does your reach. If you learned that the one person that subscribed totally changed for the better because of you, wouldn’t that be worth the effort?

4. Effective Communication

While it’s not talked about much, having a show is documentation. You create a dynamic account of your life, your industry, and the pulse on what’s important simply by having a show. When you find a channel to improve your communication skills, you demand attention and people will listen to you. You become more trusted as a leader and people will follow you once they believe you can lead them to their wants and needs.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Tony Robbins

These insights have helped many people become leaders and, ultimately, move others to their best selves. It’s worked for me and I hope it works for you. At the end of the day, it’s all about showing up and showing out.

Have you ever thought about having a radio show? If so, what would you talk about? Let us below!

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