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4 Necessary Steps To Take And Break Negative Patterns

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How do you adopt negative or positive patterns? The first environment you experience is the one you were born to. You hear what others are saying, how they act, you experience their personality.

The way you think and act as you grow is shaped by your surroundings, no question about it. What many of us tend to do is carry habits from our childhood, many times not good habits. Of course, it depends on how you grew up as well.

Other “source” of harmful habits can come from our way of living. We get too comfortable, and before we know it, our bathroom scale was showing 50 pounds more than six months ago. You and I slip from time to time. Everyone does, we are humans. Having bad habits is natural, but it isn’t for life. You can eliminate them and grow at the same time.

Here are four practical steps you need to take to free yourself from negative patterns and make necessary changes:

1. Identify them

The first step you need to take is to recognize your negative habits. Look at your life. What is it you don’t like about yourself? Maybe you have taken an action and afterwards felt sorry. Maybe you don’t like your body. Are you constantly yelling at your kids and after feel guilty about it?

You have to find out exactly what it is you want to change and be clear with yourself. Do you drink too much and the day after you feel depressed and sad? Sit down and write it on a piece of paper. It will make you committed to the change you are about to take.

Be honest with yourself. No one is standing next to you and judging you. As I mentioned above, we all have bad habits. The point is to find it, see it, admit it to yourself.

“Most people don’t have that willingness to break bad habits. They have a lot of excuses and they talk like victims.” – Carlos Santana

2. Look at every unfavorable impact it has on you

So, now you know what drags you down. Now you see why you feel the way that you do. You are doing something in your life that doesn’t benefit you; it does the opposite. Face it. What has changed in your life since you adopted this pattern?  How does it make you feel? What are you missing on? How does it impact your days?

Put yourself in a state of total pain. Stop apologizing for your behavior and quit blaming others. This step is the one which will make you feel bad about yourself even more, but it is necessary to make it clear and see reality. You can only change if you are willing to stand face to face to the problem, identify it and make the firm decision to change it.

 

3. Imagine your life without it

You have passed the hard times. You took two of the most difficult steps, and you faced reality. I feel proud of you because I know it requires a lot of effort. Now use your entire imagination and visualize the positive outcome you’ll have once you make the necessary changes. How does it feel?

Do you feel the positive emotions going through your body? What you see now is the new

YOU. It is someone you will become if you are willing to take the challenge and change those negative patterns you have adopted. You are who you created.

Don’t ever put a label on yourself. You are not fat or moody or mean. It is only the way you act, not who you are.

 

4. Get to work

So you thought about everything, made yourself feel good and bad as well. Now it’s time to do something. The action is the step where many people fail. They desire to change and they talk about change but they never actually take a serious step towards it. Action means to implement your knowledge into practice.

Let me give you an example. In the past, I had temper issues. It affected my life and mostly, relationships with people around me. It became so painful for me that I knew I had to do something. The first step I took was to count to 10 every time I get angry. Sounds very simple but these baby steps taught me that everything is possible, and I can take control over my life and my attitude.

It is great that you realize what you do wrong but without appropriate action, you will see little results. Don’t procrastinate. Do you want to lose weight? Don’t wait until you buy a gym membership or you have day off from work. Put your sneakers on, go out and start running. Get the momentum.

“Everyone has been made for some particular work, and the desire for that work has been put in every heart.” – Rumi

Breaking negative patterns and being able to change means you are taking control of your life. Until you do that, life will control you whether you like it or not. Remember that only once you eliminate bad habits you have, you can live happy and joyful life. Everything is available to you; you just have to take the first step.

How are you going to break free from your negative patterns? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below!

Silvia committed her life to many things but one of them is helping people in turning their pain into power and teach them how to find benefits in the most difficult events of their lives. She is a motivational speaker and founder of CourageWithinYou platform.  She has written well over 200 articles oriented on personal development, success, and healthy mental growth. You can connect with her on Facebook or on her personal website www.silviaturon.com.

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How Your Friends Determine Whether You Succeed or Not

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Can anyone do without having friends? We all have our friends, we share ideas with them, talk together, have fun, and fight. Yes, that’s the baseline of friendship. But, do you know that aside from you, your friends can determine whether you achieve success or not?

There are two things in friendship which are the ability to ”love” and the ability to “influence”. This means you are loved and you are influenced. How do your friends affect your success in life? How are they one of the biggest deciding factors of your success? Let’s find out.

What type of friends do you keep? 

First, what type of friends do you keep? Who do you call your best friend? There are two different kinds of friends, good friends, and bad ones. A lot of people have lost their pathway to success and some have also found their road to success all because of the friends they keep, the people they mingle with. 

Who is your best friend? Answer carefully. Having a best friend means you find each other compatible and understanding. Analyze who your best friend is. If your best friend has not motivated you to do something positive, if who you call your bestie has never given you positive advice, lastly if your best friend has never informed and advised you on your shortcomings, then you don’t have a best friend.

This quote tells us “birds of the same feather flock together”. Countless people have changed from their good nature into a bad one all because of friends. One thing to note is, “negative people move with negative aura”. If your best friend is filled with negativity inside-out then you will surely be affected by his/her negative aura.

They influence your success with positivity or negativity 

The friends you keep can either influence you with positivity or negativity because your friends have the power to change your kind of person completely. 

This is how your friends influence you:

  1. They influence you indirectly with what they do
  2. They influence you directly by teaching and giving you advice 

Yes, that is how they influence you. For instance, you watch a movie and you like the way the actor walks. The question is if you truly like the way the actor walks, won’t you try to imitate the actor? Of course, you will.

Just the way you imitate the actor is the same way your friends can influence you with their character. However, the funny part is, they don’t have to teach you to do things like them. You just find yourself imitating and copying them gradually.

An important question to ask is, are you imitating a good friend or a bad one? If you imitate a good friend then you will be good, but if you imitate a bad person, you will surely become a bad person.

Everyone wants to succeed, a good friend will always teach, enlighten, and motivate you for success. A bad friend will only motivate you to do evil things (smoking, drinking, fight, envy,).

And you should know that things like that are a great enemy of success and even of God. So, if you have these bad elements in your life, how will you achieve success? There is no way!

And also, they can teach and advise you directly. But, what do your friends teach you? When you ask them for advice do they inspire you positively or teach you the bad stuff.? A lot of people have regretted lifelong decisions just by listening to the advice of friends. 

The company you keep has the power to influence and change you. Never forget that a positive influence will teach, motivate, and brush you up for success. While a negative influence will inspire you to become a bad person, change your good nature, and leave you with regrets in the end.

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The 3 Step Process to Building a Profitable Pitch

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As a communication coach, one of the top questions entrepreneurs ask me is how to deliver a winning pitch to potential investors. They want to know if there’s a magic formula to get an investor to say yes and buy into their dream and their business. (more…)

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The 4 Pillars of Wealth and Abundance

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Have you ever wondered what the formula for a wealthy and abundant life is? Many people have. Lots has been written about the subject of wealth creation and living an abundant life. It was a breaking point in my journey and pursuit of success when I found out that there is a clear path to achieve success in life. Thanks to those who have shared their journey, we can clearly see and follow the principles of prosperity. (more…)

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Here Are 4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Podcast, Youtube Channel or Online Show

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why you should have a podcast
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Confidence comes from a place of strong understanding of self. After close to three years on radio, I’ve grown from a shy introvert to a shy introvert with an extrovert persona. When the mic is turned on, I can channel a version of myself that some say is attractive, strong, and of course, confident but it wasn’t always this way.

What I want to share with you is what I discovered on this journey into broadcast that you can apply to your life, your ventures, and your personal development. This doesn’t require any fancy gear. It does require a leap of faith on your part because once you go down the road of media; it can change your life.

1. Perceived Expertise

When you go to a doctor, you expect their knowledge will guide them to a solution to your problems. When you have a show, you become your listeners’ doctor. For all the multiple thousands, maybe millions, of YouTube channels, podcasts, and user-created content in the world, each person that gets behind a mic takes a position on their passion, their opinions, and their themes.

They challenge the status quo for the benefit of their listeners in hopes to entertain and educate. With consistency on your side, those fans place you on a platform and give you permission to influence them.

2. Global Acknowledgement

One of the benefits to increasing confidence is when you receive thank you notes from people you may never meet. The feeling of enriching someone’s life from halfway around the globe, provides validation you’re enhancing someone else’s life with your wisdom and your wit.

The very first time I was told I was making a difference in someone’s life in a country other than my own, I felt like I caused massive impact that transcends my circle of influence. When you experience just how much you can cause impact and it comes back to you, it’ll change your worldview.

“Be grateful for what you have and stop complaining – it bores everybody else, does you no good, and doesn’t solve any problems.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Backed By Numbers

One of the most exciting ways to measure success is to quantify your growth. It’s not enough to just broadcast. Having subscribers and downloads helps to know, numerically, how well you’re doing. Word of caution. This can be a way to set yourself up for distress because of number envy but if you understand what the numbers mean; you can control the narrative of the numbers.

The major number that makes most people smile is 10,000. I’d advise it to be 1. Here’s why. As you grow in your industry, so does your reach. If you learned that the one person that subscribed totally changed for the better because of you, wouldn’t that be worth the effort?

4. Effective Communication

While it’s not talked about much, having a show is documentation. You create a dynamic account of your life, your industry, and the pulse on what’s important simply by having a show. When you find a channel to improve your communication skills, you demand attention and people will listen to you. You become more trusted as a leader and people will follow you once they believe you can lead them to their wants and needs.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Tony Robbins

These insights have helped many people become leaders and, ultimately, move others to their best selves. It’s worked for me and I hope it works for you. At the end of the day, it’s all about showing up and showing out.

Have you ever thought about having a radio show? If so, what would you talk about? Let us below!

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