Motivation
5 Steps To Stay Motivated In Times Of Uncertainty
It was a Saturday morning, sunny and relatively warm even though it was the middle of winter. Driving toward the highway, I reminded myself to rehearse my elevator pitch a few more times before that morning’s networking meeting.
But before I could rehearse my pitch, I spotted a “Going-Out-of-Business Sale” sign at one of my favorite shops. I sighed. Another business who had failed! I thought of the somber statistics I had read on several Internet sites: on average, 8 out of 10 businesses are doomed to fail. A chill settled in my gut.
What if my business became one of the losers? What I failed? And if I had such a high chance of failing, was it even worth it to spend my Saturday at a networking meeting? Why bother? That’s when I realized that the uncertainty of my future was putting my motivation—and confidence—at risk.
If you feel that your uncertain future might be hurting your motivation, you might benefit from these 5 steps:
1. Create a list of positive and negative scenarios
I wrote 5 possible scenarios, ranked from “Life Is Perfect” to “What a Nightmare!” My immediate reaction to the worst-case scenario was that the chances of it happening were ridiculously low, which made me feel safer.
You, too, might realize that a disaster scenario, while probable, is not the most likely to materialize. This encouraging realization will allow you to keep going with a much more positive mindset.
“See the positive side, the potential, and make an effort.” – Dalai Lama
2. Write the possible consequences of each scenario
Listing all possible scenarios isn’t enough. I expanded my list by imagining what would happen if each of the 5 possible scenarios came true. This objective assessment was a powerful way to pinpoint potential obstacles to overcome in case of a least-desirable scenario. It was also a gauge of the delightful results I would realize if things went according to plan.
Start with the worst possible scenario and work your way up to the best. If you end this exercise by imagining the wonderful life that awaits you if you’re successful, you’ll spark positive momentum to skyrocket your motivation.
3. Devise a plan to avoid possible problems
Lack of foresight is one of the most common precursors of failure. Knowing this, I listed all the action steps I need to take to avoid the 2 worst case scenarios. Because I knew the problems that could potentially arise, I was in a great position to prepare for these challenges and avoid them altogether.
It’s your turn to be proactive. Create a comprehensive list of action steps you will follow to avoid possible issues in the future, and leave time in your schedule to execute these action steps. Seek outside help if you need it.
Being prepared will not only minimize your chances of failure, but will motivate you to keep working hard to achieve what you desire.
4. Create a worst-case scenario strategy
Having an exit strategy is a key to succeed in business—and in life. I asked myself, “What will I do if the worst happens?” I created a detailed “Plan B” that would also allow me to use my gifts and live my passion.
What would you do if things went wrong? Don’t focus on the unwanted results. Instead, place your attention of alternatives that would, in the end, also lead to fulfillment and satisfaction. Keep the end goal in mind but also keep an open mind.
This is a powerful exercise that will temper your feeling of uncertainty. You will feel safe and encouraged. You’ll know that a deviation from your original plan is not a failure. Instead, it’s an opportunity to explore a whole new set of possibilities.
5. List the times things worked out exactly the way you wanted them
To no avail, I tried to find a time in my life when my future was 100% predictable. That’s when it hit me. Life is never certain, and that’s what makes it exciting!
Remember that you have learned and grown as a person because of life’s endless surprises. Some of those surprises will be pleasant, and some will not. But in the end, you are who you are today as a result of your life experiences.
In a few words, certainty is an illusion. This is a profound realization that will help you look at the future without fear.
“Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.” -Winston Churchill
Follow the 5 steps above to keep your motivation reserves healthy and plentiful, and continue taking daily, focused steps to design a successful and fulfilling life!
How do you stay motivated in times of uncertainty? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below!
Yes, we do feel motivated by reading quotes and watching movies like The Pursuit of Happiness and Soul Surfer. The protagonist makes you feel you are the hero as psychology would call this Experience-taking. However, sometimes these things are not enough to drive you to accomplish your goals and dreams.
Our mind and body wants peace, yet a lack of inspiration shouldn’t slow us down. We wait to be inspired and get no work done because of it.
Is inspiration important to make us successful in our lives? Yes, because it acts as a trigger for the shotgun as it initiates the very vital ‘Beginning Process’ of which we are frightened to jump upon.
What exactly should you do when you lack the inspiration? Read the 5 points below:
1. Meditation Matters
You don’t need to do deep meditation wherein you train your mind to attain the desired state of consciousness. Meditation involves analyzing all kinds of emotions like anger, hatred, compassion, and love. According to many psychological studies, it is revealed meditation drastically minimizes anxiety and stabilizes cognitive ability.
It not only allows you to become inspired but keeps your body physically fit. Today, people are suffering from mental illness like depression. Even when someone is stressed, it is hard to get inspired. If you are a beginner in meditation, you can still experience results. It eradicates all the hindrances that come in the way by calming us down. It is no revelation you perform better when you are relaxed and mindful.
If you are new to meditation check out the iOS app Calm and Android app Headspace. Using proven meditation and mindfulness techniques, these mobile applications train your mind for a healthier, and happier life.
“Quiet the mind, and the soul will speak.” – Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati
2. Pausing Social Media
From your smartphone to your computer, shut everything off and give yourself a needed and short break. Remember, there were no mobile devices 100 years ago so people had to find different ways of entertainment. Perhaps, talk to an old friend or ask the cute girl out in your class.
The psychology today surveyed 100 individuals of which 50 were given all the digital facilities and 50 were provided only the required devices. After the experiment, it was proved that the later group did 85% more effective work than the former. Digital Media is becoming crowded and constrained, so do not forget to stop and pause from time to time.
3. Take a Chill-pill
In our current culture, people seem to be rushing and hustling to get things done, andthey don’t take the time to give their body and brain much-needed rest. According to Phyllis Korkki, a writer for the NY Times, “Employees generally need to detach from their workspace to recharge their internal resources that provide cognitive recharging.”
According to Beth W. Orenstein of Everyday Fitness, “It is easy to get frustrated when we feel uninspired. When these moments come, it is often a good idea to take a break for a few days. Sometimes your mind just needs a break from all the noise and hustle.” We must realize if we don’t rest, our bodies and minds will have no time to recharge, and our inspiration levels will lower down.
“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.” – Jim Goodwin
4. Miracles of Music
This is a head and heart combo, because scientifically, when you listen to your favorite music the soothing effect connects your brain and conscience emphatically. Maybe all you need is a soft jazz (it’s okay if your genre is a heavy metal) to get you out of your creative funk. Music does have a large influence on your emotions. Maybe you’re having a bad day and it is affecting your working ability. Listening to your favorite song might lift your mood and thus allow you to be more productive, innovative and creative in what you will do.
5. Shout out loud
Scientists bring this factor out frequently because people today don’t share their stuff. Their mind becomes a locker room where junk is stored, yet this garbage has to be removed. This negativity can and strain can be abolished when you shout loudly (at a place far which is calm and quiet).
Next time you feel uninspired, try attempting any of the above and you will be surprised how effective it works, because as psychologists say, “Human Beings came with a manual. All you need to know is how to read it.”
What are some ways you find inspiration? Let us know by commenting below!
Image courtesy of Twenty20.com
We all start somewhere. We may not know what our dream is to begin with.
This was certainly the case for me back in 2011. I’d hit rock bottom and everything in my life had gone wrong. There was no meaning in anything I was doing and I didn’t know why I existed. I had no dream and zero goals other than to survive the day.
My anxiety and stress levels were so high at that point in my life that just getting to go to bed at night was good enough.
So how do we begin anything?
I believe the way we begin is often by accident. We don’t always know when an idea is going to hit us or our life is going to change. For me, I certainly had no clue. My life up until that fateful day was spent chasing money and things that I thought mattered.
These were not things that mattered to me; they were things that mattered to society. Getting to where I was on that day was a complete accident. I always thought I was going to be this big time businessman importing stuff from China.
I thought that because I was born in the lucky country of Australia that I was entitled to success. This fateful day would soon teach me how wrong I was.
“Being wrong is often where it starts. Being wrong is where the accident of your success journey can begin”
There is one common trigger
That trigger is a low point where you decide that enough is enough. It often all begins when your pain levels reach and extreme point. It feels like your life is going to implode and that if you died tomorrow, it wouldn’t even matter.
My low point in 2011 became the defining moment where everything changed. I was not purposeful about my new path, but I had definitely had enough. Many of us get this same trigger. What I’ve found is that too many of us don’t use it. These low points are a gift and when you come face to face with one, you need to make the most of it.
These low points are the motivation and change in mindset that you need. I took my sign that my life needed to change and became obsessed.
What does the start of the journey look like?
It doesn’t look all that flash to begin with. The start of a journey towards success never does look amazing.
Mine was so simple it almost seems make-believe. I want to describe it for you in extreme detail so you can see just how simple it was.
On that fateful day where everything collapsed, I made a very small decision. It’s probably the smallest change in my life I have ever made. This decision changed everything.
“All I did was decide to walk around the neighborhood block, where I lived, once per day”
The duration was so short that it was impossible not to do. At this stage in my life, I was not conscious of anything and knew nothing about success or psychology.
I did this walk for a few days and then my mind told me that I wasn’t maximising the time. See, I am one of those crazy people who always has to be hyper productive. In this case, my hyper-productive mind was the greatest gift I had been given.
The next part is still a bit blurry. Having had no clue what to do other than doing my daily walk, I did what all millennials do: I asked Google for answers. I’m not sure what the series of search terms was that led me to Tony Robbins, nor do I care.
Once I found a Tony Robbins video on Youtube, I became hooked. All the answers I was seeking became instantly available to me. At this point, I turned into a total freak.
I got my iPod, downloaded a whole bunch of Tony Robbins audiotapes, and went for a walk every single day. Many of these walks became longer than one hour. I walked as fast as I could and I had a look of determination on my face that made me look like I had been possessed by the devil.
So the turning point was really these walks, combined with listening to audiotapes.
What does all of this mean for you?
That’s a damn good question cowboy. What it means for you is that you may be over thinking your next move. Your next move needs to be a decision. I recommend making lots of small decisions and trying many new things.
The thing that will take you on the next journey that could lead to your life’s purpose and / or dream is probably way simpler than you think. As humans, we over think success and we look for gianormous triggers or external factors before we’re willing to make a decision.
I believe it’s the small decisions that help you begin. It’s the little things you’re dismissing like taking a walk around the neighborhood block that could potentially change your circumstances.
Finding that trigger or habit is not enough
Even if you discover something like walking, which has a major effect on you, it’s not enough. You still need to get off your ass and make a decision. What is that decision you ask?
That decision is to no longer to accept your current results. It’s a decision to cut off from everything else and become intensely focused on one pursuit. If all you do is find a new habit that keeps you in the same rut you’ve been in, you’ll never start your own journey.
I used to be so lazy, indecisive and lack discipline. These were the traits that were holding me back. On many of these walks I went on, I decided that I’d no longer settle for these loser behaviors.
See yourself for what you can become, not who you currently are
“When you begin a new road towards success, you have to think of yourself differently. You absolutely must see yourself as who you can become and not who you currently are”
During my transformation, I focused on all the potential that I had and what I would look like in the future. I thought about standing on stages in front of thousands of people and doing something that filled me with joy and passion. I saw videos of thought leaders like Eric Thomas and told myself that I could live my life at the same level.
To this day, those thoughts have never left me and I never will let them go. Until you’ve been all the way to the lowest of lows, you’ll never know what it’s like to dream big.
You have so much more within you. Yes, people will laugh at you and think you’re dumb. The only reason they think like that is because they are pissed off at their own failures and misfortunes.
Going to Mars
Let me give you an example of people not believing. I’m coaching this young kid right now and he had the idea to take his product to Mars. When he told me that, he thought I’d laugh like everyone else. What he didn’t expect was for me to encourage him.
I told him that if he truly believed that his product could be on Mars, that he should shout it from the rooftop. I told him that he should look people in the eye and tell them he was going to Mars with his product!
If he focuses on who he is right now – a young kid with no money, no work experience and no product – he would never get started.
If he believed all the critics who have never achieved any such goal as going to Mars, he’d never begin.
The way to begin is not just to make a decision, but be bold and believe in yourself. You must believe before anyone will believe in what you’re starting.
If that means you are going to take your product to Mars then so be it.
***Final words***
Don’t let any outside force stop you from beginning any longer. You’ve wasted enough time as it is and life is too short to waste any more time. Go out there and begin. The start is always the hardest part, but it’s also the most rewarding.
Remember what I said before: the beginning will be made up of a few very small decisions and actions. Don’t look for that massive defining moment because chances are it will never come.
Get started right now and believe you were born to do something incredible. We’re all capable of greatness once we find a way to begin. Beginning the journey is where it all starts. No one knows what the end will look like and that’s half the fun.
Time to take the first step.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
Today was one of the best days of my life.
The last month, in fact, has been a dream. I’ve had to pinch myself to make sure I am not fantasizing about what I am experiencing.
The last year has been full of very hard work, lots of tears, a rollercoaster of emotions, forgiveness and gratitude.
I’ve recently got the career opportunities I’ve wanted, I’ve been able to get better at public speaking, my writing has been read more than ever and I have some amazing new friends. I’m not saying this to brag because that is definitely not me; I’m saying it to inspire you to have your own best day.
To have the best day of your life, you must setup your life the way you want it.
Decide on what you want
This fantastic day didn’t happen to me by accident. I earned every minute of it through my efforts. Those emotions I spoke about are what gave me the energy to power towards this phenomenal day.
I decided what I wanted. I painted a rough picture and focused on how I wanted to feel more than anything. Trying to be too exact can often put this goal of an ideal day too far into the future that you never get to touch it with your two beautiful hands.
“You’ll know when you have made the right set of decisions because each day will get closer to being your best day”
You’ll feel a shift in your psychology, your emotions and the presence you give to other people. You’ll start noticing that people compliment you a lot on the positivity you make them feel.
Positivity is infectious and it’s how you get the courage to make the right decisions that will give you the end result which is your best day.
The best day is often the simplest
You don’t need to fly to the moon and back to experience the best day of your life. What’s crazy is that your best day is simplistic. Your best day is unique to you and no two best days are alike.
My best day was dumb as hell. I spent time with a magnificent person, ate healthy food, enjoyed the sunshine and realized that I’ve become a champion in my own eyes (in my humble opinion).
Breaking the groove is the key
Days will flow into years without you realizing unless you stop your mind in its tracks.
Breaking the groove of your boredom and habits that don’t serve you, will allow you to get closer to your best day. During your best day, you’re present and fully aware of everything that’s going on.
Your best day is not about being productive; it’s about living in the moment and being happy and grateful for everything your best day has brought you.
“Until you get out of your messed up routine that has put you into a landslide of nothingness, you’ll continually miss every opportunity to have your best day and then repeat it for the future”
Routine is not all it’s cracked up to be. Routine has got you to where you are. It may be time to break it into little, tiny pieces.
Every day can be extraordinary
I’m not at this level yet but I know people who are. What if the circumstances of your day didn’t get in the way of it being mind-blowing? What if all you had to do was develop enough of a positive mindset to see mostly good things happening?
Being inspired, like how I’ve just described, is possible. Anything is possible when you believe it is. Each day can be your best day once you get on a roll. Before you can do that, you need to know what your best day feels like. Once you get a taste of it, you should have the drug that will get you addicted.
The people who I’ve seen have the best day, every day, have four main traits:
– They practice nonreactivity
– They find happiness in the littlest things
– They write down three things they’re grateful for every 24 hours
– Their default facial expression is a smile
Try and outdo yourself
Okay, so I have had one of my best days. Do I stop here and say “Yay I won?” Hell no brothers and sisters. The goal is to make your life into something that feels like that best day, every day. Writing down your best day is crucial because you’ll be surprised how easily you forget the contents and feelings of that day.
When you reminisce on that day, try only to do one thing: remember how you felt. For me, today, I felt confident, relaxed, inspired, happy and loved all at once. It’s the best feeling in the world and almost impossible to describe fully in words.
The whole challenge of describing my best day is how I know that I’ve hit a peak in my life.
At the top of the mountain, you feel like nothing can take you down. From this position, you feel like you can help so many people to live an inspired life.
Emotion starts to drive you and you concentrate on the way you make people feel rather than trying to be cool or sound smart / funny. The world, after your best day, will never be the same again.
You’ll have a permanent high to reflect on.
You’ll know what it’s like to have truly lived.
What’s important will finally become clear to you.
You’ll have ridiculous clarity on where you are going to spend your time.
It’s your turn
You’ve heard about my best day, now I want you to have yours. I want you to hit a new record in the story of your life. Having the best day of your life is possible for all of us. It’s not a far away land that we can never reach. It’s not a land that can only be reached on a golden chariot.
Today I’ve had my best day. Today I want you to have your best day. Your best day is where you show everybody the best of you. It’s where you show us all what you’ve been up to behind closed doors.
Your best day is where you get to celebrate, knowing that you’ve become someone you can be proud of. It’s your turn to have the best day of your life.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
For this entire year, I have been asked why I have zero goals.
That’s right. You heard right. I write all about personal development and how to be a better version of you and yet I have no goals for this year. You must think I’m a total screw up and a liar / cheat. You must think that I am completely incongruent.
How can you be successful if you have zero goals?
Okay, I left out one important detail. I decided this year to have only one mission and zero goals. Having a single mission means I can be completely focused, rather than get caught up in a blaze of half done goals. See the thing is I would rather achieve one massive, ginormous mission that means the world to me.
I am not interested in doing anything else other than playing life all out and you shouldn’t be either. There’s no point in being mediocre. Mediocre leads to an unfulfilling life and I can’t settle for that. In fact, I can’t settle for second best and you shouldn’t do that either.
Second best leads to regret and that feels like total crap to me. I don’t want to feel like that. The only way I can live the life I want to lead is to be nothing short of inspirational. This means I have to make all of you reading actually take action and execute like you never have before.
“This requires me to go first. This is because leaders go first and they eat their dinner last”
A brief interlude…Tracy Morgan
I’ve just finished listening to a podcast about the famous comedian Tracy Morgan. I’ve never taken him very seriously until the man made me cry like a baby this morning. The man was in a bad car accident and nearly died. He came out the other side having realized what his goal is.
His goal is to love people and show us how to do the same through his comedy. That’s his entire goal. He doesn’t write goal lists or live some crazy morning ritual. His ritual is a single mission and a single goal.
There is something about having a single mission that is so damn motivational in itself. It’s simple and easy to execute on just one thing. We all do such a poor job at trying to juggle multiple balls.
“What if all you needed to do was juggle one ball at a time while taking part in life’s circus”
Through the tears I shed by listening to Tracy be the opposite of funny for a brief moment, I finally understood that our life purpose is our single mission. Our life purpose is that one big mission that we should focus all of our attention on.
As we go through life, our mission can change but our purpose does not. Whatever your mission is and whatever way you find to serve people, you’ll eventually realize that you must love people and show them how to do the same.
Now to be vulnerable
The mission I wanted to achieve this year was to find an amazing woman. I’ve turned down every other offer and every business proposal to do just that. Everyone who knows me knows this mission. It’s written everywhere. It’s spoken about more than one hundred times per day.
If I liked tattoos, I’d probably get it stamped on my arm so I don’t forget it. It’s not easy to admit to the world that I’m trying to find a woman. Generally, people keep this sort of thing behind closed doors and rarely speak about it. It’s a secret mission that shows me that we’re all the same.
So I thought screw it. I’m either going to live what I preach and be honest, otherwise what’s the point?
Why bother writing these words if I’m going to hide behind some corporate mask trying to be someone I’m not. There’s something so freeing about sharing your single mission for the year.
Focus is king
By having one mission for this year, it’s made life crystal clear. When I thought about taking a holiday, I said no. When an opportunity to join a business venture came up, I said no. When I was asked to speak about what I do, I said no.
It’s hard to say no. I’ve found that it’s easier to say no when you have a single mission. You don’t feel regret because you have focused all of your energy on just one thing. I feel that simplicity is so freeing and that’s one of the reasons why I live a minimalistic life.
I want to save my mind for my life’s purpose and not waste thinking capacity on having 101 goals that are not that important to me. This advice might seem counter intuitive to every other self-help blog post, book, video you’ve ever seen. So what? Think about it carefully and it will make sense.
Big goals take enormous energy
Imagine the rejection, negativity, hard work and vulnerability it takes to find a woman for a second. I can tell you that it takes everything you’ve got. If you don’t give it all, then you don’t get the result. This year I knew that I wouldn’t have the energy to achieve my one big mission unless I deleted everything else.
You piss a lot of people off when you do this, but they eventually forgive you. The ones who don’t weren’t your true supporters anyway. The reason I have the energy to deal with so many negative emotions is that I’ve stored up massive reserves, by having no other goals.
The most fatiguing part of having one big mission rather than lots of goals is the decision making that comes with it. Making decisions drains your energy so by not having lots of goals I can concentrate my decision making muscle on only things that are relevant to my mission.
Through the process, I’ve simplified other parts of my life to compound my energy reserves further. I try to have a basic wardrobe, eat similar meals most days, have very few emails, have one place to post my blog articles and so on.
The truth that will set you free
Here it is: you’re distracted, over worked and not focused on what matters to you.
That’s a very harsh thing to say but it’s true. Riding along the highway with just one goal for a year allows you to reset. You may not live this way forever although I think it’s good to try it out on a major goal that seems to escape you continually.
Being true to yourself and forgiving yourself for your past failures will allow you to start fresh. This time, start fresh on a single goal that is a must for you.
When a goal becomes a must, and you’ve diverted all your energy towards it, you’ll see the results you’ve always longed for.
“Take that single mission and slap it over the head until you get the monkey off your back that is distraction and complication”
Narrow down, chunk it down and show us all how to love people. Don’t stop until you get what you want. When you get it, remember to be grateful.
Wish me luck with my mission. Peace. Big, scary world I’m coming for you!
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
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My Incredibly Simple Guide To Stoicism – Learn Practical Wisdom You Can Use
I’ve been inspired to learn about Stoicism for a while.
The problem I’ve had is that it’s one of those topics that people love to complicate. The reason for the complication is that many of the teachings that come from Stoicism are spoken in English from a long time ago. I personally don’t have the patience to read this type of writing for long periods.
That’s why I’m going to debunk Stoicism for you in stupidly simple terms. The wisdom you get will transform you. You’ll gain a different perspective that will help you in all aspects of life.
“Everyone is preaching advice, but no one is sharing wisdom – that’s what Stoicism is”
What is Stoicism?
It’s an ancient form of philosophy. It was made famous in recent years again by Tim Ferriss and Ryan Holiday from the USA. These two gentleman credit a lot of their success to the wisdom that Stoicism taught them.
Stoicism began on a stoa which means porch to you and I. A stoa is where the early teachings of Stoicism started.
Here is Stoicism broken down into insanely simple dot points:
– Stoicism is focused on uncomplicated theories of life
– Stoicism is so clear that you can take action from the advice immediately
– Study is not required to understand Stoicism
– The most read Stoic is Lucius Seneca. Marcus Aurelius is also very popular
Stoicism doesn’t focus on the negative like modern-day self-help advice does. Stoicism is more a meditative practice that allows us to take the negative feelings we experience, and turn them into thoughts that give us peacefulness and perspective on life.
The most important part of learning Stoicism is having the right state of mind. Just like in life, the right state of mind can help us look at challenges in the best possible way.
At the crux of Stoicism is a list of reminders and words of wisdom that show how to live a good life. It’s not an argument about what is right and what is wrong. The Stoics had no time for this way of thinking.
Okay so now let’s skip ahead to the best lessons you can learn from Stoicism:
We don’t control events, but we do control what they mean.
This is a famous teaching from a lot of Tony Robbins work too. Everything that happens in your life can be controlled by your own mind to be good or bad. Once you understand this teaching, you can take back the power. You become less reactive and a lot calmer. You have the upper hand.
Disruptions to serenity cannot be avoided.
Tranquillity can never be reached by avoiding or blocking out distractions or horrible events. The way to get to that tranquil place is through your choices and judgment about those events and situations.
You must disrupt yourself.
Doing things the way they’ve always been done will lead you to be disrupted by someone or something who changes with the environment. Operating out of habit means you’ve stopped thinking and are mindlessly drifting through life. This means you’re not in control.
“When you lose control, your environment determines your results”
There’s a good chance that you’re going to think these results suck. The lesson here is break your habits, get out of your comfort zone and disrupt yourself like a cool, hip startup from Silicon Valley.
In good and bad times we have a choice.
Whether you’re in jail or an entrepreneur running the most successful startup on the planet, you have a choice. We all come from different backgrounds and we’ll all go through major highs, and painstaking lows. Through all of these different circumstances, we have a choice.
It’s having the freedom of choice that will set us free in the long run. It’s that freedom of choice that will ensure you don’t waste your life away thinking about stuff you can’t control. You’ll always feel the power of freedom when you control your choices, no matter what life throws at you.
Make it a habit of looking inward.
Stoics are obsessed with taking time to look inward. It’s something they advocate above all of their other teachings. They suggest spending time in the morning to ask yourself questions about your life. As you do this, you’ll find the answers to life’s biggest questions become clearer in the context of your own life.
Looking inward helps you find the answers that you knew all along and thought were hidden inside of someone else, or something else. This practice will only work if you’re honest with yourself. Don’t be too brutal on yourself either. Realize that we all start somewhere and it’s where we can go that is the greatest gift we can enjoy.
Being paranoid and fearful will destroy you.
The antidote to fear and paranoia is self-control. Learn to control your impulses. If you become fearful that others will sabotage your success and you don’t remain in control over these fearful thoughts, you’ll lose sight of reality. These fearful thoughts will cause you to project your fears onto other people and they’ll give you exactly what you fear.
In simple terms, fear is a self-fulfilling prophecy. What you put out comes right back at you.
Anger will not help you.
The Stoics believe that getting angry never gives you anything in return. Anger wastes your precious energy and resources, and provides no tangible benefit. This is why it’s better to practice non-reactivity rather than being pissed off at something you can’t control anyway.
Anger is like a contagious virus that spreads if you let it. Don’t let anger control you. Projecting anger on people can only result in you projecting anger on yourself. That’s why anger is also another self-fulfilling prophecy.
Everything takes up space.
Seneca wrote many times that even things you get for free have a cost. That cost is space – space in your garage or even space in your mind.
“Learning to live with less will create space in your life for the things that truly matter to you”
The aim of the game is to look at your material possession and be honest with yourself: do you really need that object? If the answer is no, free some space up in your life. What Seneca says here is the reason I have personally given away and sold most of my possessions. I’ve never been happier.
Practice poverty.
Especially during prosperous times in your life, the Stoics believe you should practice poverty. This is how you prepare for hardship and become an expert in dealing with the ups and downs of life. Comfort can become a form of slavery because you consistently start to think that someone could take away what you have.
When you’re familiar with what you fear, it no longer controls you. The worst can happen and you go through it with a sense of calmness and ease. People think you’re resilient but actually, you’ve just practiced the hard times as preparation.
Quick tip: try eating a really cheap meal for a whole week every two months. Eat like you have almost no money. This will teach you to not only appreciate the nice meals but to be okay if you ever face poverty and have to live on very little money for a while. I know a few people that do a beans and rice meal for this week of living it rough. Try it!
You protect everything you have, why not your mind?
You don’t give away your wallet to a stranger on the street. You don’t hand the keys to your car over to a budding thief. You wouldn’t let your house be demolished by the council without a fight. So why would you hand over the keys to your mind so easily to any stranger who wants them?
You have to become aware of who you are unconsciously giving your mind over to. You need to realize who is influencing you in a negative way without knowing it.
“Your mind can create all the abundance you could ever imagine, so you need to protect it like it’s the only possession you have”
Don’t wreck the purpose of your life by trying to impress others.
The Stoics teach that the opinions of people you seek our to impress are not that great themselves. These people you seek to impress have addictions, their own problems, and are no wiser than the next person. The purpose of your life is not to impress people and doing so will have the opposite effect.
Focus on impressing yourself through personal growth and wisdom from people who serve the greater good. Go beyond yourself and avoid the need to seek approval. Take action and seek forgiveness later if you must.
Without proper training, you’re a fool.
If you seek to master a skill, then without proper training you will (by default) rely on ignorance, and you’ll act in a way that lacks discipline and requires chance.
“An investor without discipline is not an investor – he’s a gambler” – Ryan Holiday
Your mind becomes what you think consistently.
Whether you think mostly negative thoughts or positive thoughts will determine your default response to any situation. The more we practice negative thinking, the more likely we are to see the world as negative.
If we choose to practice nothing, then we also get the same outcome of an influx of negative thoughts. The only wise choice then is to practice seeing the good in everything. Start with being grateful
You don’t know everything.
This is a thought that many people secretly have when they claim they want to learn something new. The harsh reality is that many of us walk around as though we know everything. We know nothing of the infinite knowledge there is to acquire.
That sort of humbleness is where all the best learning starts from. Thinking less of yourself is the ultimate power: it’s where you can grow from and serve others. It’s this way of thinking that births leaders.
Think of your problems in relation to the sky.
Marcus Aurelius says that the stars wash away the dust of earthly life. This Stoic concept is a way for you to clear your mind of all the troubles you encounter day-to-day. In comparison, your problems are so small compared to the immense size of the universe.
Your problems don’t matter in the grand scheme of things so don’t fool yourself into believing they do. Look at the stars once in a while. Remember how lucky we are even to experience this planet we call Earth.
Forget stereotypes and labels: concentrate on character.
Stoics believe your character should be your most prominent feature. Outward traits such as skin color and clothing should be insignificant. Your character is defined by the work you do on yourself each day and the person you become.
Your character is what sells you as a person better than any other external force. Your character is your legacy. Your character is what you want to be known for.
Don’t sit on the sidelines. Do something inspirational yourself.
You can sit here all day and listen to me inspire you. You can watch all the inspirational videos that Youtube has to offer. What would be far better is to go out there and inspire people yourself rather than being inspired.
Take the inspiration you’ve gathered in your life and do something with it so you can allow others to create their own inspirational journey. Be the example rather than only listening to the example and saying “One day I’ll do that.”
There is never an end to the personal development journey.
You never reach mastery. The student never stops being a student. Even the teacher is still a student at heart. Stoicism is something you apply consistently, and it never ends. You apply it until the day you die and that’s how you gain the infinite wisdom it offers.
“You’ll never drink all the water in the ocean, just like you’ll never learn everything there is to know about Stoic philosophy and that’s fine too”
Work is good for you.
Ever heard that when people retire, they are statistically more likely to die within a few years of achieving this milestone in their life? That’s because work gives us a sense of purpose. Work gives us a reason to get up in the morning. Making progress through doing meaningful work feels good.
Too much idle time and the delusion that you can get rich and sit on a beach is what can cause you to feel empty inside. This feeling can cause you to have self-destructive thoughts that lead to an immense focus on one’s selfish desires and need for significance. In other words, work is good.
Don’t make life harder than it is. It’s your choice.
Choices are what stoics believe are the way to take a shortcut in life. They believe we can choose whatever we want including happiness, freedom, respect and feelings of being wealthy. The reoccurring theme here again is that we are in control of everything that happens and how we feel.
How you handle disaster is everything.
The way you deal with problematic situations is a true test of your character. Character in stoicism is not formed when everything is going right; character is formed when everything is going wrong. Don’t let problems spoil your mindset. Let optimism guide you in all situations.
Seek out obstacles.
Obstacles are a way for you to take a challenge that you may not like and use it as a lesson that can help you for the rest of your life. You learn from hardships above all else. Lessons from hardships make you smarter, stronger and better prepared for when adversity strikes again.
You have one job and only one job.
The Stoics have a core belief that all of us have only one job on Planet Earth: to be a good human being. If you learned nothing else about stoicism from this blog post, then I’ve succeeded.
Practice being a good human being and you’ll have one hell of a life.
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Excellent article. I loved phrases like Certainty is an illusion. Worst-case scenario action steps. This piece of advice will be very useful to every entrepreneur.
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Cloris, your articles are excellent .You are very smart. I enjoy your comments about Donald Trump are great. Being a successful person, like you has an important message: Never stop
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Very sound advice Cloris! As both you and Bertie’s comment point out – much of the pain of “failure” is due to the shock of unanticipated developments. With a plan like you’ve described here, you’ve considered the best and worst case scenarios and the implications, so are prepared for the unexpected.
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Hi, true indeed that lessons learned in life made us who we are today. Failure, bad experiences, doubts, disappointments comes in our life but learning to deal with them through listing the positive and negative aspects would help us a lot. Thanks for sharing a very motivating post.
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I was particularly touched by #5. In fact, I remember there were times where I *thought* my future was safe and predictable. Working for a solid company, with a good salary and a probable promotion in sight. But some unanticipated events turned everything upside down. So I learned that even when you feel safe and comfortable (or perhaps, specially in that case) you shouldn’t think that bliss will last forever. There is no other way than embracing uncertainity in life, and making the most of it.
Yes, we do feel motivated by reading quotes and watching movies like The Pursuit of Happiness and Soul Surfer. The protagonist makes you feel you are the hero as psychology would call this Experience-taking. However, sometimes these things are not enough to drive you to accomplish your goals and dreams.
Our mind and body wants peace, yet a lack of inspiration shouldn’t slow us down. We wait to be inspired and get no work done because of it.
Is inspiration important to make us successful in our lives? Yes, because it acts as a trigger for the shotgun as it initiates the very vital ‘Beginning Process’ of which we are frightened to jump upon.
What exactly should you do when you lack the inspiration? Read the 5 points below:
1. Meditation Matters
You don’t need to do deep meditation wherein you train your mind to attain the desired state of consciousness. Meditation involves analyzing all kinds of emotions like anger, hatred, compassion, and love. According to many psychological studies, it is revealed meditation drastically minimizes anxiety and stabilizes cognitive ability.
It not only allows you to become inspired but keeps your body physically fit. Today, people are suffering from mental illness like depression. Even when someone is stressed, it is hard to get inspired. If you are a beginner in meditation, you can still experience results. It eradicates all the hindrances that come in the way by calming us down. It is no revelation you perform better when you are relaxed and mindful.
If you are new to meditation check out the iOS app Calm and Android app Headspace. Using proven meditation and mindfulness techniques, these mobile applications train your mind for a healthier, and happier life.
“Quiet the mind, and the soul will speak.” – Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati
2. Pausing Social Media
From your smartphone to your computer, shut everything off and give yourself a needed and short break. Remember, there were no mobile devices 100 years ago so people had to find different ways of entertainment. Perhaps, talk to an old friend or ask the cute girl out in your class.
The psychology today surveyed 100 individuals of which 50 were given all the digital facilities and 50 were provided only the required devices. After the experiment, it was proved that the later group did 85% more effective work than the former. Digital Media is becoming crowded and constrained, so do not forget to stop and pause from time to time.
3. Take a Chill-pill
In our current culture, people seem to be rushing and hustling to get things done, andthey don’t take the time to give their body and brain much-needed rest. According to Phyllis Korkki, a writer for the NY Times, “Employees generally need to detach from their workspace to recharge their internal resources that provide cognitive recharging.”
According to Beth W. Orenstein of Everyday Fitness, “It is easy to get frustrated when we feel uninspired. When these moments come, it is often a good idea to take a break for a few days. Sometimes your mind just needs a break from all the noise and hustle.” We must realize if we don’t rest, our bodies and minds will have no time to recharge, and our inspiration levels will lower down.
“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.” – Jim Goodwin
4. Miracles of Music
This is a head and heart combo, because scientifically, when you listen to your favorite music the soothing effect connects your brain and conscience emphatically. Maybe all you need is a soft jazz (it’s okay if your genre is a heavy metal) to get you out of your creative funk. Music does have a large influence on your emotions. Maybe you’re having a bad day and it is affecting your working ability. Listening to your favorite song might lift your mood and thus allow you to be more productive, innovative and creative in what you will do.
5. Shout out loud
Scientists bring this factor out frequently because people today don’t share their stuff. Their mind becomes a locker room where junk is stored, yet this garbage has to be removed. This negativity can and strain can be abolished when you shout loudly (at a place far which is calm and quiet).
Next time you feel uninspired, try attempting any of the above and you will be surprised how effective it works, because as psychologists say, “Human Beings came with a manual. All you need to know is how to read it.”
What are some ways you find inspiration? Let us know by commenting below!
Image courtesy of Twenty20.com
We all start somewhere. We may not know what our dream is to begin with.
This was certainly the case for me back in 2011. I’d hit rock bottom and everything in my life had gone wrong. There was no meaning in anything I was doing and I didn’t know why I existed. I had no dream and zero goals other than to survive the day.
My anxiety and stress levels were so high at that point in my life that just getting to go to bed at night was good enough.
So how do we begin anything?
I believe the way we begin is often by accident. We don’t always know when an idea is going to hit us or our life is going to change. For me, I certainly had no clue. My life up until that fateful day was spent chasing money and things that I thought mattered.
These were not things that mattered to me; they were things that mattered to society. Getting to where I was on that day was a complete accident. I always thought I was going to be this big time businessman importing stuff from China.
I thought that because I was born in the lucky country of Australia that I was entitled to success. This fateful day would soon teach me how wrong I was.
“Being wrong is often where it starts. Being wrong is where the accident of your success journey can begin”
There is one common trigger
That trigger is a low point where you decide that enough is enough. It often all begins when your pain levels reach and extreme point. It feels like your life is going to implode and that if you died tomorrow, it wouldn’t even matter.
My low point in 2011 became the defining moment where everything changed. I was not purposeful about my new path, but I had definitely had enough. Many of us get this same trigger. What I’ve found is that too many of us don’t use it. These low points are a gift and when you come face to face with one, you need to make the most of it.
These low points are the motivation and change in mindset that you need. I took my sign that my life needed to change and became obsessed.
What does the start of the journey look like?
It doesn’t look all that flash to begin with. The start of a journey towards success never does look amazing.
Mine was so simple it almost seems make-believe. I want to describe it for you in extreme detail so you can see just how simple it was.
On that fateful day where everything collapsed, I made a very small decision. It’s probably the smallest change in my life I have ever made. This decision changed everything.
“All I did was decide to walk around the neighborhood block, where I lived, once per day”
The duration was so short that it was impossible not to do. At this stage in my life, I was not conscious of anything and knew nothing about success or psychology.
I did this walk for a few days and then my mind told me that I wasn’t maximising the time. See, I am one of those crazy people who always has to be hyper productive. In this case, my hyper-productive mind was the greatest gift I had been given.
The next part is still a bit blurry. Having had no clue what to do other than doing my daily walk, I did what all millennials do: I asked Google for answers. I’m not sure what the series of search terms was that led me to Tony Robbins, nor do I care.
Once I found a Tony Robbins video on Youtube, I became hooked. All the answers I was seeking became instantly available to me. At this point, I turned into a total freak.
I got my iPod, downloaded a whole bunch of Tony Robbins audiotapes, and went for a walk every single day. Many of these walks became longer than one hour. I walked as fast as I could and I had a look of determination on my face that made me look like I had been possessed by the devil.
So the turning point was really these walks, combined with listening to audiotapes.
What does all of this mean for you?
That’s a damn good question cowboy. What it means for you is that you may be over thinking your next move. Your next move needs to be a decision. I recommend making lots of small decisions and trying many new things.
The thing that will take you on the next journey that could lead to your life’s purpose and / or dream is probably way simpler than you think. As humans, we over think success and we look for gianormous triggers or external factors before we’re willing to make a decision.
I believe it’s the small decisions that help you begin. It’s the little things you’re dismissing like taking a walk around the neighborhood block that could potentially change your circumstances.
Finding that trigger or habit is not enough
Even if you discover something like walking, which has a major effect on you, it’s not enough. You still need to get off your ass and make a decision. What is that decision you ask?
That decision is to no longer to accept your current results. It’s a decision to cut off from everything else and become intensely focused on one pursuit. If all you do is find a new habit that keeps you in the same rut you’ve been in, you’ll never start your own journey.
I used to be so lazy, indecisive and lack discipline. These were the traits that were holding me back. On many of these walks I went on, I decided that I’d no longer settle for these loser behaviors.
See yourself for what you can become, not who you currently are
“When you begin a new road towards success, you have to think of yourself differently. You absolutely must see yourself as who you can become and not who you currently are”
During my transformation, I focused on all the potential that I had and what I would look like in the future. I thought about standing on stages in front of thousands of people and doing something that filled me with joy and passion. I saw videos of thought leaders like Eric Thomas and told myself that I could live my life at the same level.
To this day, those thoughts have never left me and I never will let them go. Until you’ve been all the way to the lowest of lows, you’ll never know what it’s like to dream big.
You have so much more within you. Yes, people will laugh at you and think you’re dumb. The only reason they think like that is because they are pissed off at their own failures and misfortunes.
Going to Mars
Let me give you an example of people not believing. I’m coaching this young kid right now and he had the idea to take his product to Mars. When he told me that, he thought I’d laugh like everyone else. What he didn’t expect was for me to encourage him.
I told him that if he truly believed that his product could be on Mars, that he should shout it from the rooftop. I told him that he should look people in the eye and tell them he was going to Mars with his product!
If he focuses on who he is right now – a young kid with no money, no work experience and no product – he would never get started.
If he believed all the critics who have never achieved any such goal as going to Mars, he’d never begin.
The way to begin is not just to make a decision, but be bold and believe in yourself. You must believe before anyone will believe in what you’re starting.
If that means you are going to take your product to Mars then so be it.
***Final words***
Don’t let any outside force stop you from beginning any longer. You’ve wasted enough time as it is and life is too short to waste any more time. Go out there and begin. The start is always the hardest part, but it’s also the most rewarding.
Remember what I said before: the beginning will be made up of a few very small decisions and actions. Don’t look for that massive defining moment because chances are it will never come.
Get started right now and believe you were born to do something incredible. We’re all capable of greatness once we find a way to begin. Beginning the journey is where it all starts. No one knows what the end will look like and that’s half the fun.
Time to take the first step.
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Today was one of the best days of my life.
The last month, in fact, has been a dream. I’ve had to pinch myself to make sure I am not fantasizing about what I am experiencing.
The last year has been full of very hard work, lots of tears, a rollercoaster of emotions, forgiveness and gratitude.
I’ve recently got the career opportunities I’ve wanted, I’ve been able to get better at public speaking, my writing has been read more than ever and I have some amazing new friends. I’m not saying this to brag because that is definitely not me; I’m saying it to inspire you to have your own best day.
To have the best day of your life, you must setup your life the way you want it.
Decide on what you want
This fantastic day didn’t happen to me by accident. I earned every minute of it through my efforts. Those emotions I spoke about are what gave me the energy to power towards this phenomenal day.
I decided what I wanted. I painted a rough picture and focused on how I wanted to feel more than anything. Trying to be too exact can often put this goal of an ideal day too far into the future that you never get to touch it with your two beautiful hands.
“You’ll know when you have made the right set of decisions because each day will get closer to being your best day”
You’ll feel a shift in your psychology, your emotions and the presence you give to other people. You’ll start noticing that people compliment you a lot on the positivity you make them feel.
Positivity is infectious and it’s how you get the courage to make the right decisions that will give you the end result which is your best day.
The best day is often the simplest
You don’t need to fly to the moon and back to experience the best day of your life. What’s crazy is that your best day is simplistic. Your best day is unique to you and no two best days are alike.
My best day was dumb as hell. I spent time with a magnificent person, ate healthy food, enjoyed the sunshine and realized that I’ve become a champion in my own eyes (in my humble opinion).
Breaking the groove is the key
Days will flow into years without you realizing unless you stop your mind in its tracks.
Breaking the groove of your boredom and habits that don’t serve you, will allow you to get closer to your best day. During your best day, you’re present and fully aware of everything that’s going on.
Your best day is not about being productive; it’s about living in the moment and being happy and grateful for everything your best day has brought you.
“Until you get out of your messed up routine that has put you into a landslide of nothingness, you’ll continually miss every opportunity to have your best day and then repeat it for the future”
Routine is not all it’s cracked up to be. Routine has got you to where you are. It may be time to break it into little, tiny pieces.
Every day can be extraordinary
I’m not at this level yet but I know people who are. What if the circumstances of your day didn’t get in the way of it being mind-blowing? What if all you had to do was develop enough of a positive mindset to see mostly good things happening?
Being inspired, like how I’ve just described, is possible. Anything is possible when you believe it is. Each day can be your best day once you get on a roll. Before you can do that, you need to know what your best day feels like. Once you get a taste of it, you should have the drug that will get you addicted.
The people who I’ve seen have the best day, every day, have four main traits:
– They practice nonreactivity
– They find happiness in the littlest things
– They write down three things they’re grateful for every 24 hours
– Their default facial expression is a smile
Try and outdo yourself
Okay, so I have had one of my best days. Do I stop here and say “Yay I won?” Hell no brothers and sisters. The goal is to make your life into something that feels like that best day, every day. Writing down your best day is crucial because you’ll be surprised how easily you forget the contents and feelings of that day.
When you reminisce on that day, try only to do one thing: remember how you felt. For me, today, I felt confident, relaxed, inspired, happy and loved all at once. It’s the best feeling in the world and almost impossible to describe fully in words.
The whole challenge of describing my best day is how I know that I’ve hit a peak in my life.
At the top of the mountain, you feel like nothing can take you down. From this position, you feel like you can help so many people to live an inspired life.
Emotion starts to drive you and you concentrate on the way you make people feel rather than trying to be cool or sound smart / funny. The world, after your best day, will never be the same again.
You’ll have a permanent high to reflect on.
You’ll know what it’s like to have truly lived.
What’s important will finally become clear to you.
You’ll have ridiculous clarity on where you are going to spend your time.
It’s your turn
You’ve heard about my best day, now I want you to have yours. I want you to hit a new record in the story of your life. Having the best day of your life is possible for all of us. It’s not a far away land that we can never reach. It’s not a land that can only be reached on a golden chariot.
Today I’ve had my best day. Today I want you to have your best day. Your best day is where you show everybody the best of you. It’s where you show us all what you’ve been up to behind closed doors.
Your best day is where you get to celebrate, knowing that you’ve become someone you can be proud of. It’s your turn to have the best day of your life.
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For this entire year, I have been asked why I have zero goals.
That’s right. You heard right. I write all about personal development and how to be a better version of you and yet I have no goals for this year. You must think I’m a total screw up and a liar / cheat. You must think that I am completely incongruent.
How can you be successful if you have zero goals?
Okay, I left out one important detail. I decided this year to have only one mission and zero goals. Having a single mission means I can be completely focused, rather than get caught up in a blaze of half done goals. See the thing is I would rather achieve one massive, ginormous mission that means the world to me.
I am not interested in doing anything else other than playing life all out and you shouldn’t be either. There’s no point in being mediocre. Mediocre leads to an unfulfilling life and I can’t settle for that. In fact, I can’t settle for second best and you shouldn’t do that either.
Second best leads to regret and that feels like total crap to me. I don’t want to feel like that. The only way I can live the life I want to lead is to be nothing short of inspirational. This means I have to make all of you reading actually take action and execute like you never have before.
“This requires me to go first. This is because leaders go first and they eat their dinner last”
A brief interlude…Tracy Morgan
I’ve just finished listening to a podcast about the famous comedian Tracy Morgan. I’ve never taken him very seriously until the man made me cry like a baby this morning. The man was in a bad car accident and nearly died. He came out the other side having realized what his goal is.
His goal is to love people and show us how to do the same through his comedy. That’s his entire goal. He doesn’t write goal lists or live some crazy morning ritual. His ritual is a single mission and a single goal.
There is something about having a single mission that is so damn motivational in itself. It’s simple and easy to execute on just one thing. We all do such a poor job at trying to juggle multiple balls.
“What if all you needed to do was juggle one ball at a time while taking part in life’s circus”
Through the tears I shed by listening to Tracy be the opposite of funny for a brief moment, I finally understood that our life purpose is our single mission. Our life purpose is that one big mission that we should focus all of our attention on.
As we go through life, our mission can change but our purpose does not. Whatever your mission is and whatever way you find to serve people, you’ll eventually realize that you must love people and show them how to do the same.
Now to be vulnerable
The mission I wanted to achieve this year was to find an amazing woman. I’ve turned down every other offer and every business proposal to do just that. Everyone who knows me knows this mission. It’s written everywhere. It’s spoken about more than one hundred times per day.
If I liked tattoos, I’d probably get it stamped on my arm so I don’t forget it. It’s not easy to admit to the world that I’m trying to find a woman. Generally, people keep this sort of thing behind closed doors and rarely speak about it. It’s a secret mission that shows me that we’re all the same.
So I thought screw it. I’m either going to live what I preach and be honest, otherwise what’s the point?
Why bother writing these words if I’m going to hide behind some corporate mask trying to be someone I’m not. There’s something so freeing about sharing your single mission for the year.
Focus is king
By having one mission for this year, it’s made life crystal clear. When I thought about taking a holiday, I said no. When an opportunity to join a business venture came up, I said no. When I was asked to speak about what I do, I said no.
It’s hard to say no. I’ve found that it’s easier to say no when you have a single mission. You don’t feel regret because you have focused all of your energy on just one thing. I feel that simplicity is so freeing and that’s one of the reasons why I live a minimalistic life.
I want to save my mind for my life’s purpose and not waste thinking capacity on having 101 goals that are not that important to me. This advice might seem counter intuitive to every other self-help blog post, book, video you’ve ever seen. So what? Think about it carefully and it will make sense.
Big goals take enormous energy
Imagine the rejection, negativity, hard work and vulnerability it takes to find a woman for a second. I can tell you that it takes everything you’ve got. If you don’t give it all, then you don’t get the result. This year I knew that I wouldn’t have the energy to achieve my one big mission unless I deleted everything else.
You piss a lot of people off when you do this, but they eventually forgive you. The ones who don’t weren’t your true supporters anyway. The reason I have the energy to deal with so many negative emotions is that I’ve stored up massive reserves, by having no other goals.
The most fatiguing part of having one big mission rather than lots of goals is the decision making that comes with it. Making decisions drains your energy so by not having lots of goals I can concentrate my decision making muscle on only things that are relevant to my mission.
Through the process, I’ve simplified other parts of my life to compound my energy reserves further. I try to have a basic wardrobe, eat similar meals most days, have very few emails, have one place to post my blog articles and so on.
The truth that will set you free
Here it is: you’re distracted, over worked and not focused on what matters to you.
That’s a very harsh thing to say but it’s true. Riding along the highway with just one goal for a year allows you to reset. You may not live this way forever although I think it’s good to try it out on a major goal that seems to escape you continually.
Being true to yourself and forgiving yourself for your past failures will allow you to start fresh. This time, start fresh on a single goal that is a must for you.
When a goal becomes a must, and you’ve diverted all your energy towards it, you’ll see the results you’ve always longed for.
“Take that single mission and slap it over the head until you get the monkey off your back that is distraction and complication”
Narrow down, chunk it down and show us all how to love people. Don’t stop until you get what you want. When you get it, remember to be grateful.
Wish me luck with my mission. Peace. Big, scary world I’m coming for you!
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
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Jay
Jan 1, 2017 at 10:45 am
Excellent article. I loved phrases like Certainty is an illusion. Worst-case scenario action steps. This piece of advice will be very useful to every entrepreneur.
LOURDES CAIBE
Mar 17, 2016 at 11:51 am
Cloris, your articles are excellent .You are very smart. I enjoy your comments about Donald Trump are great. Being a successful person, like you has an important message: Never stop
Congratulation
Pamina Mullins
Mar 17, 2016 at 8:23 am
Very sound advice Cloris! As both you and Bertie’s comment point out – much of the pain of “failure” is due to the shock of unanticipated developments. With a plan like you’ve described here, you’ve considered the best and worst case scenarios and the implications, so are prepared for the unexpected.
leadership skills
Mar 17, 2016 at 1:56 am
Hi, true indeed that lessons learned in life made us who we are today. Failure, bad experiences, doubts, disappointments comes in our life but learning to deal with them through listing the positive and negative aspects would help us a lot. Thanks for sharing a very motivating post.
Bertie
Mar 16, 2016 at 3:45 pm
I was particularly touched by #5. In fact, I remember there were times where I *thought* my future was safe and predictable. Working for a solid company, with a good salary and a probable promotion in sight. But some unanticipated events turned everything upside down. So I learned that even when you feel safe and comfortable (or perhaps, specially in that case) you shouldn’t think that bliss will last forever. There is no other way than embracing uncertainity in life, and making the most of it.