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What Successful Life Leaders Do to Build a Deeply Fulfilling Life

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Picture this: Two dudes, each on a horse, in a huge field. At the same time, each horse starts moving. That’s where the similarities end. 

Dude #1 is holding on for dear life. He looks terrified and is bouncing around like he’s on a pogo stick instead of a horse. Basically, he happens to be there while the horse is doing whatever it darn well pleases. It prances, bucks, gallops, walks, spins around, runs in wide arcs. Through it all, the feller is off-balance, barely breathing, occasionally uttering a yell or expletive, and hoping for it all to calm down so he can catch his breath before the next rampage.

Dude #2, however, is a whole different story. His horse is moving under its own significant power, of course, but our guy is guiding it, encouraging it first one way, then another. He’s slowing it down when it wants to bolt ahead, and communicating firmly what he wants. Through it all, he sits tall in the saddle, holds the reins in a way that allows him the clearest communication with his ride. 

Got the metaphor?  

Your life is like the horses. It moves of its own volition, under its own steam. There are external factors and lots of unknowns that create circumstances beyond your total control. But the way you show up to your experience of life will make all the difference in your “ride.” You can feel like a victim of life’s twists, turns, and bucks, or you can learn how to ride and respond. Doesn’t mean you (I, we) won’t occasionally fall off or lose control, but it does ensure your ride will be a much, much more fulfilling experience.

Following are some of the most fundamental mindsets and practices successful life leaders put into place as they take the reins, improve their skills, and learn how to ride this thing called life! 

1. Know They are ALWAYS at Choice

What’s that? You’re a human being in the world? Welcome to the club! Membership means you will, for sure, be judged, impacted by circumstances, and swept off your feet with awe. You’ll be loved, dumped, and loved again. You’ll have to hear (and say), “No.” You’ll hear (and say), “YES!” You’ll suffer disappointment, staggering grief, and moments of complete clarity…possibly followed by totally engulfing confusion. The world will surprise, delight, and throw you. And through it all, you are at choice.

2. Take RESPONSIBILITY for their Lives

It follows from the above that if we are fully at choice in our lives, we then hang out and take responsibility for what our choices create. The alternative? Being at choice (yay!), not liking or feeling good about the outcome (boo!), and sliding into “victim” mode, pointing the finger of blame at someone or something (mega BOO). The biggest problem with that (aside from the guarantee it’s going to create some seriously negative juju in relationships and the ethers of the world, and the world has plenty, right?!) is in how completely disempowering it is.

When we shirk responsibility for what we’re creating through our choices, it’s like we’re standing tall and then with one exceedingly long and muscular arm, we pull the rug out from under ourselves, then yell at someone else (or the breeze) about it. 

“The secret to a fulfilled life is not only to do well but also to do good.” – Tony Robbins

3. Believe Their INNER FOUNDATION is Everything, and Act Like It

If you’ve got no roots, your tree’s gonna fall when the first wind blows. What grows deep, strong, far-reaching roots? Daily doses of sunlight, nutrients, water. And yeah, yeah…I know that you can see by the rings that trees go through stressed, lean years and healthy, full years, and they survive. But if trees had a choice (ahem, see #1 above), you can bet they’d keep up a steady dose of what’s going to help them thrive continuously. 

The most sustainably successful life leaders I know are people who fully and consistently exercise their power of choice when it comes to creating a strong, deep foundation of self-care they can rely on…and in so doing, they learn they can rely on themselves. The thing is, this one isn’t rocket science. By now, *we know* the value of even short bits of meditation, prayer, or whatever stillness practice jives with each individual. We know that tending our most important relationships can make, well, just about every single thing better.

4. Get a Handle on Their FEAR

Fear gets a bad rap. Seems like everywhere we turn, we’re being called to “be fearless!” and kick our fear to the curb. Thing is, fear is one of THE core emotions we’re hardwired for, and we need it. Though we might not be running from actual tigers, our fear plays an incredibly key role in keeping us from entering unsafe situations and in helping us know when it’s time to vamoose when a situation becomes unsafe, emotionally or physically. 

Enter life leadership, where we practice and practice and practice creating a conscious relationship with our fear, managing it down to size, seating our most empowered selves behind the wheel of our lives, and gleaning the wisdom this primal part of us has to offer…while moving forward. 

5. Know That IF NOTHING CHANGES, NOTHING CHANGES

Does all this make sense in yer noggin, yah? And…when it comes down to it, ya gotta do the work.Life leaders zero in on what’s most important, they figure out why it’s worth it, and they take responsibility (cough-cough…#2 above) for getting the support and accountability they need to start making shifts in a more empowered.

HERE’S PERHAPS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF ALL OF THIS: If what you just read *doesn’t* describe you, but you *want* it to, take heart! Any of us out here doing this life leadership work started right where you are. We’re no different, we’re not special (though, c’mon, we’re all pretty damn fabulous in our own ways), and it’s totally doable. You’ve got this, and you’re so worth it!

Fletcher Kennith is a professional in the Cyber Security sphere. He has more than two years of experience as a cybersecurity engineer in VeePN VPN company. Fletcher Kennith knows exactly how to unblock any web site and protect data privacy. Also, he has succeeded in the areas of Data entry, business development, and project management.

Life

Here’s Why Productivity Hacks Don’t Work

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How many times have you eagerly tried out a new productivity hack or tool and not gotten the result you expected? There is wealth of information available to us giving us everything we need to know to increase our productivity, but most people live their life in chaos.  Why do still see so many people struggling to manage their time and simply not able to get the results they desire?  What is missing? (more…)

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Life

4 Lies You Keep Telling Yourself When You’re Afraid to Do Something

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lies you tell yourself
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When’s the last time you let fear get the better of you? Whether we want to admit it or not, fear keeps us from doing a lot of the things we know we really should do to achieve our goals. Fear is especially detrimental to entrepreneurs (read ‘wantrepreneurs’) that want to launch their first big project. (more…)

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Tips, Tools, and Techniques to Create Your Curiosity

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Curiosity is a great characteristic that people rarely sustain in their lifetimes. Some people struggle to sustain curiosity because of their internal and external challenges. They cannot encourage curiosity to come to the fore as they condition their mindsets with their learning, experience, and environment. However, there are very few individuals who sustain their curiosity levels throughout their lives to excel as extraordinary achievers.  (more…)

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Life

5 Life Tips You Didn’t Know You Needed to Hear

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Life is a battleground, we need to keep fighting until our appointed time on earth comes. So, in this post, you will see the best of the best life tips you have never heard before. These tips are life-changing and can change you immediately. Let’s go!

1. Be independent 

Hundreds of millions of people make this mistake. We depend on people like us. “he will get it done for me, she will get it done for me”. You rely heavily on people and guess what, you are making a big mistake. 

There are a lot of people that have helped others and perhaps time changes for them, they become poor and rely on the people they have helped, guess what comes out at the end of this reliance? Disappointment, promises backed by failures, etc. 

Who are you depending on? Who is that person you can’t do without when getting things in your life done? If there is anyone, you are making a big mistake. And starting today, all you have to do is add a prefix – what if!

What if my friend stops helping me, what if I get disappointed by people I trust with my life, what if they neglect me and turn me down”.

A man or woman that depends on people like him is equal to a feeble pillar holding the four corners of a house. What happens when the feeble pillar falls? The man’s house falls down super-flat. Your trust should only be in Jesus. Man can fail us at any time but God is always faithful till his Kingdom comes. 

2. Love your neighbor as yourself 

The gravity of this word is enough to shatter the whole earth into pieces. 

Only if the whole world just kept this simple commandment Christ Jesus gave then, there will be no murders, poverty, greediness, anger, envy, betrayal, disappointment, etc. 

Why are there such things in the world? Because we hate ourselves. As long as you are fine all is well. You care about yourself only, selfish, you have and yet you cannot give. 

Those are the characteristics of over 90% of the 7.6 billion humans on earth. Why can’t you do to others what you would have them do to you? Why can’t you help that suffering neighbor who needs food? Then, a lot of people will say 

“Go away from here beggar, what did you do with your youth, I can’t give you a dime, beggar”. Why are we so cruel? This is the best tip you must dear to your heart. 

No matter what you have, no matter how little or in whatever way you can help. Help people, show them love, love them as you love yourself. Don’t forget this, today’s beggar, uneducated, debtor, poor person, etc can later become the greatest person in the world tomorrow. 

“Don’t settle for what life gives you; make life better and build something.” — Ashton Kutcher

3. Have a growth mindset

A growth mindset is what makes one successful and go far in life. However, a fixed and stagnated mindset throws one into jeopardy of life.

A lot of people have a fixed mindset, what they believe is what they believe, nothing you say on earth can change their mindset, they are the most educated in the world so they don’t need to learn any further. Did you have a fixed or growth mindset?

A growth mindset leads to success, achievements, happiness, learning more, and becoming better. On the other hand, a fixed mindset leads to complacency, pride, lack of achievement, ignorance, the stagnancy of the mind, etc. 

Let’s see an example of someone with a fixed mindset:

Cait tells Alice: Alice stop being so proud it’s annoying. 

And Alice responds:

“How dare you say I am proud, I am not. I am the most humble woman on earth”. In the example, Alice with a fixed mindset has a fixed mindset. However, what she does not know is that she is in the darkness of her ignorance. She is ignorant of the fact that she is a proud person thus, she can’t see it. 

People with a fixed mindset are ignorant. You must never have a fixed mindset. Always be willing to learn and to grow with humility. Pride can take you nowhere. 

4. Forgive everyone and give as many second chances as you can  

A lot of people have done all they could to be happy and have peace. But, they find out that happiness is not just there and that peace of mind is absent. 

Why is that? It is because you have a lot of grudge against people that have offended you. Yes, we know, it pained you to your heart, and what next? Keep malice? But, do you know what that unforgiveness does to you?

I call it the seed of unforgiveness because it plants a seed in your heart and this seed further grows to become hatred, depression, lack of freedom, zero peace, etc. 

If in only one person’s heart are all these things, then a person like that can never know peace and happiness. For example, if you were to go to a party with your friends and you hear that perhaps the other friend that you keep malice with is coming to the same party. 

Naturally, the only thing you would think of is not going to the party anymore because you want to avoid the person at all costs. And what does that add to you? It doesn’t add instead, it subtracts from your life because you could have gone to the party, had fun, and even have new friends or even new opportunities.

If not for anything will you forgive people, forgive them for the sake of God, for the sake of Christ Jesus. Because if you cannot forget the trespass of people, don’t expect God to forgive you. Forgive everyone, give them as many second chances as possible. 

Mind you, they can still mess up and make terrible mistakes all you have to do is keep forgiving them. This may not be so easy to the flesh. However, it is only The Spirit of God that can make you forgive the trespass of people. Without The Holy Spirit, it is impossible to do so. 

5. Love God

Do you love God? Are you a child of God? Do you believe in Christ Jesus? Even if the rest of the tips on these lists do not resonate with you, I want you to hold this very important to your heart which is to Love God with all your heart, soul, and strength.

And you can do that only by being a child of God. This life is too short. It is like a vapor, it is nothing. Life is more like an empty barrel that makes noise. You will grow old, your strength will leave you and you will die but, what happens after that? Where are you going to spend the rest of your eternity? 

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