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How to Crush Fear, Beat Imposter Syndrome, and Create a Fulfilled Life

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If you spent time studying greatness and the leaders who went before us and created success, you’d see a group of individuals that came to understand the power of a strong mindset.  The word “mindset” is described as “a mental attitude or inclination” by Merriam-Webster. It’s one of the leading indicators of creating success, accomplishing goals, and living a fulfilled life.

If you can’t visualize your goals, you’ll have a difficult time taking action. If your mindset is not one of “this is already done, I just need to put in the work to get there.” If you don’t have that mindset, you’ll always wait for the other shoe to drop every time you experience success in life.

Having a relentless mindset is more than a meme on Facebook or a cute Instagram quote picture. It’s a religion. It’s a way of life that leads to healthy habits you implement every day as you take action despite unexpected circumstances and moments when giving up feels easier.

Everywhere you look, there’s no shortage of people that are searching for ways to live a happier life, have better relationships, lose weight, create more financial freedom, and improve their lives. What’s missing is understanding the importance of their mindset and doing to work to become stronger mentally. A relentless mindset is one of the key ingredients in creating sustainable change. 

Today’s access to information gives us a vivid picture of how your mindset can help you accomplish goals while putting in the work to help you become the best versions of yourself. Create these relentless success-focused mindsets to beat fear and live out success. 

“No matter what, people grow. If you chose not to grow, you’re staying in a small box with a small mindset. People who win go outside of that box. It’s very simple when you look at it.” – Kevin Hart

Invest resources into knowing yourself better than you know anything

The journey to success starts with self-awareness. Learning and knowing yourself is a crucial ingredient for creating personal growth. If you don’t understand what makes you move or not move, you won’t know whether to push, rest, or move on. You listen to your limiting beliefs when you can’t distinguish the difference. You end up thinking they’re the truth because you don’t know enough about yourself to understand this is the time to be real with yourself. 

Without finely tuned self-awareness, you won’t know what success path to follow that leads to accomplishing your goals. A lack of self-awareness means you won’t see the tripwires to avoid and what would help you overcome unexpected challenges. Take as much time as it takes to learn more about yourself and develop a better appreciation of what makes you unique. Invest resources into mental health professionals, hire coaches, watch videos, read books, listen to podcasts, read articles, and become a Ph.D. level in knowing who you are. 

You are your most extraordinary life project to accomplish. Take your self-awareness journey seriously and learn more about yourself every day.

Make consistency in taking action your only choice

Creating relentless mindsets takes consistent action and a daily commitment to healthy habits in every area of your life. However, consistency has to be long term and relentlessly pursued. Success can’t be something you do while it feels good — it has to be a lifestyle. 

If you want to beat fear and imposter syndrome, being consistent should be the only option you’ll give yourself even if life gets hard. You decide to wake up and commit to physical movement. You make the understanding of energy-based healthy nutrition choices a priority. You have a plan for your days, weeks, and months based on accomplishing your goals in a specific amount of time. You stay away from energy-drainers that you know will sabotage your journey to consistency. 

You relentlessly take actions day in, day out, and make it your mindset and lifestyle instead of viewing it as things you’re trying to change in your life. You become and stay relentless in the commitment to excellence. 

Love yourself and mean it

You may think you understand self-care, but consuming content on the topic and implementing self-love principles are two different mindsets. Taking care of yourself gives you the mental bandwidth and energy to create a relentless success-hungry routine. Treat your relationship with yourself as the most valuable relationship in your life. 

The pursuit of creating success should be you taking care of yourself first and foremost and giving yourself what you need to feel good. Success happens when you show up powerful through consistent self-care routines that take care of your mind, body, and spirit. You can’t always be on. 

Never stop doing what makes you feel good about yourself, your goals, and what you can accomplish. Creating a relentless mindset comes from a place of putting yourself first and then thinking about helping others. 

“I think anything is possible if you have the mindset and the will and desire to do it and put the time in.” – Roger Clemens

Become a 1% success-seeker

Creating success means you level up in every area of your life in more than words. You don’t spend time posting on social media about what you’re going to do — you make big moves and let your action do the talking. You shift what you’ll accept. 

A success-based mindset means you set the boundaries with everyone and don’t let people or situations cross those boundaries. You keep a circle of high-level, achieving leaders that crave growth. You have regular self-performance reviews. You create healthy habits to make sure you’re on track. You have accountability. 

1% success happens when you work in silence and let your results tell the world where you’re going in life. The success you seek is born in the mindset you’re building every day with each decision. Make your journey to success the most remarkable project and focus in your life. Be relentless in becoming your best you.

Jason Portnoy is a serial entrepreneur, podcast host, and founder of one of the premier digital marketing agencies. Before creating magic for other brands, Jason launched True Rivalry in 2012. He leveraged social media and digital marketing to grow True Rivalry into a presence in over 250 retail stores across North America, with celebrity fans and appearances on TV shows and movies. Jason knows digital marketing and he's passionate about helping businesses get results. He's an award-winning digital marketing agency owner. Join him at jportnoy.com.

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Life

The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

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Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

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Life

How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.

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It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

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Life

Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

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People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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