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The 3 Biggest Fears Stopping Progress and Change

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Biggest fears

With the current state of our society, the violence, the hate being promoted and the unrest of the world and it’s relationships with one another, one could say that we should all be worried.  One could say that, but for some that wouldn’t be the case.  

You see businesses are being created virtually every minute, millions are being generated almost overnight by many, and the economy, while always volatile, is being reported very positively.  What I’m seeing here is that for some it’s not going to be FEAR that rules but activity; however, for most that simply isn’t the case.

Based on the current state of affairs that the majority of human beings face in the world today one could argue that many have either settled on their current situation or have given up on their hopes and dreams.  

When I see so many reactions and in some cases, overreactions, I see a much deeper answer than that of the one we get thrown from the nightly news, online headlines, and/or social media posts.

Check out the three main fears that I see as ruling the human condition and the actions or, lack there of, in so many people:

1. Fear Of Rejection

This is where people would rather “Go with the flow” to feel accepted than rather be an individual and risk doing that by themselves.  I call this the Friendship Chameleon syndrome.  So many people would rather fold their own sense of self to that of someone else and give full authority to someone else to speak for them and carry their persona because they simply don’t want to feel like they were rejected by that individual and or group.

“To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.” – Bertrand Russell

2. Fear of Loss

There is a very popular show that aired on A&E called “Hoarders”, where it chronicled the journey of people who held on to everything because they felt it helped them identify with their own self and/or it reminded them of happier times or people that have left them or their circle.  

We do the same thing today with our jobs, our incomes, our relationships, and/or our networks.  Instead of getting rid of the things that are no longer of value, bringing value, or solving our problems, we would rather pile them up, justify the “trash” and deal with it.  This is because what we are really fearing is losing what we’ve always known to be reality instead of taking on a new challenge meant solely for us as the individual.

3. Fear of Failure

The most common of the big three, the fear of failure has frozen even the smartest and strongest of individuals.  This is the cause of so many “stand still” or neutral feelings in our lives and businesses.  So many people continue to manage their lives and businesses because it’s safe rather than raise our level of activity and go for broke to scale and create more income for ourselves or businesses due to the sense of failure if we don’t reach our ultimate goals.

What everyone needs to understand is that we will get rejected, we will lose something, and we will fail.  It’s going to happen and recognizing it early will help but, more importantly, let’s revert back to that old saying of “we can only control those things we can control.” 

“If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles.” – Sun Tzu

We can control our Fear of Rejection by building deeper networks and pipelines. We can control the Fear of Loss by dumping the things we don’t need or don’t want from our lives and businesses RIGHT NOW. We can control the Fear of Failure by creating so much activity in our lives and businesses that we no longer have the time or energy to even notice or focus on those times we fail.  

The key to controlling ALL of these big 3 killers of progress of change is to simply go out and create opportunities, testimonials, and resumes of PROGRESS and CHANGE.

Which one of the three is your biggest fear and why? Please leave your thoughts below!

Matt Crane is a former NCAA & Professional athlete turned sales and marketing entrepreneur.  In 2014 Matt launched his company Matt Crane Enterprises and now helps companies grow their sales and marketing presence. Matt is a professional blogger and ghostwriter featured in publications such as Huffington Post, Influencive, and Prsuit.  He launched the Power Of Great Podcast in July of this year where he has interviewed successful entrepreneurs and business leaders such as Grant Cardone, Shawn Thomas, Jeffery Gitomer, and John Lee Dumas to name a few. Matt believes that your current situation is not your defining moment and that is why he is addicted to success.

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2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. okwudili ikenna

    Dec 21, 2016 at 8:16 am

    Nice post by the admin of this great blog.. i am really a fan of this blog and i love all i see here.
    going through the activities of this blog inspires me to work harder on my blog!

    • Matt Crane

      Dec 29, 2016 at 4:40 pm

      Okwudili thank you for taking the time to read this article and I look forward to continuing to provide you the content you are looking for to inspire and motivate you to do great things.

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Life

How to Write a Personal Destiny Statement in 3 Steps

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personal destiny statement
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We all have a God-given destiny to fulfill that we were each born with. I personally believe it is buried deep down within us. The number one secret to success is to let it emerge out of you and release it to the world. What is my destiny you may ask? It is the thing you would regret not doing before leaving Planet Earth. (more…)

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Don’t Want To Feel Like A Failure Anymore? Stop Doing These 6 Things

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It’s pretty annoying isn’t it? All those great and accomplished people telling you that FAILURE is a necessity on your way to success. Yeah, that’s easy for them to say; they’re already ‘on the other side’! You on the other hand, are still struggling all day everyday to get your business lifted off the ground and are really not that sure if you’re indeed going to make it.

There’s that little voice in your head that keeps telling you that you don’t have the stuff to make it all happen. Not now and not ever. You feel like a failure…it’s holding you back and you don’t know how to deal with it. Well you could do yourself a favor and start dealing with it by doing the following things:

1. Stop Denying You Feel Like A Failure

Telling yourself things are going great when they’re not is one of the biggest, though most useless, coping mechanisms human beings deploy in rough times. Common denial signals among entrepreneurs: trying to regain more control by working even more hours and on the other side compensating this by letting go of all this control by partying and drinking way too hard.

What you’re doing is denying yourself the opportunity to actually feel what’s going on and acknowledge the problem; that both you and your business are in a bad place. Without acknowledging it, it’ll be pretty difficult to actually STOP feeling it. And remember, just because you feel like a failure, this does not mean that you indeed ARE a failure!

2. Stop Making It Bigger Than it Really Is

This is one of those other ‘fun’ things human beings do; we blow things way out of proportion in our heads! In business, when you lose that big client you’ve been working on for weeks, it feels like it’s the end of the world. You start doubting yourself, your strategy, your entire business model right up to the point where you barely sleep because you’re working on pivoting the whole thing.

But what if that customer simply didn’t have the money to go for your service anyway? Or what if they just decided to go for someone who is cheaper but who offers less quality? Does that mean there’s something wrong with YOU? Or that this was the ONLY customer out there and that you’re now doomed forever?

Of course not, it simply means that THIS CUSTOMER wasn’t a match. It’s a bit like dating actually…So if you take this into consideration, could it be that you just feel like a failure instead of really not succeeding in that what you want to at this point in time?

3. Stop Thinking You’re The Only One Who Feels Like This

You’re not! With the possible exception of the true sociopaths, that feeling you’re feeling is very normal to EVERYONE. It might not seem like it on the outside – because people don’t like to acknowledge this remember – but I can guarantee you that it’s true. But unlike 99% of the world’s population, YOU’RE not going to let this feeling stop you in your tracks. Are you?

4. Stop Thinking You’re Supposed To Be Superhuman

In fact, it’s very likely that you’re already doing, learning and succeeding at WAY more than most other people are. But for entrepreneurs, somehow, that never seems to be enough. You don’t just want to be successful after a few years of hard work (which is normal). You want to be successful after only a few months. Because you’re special…or at least you think you are…

Well, here’s the truth: you ARE special! But…it’s just not very likely that you’re one of those – very very rare – entrepreneurial superstars that – seemingly – just added some hot water and got instant business success as a result.

5. Stop Being So Incredibly Stubborn

Entrepreneurs are stubborn…almost by default. It’s what makes them push forward in the hardest of times. But…if you’re not doing the right things right you might just be hammering a square peg through a round hole. Which will only add to that frustrated feeling you’re already having. So why not stop being so stubborn for a moment, stop hammering away on that what obviously is not working and ask for help?

No matter who you ask – a business mentor or coach, a befriended entrepreneur – someone with a neutral perspective on you and our business will be very likely to see what’s going on with a lot more clarity than you can and can guide you to a place that will feel a whole lot more comfortable.

6. Stop Being Afraid Of Failure

I know, I know, you’ve heard this a million times before and you wouldn’t be in this pickle if you could do this. Right? I’m right there with ya!

But, if you get really rational about it, what’s the worst that could happen?

  • You might have to get a ‘real’ job for a while and start over on the side;
  • You might not be able to afford your rent anymore…but with Airbnb on the 1 hand and couchsurfing on the other, you should be able to work it out somehow;
  • You’ll have all the more experience to start over a whole lot faster;
  • You’ll be no less respected by anyone because it’s clear you gave it your all;
  • In a few years, when you’re an established and supersuccessful entrepreneur you’ll also have a cool failure story to tell;
  • None of your limbs will fall off;

Now that’s not too bad for a plan B is it? Failure is such a negative word. And the associated feeling is terrible and numbing. But really…how is giving it your all and not succeeding really the same as failing? Shouldn’t the definition of failure not be along the lines of ‘not even trying’ or ‘giving up when it gets hard’?

In other words: stop beating yourself up over this!

There’s really no need to feel like a failure at all because you’re sticking your neck out, you’re trying to make a difference and you’re still moving upward on that treacherous entrepreneurial mountain.

And that…is what success REALLY is.

Those Who Failed Their Way To Success

Quotes To Live By:

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

“If you don’t try at anything, you can’t fail… it takes back bone to lead the life you want” – Richard Yates

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas A. Edison

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie

“Success is stumbling form failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm” – Winston Churchill

“Don’t let success go to your head and failure to your heart” – Will Smith

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Life

Why You Never Have Enough Time and What You Need to Do About It

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how to manage your time better
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Has this ever happened to you? You had an assignment, and the deadline was far away. You didn’t work on it much, but in the back of your mind, that insistent little voice was always whispering, “I gotta get this assignment done.” (more…)

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Life

6 Unusual Exercises to Effectively Increase Your Creativity Faster Than Ever

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how to increase your creativity faster
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Although a vast majority of people think that creativity is something you are born with, the truth is a bit different. While we cannot deny that you need natural talent to a certain extent, stimulating creative thinking is indeed a matter of practice. If you give this thought a bit of thinking, you can realize pretty quickly that even the most fascinating and creative minds have faced the lack of creativity at some point in their lives. (more…)

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