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Sharing is Caring: 6 Scientifically Proven Ways Helping Others Can Improve Your Life



how helping others improves your life
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I’ve come to believe that the simple formula for happiness and success in life lies in caring about others, helping them in any way we can, and sharing what we have. I learned this the hard way. In the beginning, when I was striving for career success, better relationships, improved overall health and mental well-being, I thought others had nothing to do with it, that it’s a battle I had to win on my own.

With this mindset, though, I made my life more complicated and didn’t improve personally, spiritually, or professionally any time soon. Then, I decided to give another approach a try. To make others part of my journey in small ways, but do it every day. I began talking to both strangers and people in my surroundings more, opening up, sharing my goals and giving them advice, or simply listening to their problems and showing compassion.

I stopped investing my time only in ‘me’ activities, and began doing ‘we’ activities. That could be seeing someone in need and spending time with them even if I didn’t feel like it, becoming more active in the local community, volunteering even. All that paid off tenfold because I received so much in return that my career, happiness level, relationships and peace of mind were all improving. After experiencing the wonderful benefits of helping others, I did my research and found out all these positive effects were actually science-backed.

So let me share how sharing and caring can improve our life and maybe inspire you to start doing more for others too:

1. Helping others is good for your health

I’ll begin with the health benefits of caring about others. Doing something altruistic leads to positive physiological changes, strengthens the immune system, and can even reduce pain, thanks to the release of endorphins in the brain.

I started volunteering many years ago and had the chance to experience those benefits first hand. Turns out, volunteers often live longer and have a better general health than those who never get involved in giving to others. I believe it’s the little things that matter. Being there for the person in need is one example. That is if you choose a cause that involves direct communication with the less fortunate, of course.

Nothing compares to seeing another human being open up and realizing no one ever listened to that person, not many cared, and that he might not know what compassion looks like. So when you give them exactly that by simply keeping them company, you can see the transformation in their eyes. As a result, that changes you too.

2. It helps us handle stress better

We all have stressors in our lives, whether we admit it or not. But little did I know that the solution to this too was hidden in volunteering. Once I began doing more for others and focusing less on my desires and needs, my mental health improved. I found meaning, I felt good about myself, and signs of depression, stress, and anxiety started disappearing. Researchers have proven that too and state that because of this, volunteering can increase our lifespan.

3. We form a deeper connection with ourselves thanks to sharing

Giving is a way to connect with others but it also helps us get to know ourselves better, forgive ourselves, and be more compassionate. Ultimately, that leads to feeling good about ourselves and forming a deeper connection that then helps us live a purpose-driven life.

We appreciate everything more when we volunteer. It changes our perspective. It’s proven to distract us from our own problems and thus help us deal with the hardships in life. I can’t count the many deep conversations I’ve had with people I wanted to help and that meant more for them than any food they were given that same day. It’s because they forgot what real connection looks like and once they experienced it, their souls were reborn.

But there were also many examples from my volunteering experience where we just sat there with the person and connected on a deeper level without saying a word. As you know, words aren’t always necessary. But energy can’t be wrong. That person in front of me felt I was there to give without expecting anything in return and simply accepted my good energy and sent back gratitude.

4. Doing good for others improves our social life

Along with a better relationship with ourselves, we who volunteer also have a better social life. It all begins by noticing a new form of social connection once we start helping those in need. That might lead to friendships that last long. But even if it’s just for the sake of making somebody smile after serving them a meal at a shelter, it’s all for a good cause and we socialize in the most genuine way possible. As multiple studies have suggested, we are social beings and the more interactions we have in life, the better the condition of our brain is

5. Increased happiness levels

Nothing has ever made me feel more thankful for what I already have than giving. Helping others somehow opens our eyes to how little other people might have and we feel like we live in abundance. Then, we begin cherishing all the people in our life, our own body and mind, and each of our precious days on this planet more. We use our time more effectively, do things we love, and socialize.

Every time you do a good deed for others, you get a feeling of euphoria (that’s the endorphins released in the brain) and you feel great. Such a mental boost is even addictive and we seek more of the same feeling once we get to experience it.

People in need can’t fake it and they also can’t hide their happiness. So you are sure they are truly thankful and pleasantly surprised when you go the extra mile. I saw this when I stayed with them longer than planned and they knew I just wanted to be there with them than anywhere else.

Other times I would bring them personalized gifts such as a picture of a place at the other corner of the world so they can dream of being there and have a vision for a better life. Or a book we’ve discussed if I see they like reading and losing themselves in stories.

6. Give more for better relationships

Last but not least, I noticed that giving is good for my relationships. That too is scientifically-proven. One reason is the spiritual growth we experience as a result of giving more. We find meaning and fill the void inside, we are now complete and braver. That boosts self-esteem.

Another great benefit of helping others which affects our already existing relationships in life is the gratitude we are filled with. That transforms into caring about anyone around us more, appreciating their company and making every minute with them count. My loved ones immediately noticed I treated them better, with respect, listened more, and complained less.

I hope these science-backed points will motivate you to find little ways to help others today. Our mission in life is not always sure, but it is connected to going beyond ourselves. And that’s exactly what I did which I consider a turning point in my life. I wish you the same revelation!

Sarah Williams is a lifestyle blogger and online entrepreneur who shares her ideas about  how to date better on her blog: Wingman Magazine. Her ultimate goal is to empower men to become the best versions of themselves and help them benefit from social interactions. She is passionate about powerful, conscious living.

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Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.



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People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma



Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.


Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:


1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.


2. Persistent Pain

Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.

4. A strong need for control

It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
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3 Simple Steps to Cultivate Courage and Create a Life of Meaning

we cultivate meaning in our lives when we pursue our calling



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Our deepest human desire is to cultivate meaning in our lives. Our deepest human need is to survive. (more…)

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Grit: The Key to Your Ultimate Greatness

Grit is an overlooked aspect of success, but it plays a critical role.



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A grit mindset is an essential key to your greatness. It’s what separates those who achieve their goals from those who give up and never reach their potential. It’s also the difference between success and failure, happiness and misery. If you want to be great and achieve your dreams, then you need grit. Luckily, it’s something that can be learned. Please keep reading to learn more about grit and discover four ways to develop it. (more…)

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