Connect with us

Life

4 Science-Backed Tips That Will Improve Your Social Life

Published

on

How to improve your social life

No one can deny being socially skilled is one of the most crucial traits one can ever have. As Dale Carnegie once noticed, more than 80% of your success is due to your character and people skills. Your ability to lead people and convince them with your ideas will always remain important.

Here are four science-backed tips which will improve your social life regardless of your social background:

1. Make People Open Up with The CCA Technique

Do you want to always have something to say and never worry about awkward silence? Author and Speech Pathologist, Carol A. Fleming has an interesting technique she uses to break the ice. She calls it, “Comment, Comment, then Ask.” Fleming realized that if you want to ask someone a personal question, it is less creepy and more comfortable to throw in a couple of comments in order to justify your request for information.

For instance, if you are in a convention and want to ask a stranger what brought them here, you can get a good response if you phrase it like this, “They certainly have a lot of booths set up. There were not nearly as many people last year. Have you been to this convention many times before? If you’ve noticed, this request consists of three pieces:

  1. The first comment: They certainly have a lot of booths set up.
  2. The second Comment: There were not nearly as many people last year.
  3. The final question: Have you been to this convention many times before?  

I`ve been using this technique for years, and it’s amazing, especially when I’m with strangers and don’t know what to say. To be good at this, use it on everything you see, from the stuff in your room to what you watch on T.V. Practice for two weeks straight, and I guarantee you’ll amaze yourself.

“To be interesting, be interested.” – Dale Carnegie

2. The Snowball Technique: Do What Athletes Do

The Snowball Technique is very simple. Anytime you have an important meeting make sure you first warm up your social skills by talking, smiling or even saying hi to 10 or 20 people.

Conversations are more like sports, you can’t play well until you warm up. People who have excellent social skills goof around with others the moment they leave home. They greet neighbors, wink at toddlers and have small talk with anyone they can talk to, so they`re already at their peak when it’s time for important meetings, dates or hangouts.

The next time you feel anxious, don’t blame or judge yourself, just remember to warm up and slowly build your confidence by talking to 10 or 15 easy targets. Eventually, your snowball will grow, words will come naturally, you will smile more, and begin to feel more confident.

3. Point Out Similarities

According to studies, people will like you more if you let them know how similar you are to them. Social psychologists Elaine Walster and Ellen Berscheid, believe people make friendships based on their shared interests. In other words, we like to be around those who agree with us because their similarities make us feel less alone and their predictability makes us feel more in control.

Behavioral investigator and bestselling author, Vanessa Van Edwards, shares the same beliefs. She believes that people magnets use every opportunity to highlight the common grounds they share with others.  A magnet will say things like, “Wow, you like Orange Is the New Black? I’m an addict,” or ”You’re gluten-free? Join the club.”

Whereas a people repeller will shut others down with stuff like “You know, I never really got into Orange Is the New Black. I thought it was kinda boring.” Or “You’re one of those gluten-free people? Don’t you think that’s a fad?”

“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.” – Ernest Hemingway

4. Observe and Imitate

The easiest and fastest way to learn social skills is to hang around those whose social skills are better than yours. As studies have found, you will soon pick up some of those skills and your performance will improve without consuming your reservoir of willpower and mental energy.

Entrepreneur and bestselling author, Scott Adams used this technique to build his social skills. He noticed that outgoing kids usually come from outgoing families not because they have specific genes but because they mimic their older peers. If you do the same thing and find yourself some role models, then you will become like them without even knowing.

What are some things you do to help improve your social life? Comment below!

Marwan Jamal is a fitness and health blogger at healthline.com. He’s a great fan of the gym and a healthy diet. He follows the trends in fitness, gym, and healthy life and loves to share his knowledge through useful and informative articles.

Advertisement
1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Shane

    Jan 22, 2018 at 9:16 pm

    Great article. Never heard of the CCA technique before. I’m going to have to try it out.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life

3 Ways the Dalai Lama Inspires Radical Self Care in His Daily Routine

Published

on

dalai lama daily routine
Image Credit: Fortune

The Dalai Lama is best known for his spiritual teachings on peace, joy, mindfulness and serenity. While these teachings are rooted in spirituality, they are also applicable and beneficial to anyone no matter their faith system or beliefs. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

How to Properly Manage Your Time So You Can Fit More Into Your Day

Published

on

how to manage your time better
Image Credit: Unsplash

Time is the only actual resource that matters. Yet, as with the majority of things that people should take care of, most of us run short on time. No matter if you’re a busy entrepreneur trying to get your business tasks organized, programmist who’s working 9-to-5 and tries to get the most out of after-work time or even a university student who strives to harness his schedule. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

Why You Need to Push Yourself and Aim High in Everything You Do

Published

on

adversity
Image Credit: Unsplash

You’ve heard of S.M.A.R.T goals, correct? In order not to set yourself up for failure, experts tell us we need to pick goals that are smart, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-oriented. This makes sense, of course. But here is the wrinkle— S.M.A.R.T goals were created as a managerial tool in organizations. On a personal level, easily achievable aspirations are demotivating. “Easy” doesn’t equal “fulfilling.” Often, it doesn’t even give you a temporary burst of happiness. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

How Mindfulness Can Improve Your Productivity in 3 Easy Steps

Published

on

mindfulness exercises
Image Credit: Unsplash

How many times a day do you look at your phone? How much would someone have to pay you to quit Facebook? Has your attention span increased over the last few years or has it decreased? Chances are, you probably looked at your phone less than 10 minutes ago, someone would have to pay you over $100 to quit Facebook right now, and your attention span has likely decreased over the last 2 years. (more…)

Continue Reading

Trending