Life
How To Stop Caring What Others Think

One of the biggest reasons why people don’t go after what they want in life is because they care too much about what others think. Getting over the fear of embarrassment or failure is the key to start living the life that you want.
So here is a break down for the formula that I have used to help boost my confidence and to laugh in the face of my own personal embarrassment.
This is how you stop caring:
This Is A Muscle
You can’t magically fix this problem over night. Becoming confident in yourself and not caring about other’s opinions is like exercising a muscle.
No bodybuilder or weightlifter has ever stepped into the gym and been able to lift an impressive amount of poundage. Strengthening your muscles takes time and so does your tolerance towards adversity.
It’s A Habit
Who you are today is a product of your habits. You must start changing what you do on a day-to-day basis in order to build the ideal self that you would like to be in the near future.
Stop looking for the next magical fix that will give you the confidence and life that you deserve. This is yours for the taking, but just know it may take a little time.
Video
Weekly Tasks
These are a couple of tasks that I have personally used over the past three years in order to push me out of the comfort zone.
A couple of these things might be scary but I swear that doing them will give you the best feeling in the world. Because nothing compares to the feeling of overcoming a fear.
Do each task at least twice a week.
Week 1
Look at 10 people straight in the eye and hold eye contact. Don’t look away until they do.
Week 2
Smile and say hello to 10 strangers as you pass them on the street.
Week 3
Ask 10 strangers a ridiculous question.
Something I’ve done plenty of times is to pretend like I’m asking a serious question about directions and then say something like, “If I keep going that way, but my head is looking that way, but I’m thinking about a girl, will I get there?”
I like to see how long I can keep this going before the person starts thinking I’m crazy and walks away.
Week 4
Go to five clothing stores for the opposite sex and ask for opinions on how an outfit will look on you. And then ask if you can try it on.
Week 5
Strike up a conversation with a stranger and find out their a) greatest fear b) their greatest passion
Week 6
Have a 2-minute conversation with an imaginary friend in public.
Week 7
Get 10 strangers to hug you.
Week 8
Lie down in a busy store. Stay there until someone asks you if you’re ok.
Week 9
Get on an elevator and shout each floor number from top to bottom.
Week 10
Sing and dance a whole song in a public place.
Like I said… This is a Muscle
I never started doing the things in Week 10. I never even started in Week 5.
I started in Week 1 and slowly built my tolerance towards embarrassment over time. You don’t stop caring about what others think overnight.
This honestly took me a while to figure out. I was sometimes stuck with one activity for several weeks so don’t stress about it. You will get there if you stay with it enough.
Leave your comments and let me know how you went with your weekly adventures.
Life
The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance
Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see? (more…)
Life
Failing is More Important Than Succeeding
Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

People often consider failure a stigma. Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life. (more…)
Life
5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.
Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.
Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.
Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.
However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.
Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:
1. Unconscious Sabotage
Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.
This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.
Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.
This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.
3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma
4. A strong need for control
5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained
What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?
There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:
- Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
- Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
- Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
- Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
- Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.
It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.
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