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How A Trip To San Francisco Can Change Your Perspective

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A few months back, I was told by a few people to take a holiday. Without any real plan, I booked flights to San Francisco and LA. Having never traveled to the US before, I wasn’t sure what to expect or how the country would make me feel at the end of my trip.

When I arrived in downtown San Francisco, the city felt strangely like Melbourne where I’m from. On the first day, I hired a bike and rode across the Golden Gate Bridge. It was only once I got near the coastline that the city felt very different.

The Golden Gate Bridge is work of art and no words can describe it. It’s simply beautiful and a marvel of modern day engineering. Getting to go over the bridge is an experience in itself. All of a sudden, all your worries and problems seem so far away, and all that matters is the current moment.

When I arrived on the other side of the bridge, I took a ferry back past Alcatraz which was a strange and eerie contrast. Everyone asked me why I never bothered to visit the island; the reason was that I don’t believe in celebrating criminal activity or spending time in dark places like a prison.

Our world is shaped by the things we choose to surround ourself with, and prison shouldn’t be one of those things. The more I explored San Fran, the greater my love for Australia became. It’s easy to think that the grass is always greener, but it’s not. As it turns out, I already live in one of the greatest cities in the world.

Below are the 5 things that changed my perspective after visiting the US:

1. Whenever there is hype beware (Silicon Valley)

For the last few years, everyone has told me how magical Silicon Valley is. I decided on this trip to find out for myself. When I arrived in Silicon Valley, it looked like any other friendly neighborhood. I thought I must have been not quite where the action was.

After hopping in an Uber, I drove through the streets into the so-called hotspots. What I saw was normal houses, next to traditional business parks that happened to have the world’s most famous tech logos stuck to the side of the building.

I gazed in wondering what magic was occurring inside and what the secret cool aid was that they were all drinking. Thankfully, I got my chance to get behind the closed doors and the private security that surround these buildings like a prison.

Don’t get me wrong; Silicon Valley creates some amazing things in our world, but these same ideas, products, and services can be created anywhere across the globe. The awesomeness that is created is not just possible in Silicon Valley; it’s possible anywhere. Silicon Valley just has a high concentration of very cool companies in one place.

2. San Fran business culture is phenomenal

There was definitely something in the water as I visited each of the famous San Fran companies such as Google, Facebook, and LinkedIn. If I had to link this good feeling to anything, I would say it’s probably that the employees feel they’re changing the world.

What they’re working on is the stuff of dreams, and they know it. It’s not about being better than each other but it’s about working together to do seriously cool stuff. There is no real sense of ownership, and you’re free to go off and try out an idea.

Failure is celebrated, and the only must is innovation”

If your business is not growing, it’s dying in San Fran. Once high-growth products like Google Adwords are begin replaced, and nobody is negative about that fact.

Declining performance in certain products is expected, and as long as you’re building the next big thing, then it’s fine. San Fran isn’t about the location itself; it’s about the people who live and work there. The attitude of “anything is possible” is infectious.

The perceived downside to this attitude is that San Fran is full of elitist snobs that think they’re better than everyone else. I for one didn’t get a whiff of this vibe and think that this idea is more of a scarcity / jealousy mindset than anything else.

3. Beauty is all around us

One of my friends in San Fran commented that I was always making observations about the simplest things that he never notices. The way the traffic lights change, the way the trams look – everything was beautiful to me.

As soon as I returned home, the beauty of these same basic things was all of a sudden ignored again. I learned that if you see the beauty not just when you are in a new country, but when you are home, your perspective begins to change.

You find the good in life’s small pleasures, and your mind stops racing ahead for the next bit of technological dopamine. It still bothers me how much I look at my phone hoping for the little red notification to appear.

4. Homelessness is psychological

I was told to expect lots of homelessness, but the size of the problem was bigger than I imagined. I’ve seen homelessness before and got used to it. In San Fran, it wasn’t just that there were people who didn’t have a home; they were also mentally ill and shouted at people for no reason.

The problem is so big that it’s hard to ignore. Everywhere you go, you can’t avoid the issue. I found this to be a good thing because it taught me that problems shouldn’t be ignored, they should be solved. Everything I brought in San Fran had an extra tax. Initially, I had no idea why the advertised price always varied from what you paid until I asked (stupid me).

The extra tax was supposed to help the homeless people. I couldn’t see any sign of them being helped. It felt more like they were being ignored in the hope that they would take their problems elsewhere.

The lesson I learnt was that the homeless don’t need our money; they need psychological assistance if we really want to make a difference.

5. Being out of our comfort zone is a must

San Fran taught me that when I’m out of my comfort zone, I learn the most. It’s a nice feeling to have no idea where you’re going and to get lost once in a while. It’s funny too when you think that your destination is not far away until you discover how hilly San Fran can be in some parts.

Like with any downside, the upside was I got some much-needed exercise. I’m like a kid in a new city because I love to map things out in my mind and memorise where everything is. Within a few days, people were asking me for directions because they thought I was a local.

“Our comfort zone is where we are safe in the womb of life. Our real self is everything beyond that” – James Altucher

Strangely enough, I was able to tell them where to go. Pushing beyond our comfort zone allows us to see the world in a different way and interact with new kinds of people. I met many interesting characters during my travels that shared ideas with me that will forever change me.

The rush of excitement I got when I learned where the world was heading through technology is something that is hard to forget. Seeing people’s passion for changing the world one step at a time is the type of experience I was hoping to have from the start. Anything is possible as long as we collaborate and believe in humankind.

How are you going to change your perspective of the world for the better? Let me know on my website timdenning.net or my Facebook.

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship.You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

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4 Comments

4 Comments

  1. Thea

    Oct 5, 2016 at 3:42 am

    Wow, we’re planning to go to san francisco next week. Good thing I found this article, it my first time to go there but not my first to go to the US though, last time I went there was back in 2009 at the East Coast. 🙂

    • Tim Denning

      Oct 8, 2016 at 10:28 am

      That’s cool Thea that this post came at the right time for you. Enjoy your trip and check out some of the sights I mentioned. Take care!

  2. Toño

    Oct 1, 2016 at 5:49 pm

    Hello Tim! Firstly, thank you soooo very much for posting article about your Great American Adventure and sharing your photos with us! I loved the content and Golden Gate picture is epic! Also, you look like a badass with sunglasses, they fit you quite well haha 😀

    I have to tell you I know exactly what you mean, by describing ‘all your worries and problems seem so far away’, as I have experienced that myself few times, and mostly it was trip-related, you feel free from everything and ready to conquer the world, or something similar. And yes man, you live in one of the most amazing country in the world, leave alone the city. In my childhood I have always dreamed to live there, don’t know why. I have read lots of good things and I believe Australia in the top list of the most wealthy, healthy and high standards places.

    On the subject, I really connect with your ‘Beauty is all around us’ paragraph. I am exactly the same, it was eerily familiar when I read it because I act like this in a new places, amazed at everything, including trash bins, yet when I am back home I immediately turn on a resistant mode and ignore those simple thins I so loved while being at the different place. How weird huh? This urge to always move onto a new place so I can satisfy the level of dopamine, my very own pursuit of happiness. That’s a great thing to ponder on and meditate. My next session will be dedicated exactly to this thing. Thank you Tim.

    And your point on homelessness is very spot on. it is indeed rather state of mind and the issue should be addressed at the right side, not being avoided or misunderstood. I mean, every single one of us can experience this, whether you have millions of dollars or not. It does not matter.

    Our Achilles heel, the comfort zone. is always there to cuddle us and hide from the ‘danger’ of the world, making us fear more. James Altucher said it beautifully, I can confirm this – I rarely being my truly self, because I often under someone else’s skin. I must take all the steps to change that.

    Tim, your article touched me deeply and I enjoyed all the pictures and lessons you gave. Thank you for being an amazing you, for your time and passion, for your love and care! I greatly appreciate that 🙂

    Take care and have a wonderful day.

    • Tim Denning

      Oct 3, 2016 at 12:04 am

      Toño thanks for the kind words and glad you like the sunnies. San Fran is cool but I wouldn’t suggest you live there. You’ve picked up my key points really well and it’s cool you had a similar experience. I feel very lucky to live in Australia and to have the tools to avoid pitfalls like homelessness. Now it;s about helping others get that same experience.

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Life

How to Harness the Power of Your Personal Narrative

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Are you “living up” or “living down” to your personal narrative? When you set out to achieve an important goal, you’ll come face-to-face with many obstacles, such as starting a new business and not having your prospects reply to your prospecting emails. Perhaps you’ve had an interview for a new job and learned you didn’t make the final round of applicants. 

In those difficult moments, you have to have an internal conversation with yourself, known as self-talk. What do you say? How do you feel? You may find yourself succumbing to negativity or failing to believe in your own self-worth. If so, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. We’re all easily overwhelmed by our doubts and fears, because it’s what makes us human.

However, these feelings can not only shape a sense of identity, but also allow our doubt and fear to determine the outcome. When this happens, it’s vital to understand how to have the courage and conviction to move forward despite the obstacles. This includes moving forward in the midst of struggling, even when success seems lightyears away. This may seem daunting, but the answer is right in front of us. It lies in our personal narrative.

“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.” – Walt Disney

What is a personal narrative?

A personal narrative is a life-script that is often followed without question or protest. The conversations you have internally, known as self-talk, make up the core component to our personal narrative. Your self talk represents a powerful belief system that’s baked into our day-to-day existence.

Each of us possess a personal narrative that encompasses a belief system that shapes us and what we see as possible in our lives. As a result, we either ​live up or ​live down to that personal narrative.

While a personal narrative is the starting place, it’s a powerful one. On one hand, when a negative narrative becomes suffocating, it can be hard to escape. This will lead you to foster the belief that you’re incapable of accomplishing something, ensuring that you’ll be less likely to continue to take the necessary steps in the direction of a dream

Your narrative may be so powerful that you may just assume the worst, ending any possibility for you to put in the necessary time, effort and perseverance required to achieve a different outcome.

“The inner speech, your thoughts, can cause you to be rich or poor, loved or unloved, happy or unhappy, attractive or unattractive, powerful or weak.” – Ralph Charell

Cultivating positive narratives

On the other hand, what if we possessed personal narratives that were more positive? This  is not just positive thinking, because it is the practice of consciously cultivating a narrative that you could live up to instead​. Imagine how a more positive narrative could support more preferable outcomes.

In life, this may sound like, “I plan to do well in this interview, so I am going to take every action to support that expectation – like working with a career coach.” Or it may sound like, “Because I am someone who tries hard even when I am overwhelmed or uncomfortable, I am going to ask for help if I feel stuck.” That way, when a challenge arises – as they always do, you will grow to trust in your ability to navigate it.

The more you practice this, the more you will come to realize that your personal narrative really represents the essence of who you are. Your self-talk will evolve into someone who plans to do well during an interview, a business meeting, or a workout class because you become someone who invests in their personal well-being as an extension of your self-concept.

Cultivating positive narratives is not a what-if situation. It is an intentional practice that everyone can benefit from. It provides the framework for who you can become. Most importantly, it’s the key to help us transform into the best version of ourselves, while defending our dreams against a spiral of fear or self-doubt.

So, what does your personal narrative sound like? And how can you live up to it? Share with us below!

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Life

5 Reasons It’s Important to Understand What You Want to Do With Your Life

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No matter your age or your place in life, it is perfectly normal to not know exactly what your next steps should be. There are many factors that can contribute to this situation but it is always important to remember that everything happens for a reason and that this will help you build a much happier you.

There are many ways for you to understand what you should be doing with your life and there are just as many reasons why you should work towards getting a better understanding of those reasons.

If you wish to turn any situation around and start working towards finding your purpose, here are some of the most important reasons why:

1. You will be able to set long term goals for the future

Setting long term goals is one of the things that will help you feel more secure and certain about your future. Instead of relying on living day by day and trying to figure out what your next steps will be without having a future ultimate goal, you will now be able to plan accordingly so that your every step will bring you a step closer to making that dream come true.

One of the things many people forget though is that every plan, no matter how well-organized and planned out it is, will need to be adapted to every situation the person is experiencing. Knowing what your ultimate goal is will help you handle every change of plans with more confidence and will allow you to manoeuvre every situation and turn your problems into positive outcomes.

2. You will get rid of a lot of anxiety

One of the best things about finally getting a better understanding of what you wish to do with your life is that you will finally start feeling less anxious and unsure about the future. Having a certain plan you can follow and looking forward to making a big goal come true will help rid yourself of negative thoughts and allow you to be able to focus on achieving your dreams.

Anxiety is a very common problem in the time we live in and it can make a lot of people feel less productive and scared to take risks, especially in a professional manner. As a result, they tend to hold themselves back and do fewer things than they are capable of, simply because they are too scared to dare.

Realizing what you wish to do in your life and working towards achieving your goals will help you feel less stressed and even if you do, this type of anxiety could actually help you be much more productive and eager to do your best in order to make your dreams manifest into reality.

3. You will be much happier

Understanding what you wish to do in your life will truly help you finally figure out what you are meant to do in your life. For some people, it can help them find their purpose and give them a new perspective on everything they do in their everyday life.

This will help you feel a lot happier and will put your mind at ease, as you won’t have to continue wondering if the path you have chosen to follow is the right one for you or not. Feeling more certain of your decisions will help you feel a lot more confident and happier since you will feel strong enough to overcome anything that might come your way from now and on.

4. You won’t lose time or energy on smaller goals

Setting shorter goals without knowing what you are meant to do in the long run will cost you a lot of energy and time. This will happen as you will spend a lot of time planning out your every move and it will cause you to feel stressed and worried about every little thing going wrong.

Smaller goals will still be important but you won’t spend much time planning them as you would if you didn’t know what your end goal would be. Saving energy and preparing both mentally and physically for reaching your goal will help you achieve a much healthier outlook on dealing with everyday situations and it will make you more excited to complete your ambitions.

5. You will become an expert in one field

Last but not least, another important reason why you should try and understand exactly what you are meant to do in your life is that you will be able to focus all of your time and energy on learning as much as possible and growing only in one certain field.

The uncertainty of having a set goal for your future can make you feel like you need to know many different things in different fields in order to be able to succeed in life and make a living. While having knowledge in various fields is something that will prove to be useful, you will never fully be able to become an expert in one field and make a name for yourself in that sector.

A long term goal will allow you to either study or work full time on one subject you truly enjoy and are good at. This will help you build your reputation, make connections and allow yourself to enjoy and love the path you have chosen even more. As a result, you will be much happier and content with the end goal you have chosen and you will be able to work even harder to achieve all of your dreams.

Working towards a happier you

You might be at a point in your life where you feel like not a lot of things are truly worth your time but the truth is that every little thing you do will help you find what you are meant to do. This will help you feel happy and content and allow you to tackle every issue you come across with much less anxiety and fear.

You will find a lot of stability and comfort in setting a big and important goal for your future and this will allow you to start being more productive and happy to tackle every problem that might come your way. Your life will always be full of surprises and unplanned events but hard work and dedication on your goals will allow you to become the best version of you and enjoy every step of the way.

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Life

3 Ways to Stay Strong and Push Through When Hardships Arise

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We all have trials and tribulations, and most times they are out of our control. I believe that’s why it can be so frustrating when trouble arises, because we feel powerless. But this isn’t true! How we perceive these times gives us power, and will ultimately dictate the quality of our lives.

Each event can have many interpretations. You can ask two people about a situation they both went through, and sometimes you’ll get two completely different answers! Most times this isn’t because one was being truthful and the other wasn’t, but because of how they perceived the events that took place.

That’s how powerful perceptions are, so why not use this power to our benefit? Instead of thinking on what was lost, think of what there is to gain. When you think positively, it helps you from not feeling stuck, and helps you look towards the future. 

Below are three things to consider whenever a hardship comes your way:

1. This is an opportunity for me to grow

Viewing troubling times as an opportunity to improve and grow will give you a sense of freedom and happiness because you’ve decided to lead your life, as opposed to just accepting your life. Some people just accept the things that happen to them/around them. When you have this mindset, you are telling yourself there is nothing you can do in that situation, and you are giving away your power.

This will affect not only your mood, but also the people around you, especially if you’re a leader. They feed off your energy and body language. When you focus on growth, you can think more clearly on solutions, which is what you want. It’s ok to feel sad, frustrated, or confused. If you want to be successful, you will feel all of these, and quite often. When you do, recognize what your feeling, but don’t feed it. If you do, it will grow.

“If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.” – Jim Rohn

2. Don’t focus on the problem, find the solution

This sounds pretty simple but how many of us focus more energy on the problem and why it happened or who did it, instead of trying to focus immediately on the solution? I learned this in the military. If something goes wrong, my superiors were less concerned with who did it and more concerned with finding a solution to the problem, and as quickly as possible.

But I was once guilty of this thinking, and sometimes I slip back into that mode of thinking when my emotions are strong. Changing your mindset to focus on solutions will give you a sense of power, which will calm you, because you feel in control. This in turn, will help you think clearly and rationally, as opposed to emotionally. Furthermore, being in a more relaxed state of mind will allow you to absorb information more clearly so you can learn from the incident and become a better you.

3. Determine how the hardship improves your character

What was being tested during your hardship? Patience? Empathy? Communication? Understanding? Endurance? I remember working for a boss I did not like. He seemed to pick on me, and I couldn’t understand it. I went above and beyond what was asked of me, but people were still being promoted quicker than I was.

To give a little depth on my perception at the time, I was born and raised in Brooklyn NY. Not poor, but close to it. So respect is something that is valued greatly in neighborhoods I come from, because we don’t have much else. Respect was your money, and could get you things money couldn’t buy.

Now everyone wants respect, but me, I need it that much more. So when I felt he wasn’t giving me respect, I almost convinced myself to handle these matters. Imagine the people you train, passing you by and you know their work ethic doesn’t match yours. It sucked.

I talked to my dad, who always gives great council, and he told me it wouldn’t be wise. He told me to look for ways to grow, and I did. And let me tell you, during that time I learned things that cannot be taught in classrooms because you can only be learned through experience. My endurance was really challenged, but made me wiser and stronger, which made me better equipped to deal with future troubles I’d have. Because of those lessons, I was able to teach others about my experience and give wise counsel.

“Lead a life of your own design, on your own terms. Not one that others or the environment have scripted for you.” – Tony Robbins

When those times come, ask yourself where you’re weak and what you can you do to improve on that weakness. Finding something you’re not good at should make you happy, because it gives you a chance to improve! If you suck at something, do something about it! Don’t wallow in self-pity. It’s not a fruitful exercise.

When hardships come your way, your perception is a powerful weapon that you must manipulate, don’t let it manipulate you. Ask yourself how can this help you grow, what positive opportunity is hidden in the hardship and focus on the solution, not the problem. Doing these things will put the power back in your court. Give it a shot, it changed my life!

How do you keep your head up high when hardships arise? Share your thoughts and advice down below!

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Life

7 Essential Mindset Shifts From Gary Vaynerchuk That’ll Help You Have an Amazing Life

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Image Credit: Gary Vaynerchuk

Gary Vaynerchuk is full of little gems to success if you listen with an open mind. His unfiltered way of sharing old school values mixed with modern day approaches is remarkably simple and highly contagious. In this world of instant gratification, everyone is focused on doing things faster in order to produce exponential results.

When our visions don’t become an instant reality, we play the comparison game and judge ourselves. This ultimately leads to a decline in our health and crushes our visions. Many of us want to be an overnight success but need a better psychological framework to endure the ride.

Here are 7 perspectives that Gary Vaynerchuk is currently popularising that can help your mindset game be stronger:

1. Aim for happiness 

Gary Vaynerchuk’s definition of happiness is “being able to do what you want at all times.” This does not mean quit because your work doesn’t make you happy right now, especially if it is the stepping stone for your ideal lifestyle. 

For a period of time you will need to grind and do tasks that are unenjoyable. If happiness is not within your metrics of success, you will eventually suffer from an irregularity in your mental or physical health, which in turn has a downward ripple effect on your valued relationships. 

2. Enjoy paying your dues

Every industry has its own set of rules to work up the chain of command. You need to learn to love each role and responsibility that comes with that. Going in with a curious and enthusiastic energy is bound to shine through and show those around you how serious you are. 

Be present and learn from every experience you encounter. This is a journey for bigger and better things but you need to put in the time, work and sacrifice to be rewarded. Life is all about what you put into it. You don’t know how these earlier stages will serve you in years to come, so take pride in the journey and appreciation for the lessons and people you meet along the way.

3. Obsessively love what you do

You should always be doing what you want, especially if you have a clearly defined purpose. Purpose is such an energizing force, regardless of whether you are earning $40,000 or $4,000,000. If you really love what you’re doing and it’s where you want to be then you’re already winning. 

Always start with what you love because the only way you’re going to hustle hard enough is if you love it. It’s hard to get going around something you’re not passionate about. When you learn to love the game more than the trophy, the game gives you, and you’re on your way up.

“You have to understand your own personal DNA. Don’t do things because I do them or Steve Jobs or Mark Cuban tried it. You need to know your personal brand and stay true to it.”- Gary Vaynerchuk

4. Don’t be driven by the money

To do extremely well in the game of business without disrupting other pillars in your life, you must wake up each morning pondering what solutions need to be found today. You need to be wildly curious and driven by the game of business on a micro level while seeing the macro outcomes. 

When you’re excited to play the game, you become absorbed in mastery over playing with your phone, gossiping with friends and watching mindless content. You relentlessly invest in yourself and your growth, which in turn is remunerated with wealth.

5. Have gratitude

Have you ever thought about the fact that the odds of being a human being are 400 trillion to one? You must create an unbelievably clear perspective of how lucky we are to be human. This in turn makes it a struggle to dwell on things that don’t matter. 

Focus your attention on the things that you value and appreciate. Appreciate your good health and family, because you’ll value it more. Appreciate your gifts, friends, work and life. By doing this, your perception begins to shift. You see the blessings of your life, versus the broken parts.

6. Adversity is your superpower

Adversity and humble beginnings is an incredible framework to happiness, especially when you layer positivity and optimism around your difficulty. We all have hardships and various scenarios that throw us off balance along the way. 

Our super power is when we use that as fuel to drive us to be less audacious and experience more, instead of being held back. What you think and focus on grows. Shift the perspective in your mind so your adversity doesn’t define you, but instead drives you.

“It’s insane to me to ask anybody to be what they’re not. Know what you know the best, love the most. That’s always going to be the answer to the thing that you have the best shot at winning at.” – Gary Vaynerchuk

7. Be excited everyday because you get to play

Learn how to start your morning well and continue that energy throughout the day. That vigour builds momentum that will allow you to actually make your mark. Be fired up that you have given yourself a clear vision and your making moves to play a strong game. This type of mindset gives you an intrinsic pull to do and be better daily rather than external motivation, which over time dies out.

Mindset is everything and it all falls down to your perspective of things. Don’t judge yourself by what you accomplish daily, instead, judge it yearly. It takes years of great creative work to be recognized. Be patient. In the meantime, look at your daily habits and ask yourself if they are causing you to evolve or revolve. Are you moving forward, or just moving in circles? Take constant action to move forward and be grateful you have the opportunity to play in the game of life. 

What’s your favorite Gary Vaynerchuk mindset from the article? Share your thoughts below!

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