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5 Ways to Let Go of Anger and Live a Happier Life

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Someone once said, “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die”. Anger destroys happiness, and letting go of anger and resentment is one of the main keys to living a happy life.

Listed below are several ways to let go of anger and start living a more peaceful, happy life:

1. Change negative thoughts to positive ones

Negative thoughts can fester in a person’s mind like open wounds, and the quickest way to get rid of them is to change them into positive thoughts. When you find yourself thinking negatively of a person or situation, try to seek out the silver lining. Look for the good in that person or situation, and focus on that.

Like it or not, our attitudes are the product of our thoughts adding up over time, and negative thoughts lead to anger and resentment. Positive thoughts, though, can at least lead to peaceful acceptance and tolerance, even if you never truly grow to like the person or situation itself.

According to the Mayo Clinic, “When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you’re better able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.” Start turning negative thoughts into positive ones, and you’ll find that anger and resentment (as well as the stress and unhappiness that they bring) are a lot less likely to form.

2. Let it all out

Self-help magazines, blogs, and books are filled with advice telling you how damaging it is to hold anger inside you, and they’re right. Anger and resentment never really goes away, it just builds and builds like pressure inside of a rocket until eventually it either explodes or severely damages your mental health and well-being.

The trouble is that people who hold back their anger most often do so because it feels like it’s the right thing to do. They don’t want to be confrontational or bothersome, and they may feel like bottling up their frustrations really is the best way to handle them.

In reality, though, bottling up your anger is one of the worst things you can do. While it’s not a good idea to lose your control, and you should certainly keep your temper in check, it’s important to vent from time to time.

Confront the things that are angering you head on, and say your peace. You’ll feel much better if you do.

“It is important that we forgive ourselves for making mistakes. We need to learn from our errors and move on.” – Steve Maraboli

3. Associate with positive people

We’re all a product of our surroundings. If you choose to associate with positive people, their optimism and positivity will wear off on you. If you choose to associate with negative people, though, their anger and resentment will inevitably wear off on you as well.

The motivational speaker and wildly successful entrepreneur Jim Rohn once said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with”. If this is true, which evidence certainly seems to suggest that it is, what does that average look like? Hopefully, the average created from the five people you spend most of your time with would be a positive one.

If, though, it would be one that harbors anger, resentment, and negativity, it might be healthy for you to reevaluate the people you associate with the most.

4. Focus on self-love

You are your own priority. At the end of the day, what everyone else does and says is outside of your control. People who are unable to recognize or accept this often find themselves trying to control and fix situations that are beyond them. When it doesn’t work out like they’d hoped, they become angry and resentful.

Instead, focus on the one thing you have control of: yourself. Rather than becoming angry at someone else, shift your attention inward.

What can you do to make yourself happy at this moment? As long as you don’t use it as a crutch, a little self-indulgence from time to time can go a long way.

5. Make a mental note not to add “hate” in the world

It’s a sad reality, but there’s an awful lot of hate in this world already. You don’t have to look very far to see instances of hate, resentment, and, in far too many cases, pure evil. It exists at national levels, cultural levels, and personal levels.

While we are working to change the hate that exists at larger levels such as national and cultural, we can also change the hate that exists at the personal level by refusing to add any more of it to the world ourselves.

By avoiding anger and resentment, we are doing our part to not only improve our own health and happiness, but also to make the world at large a better place. If just a small percentage of people on earth were to adopt this mindset, think how much better off the world would be?

Make a mental note to not add any more hate to the world through anger and resentment, and start making the world a better place one person at a time.

“It’s not an easy journey, to get to a place where you forgive people. But it is such a powerful place, because it frees you.” – Tyler Perry

Anger and resentment are two of the most harmful emotions a person can have. They are destructive not only to the person themselves, but also to everyone around them. Fortunately, we don’t have to be slaves to these emotions. Do everything you can to let go of any anger you might have, and start living a happier, healthier lifestyle.

How has letting go of anger improved your life? Please leave your thoughts below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Kolyanne Russ is an Accounting Manager with CPA designation for one of the largest commercial real estate companies in North America. She is also a founder of Pinch of Attitude blog. It focuses on attitude-building, self-improvement, and lifestyle design to help people draw the right action plan and achieve a desirable balance between success and happiness. Her goal is to share her personal experiences as guidance for others to learn from and build the life of their dreams and experience true happiness in every area of their life. You can connect with her on Twitter @pinchofattitude.

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Knowing Your Message vs Delivering Your Message

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Have you ever sent a text message only to have it misinterpreted by the person reading it? Happens all the time. Have you ever given a presentation that you were totally prepared for only to have it fall flat? Happens all the time. Have you ever had someone ask you something like, “Why are you mad?” when you were not at all mad? Happens all the time. (more…)

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The 3 Most Important Things I Learned About Personal Growth

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When you look back on your life, what do you want to think about? Do you plan to reminisce on all of the good things that have happened and how they shaped who you are today? Or would you rather remember all of the bad decisions, challenging experiences, and mistakes made that hurt or wasted a portion of your life?

In my opinion, I think it is important to reflect on both. While it’s important to remember the hardships we’ve been through in our lives – without them we wouldn’t be where we are now. There are 3 very specific areas that I feel have helped me grow in a personal sense more than anything else in my life so far. 

These aren’t simple lessons in a book or a lecture that you can just absorb and apply to your life. These are things that I’ve learned through experience and reflection, and I’m still learning and growing today.

1. We determine how much we’re worth by what we think about ourselves, others, and life in general.

This might seem like a pretty obvious lesson in life but it’s actually one of the most important because we can determine our own worth by how we think about ourselves and the world around us. If you’re looking for success in any kind of business or social setting (dating), then I’ll tell you right now that it doesn’t matter if you have 10 billion dollars or not – people are still going to judge you based on your thoughts and beliefs alone.

What determines our value isn’t necessarily what we do with our lives (which is often based on luck) but whether or not we believe that ‘our work’ is worthy or not in some sort of grand scheme or universe. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can always control how we value ourselves and others.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” – Maya Angelou

2. You don’t have to change your habits or personality just because someone else doesn’t like it – their opinions are THEIRS alone.

This is another one of those lessons that people tend to pick up on a little bit late in life, but if anything that makes its importance even worse! Basically, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to meet someone who has certain expectations of you as a person…but these expectations might not be realistic due to their motivations and personal beliefs. For example, sometimes parents might expect you to be a lawyer or doctor because that’s what they believe is best for their child.

However, this isn’t the case for everyone and so maybe your passion lies in music or writing novels. In this example, if you were also pressured into becoming a doctor – then there would obviously be some kind of conflict going on within yourself as a person. You should never have to give up something that you want to do just because someone else doesn’t like it! The reason why we’re put onto this Earth is to make our own choices and go after our OWN dreams instead of letting others determine what we can and cannot do with our lives .

3. You can’t change your life until you accept that you need to make a change.

When I was younger, I thought that this lesson would be pretty obvious – but as I got older, it really made me appreciate the fact that there are always different ways of perceiving our lives. For example, if someone wants to become rich and famous one day – their mind might simply overshadow any other possibility in their head because they feel like this is what they NEED to do right now.

However, this isn’t always true within our own lives because we think about things too literally instead of having an open mind. If you want to achieve success in any kind of business or social setting (dating) then you should be willing to try out different things instead of staying in your comfort zone. If you want something, then it’s up to YOU to actually go after it – nobody else is going to give it to you!

The three lessons above are some of the main things I want to pass on to everyone because they’ve come at an important time in my life where I need to start thinking about others instead of only myself. It’s great if we can learn to love ourselves first before anything else, but that doesn’t mean you should neglect everyone around you even though they might be your friends and family members!

If you enjoyed this article on the 3 most important things I learned about personal growth, then please share it with your friends and family! Also, check out my other articles on success & motivation as well as life lessons that could help people who are struggling with their life right now on lifengoal.com. Thanks for reading!

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​​4 Boss Level Growth Strategies That Create an Optimized Life

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Building a business is about more than sales, marketing, and flexing on social media. While those things tend to draw attention, they attract the wrong type of clients and are not how you build a sustainable and freedom-focused business. (more…)

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Practicing Self-Devotion: 3 Ways Towards a More Mindful and Compassionate You

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I can still hear the voices of my older relatives and my elementary school teachers telling me “be disciplined”, “keep at it”, to give time and energy towards what we want. As a young, impressionable child, I believed all those things because well, they made sense. They worked. And honestly, I felt like it’s the only way to flourish. (more…)

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