Connect with us

Life

4 Steps To Making Yourself A Better Person

Avatar

Published

on

We all experience them, setbacks. Professionally, within relationships, when trying to make ourselves a better person. The experience of things either not going as planned or failing as a whole.  It’s not a good feeling, and it can even keep us from moving forward in our lives in many ways.

But through a simple shift in how you handle a setback no matter if it’s a large or small set back, can change many things. You might not always be able to recover or fix what got you to where you are, but with a few simple steps you can make things better moving forward.

Here are the four steps on how to overcome a setback while making yourself a better person:

1. Let yourself experience the negative of the situation

Negative emotions and experiences often get a bad rap. It’s natural to want to maintain or obtain the natural high that our positive emotions give us and eliminate the negative emotions we feel. However, our negative emotions have a very real need in our lives. Our negative emotions inform us of when something (or someone) in our environment might need more attention, they help us build empathy as well as better connect with others.

Putting yourself in and staying in a negative state isn’t healthy, but allowing yourself to feel a very natural and normal part of something (the good and the bad) is the first to understanding what it means to you and your perspective on life. If you don’t allow yourself to have those feelings and process them during a setback, you won’t know how to move past them in the future. This is the real strength, understanding your negative emotions.

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” – Thomas A. Edison

2. Give yourself some easy wins

If it’s important to let yourself experience the negative side of things, what do you do when it’s time to move past a setback or negative experience, but you can’t? Change your focus and give yourself some easy wins. Giving yourself some easy wins is different than simply doing something that makes you feel happy. It’s focusing on doing something that makes you feel as if you have accomplished something (even if it’s just a little bit).

This could be anything from cleaning up around the house, beating a level in a video game, or even volunteering. The idea is to do something with an end goal that’s in sight, and you can easily reach. Make it a little bit of a challenge, of course, but give yourself a short term win.Giving yourself an easy win allows you to think of something more positive and get some of those feel good hormones going in your brain, making it easier to move past a setback.

 

3. Look at what didn’t work

It’s not the winning that teaches you how to be resilient. It’s the setback. It’s the loss. – Beth Brooke It’s important not to look at your setbacks as if they are ultimate failures, but instead just a learning experience. You might not have the same opportunity available to you immediately, or ever, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t lessons to be learned.

If we as humans are anything, we are an accumulation of our experiences at any one moment. So taking the time to look at those experiences, especially when we have had setbacks, to learn from them is priceless. You not only open up the opportunity to avoid the same negative experience in the future but to learn more about yourself.

 

4. Make a plan and give it another go

The biggest hurdle in dealing with a setback is giving things another go. But if you don’t (especially right away) it’s likely you won’t. Getting clear on what didn’t work is great, but what good is that if you don’t give things another try? The difficult part might be that circumstances aren’t going to be the same as before, and that’s okay.

That’s why it’s important to make a plan and be aware of how things have changed. By looking at new circumstances, understanding how it changes things, and then also why and what failed before you can create a plan of action or intention to give yourself a better outcome in the future.

“It’s not the winning that teaches you how to be resilient. It’s the setback. It’s the loss.” – Beth Brooke

Handling any setback isn’t easy, it can hurt emotionally in many different ways. It brings forward many feelings of failure and highlights some of the worst parts of ourselves. It’s not an easy thing to move on from the past, but when you take the time and effort to treat it as a learning experience instead, that setback just might be the lesson you needed to experience something great. As long as you allow yourself.

How have you overcome a setback? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below!

After getting laid off from her IT job in Corporate America in 2009, she ventured out into the online world and started her own business as a single mother of two. Now she is the CEO of a successful American-based Virtual Assistant company My Virtual Little Helper that employs people across America to help business owners and online entrepreneurs get more done. She is on a mission to help others do what she has done; build a career that helps others accomplish more while still having time for those that matter most. Join her at her website: Amanda Mock

Advertisement
3 Comments

3 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Kim Washington

    Jan 21, 2016 at 11:36 pm

    Excellent tips! When faced with a setback and I have had many, I remind myself the situation is only temporary. I then refocus and evaluate what went wrong, and then determine how to get past it. As a society, we must remember we learn, adapt, and overcome situations all the time. I believe there is always a silver lining, even in bad situations.

  2. Avatar

    Lawrence Berry

    Dec 1, 2015 at 11:27 pm

    These are some great self development tips and learning to live in the moment by truly getting in touch with your negative feelings can help you learn more about yourself. This is something I have to remember the next time I have a negative emotion because I never analyze the situation when Im upset. I believe I heard a monk talk about this a while back and they use this technique to learn more about themselves.

  3. Avatar

    Nick Scuderi

    Nov 30, 2015 at 1:20 am

    Good points to touch on. I think the best advice is to learn from your mistakes, and small victories are a great way to keep positive. I’m starting some videos that touch on these topics so it interested me a lot.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life

The Surprising Secret About Growth and Change

Avatar

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

Innovation and change drive business growth, but there’s one piece about growth and change that business owners and entrepreneurs often overlook. It’s not the most fun or glamorous piece, but if you recognize and accept it, the payoff is huge. This is particularly crucial for self-employed business owners when there’s little to no separation between yourself and your business. When your level of success equates to how much you have personally developed. I call it Growth Jet Lag, and when you know how to navigate it, you set yourself up for lasting success. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

Practicing Self-Devotion: 3 Ways Towards a More Mindful and Compassionate You

Avatar

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

I can still hear the voices of my older relatives and my elementary school teachers telling me “be disciplined”, “keep at it”, to give time and energy towards what we want. As a young, impressionable child, I believed all those things because well, they made sense. They worked. And honestly, I felt like it’s the only way to flourish. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

Identifying Your Emotions is the Key to Exponential Happiness

Avatar

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

In the weeks and months following the heinous terror attacks of September 11, millions of Americans decreased their domestic air travel. As domestic flying decreased, car travel increased where a study found that people opted to drive longer distances rather than fly. Not taking into account 9/11, there were 331 airplane crash fatalities in the U.S from 1751 crash events. What’s interesting is there were 42,000 driving-related deaths in that same year. The number of deaths in air travel and road travel remained relatively consistent in subsequent years. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

4 Life Changing Lessons I Learned by Starting a Podcast

Avatar

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

I had, and still have, a message I want to share with those that will listen. Heck, I am even willing to share it to those that are less than willing to listen. Therefore, I decided to start a podcast. A podcast focused on those that feel like the odds are stacked against them when it comes to venturing into those entrepreneurial waters. Those that have an inner belief that they can do it, but perhaps the people around them are less than enthusiastic about this new journey. 

Nonetheless, these Dark Horses, as I call them, buck the odds and run their own race to reach their own dreams and achieve their own goals. Little did I know that as I launched The Dark Horse Entrepreneur podcast, on a mission to teach others the lessons I have learned in business and in life, that I would be in turn learning even more lessons because of stepping out into the podcast arena. (more…)

Continue Reading

Trending