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3 Writing Exercises That Will Boost Your Confidence to New Levels




The road of personal development will ask you to look at what you really believe about yourself. Life is continually asking us if we believe we are abundant, successful, and valued. Having an awareness of purpose, mission, and a meaningful message are all key. Confidence is the bedrock of growth and success.

Here are my favorite writing exercises that are sure to build your confidence and your belief in yourself:

1. Why I Will Succeed

It’s all too common to spend precious time thinking about what could go wrong or to mentally recite all the reasons why you aren’t qualified enough. This exercise helps focus your thoughts in the right direction.

Get a piece of paper and a pen and write this at the top. Why I Will Succeed As A _____________________.

Take a few deep breathes and bring your whole body into the present moment. Let go of what you desire that is out in the future and focus your attention on the talents, abilities, and experience you have right now.

Write down all the reasons why you will succeed. Read this list out loud, taking a deep breath in between each one and feeling the words in your body. Speak these truths daily until you believe them to the marrow in your bones.

“Every sentence I utter must be understood not as an affirmation, but as a question.” – Niels Bohr

2. Success Affirmations

Stepping into success is about finding a way to soothe our ego into what is beyond our comfort zone. It’s our ego’s job to keep us in more of the same and it values safety above all else.

Purchase a journal and write these powerful affirmations regularly.

  • I am willing to be willing.
  • I am willing to take the next step.
  • I am listening and open to what is mine to do today.
  • It’s safe for me to be seen. It’s safe for me to live wholeheartedly. It’s safe for me to put myself first.
  • It’s safe for me to be as passionate as I really am. It’s safe for me to be vocal and expressive. It’s safe for me to be too much for others.
  • It’s safe for me to show up full strength. It’s safe for me to be smart.
  • It’s safe for me to receive large amounts of money. It’s safe for me to work with clients who light me up. It’s safe for me to say no when I don’t click with someone.
  • It’s safe for me to show others what I want and need. It’s safe for me to be completely myself. It’s safe for me to find a way that works for me.
  • It’s safe for me to play full out.

“Success is a process, a quality of mind and a way of being, an outgoing affirmation of life.” – Alex Noble

3. Capital T’s

A couple years ago I had my handwriting analyzed and what I learned was the one letter that is directly connected to our level of confidence is how you write the lowercase form of the letter “t”. I was instructed to raise the bar on every “t” I wrote in order to raise my confidence level.

As you can imagine, once you are in the habit of writing lower case t’s, it takes practice. Either in the morning right after you wake up or just before you fall asleep, write out 20-60  capital T’s on a piece of paper. It’s pretty amazing to notice how new neural pathways are formed and the affect they have on our lives and interactions with others.

So many think the secret to success in personal development is related to what you know or who you know. However, while these things have some importance, they are worthless if you don’t believe in yourself.

Get notebook and a pen that you love and start practicing these simple writing exercises today. What helps you with your confidence levels?

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Monique Alvarez has been using her 10+ years experience of entrepreneurship and leadership to help women around the world become powerful business owners as an international business consultant for the past nine years. She is a digital nomad and travels full time with her husband and two toddlers. If you’d like to learn more about becoming a powerful business owner visit You can also get her book, Success Redefined Travel, Motherhood, & Being the Boss here



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The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.



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Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

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How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.



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It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

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Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.



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People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma



Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.


Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:


1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.


2. Persistent Pain

Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.

4. A strong need for control

It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
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