Life

10 Small Changes in Your Daily Routine That Can Make a Big Difference in Your Life

Published

4 years ago

Aug 4, 2018

Image Credit: Twenty20.com

Self-realization is the key to self-transformation. So, as a part of my year-long self-improvement strategy in 2018, I have tried to identify and get the most out of my inherent abilities in the past few months. I am grateful that I realized this and was able to understand a different dimension of life, which is scientifically validated, but still beyond logic.

I found the following 10 small lifestyle changes quite effective in turning my life around:

1. Practice Gratitude When You Wake Up

Gratitude is a great means to keep going even if life gets tough. You may not have it all, but you do have something to be grateful for. Most people don’t even have the basics like a roof over their heads or food on their table. So, when you wake up, try to be grateful for the things you have. Make a list of the things you feel thankful about or start writing in a gratitude journal. While expressing gratitude at any point of the day is a good thing, there is no better time for it than early in the morning when your mind is fresh and calm.

2. Do Not Check Your Phone First Thing in the Morning

The first thing I did every morning was check my phone, just like 80% of smartphone users. Not anymore though, as I realized doing so did the worst kind of damage. The moment you check your phone, your mind starts thinking about the content you have just read. Thus, staying focused on the things that really matter becomes tough and your productivity decreases even before your day has begun. So, stay away from your phone in the morning.

3. Do Not Talk to Anyone for at least an Hour

Avoid talking to anyone for at least an hour every day. It’s a great way to reconnect with your inner self and heighten concentration. However, you need to start with small periods first. Try not talking for ten minutes initially and gradually work your way up. This period shouldn’t involve any dialogue, conversations (written or verbal), or gestures. So, pick a time when no one will disturb you.

“Motivation is what gets you started, habit is what keeps you going.” – Jim Rohn

4. Be with Yourself and Live in the Moment

The first hour after you wake up is the most energetic time of the day. So, it is the best time to be with yourself. Just sit quietly with your eyes closed and focus your complete attention on your breathing. Call it meditation if you like; I call it “Me-Time.” Try to live in the moment and keep your mind from wandering. It will improve your critical thinking, emotional intelligence, and concentration. With regular practice, you can also achieve peace of mind.

5. Do Everything with 10X the Involvement

When your body and mind are in sync, your productivity can reach its peak. One way to achieve this is to be mindful of your actions irrespective of how trivial they may seem. It’s called practicing mindfulness. Whatever it is you are doing, be there with 10X the involvement. Pay attention to the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and touches around you and your inner senses.

6. Learn to Be Happy for No Reason

Contrary to popular belief, being happy for no reason is quite natural because happiness is a state of mind. If you are waiting for someone or something to make you happy, you are missing the point of life. Inherent happiness can last longer and lift your spirit instantly. This is why when you feel happy, you can enjoy even a cold and tasteless meal. Just be happy for 30 minutes every day for no reason.

7. Don’t Accumulate Random Content

We are what we read and experience. So, be very careful about the information you collect and the way it affects your routine. I found these useful:

Choose Google over social media so that you search what you really need instead of coming across random content.
Similarly, choose Netflix or YouTube instead of TV to watch what you like.
Rather than listening to the radio, listen to podcasts to hear what you like.
Stop reading newspapers and start following trending news on Twitter instead.

“For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

8. Uninstall Social Media Apps and Turn Off Phone Notifications

Deleting all social media apps from my phone and turning off notifications has been the smartest decision I have made so far this year. An average person spends nearly two hours on social media daily amounting to five years and four months of their lifetime. However, it also leads to overthinking. Plus, a constantly buzzing phone is a distraction. Your phone shouldn’t govern your life.

9. Learn Not to Complain

Life is a series of obstacles, however, complaining about your problems is rarely helpful. If anything, it is counterproductive. Unless you want to feel depressed, stressed, and alone, you should learn not to complain. It isn’t easy, but, if you spend just a day without complaining, you will realize how enriching your life can be. You will have more time to think about the things that genuinely matter.

10. Moving from “I Know” to “I Don’t Know”

Having an “I-know-everything” attitude means you don’t have the eagerness to learn and explore new possibilities. However, shifting your mindset to “I don’t know” opens up new opportunities to shape your life. I have learned that the later attitude is also a conversation starter. Every conversation can result in knowing something new or getting to know an interesting person. Sometimes, I pretend to know nothing just to strike a conversation. Usually, I end up learning something interesting anyway.

What are some new habits that you’ve picked up along the way? Comment below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Manish Dudharejia

Manish Dudharejia is curiously passionate about learning everything about life and human beings. By passion, he is a student of Yogic Science, Yoga & Meditation practitioner, and a disciple of Sadhguru. By profession, he is an entrepreneur and founder of E2M Solutions Inc. When he is not working, he loves spending time with his darling daughter and seeking wisdom from industry veterans as well as by reading/listening/watching epic historical events/stories.

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Life

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Life

5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Published

6 days ago

Jan 25, 2023

Joel Brown (Founder of Addicted2Success.com)

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

1. Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

2. Persistent Pain

Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.

Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.

Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.

Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.

These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.

4. A strong need for control

It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.

This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.

It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.

These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.

If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.