4 Tips To Writing The Story Of Your Own Life

4 Tips To Writing The Story Of Your Own Life

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4 Tips To Writing The Story Of Your Own Life
Image Credit | thestorytellinghour

I have something I want to share with you; a fear. We all have that fear. A fear that by this time next year, I’ll still be here and not there, where I planned to be.

Funny though, that’s not my greatest fear. My greatest fear is that millions of people have this fear and might never overcome it.

You see we live in a generation of creative excuse makers. We come up with every excuse in the book. If it’s not in the book we write down a new one and publish the sequel. I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to write down excuses. You can write down your own story, make the script hot and not bland, full of misery. Life should not be insipid, taking actions without consideration for the consequence to the future.

You can’t do anything about yesterday, it’s gone. Neither can you do anything about tomorrow, it’s not here yet. Your life’s story is written today. In the here and in the now, in the moment. I hate my fear. Hate the fact that when I wake up all groggy-eyed in the morning, get a shower and head to the coffee shop. Nearly every person I pass on the street has a good shot at living a mediocre life. Dying with the things the world didn’t have the pleasure of experiencing.

“Only when we are no longer afraid, do we begin to live” – Dorothy Thompson

This quote by Dr Myles Munroe best resonates with what I’m trying to say:

‘’The wealthiest place in the world is not the goldmines of south America or the oil fields of Irak or Iran. They are not the diamond mines south Africa or the banks of the world. The wealthiest place on the planet is just down the road, it is the cemetery. There lie buried companies that were never started, inventions that were never made, bestselling books that were never written, and masterpieces that were never painted. In the cemetery is buried the greatest treasure of untapped potential. ’’

You think death is bad? Try living a life without purpose. Please don’t die, not death in the literal sense. Death in a metaphorical view. Drifting by each day with the same lacklustre demeanour. Life isn’t sucked out in a flash, no not like that. There goes a second, and then another….a minute walks by, those tiny little minutes filled with sixty seconds each transcend into a year and year into years.

The only way to create the life you desire is to treat these little seconds like they’re your last. Get everything out of each and every one. To have an ability is a great thing, to hide it from the world is… is… is just plain evil.


1. The sacrifice you have to make for one unique quality

Contrary to what you might believe, you don’t need to do so many things to have the life you desire. What you have to do is put so many seconds, minutes, hours into one thing, one quality. One idea really can revolutionise your life.

In the realization of dreams, specialization is very important. You can’t(even if you tried) undermine the power of concentration.

Tyler Perry, in a short video clip also placed emphasis on the focus of one:

‘’I had one idea, and that was to do a play, all the other stuff came. My only idea, my only focus was to do my one play and I knew if I could get that to work, everything else would come to pass. There’s so many people who go in different directions, this week they’re doing this, the next week they’re doing that and the next week they’re doing this and the next week they’re gonna be into real estate, the next week they’re gonna open a salon.These kind of people are all over the place and I usually try to get them to focus, focus on one thing, one area. Put all of your energy into watering one area. ’’

The power of focus is truly phenomenal. Attention divided substantially reduces the chances of success. Put so many seconds into one quality that you become the ‘’go-to’’ guy for it. You’ve probably noticed how much emphasis I place on seconds. They’re the seeds that are used to plant trees whose roots grow deep into our history and whose leaves sprout to shed beauty on our story.


2. The danger of accepting a single truth

Don’t! just don’t, believe any generalization made about you, your family, your town, whatever. They might be true, but not for you. True in the sense that it’s what has always been.

You change that, you have to. Steer the course of that sheep into another direction, if that doesn’t work, you jump. Jump! Even at the risk of drowning. My maths lecturer back in college shared with me the story of how he was the first in his family line to complete a college education. You might think ‘’meh, it’s not that special’’.  However, on deeper thought, just think. This meant there were no references to success, no obligation whatsoever to make that accomplishment. He could just as easily have chosen to be like all the others. This leads me to my next point:


3. A discouraging lack of references

Dreams are usually crazy and that’s why most people’s dreams remain just that-a dream. It’s hard to visualize something when no one else in sight has achieved it. Maybe no one else in your family has gone beyond the fences of your hometown. Maybe no one has ever made a million dollars….. So it becomes hard for you to picture these things for yourself. The mere thought of your dreams are overwhelming. Well dreams do come true and that’s why you have to…Create your own references.

No one’s done that before? You be the first… Nobody’s gone there before? Get a car, rip off the rearviews and head there at a speed that’ll have your speed metre rotating all over the place. No one has reached that height? Jack a plane and join the 1% at the top.

When writing your life story, you must get creative and build your own success references. The single truth about the people around your environment must not be applicable to you. Don’t adapt to your environment as a chameleon would, changing at every beckoning. Inspire the colours that shine to the world, your world.

Run away from the 95%, don’t do what they do, don’t use their disempowering words, don’t be as shortsighted as they are and most of all, don’t be afraid to be different. Never accept the single truth, create yours.


4. What can one man do?

When I was much younger, it puzzled me how much was put into the election of ‘’one’’ man during the presidential elections. I didn’t really see how one person could impact such a large country, how naive I was. All it takes is one man, one man can change the world. That’s probably why Marrianne Williamson said  ‘’Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. ’’

What does one man need to make a difference? Hunger! That’s it, the hunger.

If the hunger were a fraction

If that hunger were represented mathematically as a fraction, it’d be something like ‘’1/3’’.Further divided into 0.333333333333333333333333…which goes on to infinity. Not something like ‘’1/5’’ whose decimal burns out like a candle-0.2. It’s finite and has an end. The hunger required can never be finite.

If the hunger were a short phrase

It’d be the phrase a man that gives no excuses uses: ‘’It’s done’’. Competent men use this phrase whenever they’re confronted by a daunting task because they know a solution can and must be found. The competent man looks at you with stone cold conviction. You think he’ll quit but then he goes ‘’it’s done’’ and without saying another word, walks out of your prescence, out to conquer.

When you do your best and that’s still not enough, remember this phrase(it’s done). Beyond your best, there’s something better than your best and that’s ‘’what’s required’’.

If the hunger were a quote

‘’Stay hungry,stay foolish. ’’

It’s true that if your dreams don’t scare you, you need to dream bigger. The world should see you as a fool because of your dreams. Always stay hungry, never lose that urge, that yearning.

Whenever you feel yourself losing your drive, remember this quote by Steve Jobs: ‘’Stay hungry, stay foolish .’’

“Wanting something is not enough, you must hunger for it” – Les Brown


The worst kind of man is ‘’the settler’’. There’s more to life than you’ve had, done, seen, been. The writer of this story is but one person-YOU. No one can give you the blueprint, you have to create yours. Live your life on your own terms.

Forget the good old days, write the new, bold days. Please don’t take books, ideas, inventions, businesses, songs, creations with you to the grave, the world should get the chance to experience the beauty you have.


On a final note, I want you to take some time to seriously ponder this question: What would the world have lost, had I not been born?
Emmanuel Pam is a writer, an entrepreneur, and a business adviser. He tries to motivate and inspire as many people as possible with his writing. You can catch up with him on his motivational blog about business and life: www.youngandtriumphant.com. You can catch up with him on twitter as well: @youngandtriumph


  1. this is awesome..I enjoyed every read..thank you so so much for sharing, I feel you were communicating with me personally I’ve been lazy to do a whole lot of things but this just pushed me and changed my mindset.

  2. Emmanuel,

    This post and tips are going to help me write my next Blog about my story and the tough path I had to take to reach my goals and be where I am today. Being born and living in a third world country for half of my life made me a better man and made me appreciate everything that I have today. As you mention, you have to challenge the “single truth” and go after your dreams even if it seems hard to achieve. Great job.


    Majed Badra

  3. Strive For Greatness .
    Great Post . #2 and #3 really affect a lot of people in a negative way. A lot of people project their own insecurities onto others. That makes them feel as if they cannot reach a certain level of success.

    Getting out of your environment sometimes helps you open your mind to the endless possibilities the world has to offer.

  4. These are some great tips to help anyone take control of their life and create a future they have dreamed of. I once heard a quote that said “the best way to predict the future it to create it.” We can truly create our own futures with the right amount of focus and hunger. You have to go for what you want with tenacity, and the comes from hunger. Great post!

  5. Thanks so much this is what I needed to hear at this very moment..this article is written beatuifully….
    I strongly believe one should not become a partof the 95%…be ddifferent n stand apart

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