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4 Tips To Writing The Story Of Your Own Life

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4 Tips To Writing The Story Of Your Own Life

I have something I want to share with you; a fear. We all have that fear. A fear that by this time next year, I’ll still be here and not there, where I planned to be.

Funny though, that’s not my greatest fear. My greatest fear is that millions of people have this fear and might never overcome it.

You see we live in a generation of creative excuse makers. We come up with every excuse in the book. If it’s not in the book we write down a new one and publish the sequel. I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to write down excuses. You can write down your own story, make the script hot and not bland, full of misery. Life should not be insipid, taking actions without consideration for the consequence to the future.

You can’t do anything about yesterday, it’s gone. Neither can you do anything about tomorrow, it’s not here yet. Your life’s story is written today. In the here and in the now, in the moment. I hate my fear. Hate the fact that when I wake up all groggy-eyed in the morning, get a shower and head to the coffee shop. Nearly every person I pass on the street has a good shot at living a mediocre life. Dying with the things the world didn’t have the pleasure of experiencing.

“Only when we are no longer afraid, do we begin to live” – Dorothy Thompson

This quote by Dr Myles Munroe best resonates with what I’m trying to say:

‘’The wealthiest place in the world is not the goldmines of south America or the oil fields of Irak or Iran. They are not the diamond mines south Africa or the banks of the world. The wealthiest place on the planet is just down the road, it is the cemetery. There lie buried companies that were never started, inventions that were never made, bestselling books that were never written, and masterpieces that were never painted. In the cemetery is buried the greatest treasure of untapped potential. ’’

You think death is bad? Try living a life without purpose. Please don’t die, not death in the literal sense. Death in a metaphorical view. Drifting by each day with the same lacklustre demeanour. Life isn’t sucked out in a flash, no not like that. There goes a second, and then another….a minute walks by, those tiny little minutes filled with sixty seconds each transcend into a year and year into years.

The only way to create the life you desire is to treat these little seconds like they’re your last. Get everything out of each and every one. To have an ability is a great thing, to hide it from the world is… is… is just plain evil.

 

1. The sacrifice you have to make for one unique quality

Contrary to what you might believe, you don’t need to do so many things to have the life you desire. What you have to do is put so many seconds, minutes, hours into one thing, one quality. One idea really can revolutionise your life.

In the realization of dreams, specialization is very important. You can’t(even if you tried) undermine the power of concentration.

Tyler Perry, in a short video clip also placed emphasis on the focus of one:

‘’I had one idea, and that was to do a play, all the other stuff came. My only idea, my only focus was to do my one play and I knew if I could get that to work, everything else would come to pass. There’s so many people who go in different directions, this week they’re doing this, the next week they’re doing that and the next week they’re doing this and the next week they’re gonna be into real estate, the next week they’re gonna open a salon.These kind of people are all over the place and I usually try to get them to focus, focus on one thing, one area. Put all of your energy into watering one area. ’’

The power of focus is truly phenomenal. Attention divided substantially reduces the chances of success. Put so many seconds into one quality that you become the ‘’go-to’’ guy for it. You’ve probably noticed how much emphasis I place on seconds. They’re the seeds that are used to plant trees whose roots grow deep into our history and whose leaves sprout to shed beauty on our story.

 

2. The danger of accepting a single truth

Don’t! just don’t, believe any generalization made about you, your family, your town, whatever. They might be true, but not for you. True in the sense that it’s what has always been.

You change that, you have to. Steer the course of that sheep into another direction, if that doesn’t work, you jump. Jump! Even at the risk of drowning. My maths lecturer back in college shared with me the story of how he was the first in his family line to complete a college education. You might think ‘’meh, it’s not that special’’.  However, on deeper thought, just think. This meant there were no references to success, no obligation whatsoever to make that accomplishment. He could just as easily have chosen to be like all the others. This leads me to my next point:

Opinion

3. A discouraging lack of references

Dreams are usually crazy and that’s why most people’s dreams remain just that-a dream. It’s hard to visualize something when no one else in sight has achieved it. Maybe no one else in your family has gone beyond the fences of your hometown. Maybe no one has ever made a million dollars….. So it becomes hard for you to picture these things for yourself. The mere thought of your dreams are overwhelming. Well dreams do come true and that’s why you have to…Create your own references.

No one’s done that before? You be the first… Nobody’s gone there before? Get a car, rip off the rearviews and head there at a speed that’ll have your speed metre rotating all over the place. No one has reached that height? Jack a plane and join the 1% at the top.

When writing your life story, you must get creative and build your own success references. The single truth about the people around your environment must not be applicable to you. Don’t adapt to your environment as a chameleon would, changing at every beckoning. Inspire the colours that shine to the world, your world.

Run away from the 95%, don’t do what they do, don’t use their disempowering words, don’t be as shortsighted as they are and most of all, don’t be afraid to be different. Never accept the single truth, create yours.

 

4. What can one man do?

When I was much younger, it puzzled me how much was put into the election of ‘’one’’ man during the presidential elections. I didn’t really see how one person could impact such a large country, how naive I was. All it takes is one man, one man can change the world. That’s probably why Marrianne Williamson said  ‘’Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. ’’

What does one man need to make a difference? Hunger! That’s it, the hunger.

If the hunger were a fraction

If that hunger were represented mathematically as a fraction, it’d be something like ‘’1/3’’.Further divided into 0.333333333333333333333333…which goes on to infinity. Not something like ‘’1/5’’ whose decimal burns out like a candle-0.2. It’s finite and has an end. The hunger required can never be finite.

If the hunger were a short phrase

It’d be the phrase a man that gives no excuses uses: ‘’It’s done’’. Competent men use this phrase whenever they’re confronted by a daunting task because they know a solution can and must be found. The competent man looks at you with stone cold conviction. You think he’ll quit but then he goes ‘’it’s done’’ and without saying another word, walks out of your prescence, out to conquer.

When you do your best and that’s still not enough, remember this phrase(it’s done). Beyond your best, there’s something better than your best and that’s ‘’what’s required’’.

If the hunger were a quote

‘’Stay hungry,stay foolish. ’’

It’s true that if your dreams don’t scare you, you need to dream bigger. The world should see you as a fool because of your dreams. Always stay hungry, never lose that urge, that yearning.

Whenever you feel yourself losing your drive, remember this quote by Steve Jobs: ‘’Stay hungry, stay foolish .’’

“Wanting something is not enough, you must hunger for it” – Les Brown

Conclusion

The worst kind of man is ‘’the settler’’. There’s more to life than you’ve had, done, seen, been. The writer of this story is but one person-YOU. No one can give you the blueprint, you have to create yours. Live your life on your own terms.

Forget the good old days, write the new, bold days. Please don’t take books, ideas, inventions, businesses, songs, creations with you to the grave, the world should get the chance to experience the beauty you have.

 

On a final note, I want you to take some time to seriously ponder this question: What would the world have lost, had I not been born?

Emmanuel Pam is a writer, an entrepreneur, and a business adviser. He tries to motivate and inspire as many people as possible with his writing. You can catch up with him on his motivational blog about business and life: www.youngandtriumphant.com. You can catch up with him on twitter as well: @youngandtriumph

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8 Comments

8 Comments

  1. princess

    May 4, 2016 at 8:05 am

    this is awesome..I enjoyed every read..thank you so so much for sharing, I feel you were communicating with me personally I’ve been lazy to do a whole lot of things but this just pushed me and changed my mindset.
    thanks

  2. TAnrose

    Jul 21, 2015 at 2:44 pm

    Truelly motivated me. Thanks. God continue to bless your pen.

    • Emmanuel

      Jan 13, 2016 at 8:58 pm

      Glad it did. Bless you too.

  3. Majed Badra

    Jul 12, 2015 at 3:21 am

    Emmanuel,

    This post and tips are going to help me write my next Blog about my story and the tough path I had to take to reach my goals and be where I am today. Being born and living in a third world country for half of my life made me a better man and made me appreciate everything that I have today. As you mention, you have to challenge the “single truth” and go after your dreams even if it seems hard to achieve. Great job.

    Thanks,

    Majed Badra

  4. Addicted 2 The Grind

    Jul 4, 2015 at 10:15 pm

    Strive For Greatness .
    Great Post . #2 and #3 really affect a lot of people in a negative way. A lot of people project their own insecurities onto others. That makes them feel as if they cannot reach a certain level of success.

    Getting out of your environment sometimes helps you open your mind to the endless possibilities the world has to offer.

  5. Lawrence Berry

    Jul 4, 2015 at 7:17 pm

    These are some great tips to help anyone take control of their life and create a future they have dreamed of. I once heard a quote that said “the best way to predict the future it to create it.” We can truly create our own futures with the right amount of focus and hunger. You have to go for what you want with tenacity, and the comes from hunger. Great post!

  6. Sugandha Agarwal

    Jul 4, 2015 at 6:02 pm

    These points are really going to help me when I will write my story. Thanks for writing such an awesome post which is really unique and helpful!
    Cheers
    Sugandha!

  7. shabnam

    Jul 4, 2015 at 3:21 pm

    Thanks so much this is what I needed to hear at this very moment..this article is written beatuifully….
    I strongly believe one should not become a partof the 95%…be ddifferent n stand apart

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Life

10 Questions You Must Ask Yourself to Discover Your True Self

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A comprehensive guide to self-discovery; this is what one must ask themselves. There is nothing purer than the path to discovering the true meaning of one’s life, the purpose of existence and the acknowledgment and connection that can be forged from within with oneself.

Through self-discovery, a person is closer to realizing their true dreams and passions than they realize and comprehending the value that each of these goals holds to them.

The following are a set of 10 questions that everyone must ask themselves in order to discover their true self.

1. What about myself do I like most?

Perhaps the most important goal in one’s life must be to achieve inner peace and this is not possible without accepting yourself for who you are. Hence why the first question must be, ‘What about yourself do you like and appreciate the most?’ By preparing a list of things you like about yourself, self-acceptance is built.

2. What aspects of my life do I wish to see a change in?

Just as important as knowing the positive things, equally necessary is to ask oneself, ‘What aspects of my life do I wish to see a change in, with regards to myself?’ This helps to improve the quality of you as a person by working on your negative aspects.

3. What are my fears?

Confronting one’s fears is a big milestone, conquering of the fears and insecurities is only possible when you recognize what these fears are- hence the next thing you should be asking yourself is, ‘What are your fears? What holds you back?’

“Fear is only as deep as the mind allows” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

4. What am I grateful for?

Gratitude is one of the most important virtues of a person. In order to understand and appreciate all the things that hold value and render you thankful for, you must ask yourself, ‘So far in my life, what are all the good things and who are all the people in my life I should be thankful for?’ This lets you access all the people who mean the most to you but most importantly who has been there for you in times of despair.

5. Am I happy doing what I’m currently doing?

Another life-changing question everyone must ask themselves periodically is whether they are actually happy doing what they are currently doing. Is it really what you wanted to be doing or are you just following instructions of those who have dictated to you that this is how life should be? If the answer is no, then you must ask yourselves what can be done to change this.

6. What are the most important things I’ve learned in life?

Another question that proves very helpful when addressed regularly is the one that asks, ‘So far in life what are the most important things that you have learned? Which of the lessons have been life-changing and what changes have you brought about- positive and negative to your life based on these lessons?

7. Who inspires me the most and what is it that inspires me about them?

Very insightful questions to ask yourself is, “Who is the person who inspires you the most and what is it about this person that inspires you? “-  This will give you an important outlook on what exactly is it that you are working towards and what necessary personal changes must you make in accordance with achieving these goals.

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell

8. How important is money to me?

‘How important is money to me?’ This is a very important question as it determines not only your goals in life but also helps you discover what exactly your priorities are and whether or not you are assigning your time and resources towards what is most important to you. In case the answer is that money is not a priority, then it leads you to the question of what exactly is your current priority and what should you be doing for this.

9. Where do I see myself in 5, 10 and 20 years?

“Where do I see myself in 5, 10 and 20 years from today?’ Only when you recognize and accept your goals in a realistic and achievable manner keeping in mind your duties and responsibilities towards your family, can you work towards your goals as per your maximum potential and dedicate yourself towards realizing all of them in the order that you want to.

10. What do I believe in?

‘Do I believe in the idea of God? What does God represent in my life? Identifying with a religion irrespective of what you are born into highlights your moral principles in life and reflects what exactly you believe to be good and to be wrong. A person who believes in God is seeking security and a modem of self-reassurance as well as a conscience upon which they can build a set of values and virtues abide by for a life with the least regrets. The belief in God shows that such persons need the responsibility of being answerable to someone who checks out their actions.

Asking yourself the above-mentioned questions shall act as a guide in your path of self-discovery and realizing your goals and passions before time runs out. It also helps you to prioritize who and what means the most to you and whether you are dividing your attention correctly respective of the priority you have assigned.

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

How To Make The Next Big Decision In Your Life.

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At regular intervals in your life, you have to make that challenging next big decision.

Life goes along just fine until one day you instinctively know that you have to make a giant change. This change comes about because we need to keep growing. Otherwise we die inside.

Making that next big decision has been something I’ve had to become an expert in over the last 12 months. I had to make the following big decisions:

– Am I always going to be a salesperson or can I go back to being a leader again?
– Is it possible to overcome my fear of public speaking so I can inspire people?
– Is traveling the world something I’m always going to be stopped from doing?
– Where is my love life going? Will I always be single or with someone who’s not right?

These have been very tough decisions to make.

I’ve had some epic failures trying to answer these questions. Here are some examples:

– I tried becoming more technical in my career. I hated it. I only enjoy high-level technical info.
– I gave a few speeches and sucked big time. My face was as red as a tomato.
– I went on a few overseas trips and fear nearly got the best of me.
– I made a bold move to go on lots of dates and find a girl that was right for me. Most of my attempts failed – except one.

Right now, the reason I’m writing this blog post is because I need to change my career. I’ve stopped learning. I’m starting to think I know everything in my field of expertise. I’ve become comfortable. I’m experiencing frustration because I’m surrounded by the wrong people.

These are all warning signs that it’s time to make the next big decision in your life.

 

Making the next big decision is playing on the offense.

Playing on the offense means that you are being proactive. It means you are skating to where the puck in Ice Hockey is going, not where it is right at this point in time.

The moment you start playing defense and protecting your position, you stop growing.

“Standing still is like being in the middle of a battlefield with no gun and no ammo and hoping not to get shot”

To stay on the offense, you have to recognize the signs I mentioned above and then make that big decision. When you’re forced to make that next big decision, that’s when you’re screwed. Being forced to make the decision means that you no longer have time on your side.

You end up settling for second best because you are in a hurry to make that big decision and you can’t proactively figure out what’s right for you. You don’t get the chance to speak with your network or your mentors and sense check what your next move is going to be.

 

Become comfortable with not having all the answers.

Making the next big decision will require you to be okay with not having all the answers. While you can do your research and speak to people who you trust about the decision, you won’t know the outcome until you try.

Maybe you’ll hate your next career move.
Maybe starting a business is the worst idea for you.
Maybe marrying that person will end in divorce.

It’s impossible to know the answers beforehand so you have to understand that things could go your way or they could end in disaster. This is a positive.

“You either get what you want, or you get to learn one of those life lessons that will help you become more self-aware and make you more resilient”

 

Not making that big decision is far worse.

You’ll know when you’ve reached the crossroad. Deep down you’ll know when it’s time to make that next gigantic step. Ignoring the signs is far worse than making that big decision and then having it all blow up in your face.

Failing to make that big decision ends up in regret.

“Regret slowly eats away at your confidence and your ability to be courageous”

Your head becomes full of white noise that drowns out the good ideas and clear thinking that will make you successful.

Go and meet people who are seventy years of age and older at a retirement village. Listen to their regrets and the decisions they wish they made. This will give you perspective. Continually dreaming about where that next big decision could lead is a waste of your energy.

Try something new for three months and then if it doesn’t work out it’s cool. There are thousands of opportunities and there is no one thing, no one person, no one idea, no one business that will give you everything you want.

 

Prepare and execute.

Big decisions creep up on you like a snake ready to bite you in the ass for disrupting its sunbaking session with your loud ass walking. If you don’t prepare, then you’ll get taken by surprise. Get good at writing lists on your phone.

Be prepared for the possible outcomes of your big decision and work out if there are more positives than negatives.

Once you are prepared, face into the decision and execute. Take the island and burn the boats behind you. Rip up your Plan B and execute like your life depends on it (well it does actually).

 

Be prepared to be blindsided.

That’s right. Surprises are going to happen. You can plan and still have the whole decision blow up in your face. Be prepared for stuff to come out of nowhere and risk everything you’ve put on the line.

I’m about to make my next career move and there are going to be things I can’t see. People are always going to tell you that working with them in their business is going to be amazing. They sell you the dream work-life balance, how great the people are, how you’re going to change the world.

It’s near impossible to know if they’re full of the brown stuff, but that’s okay. Trust your gut. If it all falls apart, then you get to make the next big decision far quicker than you expected.

In my case, I’ve had so many big decisions go wrong that I’ve become an expert in making big decisions and preparing for the myriad of outcomes that could transpire.

 

When would now be a good time?

That’s what I tell myself when I’m faced with a big decision. The best time to decide is right now. It will never be the right time. You’ll never have enough knowledge, you’ll never be perfect, you’ll never be ready, the economy will never be right.

So if there’s never a good time, then the best time has to be now. You can’t predict the future so you may as well focus on right now and take the wild bull that is your life by the horns.

Act with courage and now will always be a good time. Keep jumping at pretend shadows and you’ll never make a decision.

 

Failing to make decisions is what’s stopping you from moving forward.

If you feel you’re not where you want to be or you’re unhappy with any part of your life, it’s because you haven’t made the big decisions.

You’re fat? Change your diet and go to the gym.
You’re broke? Learn to control your spending.
You’re unhappy? Decide to stop focusing on yourself and focus on others.
You’re poor? Go on the Internet and find ways to make extra money.

There’s always an answer to your problems. The answer is always to make the next big decision with courage. The answer is always to believe in yourself. Everything will work out for the best. Trust me.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Life

5 Ways to Tap Into Your Intuitive Wisdom as You Design a Successful Life

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Success, true success, can only be experienced when you are living life based on your particular design. The best way to know and design a life based on this is to be in constant connection with the wisdom present within you. Wisdom that goes beyond yourself and that, very possibly, put you together originally. People call it different names and intuition is a great way to describe it.

As a spiritual person, you know the power of the intuition. Being able to live from a place of wisdom beyond yourself allows you to find solutions that surprise and delight. These solutions also give you a sense of quiet power as well as you know you are never alone and always completely guided.

For me, intuition changed my life. It took me from working my pharmacist job with no hope for a respite to being a business owner and spiritual teacher living a purpose-driven life.

Here are 5 ideas for you to support your journey to living a more intuitive life:

1. Daily Practice

There can sometime be the assumption that unless something comes to one naturally, then it is not theirs to develop. That is nonsense. Most, if not all, good habits have to be developed. A consistent practice is needed, if you are to experience the benefits of a new skill.

Success is a habit. Each morning, I wake up earlier than my household (Usually 4am) and I sit in silence. I connect with source. I seek guidance for the day ahead. This is a habit I’ve developed.

Each day, the things you make time for are designing or destroying your life. Could you find an extra 20 minutes each day to practice quieting yourself down and connecting with the wisdom within you? Be consistent with the timing each day for long enough to build a habit. Some say 21 days, others say 40 days. For this habit, I would suggest that you make a decision to do it daily and at some point, it becomes a normal and natural part of your life whatever else is going on.

“At any moment, the decision you make can change the course of your life for the better.” – Tony Robbins

2. Quiet Yourself

We live in a very busy world – There is always something happening around you. Always some stimulation to distract you. You have to consciously choose to create space to be quiet. As mentioned earlier, you want to take 20 minutes or so a day to develop a practice and in that time, learn to still your thinking as much as possible, learn to tune into flow.

I use breathing and sometimes, candles to do this. I sit in silence staring at a candle and allowing intuitive flashes to come through or I simply pay attention to my breathing until I feel a stillness come over me. Any errant thoughts that try desperately to get my attention, are written in my journal with the intention of dealing with them later. This calms me down as the thoughts feel as though they are being acknowledged.

3. Suspend Judgement & Disbelief

As you begin working your intuition muscle, you will wonder if you are just talking to yourself or if you are making things up. In the session, refuse to humour that thinking. Instead, make a note of what you are feeling, seeing and hearing. You can have an intuition buddy and you can run things by them after the session to see what they intuitively feel but while you are choosing to tap into source within, suspend all judgement and allow what comes through to come through. It is a very tentative thing to sense your intuition and if you keep rejecting what tries to come through you, the flow will feel stuck.

“Failure is not a single cataclysmic event. You don’t fail overnight. Instead, failure is a few errors in judgement repeated every day.” – Jim Rohn

4. Come with Intent

This is something I teach clients because having a question you are seeking an answer to, can help with the calming of the mind. Sometimes, the intention is simply to develop my relationship with the source and so my intent is to listen. I generally then start with ‘Please speak to me’. Other times, there is something I specifically want to know the answer to and so I lead with that question. Having an intention keeps you focused.

5. No Desperation

Unfortunately, if you are too desperate about getting a specific answer, you will find it hard to still your mind. It is best to be in an open and receptive mood. How can you do that when you are actually desperate for an answer?  

Something I would do then, is to let calmness be my intention. I would seek guidance on how to still myself and reduce the feeling of desperation which also then has the effect of allowing me to think more clearly anyway. The other thing I do is write out my vision and goals first and keep my mind on those. If you focus on the need, you remain in the need and you remain reactive to the need. If you focus on the vision and the goal, then you become creator which is your true nature anyway.

Which of these 5 things will you implement today?

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

4 Essentials to Keep You From Staying Satisfied in Life

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It may sound morally objectionable to not want to stay satisfied in life; however, truth be told, it is actually unethical and morally wrong to not pursue what you really want in life and realize your maximum potential.

The people around us in life, whether it’s family, friends, business associates, people under our leadership, or people in our communities, look at our lives and are impacted. They see how we live out our dreams, and how we overcome the obstacles of life and business. This inspires them to do more, better, or different in their own lives. The reality is, many people’s inspiration and reason to excel is resting on us.

With this great responsibility on our shoulders, that is the first reason we must always strive for more and never be satisfied: someone’s success is depending on your success.

In the tough times or even the times we have reaped the harvest of our hard work, always know we must keep going. Yes, savor the victory, but know that this is not the end. We must keep going. If you don’t do it for you at least think of the people that are watching you and observing your life and do it for them.

Here are some practical tips on how to be continually motivated and not easily satisfied with our successes:

1. Frequently Self-Reflect

Socrates famously stated that an unexamined life is not worth living. We should ask ourselves if THIS (certain point in our lives) is our best that we have to offer. If we are being honest with ourselves, we will truthfully answer, NO. Nonetheless, we must not beat ourselves up nor constantly criticize ourselves but always remind ourselves that there is always room for growth.

Life is all about growth and development, and the goal of all development is to realize our true potential. All organisms grow and when they stop growing, you can be pretty sure that their stage for destruction has set in. Humans are probably the only creatures that do not stop growing. While we have stopped growing physically, our other aspects such as psychology, social standing, ambitions and other areas do not stop growing at all.

“The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.” – Wayne Dyer

2. Explore The World

You’ve probably heard of people who’ve stayed their entire lives in their birthplace. These types of people sometimes cannot believe the stories they hear from others that have travelled or lived in various places.

To truly see other people and parts of the world, other than where you come from is a must. Not only does it allow one to appreciate what you do have, but it challenges you to want to do more with your life and not settle. Some of the biggest moments of growth for many people happen when they attend missionary trips, participate in community service, business conferences, and even vacationing in other cities or even countries.

This occurs because your everyday existence and routine of life is challenged. You meet other people who may not be where you are in life or are doing exceptionally more than you. Either way, the first can remind you to always be hungry, and the other can remind you that you are not there yet and there is still more to success and growth; we still have room to grow.

So, travel, meet new people, and stretch your understanding of what life looks like and  what is attainable.

3. Be Curious

Most have heard the old saying when you were young, that “curiosity killed the cat.” Take that saying as a caution not a rule. We should be like children in the level of our curiosity. Curious children ask a lot of questions, and sometimes some of these questions even surprise adults. Because of their powerful curiosity, children think differently compared to adults and therein lies the power of having curiosity as a child.

Some very smart children are not satisfied with some answers adults give them at times, because they intuitively know that either the adult didn’t know the answer or they didn’t understand the topic at all. Don’t be satisfied, and always be eternally curious. Research topics that you know little to nothing about, and be open-minded to topics you are familiar with.

4. Be A Perfectionist

Don’t be satisfied with the present way of doing things. Progress would not happen if we did not tinker with doing things better. Consider textile weaving. People of long ago made textile for clothes using traditional weaving. If we had been satisfied with this way of making textile, we would not have discovered modern technologies of spinning and weaving to produce textiles to clothe billions of people across the world.

So never adopt a mindset that anything is ever perfect with no room for improvement. Systems and processes can always be improved.  

It is hard to work with a perfectionist, but without the perfectionist, we would not have the comfort of modern life. Machines are designed for perfection. An imperfect machine would not work, and even if it could be made to work, it would be hazardous to operate. Perfectionists are not satisfied with mediocre output. They always want the best.

“Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.” – Michael Jordan

A study published in the “Journal of Personality” entitled “On the Development of Perfectionism: The Longitudinal Role of Academic Achievement and Academic Efficacy,” by Lavinia E. Damian and colleagues showed that academic achievement predicted relative increases in both perfectionistic strivings and perfectionistic concerns. This is an important development because it suggests that as people become better and better, their level of perfectionistic pursuit also increases.

Never succumb to the mindset of people who achieve some level of success and say “I have arrived” and “I have made it.” For when we accept this, we have placed a ceiling over our potential and a limit on the truly limitless opportunities that await us. Always strive to be, do, achieve, reach, see, and grow more.

How are you making sure you continue to grow daily in order to be great? Share with us some tips in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

10 Questions You Must Ask Yourself to Discover Your True Self

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A comprehensive guide to self-discovery; this is what one must ask themselves. There is nothing purer than the path to discovering the true meaning of one’s life, the purpose of existence and the acknowledgment and connection that can be forged from within with oneself. (more…)

Kurtis Brase is a professional journalist. Now, she works at EssayPro as a writer and editor.

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8 Comments

8 Comments

  1. princess

    May 4, 2016 at 8:05 am

    this is awesome..I enjoyed every read..thank you so so much for sharing, I feel you were communicating with me personally I’ve been lazy to do a whole lot of things but this just pushed me and changed my mindset.
    thanks

  2. TAnrose

    Jul 21, 2015 at 2:44 pm

    Truelly motivated me. Thanks. God continue to bless your pen.

    • Emmanuel

      Jan 13, 2016 at 8:58 pm

      Glad it did. Bless you too.

  3. Majed Badra

    Jul 12, 2015 at 3:21 am

    Emmanuel,

    This post and tips are going to help me write my next Blog about my story and the tough path I had to take to reach my goals and be where I am today. Being born and living in a third world country for half of my life made me a better man and made me appreciate everything that I have today. As you mention, you have to challenge the “single truth” and go after your dreams even if it seems hard to achieve. Great job.

    Thanks,

    Majed Badra

  4. Addicted 2 The Grind

    Jul 4, 2015 at 10:15 pm

    Strive For Greatness .
    Great Post . #2 and #3 really affect a lot of people in a negative way. A lot of people project their own insecurities onto others. That makes them feel as if they cannot reach a certain level of success.

    Getting out of your environment sometimes helps you open your mind to the endless possibilities the world has to offer.

  5. Lawrence Berry

    Jul 4, 2015 at 7:17 pm

    These are some great tips to help anyone take control of their life and create a future they have dreamed of. I once heard a quote that said “the best way to predict the future it to create it.” We can truly create our own futures with the right amount of focus and hunger. You have to go for what you want with tenacity, and the comes from hunger. Great post!

  6. Sugandha Agarwal

    Jul 4, 2015 at 6:02 pm

    These points are really going to help me when I will write my story. Thanks for writing such an awesome post which is really unique and helpful!
    Cheers
    Sugandha!

  7. shabnam

    Jul 4, 2015 at 3:21 pm

    Thanks so much this is what I needed to hear at this very moment..this article is written beatuifully….
    I strongly believe one should not become a partof the 95%…be ddifferent n stand apart

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Life

10 Questions You Must Ask Yourself to Discover Your True Self

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self discovery

A comprehensive guide to self-discovery; this is what one must ask themselves. There is nothing purer than the path to discovering the true meaning of one’s life, the purpose of existence and the acknowledgment and connection that can be forged from within with oneself.

Through self-discovery, a person is closer to realizing their true dreams and passions than they realize and comprehending the value that each of these goals holds to them.

The following are a set of 10 questions that everyone must ask themselves in order to discover their true self.

1. What about myself do I like most?

Perhaps the most important goal in one’s life must be to achieve inner peace and this is not possible without accepting yourself for who you are. Hence why the first question must be, ‘What about yourself do you like and appreciate the most?’ By preparing a list of things you like about yourself, self-acceptance is built.

2. What aspects of my life do I wish to see a change in?

Just as important as knowing the positive things, equally necessary is to ask oneself, ‘What aspects of my life do I wish to see a change in, with regards to myself?’ This helps to improve the quality of you as a person by working on your negative aspects.

3. What are my fears?

Confronting one’s fears is a big milestone, conquering of the fears and insecurities is only possible when you recognize what these fears are- hence the next thing you should be asking yourself is, ‘What are your fears? What holds you back?’

“Fear is only as deep as the mind allows” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

4. What am I grateful for?

Gratitude is one of the most important virtues of a person. In order to understand and appreciate all the things that hold value and render you thankful for, you must ask yourself, ‘So far in my life, what are all the good things and who are all the people in my life I should be thankful for?’ This lets you access all the people who mean the most to you but most importantly who has been there for you in times of despair.

5. Am I happy doing what I’m currently doing?

Another life-changing question everyone must ask themselves periodically is whether they are actually happy doing what they are currently doing. Is it really what you wanted to be doing or are you just following instructions of those who have dictated to you that this is how life should be? If the answer is no, then you must ask yourselves what can be done to change this.

6. What are the most important things I’ve learned in life?

Another question that proves very helpful when addressed regularly is the one that asks, ‘So far in life what are the most important things that you have learned? Which of the lessons have been life-changing and what changes have you brought about- positive and negative to your life based on these lessons?

7. Who inspires me the most and what is it that inspires me about them?

Very insightful questions to ask yourself is, “Who is the person who inspires you the most and what is it about this person that inspires you? “-  This will give you an important outlook on what exactly is it that you are working towards and what necessary personal changes must you make in accordance with achieving these goals.

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell

8. How important is money to me?

‘How important is money to me?’ This is a very important question as it determines not only your goals in life but also helps you discover what exactly your priorities are and whether or not you are assigning your time and resources towards what is most important to you. In case the answer is that money is not a priority, then it leads you to the question of what exactly is your current priority and what should you be doing for this.

9. Where do I see myself in 5, 10 and 20 years?

“Where do I see myself in 5, 10 and 20 years from today?’ Only when you recognize and accept your goals in a realistic and achievable manner keeping in mind your duties and responsibilities towards your family, can you work towards your goals as per your maximum potential and dedicate yourself towards realizing all of them in the order that you want to.

10. What do I believe in?

‘Do I believe in the idea of God? What does God represent in my life? Identifying with a religion irrespective of what you are born into highlights your moral principles in life and reflects what exactly you believe to be good and to be wrong. A person who believes in God is seeking security and a modem of self-reassurance as well as a conscience upon which they can build a set of values and virtues abide by for a life with the least regrets. The belief in God shows that such persons need the responsibility of being answerable to someone who checks out their actions.

Asking yourself the above-mentioned questions shall act as a guide in your path of self-discovery and realizing your goals and passions before time runs out. It also helps you to prioritize who and what means the most to you and whether you are dividing your attention correctly respective of the priority you have assigned.

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Life

How To Make The Next Big Decision In Your Life.

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At regular intervals in your life, you have to make that challenging next big decision.

Life goes along just fine until one day you instinctively know that you have to make a giant change. This change comes about because we need to keep growing. Otherwise we die inside.

Making that next big decision has been something I’ve had to become an expert in over the last 12 months. I had to make the following big decisions:

– Am I always going to be a salesperson or can I go back to being a leader again?
– Is it possible to overcome my fear of public speaking so I can inspire people?
– Is traveling the world something I’m always going to be stopped from doing?
– Where is my love life going? Will I always be single or with someone who’s not right?

These have been very tough decisions to make.

I’ve had some epic failures trying to answer these questions. Here are some examples:

– I tried becoming more technical in my career. I hated it. I only enjoy high-level technical info.
– I gave a few speeches and sucked big time. My face was as red as a tomato.
– I went on a few overseas trips and fear nearly got the best of me.
– I made a bold move to go on lots of dates and find a girl that was right for me. Most of my attempts failed – except one.

Right now, the reason I’m writing this blog post is because I need to change my career. I’ve stopped learning. I’m starting to think I know everything in my field of expertise. I’ve become comfortable. I’m experiencing frustration because I’m surrounded by the wrong people.

These are all warning signs that it’s time to make the next big decision in your life.

 

Making the next big decision is playing on the offense.

Playing on the offense means that you are being proactive. It means you are skating to where the puck in Ice Hockey is going, not where it is right at this point in time.

The moment you start playing defense and protecting your position, you stop growing.

“Standing still is like being in the middle of a battlefield with no gun and no ammo and hoping not to get shot”

To stay on the offense, you have to recognize the signs I mentioned above and then make that big decision. When you’re forced to make that next big decision, that’s when you’re screwed. Being forced to make the decision means that you no longer have time on your side.

You end up settling for second best because you are in a hurry to make that big decision and you can’t proactively figure out what’s right for you. You don’t get the chance to speak with your network or your mentors and sense check what your next move is going to be.

 

Become comfortable with not having all the answers.

Making the next big decision will require you to be okay with not having all the answers. While you can do your research and speak to people who you trust about the decision, you won’t know the outcome until you try.

Maybe you’ll hate your next career move.
Maybe starting a business is the worst idea for you.
Maybe marrying that person will end in divorce.

It’s impossible to know the answers beforehand so you have to understand that things could go your way or they could end in disaster. This is a positive.

“You either get what you want, or you get to learn one of those life lessons that will help you become more self-aware and make you more resilient”

 

Not making that big decision is far worse.

You’ll know when you’ve reached the crossroad. Deep down you’ll know when it’s time to make that next gigantic step. Ignoring the signs is far worse than making that big decision and then having it all blow up in your face.

Failing to make that big decision ends up in regret.

“Regret slowly eats away at your confidence and your ability to be courageous”

Your head becomes full of white noise that drowns out the good ideas and clear thinking that will make you successful.

Go and meet people who are seventy years of age and older at a retirement village. Listen to their regrets and the decisions they wish they made. This will give you perspective. Continually dreaming about where that next big decision could lead is a waste of your energy.

Try something new for three months and then if it doesn’t work out it’s cool. There are thousands of opportunities and there is no one thing, no one person, no one idea, no one business that will give you everything you want.

 

Prepare and execute.

Big decisions creep up on you like a snake ready to bite you in the ass for disrupting its sunbaking session with your loud ass walking. If you don’t prepare, then you’ll get taken by surprise. Get good at writing lists on your phone.

Be prepared for the possible outcomes of your big decision and work out if there are more positives than negatives.

Once you are prepared, face into the decision and execute. Take the island and burn the boats behind you. Rip up your Plan B and execute like your life depends on it (well it does actually).

 

Be prepared to be blindsided.

That’s right. Surprises are going to happen. You can plan and still have the whole decision blow up in your face. Be prepared for stuff to come out of nowhere and risk everything you’ve put on the line.

I’m about to make my next career move and there are going to be things I can’t see. People are always going to tell you that working with them in their business is going to be amazing. They sell you the dream work-life balance, how great the people are, how you’re going to change the world.

It’s near impossible to know if they’re full of the brown stuff, but that’s okay. Trust your gut. If it all falls apart, then you get to make the next big decision far quicker than you expected.

In my case, I’ve had so many big decisions go wrong that I’ve become an expert in making big decisions and preparing for the myriad of outcomes that could transpire.

 

When would now be a good time?

That’s what I tell myself when I’m faced with a big decision. The best time to decide is right now. It will never be the right time. You’ll never have enough knowledge, you’ll never be perfect, you’ll never be ready, the economy will never be right.

So if there’s never a good time, then the best time has to be now. You can’t predict the future so you may as well focus on right now and take the wild bull that is your life by the horns.

Act with courage and now will always be a good time. Keep jumping at pretend shadows and you’ll never make a decision.

 

Failing to make decisions is what’s stopping you from moving forward.

If you feel you’re not where you want to be or you’re unhappy with any part of your life, it’s because you haven’t made the big decisions.

You’re fat? Change your diet and go to the gym.
You’re broke? Learn to control your spending.
You’re unhappy? Decide to stop focusing on yourself and focus on others.
You’re poor? Go on the Internet and find ways to make extra money.

There’s always an answer to your problems. The answer is always to make the next big decision with courage. The answer is always to believe in yourself. Everything will work out for the best. Trust me.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Life

5 Ways to Tap Into Your Intuitive Wisdom as You Design a Successful Life

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Success, true success, can only be experienced when you are living life based on your particular design. The best way to know and design a life based on this is to be in constant connection with the wisdom present within you. Wisdom that goes beyond yourself and that, very possibly, put you together originally. People call it different names and intuition is a great way to describe it.

As a spiritual person, you know the power of the intuition. Being able to live from a place of wisdom beyond yourself allows you to find solutions that surprise and delight. These solutions also give you a sense of quiet power as well as you know you are never alone and always completely guided.

For me, intuition changed my life. It took me from working my pharmacist job with no hope for a respite to being a business owner and spiritual teacher living a purpose-driven life.

Here are 5 ideas for you to support your journey to living a more intuitive life:

1. Daily Practice

There can sometime be the assumption that unless something comes to one naturally, then it is not theirs to develop. That is nonsense. Most, if not all, good habits have to be developed. A consistent practice is needed, if you are to experience the benefits of a new skill.

Success is a habit. Each morning, I wake up earlier than my household (Usually 4am) and I sit in silence. I connect with source. I seek guidance for the day ahead. This is a habit I’ve developed.

Each day, the things you make time for are designing or destroying your life. Could you find an extra 20 minutes each day to practice quieting yourself down and connecting with the wisdom within you? Be consistent with the timing each day for long enough to build a habit. Some say 21 days, others say 40 days. For this habit, I would suggest that you make a decision to do it daily and at some point, it becomes a normal and natural part of your life whatever else is going on.

“At any moment, the decision you make can change the course of your life for the better.” – Tony Robbins

2. Quiet Yourself

We live in a very busy world – There is always something happening around you. Always some stimulation to distract you. You have to consciously choose to create space to be quiet. As mentioned earlier, you want to take 20 minutes or so a day to develop a practice and in that time, learn to still your thinking as much as possible, learn to tune into flow.

I use breathing and sometimes, candles to do this. I sit in silence staring at a candle and allowing intuitive flashes to come through or I simply pay attention to my breathing until I feel a stillness come over me. Any errant thoughts that try desperately to get my attention, are written in my journal with the intention of dealing with them later. This calms me down as the thoughts feel as though they are being acknowledged.

3. Suspend Judgement & Disbelief

As you begin working your intuition muscle, you will wonder if you are just talking to yourself or if you are making things up. In the session, refuse to humour that thinking. Instead, make a note of what you are feeling, seeing and hearing. You can have an intuition buddy and you can run things by them after the session to see what they intuitively feel but while you are choosing to tap into source within, suspend all judgement and allow what comes through to come through. It is a very tentative thing to sense your intuition and if you keep rejecting what tries to come through you, the flow will feel stuck.

“Failure is not a single cataclysmic event. You don’t fail overnight. Instead, failure is a few errors in judgement repeated every day.” – Jim Rohn

4. Come with Intent

This is something I teach clients because having a question you are seeking an answer to, can help with the calming of the mind. Sometimes, the intention is simply to develop my relationship with the source and so my intent is to listen. I generally then start with ‘Please speak to me’. Other times, there is something I specifically want to know the answer to and so I lead with that question. Having an intention keeps you focused.

5. No Desperation

Unfortunately, if you are too desperate about getting a specific answer, you will find it hard to still your mind. It is best to be in an open and receptive mood. How can you do that when you are actually desperate for an answer?  

Something I would do then, is to let calmness be my intention. I would seek guidance on how to still myself and reduce the feeling of desperation which also then has the effect of allowing me to think more clearly anyway. The other thing I do is write out my vision and goals first and keep my mind on those. If you focus on the need, you remain in the need and you remain reactive to the need. If you focus on the vision and the goal, then you become creator which is your true nature anyway.

Which of these 5 things will you implement today?

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

4 Essentials to Keep You From Staying Satisfied in Life

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It may sound morally objectionable to not want to stay satisfied in life; however, truth be told, it is actually unethical and morally wrong to not pursue what you really want in life and realize your maximum potential.

The people around us in life, whether it’s family, friends, business associates, people under our leadership, or people in our communities, look at our lives and are impacted. They see how we live out our dreams, and how we overcome the obstacles of life and business. This inspires them to do more, better, or different in their own lives. The reality is, many people’s inspiration and reason to excel is resting on us.

With this great responsibility on our shoulders, that is the first reason we must always strive for more and never be satisfied: someone’s success is depending on your success.

In the tough times or even the times we have reaped the harvest of our hard work, always know we must keep going. Yes, savor the victory, but know that this is not the end. We must keep going. If you don’t do it for you at least think of the people that are watching you and observing your life and do it for them.

Here are some practical tips on how to be continually motivated and not easily satisfied with our successes:

1. Frequently Self-Reflect

Socrates famously stated that an unexamined life is not worth living. We should ask ourselves if THIS (certain point in our lives) is our best that we have to offer. If we are being honest with ourselves, we will truthfully answer, NO. Nonetheless, we must not beat ourselves up nor constantly criticize ourselves but always remind ourselves that there is always room for growth.

Life is all about growth and development, and the goal of all development is to realize our true potential. All organisms grow and when they stop growing, you can be pretty sure that their stage for destruction has set in. Humans are probably the only creatures that do not stop growing. While we have stopped growing physically, our other aspects such as psychology, social standing, ambitions and other areas do not stop growing at all.

“The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.” – Wayne Dyer

2. Explore The World

You’ve probably heard of people who’ve stayed their entire lives in their birthplace. These types of people sometimes cannot believe the stories they hear from others that have travelled or lived in various places.

To truly see other people and parts of the world, other than where you come from is a must. Not only does it allow one to appreciate what you do have, but it challenges you to want to do more with your life and not settle. Some of the biggest moments of growth for many people happen when they attend missionary trips, participate in community service, business conferences, and even vacationing in other cities or even countries.

This occurs because your everyday existence and routine of life is challenged. You meet other people who may not be where you are in life or are doing exceptionally more than you. Either way, the first can remind you to always be hungry, and the other can remind you that you are not there yet and there is still more to success and growth; we still have room to grow.

So, travel, meet new people, and stretch your understanding of what life looks like and  what is attainable.

3. Be Curious

Most have heard the old saying when you were young, that “curiosity killed the cat.” Take that saying as a caution not a rule. We should be like children in the level of our curiosity. Curious children ask a lot of questions, and sometimes some of these questions even surprise adults. Because of their powerful curiosity, children think differently compared to adults and therein lies the power of having curiosity as a child.

Some very smart children are not satisfied with some answers adults give them at times, because they intuitively know that either the adult didn’t know the answer or they didn’t understand the topic at all. Don’t be satisfied, and always be eternally curious. Research topics that you know little to nothing about, and be open-minded to topics you are familiar with.

4. Be A Perfectionist

Don’t be satisfied with the present way of doing things. Progress would not happen if we did not tinker with doing things better. Consider textile weaving. People of long ago made textile for clothes using traditional weaving. If we had been satisfied with this way of making textile, we would not have discovered modern technologies of spinning and weaving to produce textiles to clothe billions of people across the world.

So never adopt a mindset that anything is ever perfect with no room for improvement. Systems and processes can always be improved.  

It is hard to work with a perfectionist, but without the perfectionist, we would not have the comfort of modern life. Machines are designed for perfection. An imperfect machine would not work, and even if it could be made to work, it would be hazardous to operate. Perfectionists are not satisfied with mediocre output. They always want the best.

“Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.” – Michael Jordan

A study published in the “Journal of Personality” entitled “On the Development of Perfectionism: The Longitudinal Role of Academic Achievement and Academic Efficacy,” by Lavinia E. Damian and colleagues showed that academic achievement predicted relative increases in both perfectionistic strivings and perfectionistic concerns. This is an important development because it suggests that as people become better and better, their level of perfectionistic pursuit also increases.

Never succumb to the mindset of people who achieve some level of success and say “I have arrived” and “I have made it.” For when we accept this, we have placed a ceiling over our potential and a limit on the truly limitless opportunities that await us. Always strive to be, do, achieve, reach, see, and grow more.

How are you making sure you continue to grow daily in order to be great? Share with us some tips in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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