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How To Ditch Your Dilemmas And Make Kick-Ass Decisions

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Ever had that feeling of being stuck between a rock and a hard place?

There is no doubt you’ve had sleepless nights turning the problem over in your mind, wishing for a way out.

Wishing someone else could swoop in and change it for you.

Fantasizing that if only so-and-so would yield and do such-and-such… then everything would be ok.

 

But we’re old enough and wise enough to know that is rarely what happens.

Sometimes you just have to make a tough decision.

Sometimes it involved sacrifice.

And sometimes we lose a piece of ourselves in the process.

 

But What If I Told You It Didn’t Have To Be That Way?

What if you had a process to get out of any catch 22 situation and still walk away with what you want, and everyone else be happy?

There is a way, but it may mean shifting your perspective on how you think the world works.

You see, in my experience, most folks (and I’m talking intelligent, high achieving folks who can think for themselves) have come to the conclusion that the world is concrete.

I blame classical physics for this.

If x happens, then this leads to y, p times out of q.

And this is fine.

If life were that simple.

And some of us have hypnotised ourselves with pretzel logic to believe that it is.

Newsflash.

It’s not.

 

“Life is complex. Messy. Rough around the edges… but totally malleable” ReTweet This

 

Life is complex. It’s messy. It’s rough around the edges, and squidgy in the middle. It shifts, it turns, it surprises you and disappoints you and thrills you – often all simultaneously.

There are sooooo many variables in any situation you’re facing, there is no such thing as x leads to y.

And thinking that way keeps you stuck.

Thinking that way limits your options, your creativity and the quality of experience you will allow yourself to have in your world.

You essentially box yourself in to a limited, “inevitable doom”.

(Which, incidentally, you also created in your mind first!)

 

How To Think Of Your World

Instead of things being set in stone, think of them as yielding gently to your choices, and your thoughts.

Try thinking of the world as malleable. Dynamic. Fluid.

You are indeed the creator of your reality.

On every level.

Start acting like it.

How?

 

destiny inspirational picture quote about life

Dang the Doom

Ok, take that catch 22 you’ve been thinking about. That situation you’ve decided there is no way out of.

Now, most probably it involves other people. And you’re worried that whatever decision you make, someone is going to be hurt, or upset, or react in a way you don’t want them to.

Right?

Right.

So here’s the solution.

And hang with me before you have a reaction, because this is only step one.

 

Step 1

Make the decision that will make you the happiest first. (Taking out of the equation anyone else’s opinions… at this first stage).

Got it?

Ok, write it down. You need to commit this to paper so you can’t wiggle out of it and conveniently “forget” what would make you happy.

(Believe me, I’ve seen this happen in front of my very eyes on coaching calls… the subconscious can be sooo sneaky!)

Right – on to step 2.

 

Step 2

Practice putting all your attention on your happy outcome. Every time worries about other people, and “potential” (read: dreamt up, imagined, construed) downsides spring to mind, just drop those thoughts, and return to the happy thoughts.

Laver, rinse, repeat….

Several times per day.

Seems too simple huh?

Try doing it. Not so easy. But with a bit of practice you’ll get it, and you’ll find your groove and make magic happen.

 

But I Don’t Want To Upset Anyone!

So often folks will shy away from choosing their happy outcome because they want to keep everyone else happy. And whilst this is admirable, and yes, compassionate – there is a flawed premise.

This assumption that you’re leaning back on, presupposes that you can control other peoples’ happiness.

You cannot.

You can only influence your own. And by you being happy, you make those around you even happier.

You empower them.

You inspire them.

You show them that they too can get out there, be who they really are, do what makes them happy, kick some ass, and take some names…. (in a positive way, of course, lol..)

No more co-dependence.

No more zapped energy.

No more catch 22.

Quod Erat Demonstradum.

 

three choices in life inspiration

 

Here’s the thing:

1. If someone wants to be a victim, no matter what YOU do, they’re going to achieve it… one way or another. So shed that burden right now.

2. If you think about something bad happening, or someone having a problem with your decision, you will flat-out create that. Every time. No question.

3. If your decision directly affects another, as long as you are taking the happy decision aligned with your highest intention, and the biggest you possible, you can’t hurt anyone. It’s like when you’re vibrating at a high frequency, the folks who don’t match your frequency spin-off. They can’t get near you. And if your decision isn’t in line with their highest good, their frequency won’t match yours and they won’t be affected by you. They’ll spin off and have their adventures elsewhere, and be unaffected by all the horrible things you’ve dreamt up to create your dilemma.

So at this point, you may have questions about how to apply this to your specific circumstance.

Do feel free to ask away in the comments section.

Or even head over to my site and send me an email. I read every message, and I’m happy to help.

 

Oh, and you may want to print this article off, and pin it somewhere you can see it every day – as a reminder that you really are the creator of everything in your world. 😉

 

Here’s to your inevitable success!

 

Laura Leigh Clarke

a.k.a. the Whole Heart, Whole Brain Business Mentor

Wire Yourself for Wealth

 

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In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”

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Why This Gap Exists

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What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.

Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap

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1. Practice Mutual Empathy

Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.

2. Maintain Professional Boundaries

Superiors should separate personal issues from professional decision-making. Consistency, fairness, and integrity build trust, and trust is the foundation of a motivated team.

3. Follow the Golden Rule

Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.

4. Avoid Micromanagement

Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.

5. Empower Employees to Grow

Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.

6. Communicate in All Directions

Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.

7. Overcome Insecurities

Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.

8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship

True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.

9. Eliminate Favoritism

Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.

10. Recognize Efforts Promptly

Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.

11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews

When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.

12. Provide Leadership Development

Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.

13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles

Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.

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Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:

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  • Design compelling career paths

  • Simplify HR processes

  • Redefine the value HR brings

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Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.

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