Change Your Mindset
A Neuropsychologists 4 Habits for a Successful and Happy Life
A habit is a behavior that becomes automatic over time.
Today, the world we live in provides us with endless opportunities.
Consequently, these countless paths can take us down roads that can all too easily, make or break our lives. This, along with the increasing prevalence of AI, leaves many of us faced with the looming question of purpose…what makes humans successful and happy despite different circumstances?
I’m Dr. Kendal Maxwell and I’m a practicing neuropsychologist, which means I study the connection between the human brain and its associated behaviors (in a wide variety of people with an even wider range of medical problems). When the COVID-19 pandemic began I became even more intrigued by human behavior as people’s everyday structure was torn away from them, and realized a revolutionary social experiment was occurring right in front of my eyes.
Not only was I watching how people’s habits were affecting them (both positively and negatively), I was also experiencing first hand my own, as I also began to struggle to keep myself together during a time of collective trauma.
With that being said, the first thing I did was take a deep dive into researching habits to help myself as well as my patients. How could I develop a physical, tangible tool to help others not only cope, but come out on the other side a better version of themselves? A self-guided habit journal was the answer. That is when I created 12 Months to Happier Habits, then called upon a brilliant and artistic friend of mine, Victoria Nicole Varela, to bring creative life to our project.
This journal helps get you back on track by eliminating negative habits and by helping you introduce new positive habits which allows you to show up as the best version of yourself. But what exactly are habits? Why do they have such a powerful and profound effect on our daily lives and even more so, our total existence?
A habit is a behavior that becomes automatic over time. Once a behavior becomes a habit, it involves less work for the brain and body to do it over any new task. From a brain perspective, our body is motivated by the release of neurotransmitters that make us feel good. These include dopamine, oxytocin, endorphins, and serotonin.
While there are many habits that can lead to increased success and happiness, I am going to focus on the top four that I feel impact these neurotransmitters the most and lead to a life where one would feel successful and happy despite what specifically they are doing otherwise.
1. Engage in Purposeful Living
Each and every day you should focus on 1 activity that makes you feel a sense of purpose. When we accomplish things, regardless of if they big or small, our serotonin (a chemical linked to feelings of confidence), increases. Additionally, after we accomplish a task we also have an increase in dopamine as we feel a sense internal or external reward. And purpose changes throughout our lives, which is an important thing to remember.
In our 20’s purpose may look like completing a homework assignment for a college course to further our career goals. In our 30’s it may look like feeding a child to help them survive, or building or fixing something for a home we just bought. Our 40’s and onward may look like volunteering or planning a trip with people we love, etc. Ask yourself each morning what is one thing you want to accomplish? Make it happen. Be present with the feeling of having accomplished this before you go to bed at night.
2. Be Willing to Move
There is countless research available proving that the brain and heart are incredibly connected. Taking care of the heart is vital for longevity of life as it inevitably impacts the brain and can reduce the likelihood of developing some form of future dementia. It could be walking 7 days a week for 40 minutes, engaging in high intensity interval training for 20 minutes 3 days a week, and/or incorporating yoga into your weekly routine (my personal favorite).
There are many options that have demonstrated themselves to be effective at leading to improvements in physical and mental health as we age. I also want to note that there are many ways to adapt exercise if you are physically limited, such as chair yoga or chair tai chi. (Victoria is a fan of bathtub stretching!) Additionally, exercise releases all 4 of those feel-good neurotransmitters mentioned above, making it the natural drug of choice for literally anyone.
3. Make Time for Mindfulness Meditation
To feel successful and happy as we go about our daily lives, we must be okay with being with ourselves, in our own body. Mindfulness meditation assists with this process. By sitting, laying down, or even engaging in walking meditation on a daily basis for 20-40 minutes, we naturally regulate our nervous system. Doing so reduces inflammation in both our body and brain, and releases dopamine, serotonin and endorphins.
Meditation increases our ability to attend to and focus on activities outside of meditation itself, leading us to be more successful at any task we take on. It also has been shown to improve overall mood. In individuals who have cognitive changes later in life, it has been shown to reduce the size of the amygdala so we react better to stress and fear.
4. Stay Connected to Others
Loneliness has been shown to be a risk factor for mortality in older adults. Additionally, when we think about successful ideas and the ability to make an idea become alive, it always involves multiple people working together. The human species thrives on feeling connected and doing so in healthy ways increases all four neurotransmitters! It should be a daily habit to push yourself to find a way to connect with someone. This may mean engaging in a group hobby, group goal, group volunteer opportunity, calling someone you love, etc.
There is even research that shows going to a place where other people are at even if you do not engage with them socially, such as a coffee shop, can be helpful for us on an emotional level.
Now that you have these four habits you can begin to implement them into your life. Sometimes it’s easier to start with 1 habit at a time for a month, so you don’t feel overwhelmed by this process. This is where 12 Months to Happier Habits can help you. Writing down the habit you want to increase, preparing your life to make room for it, and checking in with yourself on a weekly basis will lead you to be more successful with creating change.
I can’t wait to see the person you are truly meant to be when you make time for these habits in your life, as your best self is already within you and is just waiting for you to start the journey.
Change Your Mindset
How to Unlock the Million-Dollar Ideas Trapped in Your Nervous System
You likely have a million-dollar idea entirely trapped inside your nervous system right now.
But here is the harsh reality: million-dollar ideas are completely useless without a million-dollar embodiment and a regulated nervous system to execute them. If you feel separated from your dreams, stuck in endless planning loops, or constantly playing out self-sabotaging behaviors, the problem isn’t a lack of talent or strategy. The problem is that you are trying to operate from a baseline of survival.
Most creatives and ambitious entrepreneurs learn very early to superimpose stress directly on top of their creativity. Whether it was tight school deadlines, harsh early criticism, or the pressure to prove your worthiness through your output, what once started as a pure, flowing, somatic experience turns into a highly pressurized, heady mental exercise. We start to intellectualize our creativity, mistakenly believing that ideas live exclusively in our minds.
They don’t. Ideas are somatic. They are energetic downloads that require an open, regulated nervous system to receive and execute them. Here is exactly how to stop creating from stress and start unlocking the deep, vital creativity required to scale your life and business.
The Myth of the Hustle Crunch
We all know the drill: you wait until the last minute, procrastinate, and then crunch aggressively for 48 hours straight to hit a deadline. Sure, the project gets done. We can absolutely squeeze a lot of output out of our systems through sheer stress.
But at what cost?
Creating purely from stress is entirely unsustainable. The energetic signature of that stress doesn’t just evaporate when the project is done; it gets directly encoded into the work. It doesn’t matter if you are building a SaaS product, designing a beautiful piece of furniture, or writing a sales page—the end product holds the signature of your fried nervous system.
When you operate strictly from this activated survival state, you fry your adrenals, ruin your sleep, destroy your digestion, and disconnect from your relationships. True, effortless creativity cannot survive here.
The Power of the Ventral Vagal State
True creativity comes from what is called your ventral vagal state. This is a specific aspect of your parasympathetic nervous system—the exact opposite of the “fight or flight” survival response. It is the “rest and digest” state where your body finally feels safe enough to take care of itself and repair.
When you practice returning to this state frequently, you gain access to higher functions. In this state, social connection, openness, and deep flow become readily available. This is the place where you can articulate your vision effortlessly and remain entirely present. In the ventral vagal state, there is absolutely no fear or scarcity.
A 3-Step Roadmap to Unfurl Your Nervous System
To get those million-dollar ideas unstuck, you must actively clear the tension where they are trapped.
- Acknowledge the Stress Patterns (Step Zero) You must first realize and admit that you have been creating from a place of stress, activation, and survival. Awareness is the foundational step to change.
- Pause, Regulate, and Unfurl You must intentionally slow down. Through deep breathing and curbing your distractions, you allow your nervous system to “unfurl.” You will suddenly start to notice the physical tension you carry—perhaps you are constantly squeezing your hips, clenching your pelvic floor, or grinding your jaw (which is where 90% of people hold their tension).
As you relieve this physical tension through touch and stretching, the trapped emotions will begin to surface. You might feel frustration, uncelebrated grief, or old shame. This is exactly where your potential is trapped.
- Get Deeply Curious When these emotions surface, do not bounce your awareness back up into your head to try and “solve” them logically. Meet these places with curiosity and acceptance. Every fear and every piece of tense, awkward emotional work holds a seed of massive potential. Liberating these feelings in your body is what ultimately clears your system, leaving you free, empowered, and incredibly grounded.
Devotion Over Discipline
Once your nervous system is regulated, it is time to create. But instead of relying on the typical definitions of hustle and willpower, you need to cultivate something much deeper: Devotion.
Devotion is a profound connection with your integrity and a willingness to show up consistently, even when it’s hard. It is making a practice to create from depth—which simply means being intensely present and connected to yourself and the moment.
Set a ritual. Maybe it’s moving your body and journaling for 20 minutes every morning, or sitting down to write at 9:00 AM sharp every day. Let it be a somatic, feel-good experience. Do not squash the creativity by putting too much immediate mental pressure on the outcome; you can always come back and edit later.
The roadmap is incredibly simple, but it is not easy. You have to learn how to hold yourself upright through massive emotional experiences without falling apart or running back to the familiar comfort of stress. If you want to build a truly great, million-dollar life that continually builds upon its own systems, you must stop operating from survival and start creating from a fully regulated, devoted state.
Here’s a great video by Kev Vanderzel on how to you can Build a Million Dollar Nervous System, watch your career explode
Change Your Mindset
Finding The Right Speech Therapy Support Starts With Understanding Your Options
Communication shapes nearly every part of daily life. It affects how we learn, build relationships, succeed at work, and express our thoughts and emotions. So when speaking, understanding language, or swallowing becomes difficult, the impact can extend far beyond a single conversation. Fortunately, speech therapy offers support for people of all ages, from young children developing language skills to adults recovering from illness or injury.
One of the most helpful things you can do before seeking support is understand what speech therapy involves. Knowing the different approaches available makes it easier to recognise when professional help may be beneficial and what you can expect along the way.
Not Every Communication Challenge Needs The Same Approach
Many people are surprised to learn that there are different types of speech therapy, each designed to address specific communication or swallowing needs. According to Cleveland State University’s guide to speech-language pathology, speech-language pathologists work across a broad range of areas, including speech sounds, language, fluency, voice, cognitive communication, swallowing disorders, and social communication, tailoring treatment to each individual’s goals and challenges.
This personalised approach is one of the reasons speech therapy can be so effective. Rather than following a one-size-fits-all program, therapists assess each person’s strengths and identify the techniques most likely to support meaningful progress.
Early Support Can Make A Lasting Difference
Many communication difficulties become easier to manage when they’re identified early.
For children, speech therapy may help improve pronunciation, vocabulary development, sentence structure or social communication before these challenges begin affecting learning and confidence at school. Early intervention can also help parents better understand how to encourage communication during everyday activities at home.
Adults benefit from early support as well. Whether difficulties appear after a stroke, traumatic brain injury or another medical condition, beginning therapy promptly may improve recovery and help rebuild important communication skills.
Seeking help early doesn’t necessarily mean the problem is severe. Sometimes it simply prevents small difficulties from becoming larger obstacles later on.
Speech Therapy Isn’t Just About Speaking Clearly
When people hear the term “speech therapy,” they often think about pronunciation.
In reality, speech-language pathologists help with much more.
Some people need support in understanding language rather than producing it. Others experience stuttering that affects their confidence during conversations. Voice disorders may cause someone to sound consistently hoarse or strained, while swallowing disorders can create safety concerns during meals.
Cognitive communication is another important area. Following neurological conditions, individuals may need assistance with memory, attention, problem-solving or organising thoughts for effective communication.
This broad scope allows therapists to support communication in many different ways depending on each person’s needs.
Progress Often Happens Through Everyday Practice
Speech therapy sessions are important, but improvement rarely happens during appointments alone.
The greatest progress often comes from practising new skills between sessions.
Children might play games that encourage language development, while adults recovering from injury may complete exercises that strengthen communication or swallowing abilities. Families frequently play an important role by reinforcing strategies at home and celebrating small improvements along the way.
Consistency matters more than perfection.
Even short periods of regular practice can gradually build confidence and create meaningful long-term progress.
Every Age Group Faces Different Challenges
Speech therapy isn’t limited to one stage of life.
Toddlers may need help reaching developmental language milestones. School-aged children often work on speech sounds, reading-related language skills or social communication. Teenagers may focus on fluency or confidence during presentations and conversations.
Adults seek speech therapy for many different reasons as well. Some experience voice strain from professional speaking, while others receive therapy following neurological illnesses, surgery or injuries affecting communication.
Older adults may also benefit from treatment addressing cognitive communication or swallowing changes associated with ageing or medical conditions.
Because communication needs change throughout life, therapy evolves alongside them.
Families Play A Bigger Role Than They Realise
Parents, partners and caregivers often wonder whether they should simply leave therapy to the professionals.
In reality, they’re an important part of the process.
Therapists frequently provide practical strategies that families can incorporate into ordinary routines. Reading together, asking open-ended questions, slowing conversations or creating opportunities for meaningful interaction can all reinforce what happens during therapy sessions.
Support doesn’t require complicated exercises.
Sometimes the most valuable progress comes from making everyday communication feel positive, patient and encouraging.
Choosing A Therapist Is About More Than Qualifications
Professional credentials matter, but they’re only part of the picture.
A good speech-language pathologist also understands how to build trust, explain goals clearly and adapt therapy as progress develops. Every person learns differently, so flexibility and communication are just as important as technical knowledge.
When choosing a provider, consider asking about their experience with your specific concerns, how progress is measured and what role family members will play throughout treatment.
Feeling comfortable with your therapist encourages open communication and helps create a stronger partnership from the beginning.
Small Improvements Often Lead To Big Changes
Speech therapy rarely produces dramatic overnight transformations.
Instead, progress tends to arrive through small, consistent victories.
A child pronounces a difficult sound correctly for the first time. Someone recovering from a stroke completes a conversation with greater confidence. A person who once avoided social situations begins participating more comfortably again.
These moments may seem small individually, but together they represent meaningful improvements in independence, confidence and quality of life.
Communication influences almost everything we do. Investing time in developing those skills, whether for yourself or someone you love, can create benefits that extend well beyond words alone.
Shift Your Mindset
How High Performers Navigate Unexpected Personal Crises
Discipline collapses in a single phone call. A calendar built with military precision, a morning routine dialed in for years — none of it survives the moment a doctor walks in with bad news or a car door won’t open. Real high performance isn’t about dodging the hit. It’s about what happens in the ninety seconds after it lands, and how fast the recovery system kicks in.
The First Move Is Always Delegation Not Control
Something strange happens to people who’ve built serious success. The instinct isn’t to grab the wheel harder. It’s the opposite — hand off everything that isn’t survival, and hand it off fast.
Picture this. A regional sales director gets T-boned by a commercial box truck on a highway outside Palm Springs. Shoulder shattered, concussion, three weeks of hospital before physical therapy even starts. The old playbook says fight through it, answer emails from the hospital bed, negotiate the insurance claim between painkiller doses. High performers don’t do that anymore. Not the sharp ones, anyway.
What they actually do is triage. Medical care goes to doctors. Legal exposure and insurance headaches go to specialists who deal with exactly this kind of wreck every single week — someone like the team behind Desert Injury Law, because commercial vehicle accidents come loaded with layers of liability, corporate insurance policies, and paperwork that eats healthy people alive, let alone someone in a sling. Handing that off isn’t weakness. It’s resource allocation. The brain only has so much bandwidth for stress before decision quality tanks across the board, and a person negotiating with a trucking company’s legal team while also trying to heal a shoulder is going to lose on both fronts.
That’s the real skill nobody talks about at leadership conferences. Knowing what to let go of, immediately, before ego gets in the way.
Compartmentalized Thinking Keeps The Mind From Flooding
Here’s the thing about crisis. It doesn’t arrive as one problem. It arrives as forty problems wearing a trench coat. The mortgage, the kids’ school pickup, the client presentation, the physical pain, the insurance forms, the missed gym sessions — all screaming at once.
High performers build a mental triage system almost instinctively. Split everything into two buckets.
Bucket one — controllable right now:
- Today’s pain management and physical needs
- The next single work task that actually requires personal input
- One decision that moves the day forward, nothing more
Bucket two — waiting, parked, not forgotten:
- Legal and financial matters already handed to professionals
- Long-term business strategy that can pause for thirty days
- Relationship conversations that need energy the person doesn’t have yet
Why does this matter so much? Because trying to hold all forty problems in active memory at once is what causes the burnout spiral, not the crisis itself. Athletes recovering from career-threatening injuries use this exact method. Ask any NFL player who’s torn an ACL — the ones who bounce back fastest aren’t obsessing over the whole season. They’re obsessing over today’s rehab set. That’s it. Nothing else gets airtime.
Rebuilding The Routine Looks Nothing Like The Old One
Forget bouncing back to the exact schedule that existed before. That version of the routine is gone, and pretending otherwise just delays the real adjustment.
Take a founder recovering from spinal surgery after a fall. Before the injury, sixty-hour weeks, back-to-back meetings, red-eye flights twice a month. After? The whole operating rhythm gets rebuilt from the studs up.
What Actually Changes During Recovery
- Morning meetings shift to voice memos reviewed at whatever hour the body allows
- A COO or trusted second gets temporary signing authority on anything under a set dollar threshold
- Client-facing work gets condensed into two focused days instead of spread thin across five
- Physical therapy gets blocked on the calendar with the same seriousness as a board meeting, no exceptions, no rescheduling for “urgent” calls that usually aren’t
Notice something here — none of this is about pushing through. It’s about redesigning the machine so it still runs while one part of it heals. Companies that survive a founder’s medical crisis almost always share this trait. Someone built redundancy into the system long before it was needed, or built it fast once the crisis hit.
Skip The Toxic Positivity Lean Into Cold Facts Instead
There’s a particular breed of advice that sounds good on a motivational poster and does real damage in a hospital room. “Everything happens for a reason.” “Stay positive, it’ll all work out.” High performers who actually recover well tend to reject that script almost entirely.
What replaces it is a blunt, fact-based assessment. What’s the actual prognosis. What’s the realistic timeline. What’s the worst-case financial exposure if the business stalls for two months. Nobody heals faster by lying to themselves about the size of the problem.
This is where outside support earns its keep. A therapist who specializes in trauma recovery. A financial advisor who can run the real numbers instead of comforting guesses. A business partner willing to say “this quarter is a write-off, plan accordingly” instead of pretending the wheels aren’t wobbling.
Practical tools worth building into the recovery process:
- A written daily non-negotiable list, capped at three items
- A weekly check-in call with one accountability partner who isn’t afraid of hard truths
- A standing rule that any decision made in acute pain or under six hours of sleep gets revisited in 48 hours before it’s finalized
- Permission, explicitly stated out loud, to say “not today” to anything outside the top three priorities
Makes sense, right? The goal was never invincibility. It was never about pretending the crash, the diagnosis, or the lawsuit didn’t happen.
Recovery Is The Real Performance Metric
Anyone can look disciplined when life is smooth. That’s not hard. The actual test — the one that separates people who build lasting success from people who burn out chasing it — shows up in the middle of the mess. In the delegation calls made from a hospital bed. In the routines rebuilt from scratch instead of forced back into an old shape that no longer fits.
High performers don’t get a pass on crisis. Nobody does. What they get is a system, built long before disaster strikes, for putting themselves back together without losing the business, the relationships, or the mind along the way. That’s the whole game.
Change Your Mindset
How to Build Confidence without Comparing Yourself to Others
Scroll through your feed for five minutes, and you’ll probably start measuring your life against someone else’s highlight reel. Comparison culture does that. It creeps in through every like, every filtered photo, and every “perfect” life update, quietly chipping away at how you feel about yourself.
But real confidence doesn’t come from beating someone else’s score. Instead, it grows from your own internal standard. That’s why in this piece, we’ll cover how to spot your comparison triggers, build a personal benchmark, practice self-compassion, focus on your own growth, and make choices rooted in self-respect.
Recognizing What Triggers Comparison
You can’t fix what you don’t notice, so the first step is figuring out where comparison sneaks in. For most people, social media leads the list.
Every scroll puts you face to face with someone else’s best moment, and your brain treats that curated snapshot like the full picture. You start measuring your life against a highlight reel instead of a real one, and that gap is where the doubt creeps in.
But it’s not just apps. Milestones do it too. When you measure your career, relationship, or finances against someone else’s timeline, you ignore that your journey has its own pace, setbacks, and wins.
Building Internal Standards for Success
Once you stop measuring yourself against other people, you need something else to measure against. That’s where internal standards come in.
Start by defining what success actually looks like for you. Maybe it’s financial freedom, maybe it’s a flexible schedule, or maybe it’s just waking up without dreading your day. Whatever it is, it has to come from you, not from what looks impressive on someone else’s feed.
From there, track your progress against your own past, not against a stranger’s highlight reel. Are you handling stress better than you did last year? Did you learn a skill you didn’t have six months ago? Those wins count, even if nobody else sees them.
Practicing Self-Compassion as a Confidence Tool
Confidence built on constant self-criticism doesn’t hold up, so this is where self-compassion comes in.
Start by catching the voice in your head that jumps straight to blame. Instead of telling yourself you failed because you’re not good enough, try asking what you’d say to a friend in the same spot. That alone turns a harsh inner critic into someone who actually helps you improve.
From there, treat yourself with the same patience you’d offer anyone else. You wouldn’t tell a friend they’re worthless for messing up a presentation, so don’t say it to yourself either. Over time, that consistency builds a version of confidence that doesn’t crumble the moment things go wrong.
Focusing on Personal Growth Over External Validation
Once you’ve got your own standards in place, the next step is choosing goals that actually reflect them. A comparison-based goal sounds like “get a better job than my friend.” A growth-based goal sounds like “get better at my job than I was six months ago.”
The second one keeps you focused on your own progress, so you’re not stuck chasing a moving target that depends on someone else’s life.
From there, celebrate the small wins along the way, not just the big ones. Finished a tough project? Handled a hard conversation without losing your cool? Those moments add up, and they build real momentum. Confidence grows from noticing your own progress, not from waiting for a finish line that never really arrives.
Making Personal Decisions From Self-Respect, Not Comparison
Your body is part of this conversation too, and the decisions you make about it deserve the same self-respect as everything else. The tricky part is telling the difference between a goal that’s really yours and one that only exists because someone else set the bar.
Say a coworker drops two dress sizes, and suddenly you want to lose weight too. That’s pressure talking, not self-respect. But if the goal fits your own health plans, and it existed before anyone else’s results showed up, that’s a different story.
Cosmetic decisions work the same way. If you’re considering a tummy tuck, you’d want to consult a tummy tuck surgeon in Manhattan for the same reason you’d consult a doctor for any other personal choice. It moves you toward your own goals, not someone else’s idea of what your body should look like.
And that’s the real test for any decision, big or small. Ask yourself whether you’re doing this for yourself or to keep up. When the answer is self-respect, you already know it’s the right call.
Final Thoughts
Real confidence never depended on anyone else’s life, and it never will. It comes from the standards you set, the growth you notice in yourself, and the decisions you make because they’re right for you, not because they keep up with someone else’s pace.
Start small. Notice when comparison creeps in, treat yourself with the same patience you’d give a friend, and measure your progress against your own past. Do that consistently, and confidence stops feeling like something you chase. It becomes something you already have.
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