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12 Vital Life Lessons I Wish They Taught Me In School

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Being a millennial, I have very few regrets as I was fortunate to grow up in an education system that was entrenched in technology. My one frustration with the education system though is that it didn’t prepare me well for being an adult. School still skips the fundamentals of what we all need in life to be successful.

It didn’t give me the toolbox that I discovered later on which could have made me more successful earlier on in life. The one positive thing it did though was push me off the traditional path and towards entrepreneurship in the hope that something better must have existed compared to what I was being taught at the time.

Don’t get me wrong; I am not anti-education or anything like that, I just feel that the high school and university phases of our lives still have a lot of gaps. In this blog post, I hope to address what I think should be covered and the reasons why.

Below are the twelve vital lessons I wish they taught me at school:

1. Passive learning doesn’t work

I’m sure we can all remember days at school where we sit and listen to the teacher speak for two hours while we listen and copy notes from the whiteboard. The reason the vast majority of this information never get’s retained in our minds is that we are consuming the information passively.

Passive learning of information without emotion means that we will not get the results from what we are learning. Every thirty minutes of learning should have a change in state to allow our bodies to wake up and stay on the ball.

The second component to this idea is the need to link more emotion to our learning. When we learn a concept through a story that is emotional, we are much more likely to retain the knowledge and understand what the message is that we should be getting.

When I was studying, I found it hard to remember the stories I was taught because the stories were often outdated and not relatable to my classmates or me. Fast forward to the present, and I am learning new ideas every day because I link emotion to the learning process.

Even if the content I am learning doesn’t have any emotion, I will throw in some emotive YouTube videos every thirty minutes to anchor my state and create emotion.

2. You must develop yourself every day

In school, I never heard the phrase personal development. It was only when I was in my twenties that I discovered what it meant. The concept of developing yourself every day can really affect your success in life.

By taking small steps every day to be better than you were the previous day, you very quickly compound your results, your value, and your skills. The concepts of personal development have been around for a long time, and I would love to see these become part of the school system.

Even if you learnt no facts, no mathematics, and did no sport at school, I still believe you can be highly successful if you understand the vital content of personal development. It’s a big call I know, but it’s something I have seen first hand.

3. Money is not power

Society, the media, and school taught me that money is power, and it’s something I should strive for. I can vividly remember back to year ten when my high school careers councillor started talking about possible careers I might want.

She tried to lure me into different careers based on the promise of money. For those of you who are in Australia, you can probably guess what she recommended – become a tradie (tradesperson).

It’s true that in Australia tradespeople make a very good income, but a lot of them are also very depressed and unhappy in their occupation. Rather than trying to help me find my purpose, school just wanted to help me find a job or an income I would settle for.

With any negative comes a positive. For me, I discovered entrepreneurship because I didn’t want someone giving me orders or telling me how much I should earn. I liked having ideas and then testing them. I liked that my annual income was determined by how much valued I added and how good I was at pleasing customers.

Money will never make you happy: finding out your dream and then pursuing it until your last day on Earth will.

4. Giving is the lifeblood of your success

We’ve all had an experience where we watch an awesome movie and then the first thing we want to do is call our friends and tell them how great it was. The best thing often about an experience is not the experience itself; it’s the opportunity to share it with our friends, which is why social media has exploded.

This simple idea is very similar to giving. The look on people’s faces when you give something to someone that they weren’t expecting is priceless. You will feel better than you have ever felt when you do things for other people and put a smile on their face.

This philosophy of giving was not what I was taught at school. School taught me that giving was all about charity and only giving to large, not for profit organisations. The donations made to these companies are often invisible, and the person receiving the assistance never see’s you.

Worse still, a large proportion of your donation often never get’s to the person who needs it because it’s eaten up in administrative costs. Giving is so much more than just throwing money at something and hoping it will fix itself.

“The concept of giving is to create value for other people without expecting anything in return. It’s about doing things for the greater good and not operating from a mindset of scarcity” – Tim Denning

Giving is actually not about donations at all. Giving is what makes the world go round, and if everybody did it religiously every day then, the world’s challenges would be far fewer than they are right now.

Giving involves using the gifts you have been given to make people’s lives better. Whether that’s through a blog like Addicted2Success or some other means, there are limited ways for you to give back without necessarily going down the path of charity. I wish school taught me this.

5. The strategies you need are found in non-fiction and autobiographies

At school, there was always a strong focus on fictional stories. These stories can be great for the imagination; the challenge is the story is made up, making it hard to relate too. The books I discovered later in life were non-fiction and autobiographies.

There is no better way to be successful in life than read about people who have already done remarkable things and learn exactly what they did to achieve their goals. These stories highlight the barriers to greatness and show how failure is critical for any pursuit of success.

School should have books like Think And Grow Rich, The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, and The Alchemist as part of the syllabus.

These books are named by so many successful entrepreneurs as being a significant contributor to their success. Imagine if all school children got the same benefit as a mandatory part of their education.
I wish I were made to read these books when I was at school.

6. How to make an income

School is a lot about the theory of how the world should work. The part that was missing for me at school was the practical steps to make an income whether that was through entrepreneurship or working for someone else.

In school, I was led to believe that if I wanted to work for someone else, I would be asked detailed questions about my education. The reality, after having interviewed for lots of high ranking corporate jobs, is that most organisations will never ask you about your education.

There are some specialised fields like medicine and law that will ask, outside of that; it’s becoming less and less relevant. It’s quite easy for any of us to rack up a huge university debt and get a piece of paper in a field such as business or marketing, but most other people can do that as well.

Don’t get me wrong, university degrees are great to have, it’s just that they will not be the saving grace that the school system makes out they are. Experience in business, passion, rapport, strong emotional intelligence, a good imagination, and the guts to have a go will get you much further. I wish I learnt this in school and not later in life. Better late than never.

7. The truth about failure

Failure is your real education. Failure gives you the mental toughness. Nothing is easy, and nothing can prepare you for the challenges you will face. School taught me to try and be perfect and get straight A’s. Perfection was my downfall because it’s an impossible requirement to meet.

It was only later when I studied electronic music outside of school that I learned that imperfection is where all the beauty is. Imperfection is what makes rock music so addictive and it’s the foundation of all popular music.

Failing on a maths test was the greatest lesson I learned in my school career. Why? Because I realised I had no interest in maths, and I was able not to waste too much time on it. Had I not have failed, I could have put hours of work into something I hated which is the recipe for disaster.

It wasn’t until after I finished school that I learned this lesson. I wish I had learnt it earlier.

8. You whole life is about salesmanship

Everything you do every single day revolves around selling something. You are either selling your business idea, selling a concept to internal stakeholders, selling the benefits of cleaning up to your children, or selling the idea of a holiday to your partner.

I never learned any sales skills at school and I wish I had. Learning how to sell and attending yearly sales training events has allowed me to communicate an idea, and get people to join me on my mission both in business and in my personal life.

9. Public speaking will put you ahead of the pack

School always made me think that public speaking was for politicians. To be an entrepreneur, thought leader, sales person, or just anyone that matters, you need to be able to speak in front of other people. The better you get at it, the easier it will be to get buy-in from other people to follow your vision.

I wish I had known about Toastmasters at school. I wish I were forced to do it. Since joining Toastmasters, I have learned why public speaking is so difficult and how to overcome the fear of audiences. With a little practice, it’s perfectly achievable to get good at it.

Forget about yourself, concentrate on delivering value to your audience, and not about everyone’s opinion. That pretty much sums up public speaking. Now go practice it!

10. Alkaline food will give you the energy you need

Thinking back to my school days, I didn’t have a lot of success with studying because I regularly suffered from low levels of energy and frequent colds. This was not uncommon, and many of my school friends had similar challenges.

If I analyse my school diet it consisted of zero water, lots of soft drink, pizza, pasta, sausage rolls, hot dogs, and ice creams. Unfortunately, not a lot has changed at schools although there is some awareness about soft drink nowadays.

In terms of nutritional education, there wasn’t a whole lot except for the lie that is the food pyramid which still appears in my doctor’s office when I see him once a year. Had I have known just how large the proportion of fruits and vegetables needed to be, and more importantly, just how good the benefits were to eating more from this food group, my health would have turned out a lot different.

There’s no point dwelling too much on the past (this subject has been a frustration for me), but it’s my hope that nutrition will play a bigger part in school life going forward. Thankfully, we have ambassadors like Jamie Oliver, who are carrying the message.

11. Advanced computer skills will give you a voice

In adult life, you enter a very noisy world where it’s even harder to be heard. The ability to be able to put together websites, create content, and share your message on social media is critical. If you can learn basic coding, then you will be even more ahead than the average person.

I was lucky that I first got onto the Internet as a kid in 1996. Before then, I had worked on MS-Dos and Windows 95 computers. This gave me an edge because a lot of my friends didn’t have this luxury. A computer allowed me to solve modern problems far quicker and hone in on my computer skills.

I was fortunate enough to be an earlier adopter of Google, eBay, and Amazon. These websites showed me where the world was heading at its part of what has allowed me to work in tech day-to-day. It was the gentle inspiration I needed at a time in teenage life when we have no idea what our future looks like.

While traditional education has an element of IT subjects, I still wish that there was an even greater focus on the more advanced computer skills that are needed in an ever-changing global economy. These skills during my own schooling would have been very valuable to me, and many of you reading.

12. Everyone should try entrepreneurship

A lot of my school life centred on the fact that I should work for someone else. The idea of starting a business was almost like a taboo subject that only suicidal base jumpers would dare try. I wish school had taught me that everyone should try entrepreneurship at least once.

Even if you choose to work for someone else, you are still an entrepreneur in a way because you have a small (or large) slice of someone else’s business you have to manage. You can’t escape entrepreneurship, and I believe it’s good to try it.

You can learn anything you put your mind to even if you don’t meet the wah wah entrepreneur personality type that is portrayed on TV. Hopefully, though, you like working with other people because you can’t do everything yourself.

What do you wish you learned at school? Are any of these above skills missing for you? Let me know in the comments section below or on my website timdenning.net or my Facebook. 

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship.You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

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13 Comments

13 Comments

  1. Robert

    Jun 28, 2017 at 12:34 pm

    I think schools should also pay more attention to personal finance. Your points are also very good and well founded.

    Robert

  2. Sascha Rutledge

    Feb 8, 2017 at 4:38 am

    Awesome post. about Batching is a huge one for me. I always give myself way more tasks than I can complete in a reasonable amount of time so the annoying small tasks pile up until I can batch them.

  3. Thea Dunlap

    Jul 12, 2016 at 3:16 am

    Wonderful article. Love the advice here and they are very beneficial. Made me want to rethink of my plans. 🙂

  4. Pam Bowers

    Jul 6, 2016 at 4:19 pm

    Love this article! I am a home based social worker nearly 60 and while I love my job, the best thing Ive done for balance is become a small business owner selling antiques on eBay. I think we all need to stretch out of our comfort zone, continue to grow and expand in what we are passionate about to maximize what we get from life and give to the world. And a bit of mad money in upcoming retirement never hurts either : ) All the best, Pam

    • Tim Denning

      Jul 11, 2016 at 7:37 am

      Thanks Pam for reading. I love that you are 60 and still have the drive to run a small business. You’re never to old to start I don’t think! Best of luck with your business.

  5. Bright

    Jul 2, 2016 at 7:42 pm

    great post Tim, since i’m still a student, i’ll try some of those tricks.
    Many thanks

    • Tim Denning

      Jul 3, 2016 at 7:34 pm

      Bright we are all students – students of life. Let me know how you go with implementing this knowledge in your life and thanks for reading.

  6. Asad Meah

    Jul 2, 2016 at 5:01 pm

    Excellent article Tim as always, very beneficial advice.

    • Tim Denning

      Jul 3, 2016 at 7:33 pm

      Asad thanks for the compliment and for taking the time to read it. Take care.

  7. Stephanie Figuerado

    Jun 30, 2016 at 2:07 pm

    Another great article Tim! I think some sort of spirituality should be taught in school also. My journey would have started a lot sooner if so, but i’m on it now and that’s all that matters!

    • Tim Denning

      Jun 30, 2016 at 8:19 pm

      Totally agree Stephanie. Thanks for reading.

  8. Charlene Rhinehart

    Jun 29, 2016 at 11:53 pm

    Great post!! It’s so important to never stop learning, growing, and becoming a better you everyday. I love your point about Public Speaking. This is a skill that is often overlooked but essential to advance in EVERY aspect of your life. I am a Toastaholic and fully support toastmasters. It is a game-changer for anyone who is trying to advance in their career or entrepreneurial pursuits. I just went to my club toastmaster meeting yesterday (after traveling the world for 6 months) and spoke about the importance of traveling. It reignited my fire and speaking goals. I can’t wait to see you deliver a Ted or Tedx Talk! That’s on my bucket list: )

    • Tim Denning

      Jun 30, 2016 at 1:36 am

      Thanks so much Charlene for your continued inspiring words! A Ted / Tedx talk would be awesome but I have a little way to go yet. Hope your travels were enjoyable!

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Success Advice

19 Success Mantras From Zig Ziglar to Help You Unleash Your True Potential

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Zig Ziglar quotes
Image Credit: Entrepreneur.com

There’s a good reason why Zig Ziglar is considered by many as the Godfather of motivation. Ziglar did not beat around the bush; he had a clear set of ideas, with easy to implement strategies coupled with powerful tonality and delivery that made him one of the best in the business.

The following is a collection of 19 success mantras from Ziglar that will inspire and motivate you to take the right action and unleash your greatest potential.

1. Create a very specific and detailed goal

“You need a plan to build a house. To build a life, it is even more important to have a plan or goal.” – Zig Ziglar

The first success mantra from Ziglar is to set specific goals, because goals help you focus.

Ziglar wants you to set following types of goals:

  • Big goals: Big goals are the type of goals that cause excitement and motivate you. If setbacks happen, focusing on these big goals will help push you forward.
  • Long range goals: These can include monthly and yearly goals.
  • Daily goals: Daily goals help you work consistently toward your long range goals.

Once your goals are in place, you can develop a plan on how to achieve them. Find out what obstacles you face, the skills you need to learn, and the people you need to meet in order to achieve your goals.

You don’t need to have everything figured out in the beginning. You can alter your goals and plans as you progress and as things become clear.

2. Visualize reaching your goals

If you want to reach your goal, you must see it, be able to smell, touch and taste it, know how it looks and what it feels like in your own mind.” – Zig Ziglar

Imagination (or seeing things using your mind’s eye) is the most powerful tool at your disposal. You can achieve miracles if you use this tool properly.

So take a few moments daily to relax, clear your mind and actually visualize yourself living the type of life you intend to live. See yourself with the nice things you want in your life such as owning a house or taking a vacation. While you are doing this, bring some emotion into your body to mimic the emotions you would feel when you actually achieve your dreams.

Visualizing this way helps change your attitude, removes limiting beliefs and reprograms your subconscious mind with positive, empowering beliefs, so you can move toward your goals faster.

3. Plan your day first thing in the morning

Every morning, run through your mind the things you are going to be doing. As you plan the day, as you think of all the things you have got to be excited about, it really does renew your energy.” – Zig Ziglar

A powerful tactic to ensure that you achieve your daily goals is to plan your day first thing in the morning. You can sit in silence and simply visualize all the things you are going to do today and how you are going to do it. As you visualize your day this way, you are filled with positive energy that will motivate you to utilize your time perfectly and take the right action.

4. Develop habits for success

Motivation gets you going and habit gets you there.” – Zig Ziglar

Ziglar is right in pointing out that, motivation doesn’t last forever, but habits once formed, last forever. As human beings, we are creatures of habit. Habit forming is difficult in the beginning, but it’s formed, you start doing it effortlessly.

In order to reach success, you need to substitute your bad habits with good ones. For instance, a good habit would be getting up early in the morning, planning your day, and working for 1 to 2 hours without giving into distractions. Remember that habits are formed once you repeatedly do something for 21 consecutive days.

5. Believe that you can

Before you can reach that goals, it is true that whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you are generally right.” – Zig Ziglar

If deep inside, you do not believe that you have what it takes to reach your goals, then you will never reach them. Therefore, it is crucial that you believe in your abilities and back yourself up to reach your goals. Whenever thoughts of self doubt arise, do not pay them any heed and instead shift your focus to empowering and uplifting thoughts of self belief.

6. Optimize your mind

Remember, you are what you are and where you are because of what’s going on in your mind. And you can change what you are and where you are by changing what goes into your mind.” – Zig Ziglar

As we grow up, we unconsciously imbibe a lot of negative and limiting beliefs from our surroundings. These beliefs unless discarded will hamper your growth, so become conscious of your limiting thoughts. Study these thoughts and figure out from where they arise.

In other words, what beliefs in your subconscious are responsible for them. Once you are aware of these beliefs, stop giving them power by consciously shifting your attention from the negative thoughts to positive and empowering thoughts. Using affirmations and positive self talk is also a great way to reprogram your subconscious mind.

7. Develop a positive self image

If you don’t see yourself as a winner, then you cannot perform as a winner.” – Zig Ziglar

How you perceive yourself in your mind’s eye is one of the most important factors that determines whether or not you will succeed.

If you think of yourself as someone who has what it takes to achieve success, you will achieve success, but if you think you are not good enough, you will see your reality reflecting that thought back to you. In-fact, your currently reality is reflective of the self image that you hold within.

Therefore, become conscious of the type of image you hold of yourself in your mind. Ask yourself these questions: How do I view myself? Do I think I am capable of reaching success? Do I believe that I deserve success? Do I see myself as a winner that everyone looks up to?

Simply becoming conscious of your self image can help you alter it from negative to positive.

8. Don’t worry about what others think of you

“Don’t be distracted by criticism. Remember ~ the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you.” – Zig Ziglar

People will always have something to say and you cannot please everyone. Don’t waste your time and energy worrying about other people’s actions and opinions. Keep your attention focused on your priorities because that’s what matters.

9. Learn from your mistakes

If you learn from defeat, you haven’t really lost.” – Zig Ziglar

It’s only human to make mistakes. The important thing therefore is to not dwell over your mistakes and instead, ask yourself, what your mistakes are trying to teach you. In doing so, learn from your mistakes, because they are the greatest factors for your personal growth.

10. Always be open to learning

Life is a classroom – only those who are willing to be lifelong learners will move to the head of the class.” – Zig Ziglar

The moment you think you know everything is the moment you stop growing. In order to succeed, you need to keep growing. Always keep an open mind, and always be open to learning. Do not become a slave to your beliefs, doctrines, and ideologies.

11. Practice delayed gratification

The chief cause of failure and unhappiness is trading what you want most for what you want right now.” –  Zig Ziglar

Studies prove that delayed gratification is a key factor toward achieving success. Make it a habit to not let distractions or short term pleasures take your focus away from achieving your long term pleasures and future rewards. The more you practice doing this, the stronger your self control becomes helping you achieve your long term goals faster.

12. Connect with yourself

Outside of your relationship with God, the most important relationship you can have is with yourself. We must be healthy internally, emotionally and spiritually – in order to create healthy relationships with others.” – Zig Ziglar

Spend time with yourself. Get to know and understand yourself by practicing self reflection. The more you know yourself, the more you get in touch with your true nature, desires, and goals. Similarly, only by knowing yourself can you begin to know others. Only by loving yourself can you start attracting the right people into your life. All of these characteristics are crucial for success.

13. Spend time in solitude

If you want to build a winning attitude, you need to take time to be quiet. And you need to do it at-least three to four times a week.” – Zig Ziglar

Ziglar is a major advocate of spending time in solitude. Spending time in solitude helps you reconnect with yourself. It also helps you clear your mind and attract life changing ideas. So make it a habit to spend time alone doing nothing. Spending even a few minutes with your own reflective thoughts can make a huge difference.

14. Surround yourself with uplifting people

Surround yourself with people who want the best for you and the people you love!” – Zig Ziglar

For the most part, people can be divided into two categories – the lilies and the leeches. The lilies are those who uplift you and leeches are those who drain you.

If you are surrounded by leeches all day long, they will suck your energy dry and you will find yourself feeling a lot less motivated and productive. Instead, when you surround yourself with good people, you will find yourself full of positive energy to take action.

So make a conscious effort to cut out toxic people from your life and surround yourself with people who inspire you to be yourself and who accept you for who you are.

15. Express gratitude

Of all the “attitudes” we can acquire, surely the attitude of gratitude is the most important and by far the most life changing.” – Zig Ziglar

Expressing gratitude changes your mindset from one of lack to one of abundance. When you feel abundance, you attract abundance into your life. Therefore, every day make it a point to feel gratitude for everything that you have in your life.

16. Value your time and use it effectively

If you don’t plan your time, someone else will help you waste it.” – Zig Ziglar

Use time as your most valuable resource. This is where planning your day can help you immensely. When you have a set plan in place, you will automatically learn to say no to things that are not productive.

17. Start slow and develop as you go

Peak performance is dependent on passion, grit, determination, and a willingness to do something poorly until you can do it well.” – Zig Ziglar

You don’t need to have everything figured out from the very beginning. It is also not important that you are an expert in your field of work from the very beginning. You can begin small with whatever you have and develop as you go along. Remember that it is the slow and steady that wins the race.

18. Do not compare yourself to others

Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself with others.” – Zig Ziglar

In order to reach your goals, it is important that you know your strengths and abilities. Focus on them instead of focusing on your weaknesses. When you compare yourself to others, you automatically start to see things that you lack and lose perspective. Get rid of the habit of comparing yourself to others, and keep your focus on yourself.

19. Be persistent

If you have the character to hang in there when its tough, you will develop or acquire every other characteristic necessary to WIN in the game of life.” – Zig Ziglar

And finally, the most important of all is to be persistent in your efforts even when the going gets tough.

Ziglar’s book, ‘See You At The Top’, was rejected 39 times before it was published in the year 1975. The book is still in print today and is considered an American classic. Goes to show what persistence can help you achieve. It does not matter how slow you are as long as you are persistent.

Which one of Zig Zaglar’s 19 success mantras resonated most with you and why? Share your thoughts below!

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Success Advice

4 Ways You Can Master Magnetic Confidence – Ashley Hann

Ashley Hann

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Ashley Hannawacker speaker and coach

What does confidence mean to you? For me, it is a deep, unshakable internal knowing of your value, your worth, what you bring to the world and who you really are. I believe that in order to experience our own greatness, we must first know it exists within ourselves. We must believe it in order to see it.

Once you have arrived at this deep knowing, you will be able to experience and exude your own personal magnetism. I define magnetic confidence as the ability to attract anything and everything that is in alignment with who you are and what you want, and repel everything that isn’t.

You become polarizing.

In this Addicted2Success podcast episode, Joel Brown asked me to break down four ways that you can master your own magnetic confidence so that you can create the results you want and live a life in alignment with who you are.

This is a postscript and addition to everything that was discussed in the episode. We hope you enjoy!

1. FACE THE UGLY: Shine Light On The Darkness

Everyone and their mom is talking about positivity and being positive. Now look, I’m all for positivity. I love it. However, what I am seeing is more and more people trying to be positive prematurely. They are painting over their pain with positivity. While this may work in the moment, the underlying issue is not being dealt with so it will keep resurfacing every time it is triggered. What we resist, persists. Plus, when we paint over, repress or sweep things under the rug, we are adding to the darkness within us because secrecy breeds shame.

The only way to overcome our darkness is to shine light on it. Don’t shove it down, hide it, repress it or judge it. See it, accept it and embrace it so that you can move through it.

Look, everyone has a dark side and a light side. This is what makes us human. We must learn to see the beauty in the contrast and channel our dark energy into light. The more we resist this darkness, the more it will build inside of us. We must embrace these parts of us so that we can transform our pain into our power.

2. F*^K WHAT PEOPLE THINK: You Do You, Boo

#FACT: People will judge you.

Ashley Hannawacker in Bali

The quicker you can make peace with the fact that judgement is inevitable, the less it’s going to affect you. The greatest leaders on this planet have judgers, nay-sayers and haters. And guess what? The reason they are great leaders is because they don’t let those judgements or the fear of judgement stop them.

I’m also going to challenge you on something. You ready for this?

It’s not the judgment you’re afraid of. You’re scared of what the judgements might mean about you. You’re making it mean things like “I’m not worthy”, “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not smart enough”, etc. Well, do you want to know the good news? You are in charge of the meaning! So why not make judgement mean something that actually forwards you? For me, I let the number of haters be a gauge of my success and how big of a game I’m playing. The more haters I have, the more I know I’m showing up unapologetically in my power and in my truth. This meaning I’ve created forwards me. What meaning can you create?

If you want to be confident, you must reinterpret and shift your relationship with judgement and haters in a way that empowers you. You must let the rude, mean comments drip off of your back like water. You’ve got to let it all push you forward instead of hold you back. Remember: magnetic confidence will make you polarizing. This means there will be people who don’t agree with you, dislike you, and may even hate you… and that’s more than O.K., that’s GREAT.

3. SHIFT THE STORY: Rewrite Your Stories, Rewire Your Mind

You are the sole, uncontested author of your life. You are not a victim. You haven’t been dealt a crappy deck of cards. You have actually been given a very precious gift called life where you have the ability to write your own story and create your own reality.

We are meaning-making machines. We create meanings and stories for just about everything that occurs in our lives. The question is, are the stories you are telling yourself empowering you or disempowering you?

When I find myself thinking something that’s draining my energy and doesn’t feel good, I’ll ask myself: “Can I 100% know that that’s true?” And if the answer is no, then I choose a different story that is also not 100% true, but that actually makes me feel good.

If you’re going to create a story, you might as well create one that feels good and empowers you!

In the episode, I go into a bit more detail on how to do this. I highly recommend you listen because this is a crucial part of becoming your most magnetically confident self.

Ashley Hannawacker Speaking

4. WATCH YOUR WORDS: Eliminate These From Your Vocabulary Now

It’s one thing to think something disempowering, it is another to actually say it out loud. When you think a thought out loud, you are giving energy to the thought. We must be deliberate and intentional about what we choose to give energy to. Your words become worlds!

Here are some words to eliminate from your vocabulary immediately:

  • “Can’t”
  • “Have to”
  • “Should”
  • “Hope”
  • “Try”

Listen to the full episode at the top of this article to understand why these words are detrimental to your confidence and success. You’ll also learn what you can replace them with that will actually fuel you and boost your self confidence.

If you enjoyed this episode and blog post or if you have anything to add, please leave a comment below.

RESOURCES:
Ashley Hann’s Website

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Success Advice

How to Be a Selfless Leader in Your Business

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leadership
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Leaders are required to make decisions daily that impact the success of the business and its bottom line. Understanding leadership training key terms can offer insight into core values and principles associated with leading people. Leadership training prepares leaders to recognize a variety of leadership styles prevalent in many organizations, the significance of communication, team building, and establishing a vision.

The following 6 key terms are important to building foundational skills in leadership:

1. Leadership style

Leadership style is the process of exploring the methods leaders use to approach guiding human capital in the workplace or on organized projects. It can encompass persuasive presentation skills that inspires trust, integrity, character, positive role modeling and other behaviors useful when working towards a goal.

2. Vision planning

According to leadership experts, a vision is an idealized picture or snapshot of the future, and vision planning is the ability to communicate core values and articulate a sense of direction by implementing a plan as it pertains to this vision. Organizational vision encompasses a strategic plan that generates motivational impact and leads employees to a specific outcome or shared desired goal.

“A great leader’s courage to fulfill his vision comes from passion, not position.” – John Maxwell

3. Team building

Team building is the method a leader chooses to empower a group of people using motivational strategies and guidance to accomplish a specific task. Effective team building must encompass an understanding of organizational culture and the dynamics of teamwork in order to exceed shared goals and objectives.

4. Communication

Communication is the ability to impart and exchange information through the process of listening, writing and speaking. Successful leaders understand that enhancing communication skills not only makes them more effective as leaders, but boosts the company’s success as well.

5. Performance evaluation

An important aspect of leadership training is determining whether the steps taken towards a goal are working. One of the many roles of a successful leader is to appraise or assess the effectiveness of both individual and collective workplace skills and strategies to achieve stated goals.

“A good objective of leadership is to help those who are doing poorly to do well and to help those who are doing well to do even better.” – Jim Rohn

6. Decision making

The term decision making is the process of choosing from several ideas or choices. It’s the practice of targeted determinations that can offer creative problem solving solutions. This is a vital skill in developing potential leaders because it strengthens the use of critical thinking and resourcefulness to make choices on behalf of the company.

How to be a selfless leader in your business organization

Many leaders try to play it safe when leading their business. In other words, they don’t really lead. They are afraid of taking risks and possibly making some people unhappy. It’s important to note that when you own a business, you may make decisions that won’t make everyone happy. Ideally, your culture will be set up so that what you do is transparent and enables people to speak up and share their concerns.

At the same time, people in an organization want their leaders to lead and part of that involves the leader making a passionate commitment to the direction the business needs to go in. When there isn’t clear leadership in a business, then the business is like a ship that is moving in a circle. It’s going nowhere.

A leader must always make it clear that what they are doing is actually serving the best interests of the business as opposed to their own best interests. If people in the organization think that a leader is abusing their position, it can create a toxic situation in the business bringing it down as people leave or sabotage the business.

A leader must be selfless, focused on what will truly benefit the business and the people in it. They must be willing to share the spotlight, instead of taking all the credit and must recognize the value of trusting the talents of the people they work with.

Recently, I was talking with a client of mine. He was having some personnel issues, and I suggested he carefully evaluate the talents of each person involved. After doing that, he made some changes in roles, and the people involved were much happier because they were doing the work that capitalized on their talents.

Throughout this process he was transparent and he made it clear that the changes he was making were for the benefit of the company. Each person involved saw that because the leader was honest and focused on the success of the business. He wasn’t making changes to make it easier for him, but rather making changes that would really help the business succeed. That’s the kind of leadership that is needed when a business undergoes changes or needs to focus on a specific direction.

What does being a selfless leader mean to you? How do you focus on the welfare of your business and show that to the people involved in the business? Share with us below!

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Success Advice

Things You Need to Know to Succeed as a Life Coach

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how to be a successful life coach
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Becoming a life coach is one of the biggest choices you will ever make. Your choice in this field will change how you treat your spouse, how you empathize with others, and how you manage your business.

When I decided to make life coaching my goal, I had many steps to take before I reached the finish line and I wasn’t quite sure how to motivate myself to get there. I know that I am not the only one who struggles with staying motivated. That’s why I’m sharing with you the secrets that helped me make my dreams a reality.

Dan Sullivan is the founder of The Strategic Coach, a company that helps entrepreneurs grow their businesses. Dan is often considered to be the number one entrepreneurship coach on the planet. If there is anyone who can motivate you to make your dreams a reality and go for gold – it’s him.

Here are the 2 life-changing ideas I learned about becoming a life coach:

1. Keep Selling Yourself

Don’t sell yourself short – but keep selling yourself on your future. Dan Sullivan suggests that the reason why we, as entrepreneurs, can’t focus on achieving our goals is that we haven’t actually sold ourselves on our project or endeavor. I believe this wholeheartedly. We may have listed our pros and cons, we have an ideal outcome, and we may even have a backup plan – but we haven’t truly committed to our goal.

In order to properly take advantage of an opportunity, we must be focused. There is no doubt that we live in a new age of multi-tasking. We watch videos while we respond to e-mails, we’re glued to our phones when we’re out on dates with our spouses – we even have the option to have two multi-tasking windows open on our smart devices so that we can do different things at the same time.

But studies show multitasking accomplishes less in the long-run. Multitasking reduces both our performance and efficiency. Dan suggests instead of trying to do everything at once, sell yourself on three tasks a day. The next day, sell yourself on three more. This will help you to have more focus and drive on what you are doing. You will accomplish more and feel better about fulfilling your goals.

2. The 3 Wins are Everything

Dan suggests that positive focus is everything when it comes to succeeding in business. That’s why he developed “The 3 Wins” mindset. After the day is done and you’re getting ready for bed, focus on three wins you had. By focusing on the three things you did right, you practice gratitude in your personal life. You set goals, reach them, and then celebrate them – no matter how small! This can help you have a more positive mindset going forward.

Dan Sullivan explains, “I would look at tomorrow… and I’d say, ‘Well these are gonna be my three biggest wins for tomorrow’. So, I would go to bed feeling good about the day, excited about the next day, and I would get up the next morning excited. So, then I would go out that day and try to have to three wins, but often times what happened is that I had wins that were bigger than the three I imagined the night before.”

The feeling of accomplishment is addictive. Not only does it feel great to get work done and accomplish our goals, but it encourages us to keep working hard in life. We work hard to grow our business, to maintain a healthy marriage, and to give our clients our best. By focusing on The 3 Wins, we view each day as a new opportunity to stay motivated and achieve something great.

How to Succeed in Becoming a Life Coach

Along with these life-changing ideas, here are some other great tips for anyone who is thinking of becoming a life coach.

1. Rapport is Essential

When you are becoming a life coach, you learn that your ability to have a rapport with your clients is just as important as the chemistry you felt with your spouse when you first started dating. Are you good at striking up a conversation? Do you have a knack for getting people to trust you or open up about their problems? If so, then you will be a natural at building your entrepreneurial business because your ability to connect with your clients is important.

2. Ask the Important Questions

As a life coach, it’s your job to ask the hard questions. This means that you must be intuitive about your client and really get to know and understand their thoughts and intentions. Only then can you help them reach their life goals.

3. Get Comfortable with Silence

Silence between two people can be the most uncomfortable, awkward, cringe-worthy experience, but as a life coach, it’s your job to let it happen anyway. When there is silence, your client will be eager to fill the void, which often leads them to show vulnerability and really work through their issues.

4. Don’t Take Things Personally

Your clients are not always going to gel with you. This may cause them to leave your services. Don’t take it personally. Alternatively, you may have a great rapport with your client, but that doesn’t always mean that they will take your advice. This can be frustrating for you, but don’t let it overwhelm you. Instead, look at it as an opportunity to continue building trust between you and your client.

You can make becoming a life coach a reality. Stay motivated by selling yourself on new ideas and strategies every day. It’s also beneficial to remind yourself of your three wins and always strive to keep growing and getting better. By becoming a life coach, you show people that you care, have an excellent rapport, and aren’t afraid of the hard questions – or the silence!

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