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Success Advice

10 Things Holding You Back And How to Take Control of Them



Image Credit: Unsplash

It’s no secret that we all have far more potential than we could ever imagine. Well, it may be a secret for some. Why is it then, that so many people never get where they want to go in life? Why do so many lack simply being able to visualize what they want their life to look like? It’s because they’ve been held down. We all have things holding us back to some degree and often we’re completely unaware of many of these things. The great thing about being human is that we have the ability to control our circumstances and create change, which is exactly how to break free of the shackles holding you back.

Here are 10 things that can hold you back and how to take back control from them:

1. Dependence

What is a tell-tale sign of someone who is not in control of their life? Dependence. Whether that be dependence on family, friends, or even the government, it is you and only you who is in control of your life. The sooner you realise this, the sooner you reclaim your independence and take back control.

2. Indecisiveness

How many times have you gone to a restaurant, only to be plagued by having to decide on ordering one of the one hundred items on the menu? If you’re like most, chances are you’ll take 15 minutes before making up your mind. Even then, you might still question your decision! 

The most successful people in the world make decisions fast. Develop your decision making muscles by being conscious every time you have to make one – think fast and trust your gut.

“The way to develop decisiveness is to start right where you are, with the very next question you face.” – Napoleon Hill

3. Friends & Family

Oftentimes it’s the thing we least suspect that’s holding us back the most. One of the biggest factors of people not succeeding is friends and family. Whether it be their own limiting beliefs, negativity or lack of belief in you, it is critical to distance yourself from anyone or anything that will bring you down. Sometimes you have to be ruthless about this, because you’d rather cut someone out of your life, than be stuck in the hamster wheel forever with them.

4. Lack of Discipline

Will Smith notably stated that “self-discipline is at the centre of any kind of material success in the world” – which I 100% believe to be true. Are you waking up on time? Are you exercising? Are you eating the right foods and going to bed on time? If the answer to any of them is no, then you’re holding yourself back. Fortunately, discipline is transferrable and by taking more control of discipline in one area of your life, you will be able to bring it across to others.

5. Your Phone

On average, people check their phones every 12 minutes, which is quite disturbing when you really think about it. Our phones are perhaps the greatest hindrance of them all, as we have them on us at almost all times.

The fastest and easiest way to take control of your phone usage is to set your intentions. Remind yourself to only use your phone for important tasks, and to turn it off when you don’t need it. The less time you waste on your phone, the more success you’ll be able to achieve.

6. Social Conditioning

Now this one isn’t really our fault – we are all conditioned by society and its expectations from a young age. As our journey of growth continues however, it is necessary to break free from the chains holding us down. It’s far too easy to fall back into these patterns of self-doubt and lack of self-worth that are imposed upon us, which is why it is vital to practice discipline in this area daily. Whether it be through affirmations, visualisation, or meditation, we must only feed our minds with information that will help us grow.  

7. Vices

If you’re a human being, then there’s a strong chance you have some kind of vice. Whether it be alcohol, binge watching TV, pornography or excessive eating. These are the things we know are bad, but they somehow continue to draw us in. We become addicted to the dopamine rush the vices provide us, except we’re usually left feeling down and depleted. 

I’m a big believer in removing anything in my environment that will hold me back. Whether that be turning the TV off at the power, blocking certain websites or not keeping bad foods in the house. Our willpower is limited, which is why we need to make it as easy as possible to steer clear of our vices.

8. Fear

Some of the biggest fears that most people experience fall into these three categories; fear of failure, fear of rejection and fear of embarrassment. I like to refer to fear as ‘False Evidence Appearing Real’, to which I analyse and make the choice to no longer acknowledge it as real. A great way to break out of certain fears is to remind yourself that one day, you will die – and all those decisions and things you did, or didn’t do, will no longer matter.

“You’ll always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” – Wayne Gretzky 

9. Lack of Awareness

Self-awareness is one of the biggest keys to happiness, purpose, and fulfillment. From my own personal experiences, I realised I lacked awareness for a long time – who I was, what I wanted to do, and what was possible for me. It wasn’t until I began to implement deep work on myself that I began to develop my self-awareness. This truly helped me regain control of my life and see exactly who I was along with who I wanted to be. 

See yourself from the outside, looking in. Take a step back and reflect upon your actions, who you are, and what you want to be. 

10. Perspective

Perception is reality, for some at least. Everything we experience in our own lives comes down to our perception of it. What often separates those who succeed from those who fail, is their perception. Some perceive failures as the be-all-end-all, while others see it as an opportunity to learn and know what to do next time. 

Viktor Frankl, a well-known survivor of the holocaust is someone who we can learn from. Frankl was able to control his perception of everything that was happening, allowing him to remain in as positive a frame of mind as you possibly could in the circumstances he faced.

Your mind is the most powerful thing on earth – and what life boils down to is just that. If you can control your mind, you control your circumstances. There is real power behind positive thinking. Refer back to these 10 tips if you are ever doubting yourself or simply aren’t sure what’s currently holding you back.

What’s currently holding you back in your life? Is there anyway we can be of service to you? Let us know below!

Lewis Schenk is an Australian based Entrepreneur, Writer and PR Consultant. His work has been recognized by Buzzfeed, International Business Times and Thrive Global. Lewis is passionate about sharing empowering stories from people around the world, particularly those in entrepreneurship & business. He has been privileged to work with over 150 business owners and entrepreneurs in 2020 alone, helping them grow their brand and online presence. His work can be found here.

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Success Advice

20 Ways You Can Become a Powerful Communicator



Emile Steenveld Speaker and Coach

Some people seem to naturally know how to effectively communicate in a group setting. They can express themselves clearly and listen attentively without dominating the conversation.

Being a powerful communicator is important for several reasons, including building and maintaining relationships, achieving goals, resolving conflicts, improving productivity, leading and influencing others, advancing in your career, expressing yourself more confidently and authentically, and improving your mental and emotional well-being. Effective communication is an essential life skill that can benefit you in all aspects of your life.

But, don’t worry if you don’t naturally possess this skill, as effective communication is something that can be developed with practice, planning and preparation.

1.  Listen actively: Practice active listening by giving your full attention to the speaker and responding to what they are saying.


2. Use “I” statements: Speak from your own perspective and avoid placing blame or making accusations.


3. Avoid assumptions: Don’t make assumptions about what the other person is thinking or feeling.


4. Be clear: Express your thoughts and feelings clearly and concisely by getting to the point and avoid using jargon or overly complex language.


5. Show empathy: Show that you understand and care about the other person’s feelings.


6. Offer valuable insights: When speaking in a group, provide a valuable takeaway or actionable item that people can walk away with.


7. Be an active listener: Listen attentively and respond accordingly, incorporating your points into the conversation.


8. Choose the right time: Pick the most opportune time to speak to ensure that you have the group’s attention and can deliver your message without interruption.


9. Be the unifying voice: Step in and unify the group’s thoughts to calm down the discussion and insert your point effectively.


10. Keep responses concise: Keep responses short and to the point to show respect for others’ time.


11. Avoid unnecessary comments: Avoid commenting on everything and only speak when you have something important to say.


12. Cut the fluff: Avoid being long-winded and get straight to the point.


13. Prepare ahead of time: Sort out your points and practice them before speaking in a group.


14. Smile and be positive: Smile and nod along as others speak, to build a positive relationship and be respected when it’s your turn to speak.


15. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your own actions and feelings.


16. Ask questions: Ask questions to clarify any confusion or misunderstandings.


17. Avoid interrupting: Allow the other person to finish speaking without interruption.


18. Practice active listening: Repeat what the other person said to ensure you have understood correctly.


19. Use your body language too: Use nonverbal cues such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language to convey your message and build rapport.


20. Be aware of the tone of your voice: it should be calm and assertive, not aggressive or passive.


By keeping these tips in mind, you can improve your communication skills and become a more powerful communicator, which can help you build better relationships, achieve your goals, and lead a more fulfilling life.

I you want to learn how to become more confident in life then you can join my weekly mentorship calls and 40+ online workshops at so you can master your life with more success.

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Dead Men Tell No Tales: How to Navigate a Mutiny as a Leader in 10 Steps

You’re the manager. You’re the supervisor. You’re the leader. But maybe your people don’t see it that way



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You’re the manager. You’re the supervisor. You’re the leader. But maybe your people don’t see it that way and perhaps that has created a divisive and adversarial working environment that makes it difficult for you to influence and inspire your team in a way that meets your vision. (more…)

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How to Think Like a CEO for Your Future Success

A blueprint for CEOs to draw a disciplined strategy



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Strategic thinking helps CEOs build successful businesses. It helps them establish everlasting enterprises. It is one of the key elements of decision-making. It is different from strategic leadership. It differentiates between leaders from managers.  (more…)

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How to Focus Your Mind on Your Goals in 2023 Constructively

In this world of distractions due to information overload, it has become a big challenge to focus our minds



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In this world of distractions due to information overload, it has become a big challenge to focus our minds on positive aspects and constructive activities. Sometimes we waste our precious time mentally and physically due to distractions arising out of technology. We must understand our priorities and learn how to focus on them religiously. (more…)

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