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Motivation

To Anyone Who’s Not Doing So Well

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Someone close to me is not doing so well. She’s dealing with fear, anxiety and depression all at the same time. Her predicament is my inspiration.

It’s my duty not to sit back and ignore someone who really needs help. That help can’t always be given directly though. Sometimes that help needs to come in a different form. Sometimes the words that need to be said can’t be said in person.

We can’t sit back and ignore people who are going through a rough time (that’s how suicide can occur).

Instead, we need to be the light in someone else’s darkness. That’s why this blog post is for this very special person, who has no idea who she has already inspired and will continue to inspire. I’ve had my own fair share of struggles over the last year and so I know exactly how she is feeling.

When you’re not doing so well remember the following:

A) Don’t hide from the world

It’s so easy to disappear and hide in the shadows when you’re not doing so well. Your bed feels so warm and coffee tastes amazing. Hiding won’t help the horrible feelings you are going through. By avoiding the pain you are feeling, you only create more for yourself.

This process becomes a vicious cycle that you feel like you can’t escape. The very thing you need during these tough times are your friends, family and work colleagues. Tell them how you are feeling. Don’t bottle it up. The more your inner circle knows of your struggle, the more they can help.

You’ve done the same for them so now it’s time to let them help with your healing process. Start by being honest about where you are at. Talk the issues through with people you trust. You’ll find through this process that most of what is going on in your head is based on fear.

“Your fear is there to protect you from danger, but not to help you rediscover yourself. It’s okay not to be okay. Embrace that truth and let it set you free”

B) Your reason for existence can come into question

Through these challenging times every day can feel kind of meaningless. The worst thing you can have happen to your life is to lose your sense of meaning. Your meaning is what keeps you moving forward and it’s what will be the antidote to your pain.

Try reconnecting with what inspires you and what has gotten you to where you are today. Maybe that’s your religion, your graphic design ability, your love of art or even your thirst for travel. Don’t ever forget why you are put on this Earth because that very thought can potentially end all of your happiness.

I’ve questioned the meaning of my life on many occasions and it always comes back to the same thing: I’m here to inspire people – like everyone reading this article – to think differently and question their own thoughts.

I’m here to tell you that it’s all going to be okay and our problems are the same for all of us. These problems just show up in the form of different flavors, but they are all part of the same soup.

C) The world’s beauty can be lost on you

What you need to do is get out into this beautiful world. The trouble is that when you’re not doing so well, you forget where you are right now at this point in time. Let me remind you in case you’ve forgotten. You are living on the most beautiful planet in the entire solar system.

You were chosen to come to life out of thousands of little sperm. You live in a place where there is glorious sun, phenomenal winters full of snow and during a time when technology has taken our lives to a new level. You can literally be whoever you want to be at this moment.

Today you might be a comedian and tomorrow you might be an Internet sensation. Everything in your life is your choice because you are free. Free to dream. Free to love. Free to be free. Free yourself from this brief moment of negativity.

Get back on the horse and try again. All anyone ever wanted for you is to be happy, it’s just that you don’t know that. Live like a kid again and take pride in the small things that you once didn’t notice. Smell the flowers in the park, jump in the puddles, pull a stupid face and have a warm cup of tea.

D) There’s someone that cares for you

“The suffering begins when you think you’re alone. You’re not”

Someone, somewhere cares about you. Heck, I care about you and that’s why I wrote this article. No one wants you to go through hard times, but it’s during these moments that you get a chance to reflect. You get an opportunity to rebuild your life and find something new.

Don’t lie to yourself because you and I know that you’re not alone. You don’t live on Mars, in some dark hole, where life is mostly inhabitable. You’re here on Earth surrounded by people that care about you even though they may not all tell you.

It’s simple to overcome this dilemma though. Just ask these people if they care about you and you’ll see that I am right.

E) Today was a good day

You thought you weren’t doing so well yet you made it through this article. And guess what? You made it through today as well. It was not easy, but you did it. So if you can make it through today then why can’t you make it through tomorrow as well?

The answer is you can. You can make it through every single day when you take the focus off your suffering and get out there and help people in some meaningful way. That’s what we’re all good at after all. We are all excellent at being of service, so why not do that as a part of the healing process.

The first thing I do when I’m going through what you’re going through is volunteer at the homeless shelter. Try that or pick something that takes you out of your head.

Even though you may have felt sad today, the sun still came up. Your friends still sent you flowers, messages and comforted you. Don’t become dependent on these gifts, but use them. As you get through enough of these days, you build muscle you never thought you’d have.

This muscle can be used next time the dark clouds in your life appear. Better yet, this new muscle can be put to good use and given to someone in your life who may need it when you’re all better again.

Don’t forget that today was a good day for the only reason that you made it through it. You survived. We’re all survivors and we can get through today if we put all of our focus on doing so. Take it one day at a time and each day will be just a little bit easier.

Repeat after me “Today was a good day. Tomorrow’s going to be even better.”

Say it again. Repeat over and over until you know this phrase to be true. Best of luck soldier. My thoughts are with you and you’ll get through these difficult times.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship.You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

Motivation

How Positive Self-Talk Boosts Motivation and Productivity

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positive self talk
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“I’m a born failure. There is no way I can get that job. I can’t carry that dress off – I’m too fat. Why do these things happen to me? Why am I so unlucky?” Are your conversations with yourself along these lines? Do you find yourself reprimanding yourself every time you make a mistake or wallowing in self-pity? (more…)

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Motivation

Money Making a Difference – Examples of Billionaires Using Their Money for Good

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How billionaires use their money
Image Credit: Tony Hsieh

How many times have we wished to be in the shoes of a billionaire? People often daydream of having a ten digit bank account, and what they’d be doing with it. In an instant, we’d picture luxury yachts, extravagant sports cars, the finest wine and jewellery, and a whole lot of things which are difficult to pronounce. It is truly difficult to separate wealth and luxury. (more…)

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Motivation

6 Lessons You Can Learn from The King of the Jungle

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lessons you can learn from a lion
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Do you watch documentaries on lions? If yes, then you must have seen that they dominate their territory and are apex predators. Lions are among the strongest animals in the world, and no one dares to confront or challenge them. They are called ‘kings’ because they have a touch of royalty in everything they do. From eating habits where 20-25 royal members dine at the same to conquering huge lands. A lion always has a bold attitude and lives like a true ruler. (more…)

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Motivation

The Guide to Staying Motivated While Working Alone

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how to stay motivated when working alone
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Working alone at home might sound like a nightmare to some, but as a fully signed up introvert, working alone at home is an absolute dream. No energy-draining small talk, no noisy distractions, just peace and quiet to complete deep and focused work. Well not quite. Working alone at home has more challenges than you might expect. Boredom, lack of focus and lack of motivation to name a few.

When you start working for yourself, you quickly realise that one of the biggest problems you face isn’t the job itself. Maintaining your motivation poses a potentially huge difficulty. Much of that difficulty stems from working alone, rather than in a traditional office setting. There is also the challenge of staying focused on the task at hand. With no boss or supervisor looking over your shoulder, social media can distract or cat videos interrupt you.

But the greatest problem by far is a simple lack of motivation. There doesn’t seem to be a pressing need to finish this project right now, making it far too easy to put it off until later. Left unchecked, a lack of motivation can cripple the work you are trying to accomplish. Over the past few years I’ve developed a few go-to tactics to improve my lone working motivation.

Here are some of the tools I’ve used to stay motivated and on-task.

These first few tips focus on using different tweaks in your personal work schedule to provide some variety and maintain your focus.

1. Include short breaks

My eye doctor once told me that for every 20 minutes of staring at a computer screen, you should look away and focus on something across the room for 20 seconds. This gives your eyes a chance to reset. Do something similar with the rest of your body; don’t just look across the room, walk, jog, or run across the room. Give your body a break, and try to reset your thoughts. If you don’t have the discipline to take regular breaks, use an app to remind you.

2. Block out an afternoon for social activities and networking

Set aside one afternoon a week for your social life. Friday afternoon works best for me. If you feel guilty about not working, think of it as a chance to network. Either way, be sure to spend this section of time with other people. Socialise and network.

3. View your personal schedule as your work schedule

A 9-to-5 job requires getting up every morning, preparing for the day, leaving the house, and commuting to your workplace. In other words, it requires going to work. You want to recreate the same rhythm at home. You may not actually need to leave your house in order to work, but try to stick with the schedule. Filling the old job timeslot with your new work helps to keep you motivated – you can’t clock out early!

These next few tips are little things you can do to trick yourself into staying focused!

1. Music

This tip may sound cliché, but try listening to an upbeat song loudly whenever you feel unmotivated. It’s a simple trick, but a surprisingly effective one!

2. Have somewhere else to work for a change of scenery

When procrastination sets in, sometimes a quick change of scenery is all you need. If you work at home, going to your favourite café can be a huge help. Other freelancers I know have even gone so far as to hire office space outside the home, and rotate between the two to help stay on-task.

3. Love what you do

This is arguably the most critical point on the whole list. If you don’t love what you do, it will be hard to keep yourself motivated – particularly long-term. Sure, you may be able to push on through sheer force of will for a while, but sooner or later you’ll lose motivation entirely. Do something you genuinely enjoy, and you’ll find it much easier to stick with it for the long haul.

These last few tips are Industry-related!

1. Make sure you have fun projects

Not all of your work projects will be fun, but fight to make at least a couple of them fun. These might even be personal side projects, not particularly related to your main job. Or they might be in the same general field, but not your specific focus.

2. Attend industry events a couple of times a year

Nearly every imaginable industry has an organising body of some kind. Find the local branch, and use it to keep tabs on industry-related events. Attend some seminars, network, and maybe even glean some new tips and tricks from industry insiders.

3. Schedule at least one call a week to learn something within your industry

View this as an opportunity for personal development. At least once a week, try to learn something new about your industry. For me, this might mean calling a new tool provider to demonstrate their gadgets. Whatever your industry, try to expand your horizons a little bit every week. You’ll learn new methods and make new connections at the same time.

These tips worked for me, hopefully, some of them will help you out as well. Above all, strive to enjoy what you do, stick to a “work schedule,” and look for opportunities for constant self-improvement. With those ideas in mind, you’ll find staying motivated much easier to do alone or in a group!

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