Never give up on your dream.
Never give up on romance.
Never give up on yourself.
Most of all, never give up on life.
The answer for how to never give up is to have a purpose greater than you. The challenge with your must-have goal is that if it only inspires you, you’ll lose momentum eventually.
What happened to me?
This last year I’ve wanted to give up too just like how you’ve wanted to either right now or in the past. It’s not easy trying to motivate yourself all the time. There are things that can help, but rather than write you a long shopping list of tools to use, simply try personal development.
Personal development is where the magic lies. It will assist you to never give up. In the last year, I wanted to give up because:
– My romance pursuits failed
– My dream became a lot harder than I thought
– It felt easier to give up and take the easy road rather than keep myself going
The past comes back to haunt me
Then I had another experience recently. A bunch of people I hadn’t spoken to for a long time came out of the woodwork so to speak. They had one mission: to prove I was a fraud and was doing all of this to show people how I was an immaculate conception and have never failed.
I thought I would block them from contacting me. It didn’t work as they used their friend’s social media accounts. I then deleted their comments and thought I could erase them from my life. Kind of how those “Get Rid Of Your Toxic Friends” articles suggest you go cold turkey.
Didn’t work. Then I started questioning myself. Maybe these people are right. They have known me for a long time. Maybe part of what they are saying is true. I then took a cocktail of ‘Wake The Hell Up Tim” and looked at what they were saying.
“Each time these negative people wrote a comment on my social media posts, there were ten times more positive comments on the exact same post”
People were asking how they could join what I was doing. People were inspired. I got a bunch of messages from people I hadn’t spoken to in a while.
It still felt horrible because these negative people were sleeping dogs and then all of a sudden woke up and wanted their revenge all over again. The only way they would disappear would be to stop what I was doing and let them win.
Hopefully, you know me well enough by now to know that’s never going to happen. I’m never going to stop doing what I do and once I woke up from the madness, I reminded myself of that.
What stopped me from giving up?
I didn’t give up on life. There were aspects of my life over the past year that were not the way I wanted including this story of nasty haters above. What kept me going was the belief that while not all pieces of my life were perfect, overall, things were working out.
I conditioned myself to believe that to give up on life in general and settle for mediocrity was the same as accepting that it was time to die. When you give up on life, you are ending any chance of success you may have ever had.
While your physical body will live on, once you give up on life, your existence becomes pointless.
The meaning of life
When your existence becomes pointless and you give up on life, you also give up the meaning of your life. This may not sound like a big deal initially. That’s until you think about this properly. The one thing that all humans are chasing is the meaning of their life.
“We cannot exist without a meaning for our life. We cannot function without a meaning for our life”
I haven’t always had a meaning for my life and you may be the same right now. As long as you keep looking for it though, you can still live a purposeful existence. I found my meaning for life in the darkest place possible.
It was only after losing what I thought was everything, did I find out how much I already had. I then used what I had to inspire the world through entrepreneurship and personal development. This purpose also became the meaning of my existence.
What happens now when I want to give up?
Now when I want to give up, I have a reason to go on. There is something that is more powerful than me that feeds the human souls I serve. For me, to give up on life would be the equivalent of taking away the very food these humans rely on to survive. My purpose has become bigger than me.
So that’s the answer ladies and gentlemen. When you feel like giving up, you need to revert to why you’re here in the first place. If you haven’t got to this level yet, then you need to keep wanting and trying to understand why you are here. That search will keep you going and stop you from giving up.
Don’t let this negative world beat you down. There are people that will stand in your way and tell you that you are going to fail. The truth is these people want you to fail because of their own inadequacies and fears about their life.
Don’t let the feces of someone else’s life come and clog up your own purpose’s plumbing. You are so much more than you will ever understand. Believing in you, and believing in the power for your life to mean something to the world is where you should focus your thinking.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
How to Stay Motivated to Achieve Your Goals
Time is the raw material of our lives. How we choose to spend it, shapes our life accordingly. So having the motivation to spend it on achieving goals is crucial to creating a life we want.
What is Motivation?
The Oxford dictionary defines motivation as the desire or willingness to do something – our drive to take action.
Scientifically, motivation has its roots in the dopamine pathways of our brains. When we do something that feels good, that’s dopamine kicking in. Our actions are driven by the desire for that reward (the good feeling).
Author Steven Pressfield describes motivation more practically. He says we hit a point where the pain of not doing something becomes greater than the pain of doing it. He sees motivation as crossing the threshold where it’s easier to take action than it is to be idle. Like choosing to feel awkward while making sales calls over feeling disappointed about a diminishing bank account.
However you choose to think about it, we all want to harness motivation to achieve our goals.
How to Get Motivated
James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, says that most people misunderstand motivation. They think that motivation is what gets us to take action. In reality, motivation is often the result of action, not the cause of it. Once we start a task, it’s easier to continue making progress. Like Isaac Newton’s first law: objects in motion stay in motion.
This means most of the resistance when working on your goals comes right before we start. Since motivation naturally occurs after we start, we need to focus on making starting easier.
4 Ways to Make Starting Easier
1. Schedule it
One reason people can’t get started on things is that they haven’t planned when to do it.
When things aren’t scheduled it’s easier for them to fall by the wayside. You’ll end up hoping motivation falls in your lap or hoping that you’ll muster enough willpower to get it done.
An article in the Guardian said, “If you waste resources trying to decide when or where to work, you’ll impede your capacity to do the work.”
2. Measure something
It’s easy to feel uninspired when you don’t know if you’re making progress or what you’re even working towards. That’s why you need to make your success measurable in some way. Starting is easy when you know exactly how much closer your current actions will bring you to achieving your goal.
3. Extrinsic motivation
This type of motivation is from external factors. It can be either positive or negative. Positive motivation consists of incentives like money, prizes, and grades. Negative motivation consists of deterrents like being fired, having a fight, or being fined. Extrinsic motivation doesn’t work effectively long-term, but it can work well in the short term to get you started on something.
4. Make it public
Keep yourself accountable by telling friends and family your goals, or even sharing them on social media. This makes it easier to start something because you’re pressured to not let others down.
How to Stay Motivated Long Term
When we say we want to feel motivated to do something, we don’t want to be pushed or guilted into doing a task. We want to be so attracted and drawn to the idea that we can’t resist not taking action. That’s why it’s important to build a foundation that will set you up for consistency.
These are 5 techniques that will help you do just that:
1. Stay in your goldilocks zone
The goldilocks zone is when a task is the perfect level of difficulty—not too hard and not too easy. In this zone, we reach peak motivation and focus.
For example, let’s say you’re playing a serious tennis match against a 4-year-old. On this level of difficulty, you’ll quickly become bored and not want to play. Now let’s say you’re playing a serious tennis match against Serena Williams. On this level of difficulty, you’ll quickly become demotivated because the match is too challenging.
The Goldilocks zone is in the middle of that spectrum. You want to face someone with equal skill as you. That way you have a chance to win, but you have to focus and try for it. Adjusting your workload and goals over time to stay within your Goldilocks zone keeps you engaged and motivated long-term.
2. Pursue intrinsically motivated goals
Being intrinsically motivated to achieve a goal is when you want to achieve it for what it is. There are no external factors like a reward or the risk of being fired. The drive behind your actions is coming from within.
For most intrinsic goals we pursue them because they will enrich our lives or bring us closer to fulfillment. That makes these goals extremely sustainable long-term because they directly affect our quality of life and the things we care about.
3. Use “chunking”
Chunking is the technique of breaking down a goal into smaller short-term targets. By doing this you achieve multiple successes in your pursuit of the main goal. This triggers the brain’s reward system and drives you to keep going.
Traditionally, you may set a goal that you expect to achieve in one year. That’s a long time to commit without seeing any results along the way. By chunking your goals into monthly or quarterly targets, you get the consistent positive reinforcement you need to stay motivated long-term.
For example, instead of trying to lose 50 pounds in one year, try to lose 4 pounds every month for 12 months.
4. Be flexible
We’re all victims of circumstance. Things happen along our journey that we can either adjust to or quit because of. That’s why it’s important to have leeway and flexibility when you’re pursuing a goal. If you expect everything to go perfectly, the inevitable failure can make you disengaged and desireless. When you plan for things to go wrong, you make sure you can keep up for the long haul.
5. Pursue your goals in a sustainable fashion
Don’t lose hope when you’re not an overnight success. Overnight successes are the 1%—for the most part, they don’t exist. What we see as an “overnight success” is actually countless hours of work behind the scenes finally hitting a tipping point. Pursuing goals is a story of patience, persistence, and unseen effort.
Don’t compare yourself to others. Comparison is a recipe for a drop in self-confidence and satisfaction. It also cultivates a mindset where you think you haven’t done enough. As a result, you may raise your expectations and put more pressure on yourself.
This is pointless because things worth achieving take time. So we obviously won’t compare to the things around us when starting.
Mastering motivation is a superpower. With that ability at your fingertips, you can accomplish your goals and shape a life you want to live in.
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