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Change Your Mindset

3 Harsh Life Lessons That’ll Make You a Better Person

Despite the many adversities you’ll experience, remember that with such challenges comes opportunity



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Life is incredible; it’s brimming with unique experiences and opportunities for those willing to take risks. However, every coin has its opposing side. And the world we live in is no different. As much as the world offers growth and possibilities, it equally distributes difficulties and challenges—not to think so is naive.

But, with the proper perspective, even these “negatives” can be converted into positives and, as a result, make you better instead of bitter. Here are three harsh life lessons that will make you a better person. 

1. Suffering is Part of the Human Condition

In everything we do, we’re either trying to gain pleasure or avoid pain; the irony is that pain is an inescapable part of the human experience. It’s as fixed in the human condition as the stars are in the sky. For this reason, accepting (and even embracing) it as inevitable helps you manage it better. 

Here are a few tips for embracing suffering:

  • Do something hard every day: This could be as harsh as daily cold showers or as simple as taking the stairs instead of the elevator. Whatever you choose, try to incorporate hardship into your daily life; it will make you tougher and more resilient.
  • Don’t self-meditate: Negative emotions are not pleasurable. But the worst thing you can do when you feel sad, anxious, depressed, etc., is self-medicate via drugs, food, alcohol, or other mind-altering substances.
  • Be present: Feel your negative emotions; be present with them. Granted, this is easier said than done. However, if you become comfortable with uncomfortable emotions, you will develop mental strength when real challenges or setbacks occur. 

Why Suffering Makes You Better 

Life can be harsh; it’s filled with challenges and difficulties. You’ll be washed away under the current of adversity if you aren’t strong enough to handle the tide. Suffering develops strength within you. Ultramarathon runner, triathlete, author and retired Navy SEAL David Goggins refers to this as ‘callusing your mind.’

Suffering makes you stronger, so you can better manage life’s challenges. From this perspective, you’ll recognize that suffering is a necessary part of becoming all you can be.

“The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he cannot learn, feel change, grow or live…” — William Arthur Ward

2. Everything is Temporary

Everyone alive is going to die someday. 

Everything you and I build will eventually crumble and become dust; nothing is permanent. Don’t take this as a negative aspect of life. On the contrary, it’s the perfect reason not to take yourself or life too seriously. We’re all dust in the wind! So you might as well live as fully as possible and enjoy your brief time here!

Try these tips to enjoy your life more:

  1. Set lofty goals and make progress toward them
  2. Don’t take things too personally
  3. Maintain connections with those who love and care about you (and vice versa)
  4. Don’t compromise your values
  5. Take chances in your life
  6. Try not to judge yourself too harshly when you make mistakes
  7. Try not to judge others too harshly when they make mistakes (we’re all doing the best we can)

How Will Knowing This Make You a Better Person?

Understanding that everything (and everyone) you know is only here for a short time may seem depressing or nihilistic. But this knowledge can actually help you enjoy what you have while you have it. It can free you from taking things and people for granted. As a result, you can enjoy your life much more deeply than you ever could otherwise. 

3. We All Have a Dark Side

In his international bestseller, The Laws of Human Nature, author Robert Greene dives deep into this concept. His book explains that every human (regardless of how “saintly” they appear) has a dark side. And underneath people’s “kind” or “polite” demeanor resides a dark personality fraught with aggression, insecurities, and self-serving compulsions they actively hide from others. Even more concerning, this dark side seeks expression. And it often seeps out in actions that will confuse or even inflict pain on you. 

20th-century philosopher and psychologist Carl Jung referred to this ugly aspect of human nature as The Shadow. 

Why Understanding This Concept Will Improve Your Life

By recognizing The Shadow in others, you can avoid naivety and protect yourself against malicious people. Better yet, by recognizing it in yourself, you can integrate it into your personality. This process makes you a more “complete” person, allowing you to accept the “ugly” parts of you that you’re either consciously or unconsciously trying to repress. 

Failure to integrate your dark side causes it to seek expression through your behavior in unexpected ways. But benefits to shadow work can include:

  1. Improved creativity
  2. More confidence 
  3. Higher levels of self-esteem
  4. Undiscovered talents/skills
  5. Self-love, acceptance, and respect
  6. Increased personal integrity 

There are many therapeutic services available to help with shadow work if you want to learn more.

Despite the many adversities you’ll experience, remember that with such challenges comes opportunity. Each tribulation helps you to grow and become more. And when you become more, more of life opens up to you, allowing you to enjoy and experience a broader range of what the world offers. 

Alex Brown is a self-improvement writer who specializes in health & fitness, goal setting, self-discipline, and high-quality living. His work draws from his personal experiences in self-improvement and goal achievement and encompasses how to become the best version of yourself.

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Change Your Mindset

4 Tips On How To Write Down Your Goals To Actually Reach Them



4 Tips to Writing Down Your Goals Effectively

Everyone has goals. Whether small (“I’d like to lose 5 pounds before the summer”) or big (“I’d like to make a million dollars next year”). 

There’s a huge gap between having goals and accomplishing them. The act of writing down your goals plays an important part in closing this gap and reaching your goals.  According to a study done on Harvard MBA students, within ten years’ time, the students who had written down their goals were making ten times as much as their classmates who hadn’t written down their goals.

What to write out in your goals 

1. Clearly define your goals

This may be harder than you think. That’s because oftentimes, we get caught up in our daily routines and lose track of our true desires in life. Most people are guided by their circumstances. But there are a few people who shape their lives according to their goals. Who do you think is happier: the person who is defined by their circumstances or the person who creates their circumstances? Which category are you in now? Which category do you want to be in?

Chances are, you’re in the first group. But, the good news is that if you’re reading this article, you’re probably trying to make it to the second category. In order to do this, you have to take stock of your situation. That means taking some time to sit down and reflect. Find some quiet, alone time. Sit down and consider your current situation from all angles and write down your observations.

If you need some help doing this, consider answering the following questions:

  • Where are you now?
  • Where do you want to be?
  • What do you have to do to get there?

“It is not enough to take steps which may some day lead to a goal; each step must be itself a goal and a step likewise.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

2. Look at the big picture

Envision where you want to be next year, the year after or five years from now. Think about long-term goals. Don’t think about details or how you will accomplish them. Simply allow yourself to dream and to think about what it is you truly want. Whether it’s a personal or professional goal, just let your heart speak. Maybe you want to be married with children in five years’ time. Maybe you want to run a marathon. Or you want a job that you both love and that pays you well. Or you want to take time off to travel. Whatever it is, no matter how far from your current circumstances it may be, write it down.


3. Look at the small picture

Now, is when you start to fill in the gap between where you are now and your dreams. What is the first step? If you want to be married and have children, fill out a profile on an online dating site or let your friends know that you’re interested in meeting someone. If you want to run a marathon, get yourself a personal trainer at a gym or join a running club. Maybe visit a sports nutritionist to make sure you’re getting the nutrients you need in order to stay healthy and competitive.

If you want to land your dream job, think about your qualifications. Do you need to take some courses in order to be a candidate for the job you want? If you already qualify, start sending out your resume. If you want to travel, how could you convince your boss to let you take the time off? What about arrangements for a house-sitter or sub-letter? Who could take care of your pets? What other steps are there between you and your goal? Map them out, step by step.


4. Use positive Self Talk

When writing down your goals, try to put things in a positive way. Negative goal setting implies that you’re doing something wrong. It’s like scolding yourself for not doing better.

Below, I will provide 4 examples:

  • Don’t say: Stop dating losersInstead say: Find a successful, loving, supportive partner.
  • Don’t say: Stop being lazyInstead say: Improve my fitness to have the body I want and increase my health, energy and self-esteem.
  • Don’t say: Quit your dead-end jobInstead say: Find a job that matches my skills, passions and financial goals.
  • Don’t say: Stop putting off traveling. Instead say: Prepare the way for an incredible traveling adventure.

Putting a positive spin on the language you use can make you feel excited about tackling your goals. Such an attitude will help you overcome hurdles and make you determined to reach your future accomplishments.

“A goal is a dream with a deadline.” – Napoleon Hill

Whatever your goals are, studies show that the act of writing them down can have a significant impact on their outcome. Defining exactly what it is that you want, setting up the steps to get there, and saying it all in a positive way are powerful steps to realizing your dreams. So, grab a pen and get started.

Ready To Write Down Your Goals & Reach Them? Read more blogs about reaching your goals and success on Addicted 2 Success

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Change Your Mindset

Need Help Reaching Your Goals? This 6 Step Process Is For You



how to reach your goals
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Nobody wants to fail and everyone wants to succeed. Every day, people are struggling to reach their goals and achieve success. A failure is a painful event and one that almost all of us work tirelessly to avoid. However, no matter who you are, failure is unavoidable. Not only that, but as much as you hate to fail, failure is still necessary for your success. There can be no success without failure. (more…)

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Don’t Forget the Hard Times Embrace Them to Grow

A dream may never become a reality if you fail to learn from what made it impossible in your past



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A dream may never become a reality if you fail to learn from what made it impossible in your past. Each trial I have faced strengthened me, increased my confidence, and instilled in me the discipline to seek accountability for my life.  (more…)

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Change Your Mindset

5 Ways To Achieve Your Goals (With Examples)



Accomplishing mountians

Setting goals is a crucial first step, whether you’re striving to reach personal or professional milestones. However, achieving those goals requires planning, determination, and focus. In this post, we’ll discuss five actionable strategies that can help you achieve your goals in 2023, and we’ll provide real-life examples to inspire and motivate you. By implementing these tips, you can train your brain to achieve your goals and make meaningful progress toward your aspirations.

1. Write Down Your Goals

The first thing needed to achieve a goal is to have one. A goal becomes very clear and precise once you have written it down most simply and easily to remember.

Here are some examples:

  • I am the world’s best dancer!
  • I am the greatest athlete!
  • I have created the world’s most innovative tech company!

They are all written with the belief that these things have already happened. Once you start believing it has already happened, other people too can sense your confidence and things start happening.

“If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy and inspires your hopes.” — Andrew Carnegie

2. The One Page Plan

A simple one-page plan to accompany your goal is much more powerful than a detailed 30-page plan. After you have written your clear goal – write down all the things you will have to do to achieve it. Make it as simple and direct as possible so that you can refer to it every day and take action. A simple plan is easier to follow and keep up with.

3. Get The Right Skills

Once you have a clear goal that has been inked into your mind, and a clear plan in place, it is very important to invest in the skills you need to achieve your goal.

So for example, if you want to become a movie star, you should immediately start developing your acting skills. Observe how other actors perform, join an acting class, read about acting, and most importantly, start honing your craft by joining a local theatre group and going for as many auditions as you can. Practice is very important for mastering any skill.

Struggling To Achieve Your Goals? Here Are 9 Possible Reasons Why! 

4. Surround Yourself With The Best People

The best way to achieve our goals is to make sure we have the best people supporting us. People who succeed are always those who understand the power of people.

So let’s say your goal is to be an entrepreneur and you have developed your entrepreneurial skills, the next step would be to get the best people to join your team to help you achieve your goal. These would be people who you consider to be the best marketers capable of getting you the best customers and investors.

Once you have the best people supporting you, it becomes much easier and faster to achieve your goals.

“It takes tremendous discipline to control the influence, the power you have over other people’s lives.” – Clint Eastwood

5. Power of Faith

Nothing beats the power of faith and belief. Sometimes you might face challenges, sometimes things might not be going your way, and you might feel like giving up – these are the times when faith and belief will keep you going.

So many people give up, just a few inches away from victory. I am sure you are not one of them since you are investing time into self-development which gives the highest returns! Now go out there and start achieving your goals!

Need more motivation? Read our blogs on motivation and become your best self now!

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