Over the course of my life, I have seen some people face some really big demons. These demons have taken the form of broken relationships, drug abuse, violence, lack of purpose, failed businesses and the list goes on.
Some of these demons have scared people into living a meaningless life.
That’s because unless you face these suckers head on and overcome them, they’ll ultimately win. Their goal is to take away your happiness.
So thus far it may sound like a blog post full of nothing but bad news. That is wrong! I’ve seen these demons be tamed and be the cause for certain individuals to achieve greatness.
It’s often these demons that are the catalyst for something magical. You could say these demons are a blessing rather than a curse.
So if it’s so easy Mr. Tim then why is everyone not battling their demons and kicking butt? I put it down to four things:
– Lack of determination
– Lack of being present
– Sheer guts and hard work
So can we implement a strategy to execute on these three setbacks? You bloody bet you!
1. Lack of determination
Your demons are big and ugly, and probably very hairy. The sheer sight of them is enough to make anyone want to give up and settle for a life of mediocrity. That’s why when you look at this beautiful planet you see so many people doing exactly that.
These people settle for living a small life full of no dreams, no goals and no vision to change the world.
“Determination requires you to be unwavering in your focus”
To be determined is to believe in yourself! When you believe in yourself, the size of your demons shrink, and they suddenly become manageable. For you to believe in yourself, you have to love yourself first.
So what you are saying Tim is that to be determined, you have to believe in yourself and that belief can only come from loving yourself? Are you completely delusional? Definitely not. I’ve studied all of the greats and this is the differentiating factor.
The people who conquer their demons believe in themselves and love themselves at the same time. This gives them the mindset to stay determined. You think when Nelson Mandella was stuck in jail and knew that he may never get out that he just sat there and lived every day with his demons?
OF COURSE NOT! The guy sat in prison every day looking at his demons with a big fat smile because he knew that one day he would show them who’s boss.
He waited most of his life to spend the last few years being the example for what believing in yourself and having love for yourself first, and then for everybody around us, can do. It’s the way he conquered his demons that is the reason none of us will ever forget the man!
2. Lack of being present
To battle these bad boys that we call demons, we must be present in the moment. The frustrating thing about demons is that if we are not fully present, we can’t see them. They hide in a dark corner somewhere and secretly sabotage us from getting our dream.
Every now and then they poke their ugly, red, fiery head out from the darkness and hurt us in a big way. If you don’t start to live in the present, then you’ll be forever operating from either the past or the future. In these alternate worlds away from the present, the demons will eventually defeat you.
It’s for this reason that this quote is so famous:
“The average person dies at 25, but is buried at 75”
Don’t be the person that dies at the age of 25 and lives the next 50 years hoping for the world to give them stuff for free like a pension, retirement, the lottery or a holiday to escape the madness. You can’t escape your demons you can only conquer them.
In the present, everything is so much clearer and you can see every detail of your demons including even the smallest freckle on their face. The present is how you get a chance to look at your demons in the eye and smile at them like Nelson Mandela did.
What’s holding you back from conquering your demons is fear. It’s that F word that should be considered worse than that other F word we all drop like it’s going to go out of fashion tomorrow. Fear is what our demons thrive off. Our demons rely on fear to scare you into thinking that all this time you’ve spent on planet Earth is for nothing.
Fear is what tells you that you’re getting old, or you should be married by now, or you should have kids already, or you should own a house or a ridiculously overpriced luxury car.
In my life, fear used to be at the steering wheel of my human body every day. Every decision was made based out of fear and it was like living in a horror movie constantly. Around every corner, it felt like someone was out to get me.
What changed for me was when I discovered personal development and figured out what fear was. Just like our demons, defining fear is challenging because it exists without us knowing a lot of the time.
“When I decided to step out of the darkness and forget about everything other than my vision for my life, fear stopped holding me back”
When I physically felt fear in the form of sickness, nervousness, or a shaking hand, I reframed what it meant to me.
I saw these physical signs as a demonstration that I was pushing the boundaries and no longer settling for second best. I finally decided to step into the light and see what all my fears would really do to me. Then I figured something out: our fear is nothing more than one giant bloody illusion.
When you actually try and decipher what your fear is, you can’t because it’s not real. The demons have you by the curly one’s because they know this to be the case and they’re hoping that you never figure it out. That’s why I’m giving you practical advice on how to overcome them so that you can reach your potential like I did after all of these years.
Start spending time every day noticing your fears. They’re often disguised as indecision or nervousness around something. If you’re constantly over-thinking things then that’s fear also.
What I’ve found useful is to write these fears or experiences down. Then, once a week, read over them. As you start to see your fear, it loses its grip on you.
4. Sheer guts and hard work
Dealing with your demons and crushing them to pieces is hard work. That’s why the majority of people never deal with them. Every time you attempt to conquer your demons, it’s like running a marathon. It requires blood, sweat and tears to distance yourself from them.
As soon as something is hard, we don’t necessarily give up, we do one better; we put off taking action to some point in the future. Remember what I said before about the future? The future is some alternate universe where you live out a fantasy that we’ll allow your demons to win.
Dealing with your demons requires you to be bold and have courage. Like any battle, it requires time and significant emotional suffering. If you put in the hard work though, you get all the benefits of a fearless life.
A life in which you get to control what happens and ultimately have more time to yourself because you’re present. All those people like Richard Branson who you idolize live from this place. Richo didn’t get there by lying by the pool every day; he got there by taking a risk and working his ass off.
You’ll notice one thing if you read the four points above again: they’re all basically a way of thinking. The four points are there to get you to reframe your current perspective. The reason for this is that it’s in your mind that you will mostly defeat your demons, not in the physical world.
Now that you know what these demons look like and how they manipulate your life and lie to you, what are you going to do? I don’t want you to sit around any longer and live in hope. You are in control and all of your greatness starts with a decision.
You can’t make everybody remember your name for the rest of eternity unless you go out there and give them a reason to. Greatness can only stem from a place where all of your demons have been slayed and you are in control. Are you up for the challenge?