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4 Ways To Stay Motivated When Faced with Rejection

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4 Ways To Stay Motivated When Faced with Rejection

Rejection is simply one of the most hurtful things that can happen to any person. What makes it even more painful is the fact that whether we like it or not, it is bound to happen.

More so, anyone can face rejection in any area of their life. Regardless of where it occurs, the effects of rejection are the same. It hurts, it’s no fun and it happens to be the number one reason people are afraid to try. When faced with rejection, it is super important to have the strength to face rejection head on, accept it, learn from it and simply keep on pushing on.

But of course, this is easier said than done. All things equal, the number one major weapon that one needs when containing and dealing with rejection is motivation. Mind you, it is a difficult weapon to master when dealing with rejection which coincidentally has a devastating effect on one’s personal motivation. However, if you are struggling with staying motivated in the face of dealing with rejection in business or life, take a look below.

Here are 4 ways to help you stay motivated and conquer rejection in its tracks:

 

1. Be coachable

You try, you get knocked down. You keep getting knocked down and can’t seem to figure out why? We have all heard it, it is probably one of the most popular definitions floating around today. What you ask? It’s the definition of insanity; doing the same thing over and over again and getting the same results.  Every cloud has a silver lining and by being coachable, you open yourself up to the opportunity to learn new skills and improve the way you do things. There is no doubt about it, for learning and improvement to occur, one must be coachable. There is no short cut to this! Being coachable is about being open to the feedback and opinions given by others and using that feedback to help improve yourself in all facets of life.

On your journey of defeating rejection in its tracks, do yourself a favor and don’t let arrogance, defensiveness, pride or ego hinder your ability to become better at what you do. These traits must be avoided at all costs. Instead, one must embrace humility, objectivity, approachability, confidence and receptiveness among other things. Most importantly, don’t be afraid to relinquish control to help you stay motivated in overcoming the rejections you’re facing!

 

Zig-Ziglar
 

2. Keep your eye on the prize

Yes, you have been rejected, that doesn’t necessarily mean that your dreams and goals are invalid or unachievable. If anything, rejection should motivate you to pay even more attention to what you set out for in the first place. After all, it is 20% what happens to us and 80% how we respond to it. Paying attention to distractions and in this case rejection, only serves to take attention away from the main prize.

Instead of focusing on your stumbles and falls, why not take some time off to cool down, re-evaluate yourself and appreciate your achievements? Doing so, is a major step in ensuring that your gaze is not taken off the prize. Learn how to prioritize and focus on the bigger picture.

 

3. Don’t take it personal

This is simply one of the most spoken phrases in the world, but it is also one of the most useful pieces of advice that a person could be given. So what if you have been rejected? It is part of life, everyone gets rejected. Rejection does not mean that something is wrong with you.

When you let yourself believe that you are inadequate and that something is wrong with you, you are simply feeding the low self-esteem monster. When you let low self-esteem take over, then you might as well say goodbye to the successful achievement of your goals. Always remember, that for you to be successful, you must believe in yourself even when others don’t!

 

4. Never give up

Few people have achieved success by trying once. In fact, most people who have achieved success in their various fields is because they have tried multiple times. The more you try, the more chances you give yourself of succeeding. Even Rome itself, wasn’t built in a day. Giving up signifies that you no longer believe in your capabilities and strengths. Giving up means that you are not ready to learn from your mistakes. Giving up means that you have accepted defeat. Instead, carry on with the struggle, put more effort, avoid the wrong turns that you made before and appreciate the fact that no one, absolutely no one, is perfect.

“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” – Thomas Edison

Rejection is an unavoidable part of life; it is bound to happen at one point or another whether we like it or not. But by being coachable, keeping your eyes on the prize, not taking it personal and pushing on even when the going is rough, you can ensure that your motivation levels are sky high even in the face of rejection.

Thank you for reading my article! What other tips would you give to stay motivated when facing rejection?

Chris Diaz is a sales coach, serial entrepreneur, speaker and writer. He is on a mission to help entrepreneurs realize that they have the power to earn a full time living doing something they love by mastering the million dollar skill of sales! After becoming an orphan in his early twenties, Chris sought out success in life and set out on his entrepreneurial journey in sales and real estate. It is his goal to share his successes and failures to help inspire other young entrepreneurs to be gritty and to keep on, pushing on. Also, don’t tell anyone, but Chris is secretly an entrepreneurship nerd and loves to talk about it.  To visit Chris stop by and visit at : www.entresuccessproject.com or follow him on Facebook.

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9 Comments

9 Comments

  1. aspecialist

    Nov 11, 2015 at 3:30 pm

    Great post. There are other things that you can do, but these pretty much are the basic that you need. Rejection has always part of the path to success. They say if you have not been rejected it’s either you haven’t made an effort or you’re doing it the wrong way, which by the way may lead to failure. You always have choice and you can turn things around. You may be rejected now, but if you’re willing to learn, you try harder and keep pushing forward, you’re more likely be in a good path to success.

  2. rachelakito

    Oct 11, 2015 at 12:52 am

    Thanks for sharing, Chris! Based on my experience, the most effective is not taking everything personal. This has already been my mantra in life. If I fail, I charge it to experience and Ido not dwell too much on it so I can move on to my next goal.

    More power to you!

    • Chris Diaz

      Oct 22, 2015 at 12:59 am

      @rachelakito Absolutely, it’s a business decision. I have learned so much from the major rejections I have had in life. If I would have taken them personally, I would have not pushed forward with a lot of my current successes.

      Thanks for reading and replying! Keep on pushing on!

      Much Success
      CD

  3. Quentin Green

    Sep 29, 2015 at 4:12 pm

    Great points. I especially like #2, keeping your eye on the prize. Our self worth doesn’t come from what people think of us, but how we value ourselves. Knowing your purpose helps keep your actions focused.

    • Chris Diaz

      Sep 30, 2015 at 1:05 am

      @QuentinGreen absolutely my friend. NEVER let anyone dictate your worth or value. We are capable of acheiving the greatness of our goals if we just keep our eyes on the prize and belive in our efforts! Much Success!

  4. Esther Mellar

    Sep 29, 2015 at 8:16 am

    Hi Chris,

    I love how you write: “When you let yourself believe that you are inadequate and that something is wrong with you, you are simply feeding the low self-esteem monster.”
    What I would add is to find out where the “low self-esteem monster” originates in us, what was the situation, what beliefs or wows did we make at the time, which are not useful or downright toxic at this moment of our life. As it all plays out at subconscious level, it is not easy to do this work alone, you need somebody to guide you through this process. What do you think?
    Thank you for the article, I really liked it and going to share it.

    • Chris Diaz

      Sep 29, 2015 at 2:53 pm

      @EstherMellar; you make a very good point. We all have triggers and I think certain ones trigger certain feelings and emotions on a subconscious level. Thanks for pointing that out and thanks for the share!

  5. Dotchamou Zakari

    Sep 28, 2015 at 4:51 pm

    Great thanks for this powerful information. All the 4 ways are great tips to stay motivated. Motivation is something anyone of us must seek if we want to live well and achieve great things. Here are two quotes that may help: “Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” –Winston Churchill
    “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was ending, he turned into a butterfly.” –Proverb

    • Chris Diaz

      Sep 29, 2015 at 2:52 pm

      Thanks for reading! Those quotes are a great add. It is true, motivations and self discipline are the keys to greatness!

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Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Motivation

Your Fears Suck And That’s Why You Must Rinse And Repeat.

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Waking up at 6 am today to go and have a blood test is my worst nightmare.

I’m so damn fearful of needles and it makes me feel sick.

When my doctor said it was time to have a blood test and 10X my energy, I was pumped and crippled with fear at the same time.

 

This sucks big time.

Every time I have a blood test, there’s this big build-up of fear, tension, sickness and everything else that sucks.

I rolled up at the pathology center to try and have my blood test before everyone else. I always walk in like I’m MacGyver until my name is called. Then as I walk to the room where the nurse is, all the confidence, body language and self-talk turns to crap.

The nurse looks at me strangely. I haven’t had this one before. She’s thinking “Geez this guy looks like he’s about to crap his pants, or vomit, or maybe both.”

Why am I so fearful with these routine tests? Probably because I had a few strange experiences when I was a kid and the adult in me still hasn’t forgotten that innocent kid with blue eyes, white blonde hair and the change the world attitude he’s always had.

Back to my story. So, the nurse begins taking my blood and it takes time as she needs to fill up two tubes. It felt like an eternity although the pain was pretty minor – yay!

We get to the end of the test and I’m celebrating like a drunk who’s just woken up and realized he’d won $10k at the casino the night before.

Then the nurse is like “Houston we have a problem.”

My face turns white. “What’s the problem?”

The nurse says “We can only do these tests between Monday to Thursday. Any other day is prohibited. That’s what head office says.”

I’m thinking to myself lots of nasty thoughts like “Well you tell head office to go F themselves!”

I speak with my doctor and he confirms that this is correct. Basically, I have to go through this fearful experiment all over again in a few days’ time.

 

Rinse and repeat.

I go back to the pathology center a few days later and have the test again. It’s a pain in the backside but it must be done. Here’s what’s awesome: I’ve never done multiple blood tests in a short space of time. Doing the test again made this horrible feeling so much easier.

I walked in, did my thing, and walked out. I remembered how to breathe. I remembered how to relax. And I knew what had to be done.

“Facing the same fear multiple times within a few days began to crush all my negative energy”

 

Fears won’t suck as much after a bit of practice.

This fear of blood tests has now changed. It’s still a bit challenging but nowhere near as bad.

My mind has gotten used to what has to happen because practice has made the situation almost perfect.

We all have fears and overcoming them is about embracing the suck, giving it a go and then repeating the process.

Each time you face a fear like blood tests, it gets a little bit easier each time. Sometimes the gains are enormous and other times the gains are small. None the less, facing your fears creates some momentum towards conquering your fear.

Challenging your fears is how you get up close and personal with them. All it takes is a bit of courage and one question: What’s the worst that can happen?

For me, my arm could have fallen off, she could have caused me great pain or I could have passed out. None of these things will see me end up in the cemetery.

 

The feeling of overcoming fear.

Having significantly lessened my fear of blood tests has given me confidence. If I could conquer this massive mountain of internal pain, what else could I do that makes me fearful?

A better question would be, what fear is holding you back that you could practice getting better at?

We all have fears and we can all look them in the face, respect them for what they are, and then have a go at overcoming them.

The feeling of overcoming fear is so good. It gives you strength and resilience to fight the tougher fights. Doing the things that are uncomfortable is how you build a level of comfort that can put you at the top of your field.

We all have fears and those of us who practice overcoming our fears are the ones who get to taste a feeling of success like no other.

Your fears suck but you can overcome them with practice just like I did.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Motivation

Embrace The Suck.

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Embrace the Suck

I suck at spreadsheets.
I suck at maths because numbers do my head in.
I suck at attending meetings because I just want action.

You will suck at your first blog post.
You will suck at your first startup, and the one after that, and so on.
You will suck at giving your first speech.

We all suck 24/7.

None of us are 100% motivated all the time.
None of us get anything right the first time – unless it’s a fluke.

We all have nightmares of our failures.
We all secretly want to be perfect – even me.

 

It’s time to embrace the suck.

A lot about life F*cking sucks hard.

My #EmbraceTheSuck story (thanks Sina Fak for the idea) was failing at high school and dropping out. After a break, I went back and finished high school, and the only subjects I excelled at were music and English.

Even though the headmaster told me I’d always be a no good, punk a$$, drop out, I proved him wrong.

I used my expertise in English to become a blogger and that’s why I’m writing these words to you right now.

I failed in the short-term, but by persevering at school, it eventually led me to right now. I could have done nothing and become a bum. I could have listened to my headmaster and agreed with him.

I knew that I was destined to do something big and I believe the movement I’m creating right now is part of my crazy goal to change the world.

All of us can succeed when we embrace the suck and persevere.

“We can listen to our critics or we can lift the middle finger at them and keep going”

Making it through the suck made me smarter, more courageous and it helped me build a newfound resilience.

 

How do we embrace the suck?

1. Be prepared to fail.
2. Look like an idiot.
3. Be willing to start at the bottom
4. Persevere
5. Challenge the critics

When everything sucks, get back up.
Have a second go even if there’s no reason too.
Back yourself and believe you can push through the suck.

 

Embrace the suck is a call to action.

It’s about being prepared to eat sh*t because the upside makes it worth it. It’s about doing what so many are not prepared to do because you believe in yourself.

It’s about taking action and executing instead of being a daydreamer and being stuck in a foreplay of ideas, dreams, goals that never happen.

Starting at the bottom and sucking harder is how you get to the top.

Once you arrive at the top, make sure you help other people who are embracing the suck.

Let’s all commit to doing more things that suck and being okay with it. Let’s challenge each other to be courageous.

If I can go from being a high school dropout to making something of myself, then why the heck can’t you?

Embrace the suck because that’s what the people you idolize and anyone you’ve ever looked up to did.

Embracing the suck is part of life.

“Hello, adversity. Come at me!”

 

One day you’ll look back on all the sucky moments and be proud.

That’s the cherry on top of the cake right there.

That is all the motivation you need to embrace the suck.

 

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Motivation

Keep Going – Never Give Up. Good People Are Always Rewarded.

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Last week there was some real lows. This week there have been some major highs.

At one point, it looked like my career was down the toilet. Everything I worked for looked like it was done.

The reality is that when you hit a low point, there’s always an upside. The point where you want to give up is just the beginning of something new and amazing. When you hit that low, it’s so easy to want to give up.

You feel like you can’t go on and the odds are stacked against you.

Everything and everyone feel like they are working against your vision for your life. Most of all, you don’t know why you’ve suddenly hit this giant low point that feels like it’s going to last forever.

Your motivation is non-existent; you get out of bed and feel like crap; you’re not sure what today will mean – or the next for that matter.

All of this is fine. No, I’m not giving you some empty promise or meaningless reason to go on. What I’m telling you is that you must keep going. Even though you feel like you can’t, you must!

“All of these low points mean something. All of these low points turn into one giant moment of triumph if you keep stacking them up like shot glasses after a big night”

 

Good people are rewarded.

As long as you do your absolute best to be a good person, eventually your life will change.

All those small things you did for people will be remembered.
Someone will give you a chance and believe in you.
An opportunity will come from nowhere that you never expected.

Rewards always come for those who have earned it. How do you earn those rewards? By being a kind, humble and good person that serves the greater good. Let’s dumb it down further. You get the rewards by:

1. Helping people who have nothing
2. Smiling at as many people as you can
3. Answering messages on social media and helping people without getting anything in return
4. Staying positive through books and blogs like this
5. Waiting out the winter cold for summer to come into your life again

This list of five things is how you remain a good person through the chaos that we all experience. Many people say “That sounds easy Tim, but it’s harder than you think.”

That’s why I’ve made it practical with these five points.

 

How my luck changed this week.

I followed this formula I’ve laid out, and this week my luck changed. All of a sudden, I got multiple opportunities to do work that I love and get paid well for it so that I can focus on my blogging.

The messages I got with these opportunities all started with something like this:

“Thank you for sharing your story and having the guts to do so. You’ve inspired me and I appreciate it. I’d love to chat to you about opportunity X. Are you free for a few minutes?”

Then I got two more emails from television networks wanting me to spread some inspiration on their respective shows.

Your luck will change and opportunities will be presented to you if you keep going, never give up and continue being a good person.

It’s a long road towards getting up close and personal with your most important goal but if you stay the path, stay focused and be the person that makes you proud, it will happen.

 

Keep going.

So, if you’ve ever felt like I felt when my career went down the toilet last week, or you’re feeling that way right now, you must keep going.

I believe you can get what you seek if you remain focused and don’t let the negative emotions in your head take over. I know it’s tough but that’s no excuse. If you want your goals bad enough, then you’ll keep motivated to push through the rejection and failure.

Use selflessness to change your perspective. Look at yourself in the third person. See who you are now and who you can be. All of us can be leaders and when we look at ourselves without our self-talk and ego’s in the way, we can see who we really are.

Dare to dream a little. Don’t be afraid to think big. If you have crazy, audacious goals, then that’s even better.

Don’t be talked out of your mission.
Let your passion rip through the barriers that stand in your way.

Never give up. Keep going.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Motivation

We All Have It Tough – It’s What You Do With The Struggle.

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Lots of my people who read my stuff email me with their struggles. They’re hoping that I will be blown away by how hard they’ve had it. They think it’s some sort of competition to see who has the most battle scars.

By reading so many of these emails of struggle over the last few years, I realized something: we all have it tough. All of us struggle – even me.

– Right now, I have 14 days left until I’ll be out of a job.
– I’ve got some very challenging personal issues to deal with.
– My investments need a major rework and I’m completely lost.

I’ve been offered an opportunity to do public speaking to a large audience and am scared of whether I should say yes. Do I have what it takes? Will I mess it up?

We all have it tough.

What I’ve learned is it’s what you do with the struggle that will define your future.

 

Are you going to sit there and take it?

That’s right I’m asking you right now. What are you going to do with the struggles?

There are only two options:

1. Toughen up and use the struggles as motivation
2. Be a piss weak, sook, and give up.

Your struggles can take you to a new level. When George Lucas tried to make Star Wars, it was a total F*ck up. Everything went wrong. There were natural disasters, lack of money and even the actors thought it was the worse film ever to be made.

Did the creator of the Jedi Knight give up?

Not a chance. He kept going and defied the odds. His reward? One of the most watched movies of all time and plenty of cash to go with it.

You may still be thinking option two is your only hope. Maybe you could be piss weak and just give up. Then you could sit on the couch, watch Netflix, drink wine and pretend that your struggles didn’t stop you from achieving your goals.

 

The good news is giving up works short-term. The bad news?

After the short-term gain of giving up, and getting to Netflix and chill, you’ll be really pissed off at yourself. You’ll have regret and feel even worse than before you began your journey of struggle. Not getting your goals and making next to no progress feels like crap.I spent several years doing this.

“Every night I would get home, watch a Hollywood movie, go to 7-Eleven for some sugar and send useless texts to the toxic people in my life”

These same people were going nowhere and telling me to give up.

Screw that. I did this for a while and felt so empty. Life had no meaning and I was making no impact. The sugar diet made me sick and I ended up becoming bedridden.

 

The struggle is the beginning.

Looking back, without the struggle, I would have never got off my lazy ass and actually taken action. When I say “It’s what you do with the struggle,” what I mean is this:

Having it tough and struggling – like trying to walk up a hill while there’s a mudslide happening at the exact same time – is a big fat signal that you’re onto something.

The motivation and momentum you need to get started is right there in front of your blue eyes.

“You can’t get started on some mammoth task to change your life unless you get pissed off and do it tough”

If you were doing it easy, there’d be no urgent reason to take action.

When you’re like me and you are about to be unemployed, have lots of tough decisions to make and are unsatisfied with your career progression to date, you have to embrace your circumstances.

Now, this sounds like a lot of big words that you’d read in some 2000-page self-help book that repeats the same ideas over and over.

I’m going to dumb it right down:

The struggle is a sign to get started. When you struggle, things can’t really get much worse. What you’re left with is nothing but upside.

 

What action do we take then when we’re struggling?

Let’s use my situation as an example. Here are the action steps I’m using and implementing this week:

1. Accept where you are right now
– This will give you a reality check.

2. Meditate to relax your busy brain
– Stress will force you to make dumb decisions.

3. Get really uncomfortable
– I said yes to a new business venture that involves a lot of public speaking.

4. Resist the temptation to be pissed off
– Getting angry is only going to make things worse. Reserve your energy.

5. Write three things a day you’re grateful for
– This will force you to find the positive.

6. Delete whingers, sooks, liars and complainers from your contact list
– You’ve got enough issues; it’s hard enough to be positive without having toxic people talk nonsense and distract you.

 

Final step: Chill out amigo.

Your world is not going to end tomorrow. You can always start again. You can always fall down and get straight back up. Don’t be so angry with yourself. We all struggle and you’re doing the best that you can. Focus your energy on building your confidence and supporting your growth mindset.

“My future looks like a nuclear apocalypse right now but I’ve learned through the struggles that I always come out the other side on top”

Being impatient and stressing will only bring on more problems for you. It’s not that bad. Things always turn around. This moment of struggle and how you handle it will define who you become.

All of us have unlimited potential and we’re all struggling every day.

Once you learn to accept the struggle, embrace it and see it as a seed to something better, you’ll be well on your way to becoming someone you’re proud of.

Wish me luck with the struggles coming in the next few weeks. We’re in this together don’t forget.

Peace, love, respect.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Life

3 Simple Steps to Remove Drama From Your Life Immediately

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drama

You come home, tired from work, and as soon as you open the door, the drama hits you in the face. Either your boyfriend/girlfriend is throwing a tantrum which ends up in a full-out fight for hours or your boss has a love/hate relationship with you and gives you so many responsibilities that you end up working late in the night. Maybe it is simply your parents who keep forcing you to take the job, partner or university you don’t really want. (more…)

Bruno Boksic is a writer at Medium.com. An avid reader of personal development books, with a 7-year long experience of helping people become the best version of themselves. I don't have all the answers, but the ones I do, I share through my writing.  You can contact me at boksicbruno@gmail.com

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9 Comments

9 Comments

  1. aspecialist

    Nov 11, 2015 at 3:30 pm

    Great post. There are other things that you can do, but these pretty much are the basic that you need. Rejection has always part of the path to success. They say if you have not been rejected it’s either you haven’t made an effort or you’re doing it the wrong way, which by the way may lead to failure. You always have choice and you can turn things around. You may be rejected now, but if you’re willing to learn, you try harder and keep pushing forward, you’re more likely be in a good path to success.

  2. rachelakito

    Oct 11, 2015 at 12:52 am

    Thanks for sharing, Chris! Based on my experience, the most effective is not taking everything personal. This has already been my mantra in life. If I fail, I charge it to experience and Ido not dwell too much on it so I can move on to my next goal.

    More power to you!

    • Chris Diaz

      Oct 22, 2015 at 12:59 am

      @rachelakito Absolutely, it’s a business decision. I have learned so much from the major rejections I have had in life. If I would have taken them personally, I would have not pushed forward with a lot of my current successes.

      Thanks for reading and replying! Keep on pushing on!

      Much Success
      CD

  3. Quentin Green

    Sep 29, 2015 at 4:12 pm

    Great points. I especially like #2, keeping your eye on the prize. Our self worth doesn’t come from what people think of us, but how we value ourselves. Knowing your purpose helps keep your actions focused.

    • Chris Diaz

      Sep 30, 2015 at 1:05 am

      @QuentinGreen absolutely my friend. NEVER let anyone dictate your worth or value. We are capable of acheiving the greatness of our goals if we just keep our eyes on the prize and belive in our efforts! Much Success!

  4. Esther Mellar

    Sep 29, 2015 at 8:16 am

    Hi Chris,

    I love how you write: “When you let yourself believe that you are inadequate and that something is wrong with you, you are simply feeding the low self-esteem monster.”
    What I would add is to find out where the “low self-esteem monster” originates in us, what was the situation, what beliefs or wows did we make at the time, which are not useful or downright toxic at this moment of our life. As it all plays out at subconscious level, it is not easy to do this work alone, you need somebody to guide you through this process. What do you think?
    Thank you for the article, I really liked it and going to share it.

    • Chris Diaz

      Sep 29, 2015 at 2:53 pm

      @EstherMellar; you make a very good point. We all have triggers and I think certain ones trigger certain feelings and emotions on a subconscious level. Thanks for pointing that out and thanks for the share!

  5. Dotchamou Zakari

    Sep 28, 2015 at 4:51 pm

    Great thanks for this powerful information. All the 4 ways are great tips to stay motivated. Motivation is something anyone of us must seek if we want to live well and achieve great things. Here are two quotes that may help: “Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” –Winston Churchill
    “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was ending, he turned into a butterfly.” –Proverb

    • Chris Diaz

      Sep 29, 2015 at 2:52 pm

      Thanks for reading! Those quotes are a great add. It is true, motivations and self discipline are the keys to greatness!

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Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Motivation

Your Fears Suck And That’s Why You Must Rinse And Repeat.

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Waking up at 6 am today to go and have a blood test is my worst nightmare.

I’m so damn fearful of needles and it makes me feel sick.

When my doctor said it was time to have a blood test and 10X my energy, I was pumped and crippled with fear at the same time.

 

This sucks big time.

Every time I have a blood test, there’s this big build-up of fear, tension, sickness and everything else that sucks.

I rolled up at the pathology center to try and have my blood test before everyone else. I always walk in like I’m MacGyver until my name is called. Then as I walk to the room where the nurse is, all the confidence, body language and self-talk turns to crap.

The nurse looks at me strangely. I haven’t had this one before. She’s thinking “Geez this guy looks like he’s about to crap his pants, or vomit, or maybe both.”

Why am I so fearful with these routine tests? Probably because I had a few strange experiences when I was a kid and the adult in me still hasn’t forgotten that innocent kid with blue eyes, white blonde hair and the change the world attitude he’s always had.

Back to my story. So, the nurse begins taking my blood and it takes time as she needs to fill up two tubes. It felt like an eternity although the pain was pretty minor – yay!

We get to the end of the test and I’m celebrating like a drunk who’s just woken up and realized he’d won $10k at the casino the night before.

Then the nurse is like “Houston we have a problem.”

My face turns white. “What’s the problem?”

The nurse says “We can only do these tests between Monday to Thursday. Any other day is prohibited. That’s what head office says.”

I’m thinking to myself lots of nasty thoughts like “Well you tell head office to go F themselves!”

I speak with my doctor and he confirms that this is correct. Basically, I have to go through this fearful experiment all over again in a few days’ time.

 

Rinse and repeat.

I go back to the pathology center a few days later and have the test again. It’s a pain in the backside but it must be done. Here’s what’s awesome: I’ve never done multiple blood tests in a short space of time. Doing the test again made this horrible feeling so much easier.

I walked in, did my thing, and walked out. I remembered how to breathe. I remembered how to relax. And I knew what had to be done.

“Facing the same fear multiple times within a few days began to crush all my negative energy”

 

Fears won’t suck as much after a bit of practice.

This fear of blood tests has now changed. It’s still a bit challenging but nowhere near as bad.

My mind has gotten used to what has to happen because practice has made the situation almost perfect.

We all have fears and overcoming them is about embracing the suck, giving it a go and then repeating the process.

Each time you face a fear like blood tests, it gets a little bit easier each time. Sometimes the gains are enormous and other times the gains are small. None the less, facing your fears creates some momentum towards conquering your fear.

Challenging your fears is how you get up close and personal with them. All it takes is a bit of courage and one question: What’s the worst that can happen?

For me, my arm could have fallen off, she could have caused me great pain or I could have passed out. None of these things will see me end up in the cemetery.

 

The feeling of overcoming fear.

Having significantly lessened my fear of blood tests has given me confidence. If I could conquer this massive mountain of internal pain, what else could I do that makes me fearful?

A better question would be, what fear is holding you back that you could practice getting better at?

We all have fears and we can all look them in the face, respect them for what they are, and then have a go at overcoming them.

The feeling of overcoming fear is so good. It gives you strength and resilience to fight the tougher fights. Doing the things that are uncomfortable is how you build a level of comfort that can put you at the top of your field.

We all have fears and those of us who practice overcoming our fears are the ones who get to taste a feeling of success like no other.

Your fears suck but you can overcome them with practice just like I did.

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Motivation

Embrace The Suck.

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Embrace the Suck

I suck at spreadsheets.
I suck at maths because numbers do my head in.
I suck at attending meetings because I just want action.

You will suck at your first blog post.
You will suck at your first startup, and the one after that, and so on.
You will suck at giving your first speech.

We all suck 24/7.

None of us are 100% motivated all the time.
None of us get anything right the first time – unless it’s a fluke.

We all have nightmares of our failures.
We all secretly want to be perfect – even me.

 

It’s time to embrace the suck.

A lot about life F*cking sucks hard.

My #EmbraceTheSuck story (thanks Sina Fak for the idea) was failing at high school and dropping out. After a break, I went back and finished high school, and the only subjects I excelled at were music and English.

Even though the headmaster told me I’d always be a no good, punk a$$, drop out, I proved him wrong.

I used my expertise in English to become a blogger and that’s why I’m writing these words to you right now.

I failed in the short-term, but by persevering at school, it eventually led me to right now. I could have done nothing and become a bum. I could have listened to my headmaster and agreed with him.

I knew that I was destined to do something big and I believe the movement I’m creating right now is part of my crazy goal to change the world.

All of us can succeed when we embrace the suck and persevere.

“We can listen to our critics or we can lift the middle finger at them and keep going”

Making it through the suck made me smarter, more courageous and it helped me build a newfound resilience.

 

How do we embrace the suck?

1. Be prepared to fail.
2. Look like an idiot.
3. Be willing to start at the bottom
4. Persevere
5. Challenge the critics

When everything sucks, get back up.
Have a second go even if there’s no reason too.
Back yourself and believe you can push through the suck.

 

Embrace the suck is a call to action.

It’s about being prepared to eat sh*t because the upside makes it worth it. It’s about doing what so many are not prepared to do because you believe in yourself.

It’s about taking action and executing instead of being a daydreamer and being stuck in a foreplay of ideas, dreams, goals that never happen.

Starting at the bottom and sucking harder is how you get to the top.

Once you arrive at the top, make sure you help other people who are embracing the suck.

Let’s all commit to doing more things that suck and being okay with it. Let’s challenge each other to be courageous.

If I can go from being a high school dropout to making something of myself, then why the heck can’t you?

Embrace the suck because that’s what the people you idolize and anyone you’ve ever looked up to did.

Embracing the suck is part of life.

“Hello, adversity. Come at me!”

 

One day you’ll look back on all the sucky moments and be proud.

That’s the cherry on top of the cake right there.

That is all the motivation you need to embrace the suck.

 

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Motivation

Keep Going – Never Give Up. Good People Are Always Rewarded.

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Last week there was some real lows. This week there have been some major highs.

At one point, it looked like my career was down the toilet. Everything I worked for looked like it was done.

The reality is that when you hit a low point, there’s always an upside. The point where you want to give up is just the beginning of something new and amazing. When you hit that low, it’s so easy to want to give up.

You feel like you can’t go on and the odds are stacked against you.

Everything and everyone feel like they are working against your vision for your life. Most of all, you don’t know why you’ve suddenly hit this giant low point that feels like it’s going to last forever.

Your motivation is non-existent; you get out of bed and feel like crap; you’re not sure what today will mean – or the next for that matter.

All of this is fine. No, I’m not giving you some empty promise or meaningless reason to go on. What I’m telling you is that you must keep going. Even though you feel like you can’t, you must!

“All of these low points mean something. All of these low points turn into one giant moment of triumph if you keep stacking them up like shot glasses after a big night”

 

Good people are rewarded.

As long as you do your absolute best to be a good person, eventually your life will change.

All those small things you did for people will be remembered.
Someone will give you a chance and believe in you.
An opportunity will come from nowhere that you never expected.

Rewards always come for those who have earned it. How do you earn those rewards? By being a kind, humble and good person that serves the greater good. Let’s dumb it down further. You get the rewards by:

1. Helping people who have nothing
2. Smiling at as many people as you can
3. Answering messages on social media and helping people without getting anything in return
4. Staying positive through books and blogs like this
5. Waiting out the winter cold for summer to come into your life again

This list of five things is how you remain a good person through the chaos that we all experience. Many people say “That sounds easy Tim, but it’s harder than you think.”

That’s why I’ve made it practical with these five points.

 

How my luck changed this week.

I followed this formula I’ve laid out, and this week my luck changed. All of a sudden, I got multiple opportunities to do work that I love and get paid well for it so that I can focus on my blogging.

The messages I got with these opportunities all started with something like this:

“Thank you for sharing your story and having the guts to do so. You’ve inspired me and I appreciate it. I’d love to chat to you about opportunity X. Are you free for a few minutes?”

Then I got two more emails from television networks wanting me to spread some inspiration on their respective shows.

Your luck will change and opportunities will be presented to you if you keep going, never give up and continue being a good person.

It’s a long road towards getting up close and personal with your most important goal but if you stay the path, stay focused and be the person that makes you proud, it will happen.

 

Keep going.

So, if you’ve ever felt like I felt when my career went down the toilet last week, or you’re feeling that way right now, you must keep going.

I believe you can get what you seek if you remain focused and don’t let the negative emotions in your head take over. I know it’s tough but that’s no excuse. If you want your goals bad enough, then you’ll keep motivated to push through the rejection and failure.

Use selflessness to change your perspective. Look at yourself in the third person. See who you are now and who you can be. All of us can be leaders and when we look at ourselves without our self-talk and ego’s in the way, we can see who we really are.

Dare to dream a little. Don’t be afraid to think big. If you have crazy, audacious goals, then that’s even better.

Don’t be talked out of your mission.
Let your passion rip through the barriers that stand in your way.

Never give up. Keep going.

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Motivation

We All Have It Tough – It’s What You Do With The Struggle.

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Lots of my people who read my stuff email me with their struggles. They’re hoping that I will be blown away by how hard they’ve had it. They think it’s some sort of competition to see who has the most battle scars.

By reading so many of these emails of struggle over the last few years, I realized something: we all have it tough. All of us struggle – even me.

– Right now, I have 14 days left until I’ll be out of a job.
– I’ve got some very challenging personal issues to deal with.
– My investments need a major rework and I’m completely lost.

I’ve been offered an opportunity to do public speaking to a large audience and am scared of whether I should say yes. Do I have what it takes? Will I mess it up?

We all have it tough.

What I’ve learned is it’s what you do with the struggle that will define your future.

 

Are you going to sit there and take it?

That’s right I’m asking you right now. What are you going to do with the struggles?

There are only two options:

1. Toughen up and use the struggles as motivation
2. Be a piss weak, sook, and give up.

Your struggles can take you to a new level. When George Lucas tried to make Star Wars, it was a total F*ck up. Everything went wrong. There were natural disasters, lack of money and even the actors thought it was the worse film ever to be made.

Did the creator of the Jedi Knight give up?

Not a chance. He kept going and defied the odds. His reward? One of the most watched movies of all time and plenty of cash to go with it.

You may still be thinking option two is your only hope. Maybe you could be piss weak and just give up. Then you could sit on the couch, watch Netflix, drink wine and pretend that your struggles didn’t stop you from achieving your goals.

 

The good news is giving up works short-term. The bad news?

After the short-term gain of giving up, and getting to Netflix and chill, you’ll be really pissed off at yourself. You’ll have regret and feel even worse than before you began your journey of struggle. Not getting your goals and making next to no progress feels like crap.I spent several years doing this.

“Every night I would get home, watch a Hollywood movie, go to 7-Eleven for some sugar and send useless texts to the toxic people in my life”

These same people were going nowhere and telling me to give up.

Screw that. I did this for a while and felt so empty. Life had no meaning and I was making no impact. The sugar diet made me sick and I ended up becoming bedridden.

 

The struggle is the beginning.

Looking back, without the struggle, I would have never got off my lazy ass and actually taken action. When I say “It’s what you do with the struggle,” what I mean is this:

Having it tough and struggling – like trying to walk up a hill while there’s a mudslide happening at the exact same time – is a big fat signal that you’re onto something.

The motivation and momentum you need to get started is right there in front of your blue eyes.

“You can’t get started on some mammoth task to change your life unless you get pissed off and do it tough”

If you were doing it easy, there’d be no urgent reason to take action.

When you’re like me and you are about to be unemployed, have lots of tough decisions to make and are unsatisfied with your career progression to date, you have to embrace your circumstances.

Now, this sounds like a lot of big words that you’d read in some 2000-page self-help book that repeats the same ideas over and over.

I’m going to dumb it right down:

The struggle is a sign to get started. When you struggle, things can’t really get much worse. What you’re left with is nothing but upside.

 

What action do we take then when we’re struggling?

Let’s use my situation as an example. Here are the action steps I’m using and implementing this week:

1. Accept where you are right now
– This will give you a reality check.

2. Meditate to relax your busy brain
– Stress will force you to make dumb decisions.

3. Get really uncomfortable
– I said yes to a new business venture that involves a lot of public speaking.

4. Resist the temptation to be pissed off
– Getting angry is only going to make things worse. Reserve your energy.

5. Write three things a day you’re grateful for
– This will force you to find the positive.

6. Delete whingers, sooks, liars and complainers from your contact list
– You’ve got enough issues; it’s hard enough to be positive without having toxic people talk nonsense and distract you.

 

Final step: Chill out amigo.

Your world is not going to end tomorrow. You can always start again. You can always fall down and get straight back up. Don’t be so angry with yourself. We all struggle and you’re doing the best that you can. Focus your energy on building your confidence and supporting your growth mindset.

“My future looks like a nuclear apocalypse right now but I’ve learned through the struggles that I always come out the other side on top”

Being impatient and stressing will only bring on more problems for you. It’s not that bad. Things always turn around. This moment of struggle and how you handle it will define who you become.

All of us have unlimited potential and we’re all struggling every day.

Once you learn to accept the struggle, embrace it and see it as a seed to something better, you’ll be well on your way to becoming someone you’re proud of.

Wish me luck with the struggles coming in the next few weeks. We’re in this together don’t forget.

Peace, love, respect.

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