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The One Concept We All Need to Accept for a Happier Life

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Best Man Speech: “I met Caleb when I was 15. I’ve been with him through a broken collar bone when he got sacked in football, being suspended from school when we well…let’s just say got in trouble. I’ve been with him through his first heartbreak and I will never forget the night he told me he was going to marry Jackie. You two are meant for each other, I knew it from the first time I saw you together. So, let’s raise a glass to Caleb and Jackie, today is a day filled with happiness but remember, This Too Shall Pass”.

Can you imagine?

Have you ever been having the time of your life, laughing, smiling, you are feeling so happy and then someone says to you, “This too shall pass”? Probably not!

That phrase is usually only used when you are going through a challenging time in your life, not something you would hear at a wedding, birthday party, the excitement from a promotion…am I right?

This too shall pass is a Persian phrase that reflects on the temporary nature or impermanence of anything and everything.

An early English citation of “This too shall pass” appears first in 1848. It was also notably used in a speech by Abraham Lincoln before he was president in 1859.

This too shall pass means that the difficult things you are facing will pass, but it also does mean the amazing things you experience will pass as well. In other words, impermanence.

What is impermanence?

Impermanence is the state of accepting that everything is temporary. Acceptance of impermanence is not meant to make you a Debbie Downer. The idea is that it allows you to cope more easily with challenging times if you can accept that life is fluid.

If you come to the conclusion that life is not permanent, and neither is anything in it (relationships, children, job, physical capabilities, financial status, etc.), then you are more likely to react gracefully when something in your life changes.  

Impermanence can give you hope that the painful moments you are facing will not last forever. It also can encourage you to work on being more present because the truth is that you, your relationships, your job, and your mental state will not always be in a permanent state of happiness and bliss.

“When things are bad, remember: It won’t always be this way. Take one day at a time. When things are good remember: It won’t  always be this way. Enjoy every great moment.” –Doc Zantamata

What can you gain by learning to accept impermanence?

  1. You accept that bad things will come to an end
  2. You accept that good things will come to an end 
  3. You accept ALL emotions are fluid and will not last forever
  4. You accept that life is dynamic, not static

When you are happy, enjoy it! Treasure those moments and be as present as you can be. When you are hurting, feel it, acknowledge it, learn from it and know it will not last forever. You never know if your next moment will be a good moment or bad moment, but what you do know is that whichever it is, it will change.

How do you accept impermanence? Well, you already have before and probably didn’t even realize it. Think back to the last time you had the cold or the flu. You didn’t say to yourself, “Ok, this is it. It’s been a good life. I’m dying.” Ok, maybe you felt like that for a second, but in reality, you knew that it would last 3-5 days and you would feel better again. That is practicing and accepting impermanence.

Embracing impermanence in my life has made me more mindful of living in the present and more emotionally grounded. It also reminds me that things will happen in life that I don’t have control over, but I get to control how to respond to them. 

Let’s try that Best Man Speech again…

“I met Caleb when I was 15. I’ve been with him through a broken collar bone when he got sacked in football, being suspended from school when we well…let’s just say got in trouble. I’ve been with him through his first heartbreak and I will never forget the night he told me he was going to marry Jackie. You two are meant for each other, I knew it from the first time I saw you together. The advice I give you today I’ve learned during my own journey. In my own marriage and in life, I have learned to embrace impermanence. You will have amazing moments together, that will pass. You will have challenges you will face, that will pass as well and be replaced with happy moments again. This journey you are on together is fluid and will forever be changing, embrace all of it! It’s all a part of the ride you are taking together. Oh, and have lots of sex! Let’s raise a glass to Caleb and Jackie!”

Jasmine Rice is a certified life coach with a degree in psychology from the University of Kansas. After experiencing a series of challenging life transitions, including a divorce and a job loss, Jasmine went from surviving to thriving. Her experiences along the way have humbled her and inspired her passion to support others experiencing grief, unexpected change, loss, or any challenging life transition. She supports and guides you while you create your own life recipe.

Life

The 3 Most Important Things I Learned About Personal Growth

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When you look back on your life, what do you want to think about? Do you plan to reminisce on all of the good things that have happened and how they shaped who you are today? Or would you rather remember all of the bad decisions, challenging experiences, and mistakes made that hurt or wasted a portion of your life?

In my opinion, I think it is important to reflect on both. While it’s important to remember the hardships we’ve been through in our lives – without them we wouldn’t be where we are now. There are 3 very specific areas that I feel have helped me grow in a personal sense more than anything else in my life so far. 

These aren’t simple lessons in a book or a lecture that you can just absorb and apply to your life. These are things that I’ve learned through experience and reflection, and I’m still learning and growing today.

1. We determine how much we’re worth by what we think about ourselves, others, and life in general.

This might seem like a pretty obvious lesson in life but it’s actually one of the most important because we can determine our own worth by how we think about ourselves and the world around us. If you’re looking for success in any kind of business or social setting (dating), then I’ll tell you right now that it doesn’t matter if you have 10 billion dollars or not – people are still going to judge you based on your thoughts and beliefs alone.

What determines our value isn’t necessarily what we do with our lives (which is often based on luck) but whether or not we believe that ‘our work’ is worthy or not in some sort of grand scheme or universe. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can always control how we value ourselves and others.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” – Maya Angelou

2. You don’t have to change your habits or personality just because someone else doesn’t like it – their opinions are THEIRS alone.

This is another one of those lessons that people tend to pick up on a little bit late in life, but if anything that makes its importance even worse! Basically, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to meet someone who has certain expectations of you as a person…but these expectations might not be realistic due to their motivations and personal beliefs. For example, sometimes parents might expect you to be a lawyer or doctor because that’s what they believe is best for their child.

However, this isn’t the case for everyone and so maybe your passion lies in music or writing novels. In this example, if you were also pressured into becoming a doctor – then there would obviously be some kind of conflict going on within yourself as a person. You should never have to give up something that you want to do just because someone else doesn’t like it! The reason why we’re put onto this Earth is to make our own choices and go after our OWN dreams instead of letting others determine what we can and cannot do with our lives .

3. You can’t change your life until you accept that you need to make a change.

When I was younger, I thought that this lesson would be pretty obvious – but as I got older, it really made me appreciate the fact that there are always different ways of perceiving our lives. For example, if someone wants to become rich and famous one day – their mind might simply overshadow any other possibility in their head because they feel like this is what they NEED to do right now.

However, this isn’t always true within our own lives because we think about things too literally instead of having an open mind. If you want to achieve success in any kind of business or social setting (dating) then you should be willing to try out different things instead of staying in your comfort zone. If you want something, then it’s up to YOU to actually go after it – nobody else is going to give it to you!

The three lessons above are some of the main things I want to pass on to everyone because they’ve come at an important time in my life where I need to start thinking about others instead of only myself. It’s great if we can learn to love ourselves first before anything else, but that doesn’t mean you should neglect everyone around you even though they might be your friends and family members!

If you enjoyed this article on the 3 most important things I learned about personal growth, then please share it with your friends and family! Also, check out my other articles on success & motivation as well as life lessons that could help people who are struggling with their life right now on lifengoal.com. Thanks for reading!

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I can still hear the voices of my older relatives and my elementary school teachers telling me “be disciplined”, “keep at it”, to give time and energy towards what we want. As a young, impressionable child, I believed all those things because well, they made sense. They worked. And honestly, I felt like it’s the only way to flourish. (more…)

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3 Business Optimization Strategies That Create a Fulfilled Life

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The balance between life and business is an interesting conundrum. There are articles, books, podcasts, and videos that talk about the need for work-life balance. The reality is that the balance has to be specific to your situation, and it’s a lifelong process to attain. Business leaders should be more focused on optimization strategies that create freedom in an enjoyable way. (more…)

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