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The One Choice That Can Change Your Life Forever

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“One thing to achieve this along with five steps to overcome that and supposedly success will arrive at our front door.” We read headlines like that all the time, yet most of those claims are bogus. How many times have you tried to change a habit within 21 days only to hit the wall on day 2? Perhaps you make it all the way to day 21 and then day 22 arrives without that transformation in hand. What then?

What if I told you that there is one thing you could do that would set you apart from the pack? There are many skills needed to achieve success, but only one goes unnoticed time and time again. 

Decades ago, I was an events coordinator for a large faith based organization. I watched people come weekend after weekend to conferences and retreats. Some of them would have “life changing” experiences. Within weeks, they would be back. Something happened to that amazing moment. Somehow “it” didn’t stick. What was missing?

I do genuinely believe that individuals have experiences at events. I also know for a fact that an experience doesn’t translate into a changed life without this one element. 

As a yoga therapist, I spend one hour with clients weekly and as we get to the 45 minute mark, I round the corner. What does that mean? I step into what identifies the key to a transformational change. It starts with a variety of questions. “Reflect back, what stands out to you as important?” That question is obviously a call to begin to reflect. More than that, it is a moment to begin to integrate the experience. 

”You cannot have a meaningful life without having self-reflection.” – Oprah Winfrey

Here are the next questions I ask:

  • What was revealed to you? 
  • What about the experience that you had was life changing? 
  • How did it change you in the moment? 
  • What action can you take to bring that life altering experience into your evening, tonight? 
  • How can you bring it into your day, tomorrow? 
  • How can you make room for it throughout this week? 
  • What action are you going to take to ensure that it wasn’t a fleeting one time fluke?

Reflection and integration are the keys to incorporating experiences and making real and lasting change. Teaching my clients this one tool of integration is the game changer. Taking each of us closer from the experiences we have to the life we want to be living. 

You don’t have to wait for a life altering experience to begin. Every night, set aside 5 minutes, grab a pen and notebook and reflect back on your day. 

What were the highlights? When did you react versus respond? Why? What buttons were pushed? When did you do your best work? What made you happy? What was frustrating? Then, integrate the reflections. What stands out to you as important? What will help support you to do more of your best work? What will empower you to respond well versus react poorly?

”By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.” – Confucius

Take the time, reflect back upon your days and experiences, integrate the highlights and form action steps towards creating the change you want to see in your life. 

Do you self-reflect on your life by journaling? If so, what are the key benefits you’ve experienced from journaling? Share them with us below!

Elle Miller is a trauma-informed C-IAYT yoga therapist and Body Advocate working to bring transformation into the workplace. Her speciality is  finding spaces that shift anxiety and burn out, zoom fatigue and disconnection. She created The Listening Project as a means to show  how subversive the very act of learning how to listen can become. Connect with her at Elle@LivingMangaliso.com to schedule your personal session or to find out more about our corporate offerings.

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The Surprising Secret About Growth and Change

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Innovation and change drive business growth, but there’s one piece about growth and change that business owners and entrepreneurs often overlook. It’s not the most fun or glamorous piece, but if you recognize and accept it, the payoff is huge. This is particularly crucial for self-employed business owners when there’s little to no separation between yourself and your business. When your level of success equates to how much you have personally developed. I call it Growth Jet Lag, and when you know how to navigate it, you set yourself up for lasting success. (more…)

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Practicing Self-Devotion: 3 Ways Towards a More Mindful and Compassionate You

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I can still hear the voices of my older relatives and my elementary school teachers telling me “be disciplined”, “keep at it”, to give time and energy towards what we want. As a young, impressionable child, I believed all those things because well, they made sense. They worked. And honestly, I felt like it’s the only way to flourish. (more…)

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Identifying Your Emotions is the Key to Exponential Happiness

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In the weeks and months following the heinous terror attacks of September 11, millions of Americans decreased their domestic air travel. As domestic flying decreased, car travel increased where a study found that people opted to drive longer distances rather than fly. Not taking into account 9/11, there were 331 airplane crash fatalities in the U.S from 1751 crash events. What’s interesting is there were 42,000 driving-related deaths in that same year. The number of deaths in air travel and road travel remained relatively consistent in subsequent years. (more…)

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4 Life Changing Lessons I Learned by Starting a Podcast

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I had, and still have, a message I want to share with those that will listen. Heck, I am even willing to share it to those that are less than willing to listen. Therefore, I decided to start a podcast. A podcast focused on those that feel like the odds are stacked against them when it comes to venturing into those entrepreneurial waters. Those that have an inner belief that they can do it, but perhaps the people around them are less than enthusiastic about this new journey. 

Nonetheless, these Dark Horses, as I call them, buck the odds and run their own race to reach their own dreams and achieve their own goals. Little did I know that as I launched The Dark Horse Entrepreneur podcast, on a mission to teach others the lessons I have learned in business and in life, that I would be in turn learning even more lessons because of stepping out into the podcast arena. (more…)

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