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The 5 Questions to Ask Yourself to Uncover Your Purpose

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For many years in my life, I fell into the trap of thinking that if I search externally, my purpose would come to me. It began during my junior year of college, when I saw most of my peers preparing themselves for interviews with consulting firms with the hopes of landing a summer internship, which would then convert into a full-time offer before senior year.

I thought that consulting was a good option based on its popularity on campus, in addition to how the consulting firms marketed themselves, “Consulting is like a continuation of your liberal arts degree. You’ll get a breadth of experiences across sectors and you’ll get a depth of knowledge by diving into each of your projects.”

At the beginning of my senior year, I landed a full-time offer as a consultant and I was over the moon! As a first-generation, low-income college graduate from an immigrant family, I was going to make more money than my parents and achieve upward mobility. However, it didn’t take long for the excitement to wear off when I discovered the monotony of my job. A year and a half later, I left my job and shortly afterwards, I took a sabbatical to work in Italy for a few months.

I had very high expectations for my sabbatical – I very much believed that working abroad, being surrounded by different people and living in a new environment would lead me to, one day, wake up and magically know my purpose. Spoiler alert: It didn’t! Although, I will say, the experience helped me realize what I enjoy, what I don’t enjoy and that my problems/existential questions will follow me, wherever I go, even if I’m halfway across the world.

“Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.” – Viktor Frankl

With these experiences, I’ve learned that uncovering our purpose is more about turning inward – tuning into our inner guidance, something that is always available to us, if we’re able to quiet our minds and listen. I’ve also come to realize that our purpose encompasses much more than just our careers. Living our purpose means living intentionally – engaging in meaningful and worthwhile pursuits, both in and outside of work. When we can contribute to those around us in ways that feel true to us, we are then able to feel a deep sense of contentment and fulfillment that is hard to find elsewhere.

When you have a moment to access that quiet space within you, I invite you to reflect on the following questions to uncover your purpose:

1. WHO do you admire?

When you admire people, it’s usually because they embody certain qualities. Whatever qualities you see in the people you admire are qualities that already exist within you. Perhaps they just need to be given some attention and cultivated so that you feel like you are embodying those same qualities in your everyday life.

2. WHAT makes you happy?

Go and do the things that make you feel happy! (Even if it feels like you’re not being “productive.”) When we let our minds rest and feel happier, new ways of thinking are available to us. For example: I love being out in nature. One day, I went on a solo 2+ hour walk on a trail without listening to podcasts/music, which didn’t seem very “productive.” However, it was during this walk that all these ideas for my business popped up.

3. WHERE are you?

We are a product of our environments. When I was in a small town in India, it was so easy for me to relax and take each moment as it came because the people around me had a similar approach to life. However, if you asked me to embody this way of being in New York City, I’d have a much harder time because New Yorkers are always on the go. So, what this question is getting at is – are you surrounding yourself with people who support your dreams and aspirations? Are you in an environment that is conducive for you to reflect deeply and dream big.

4. WHEN were you happiest and WHEN were you most angry?

The first question will enable you to see the values that were being honored when you were happiest and the second question will enable you to see the values that were violated when you were most angry. Both questions will inform you of the values that you hold dear to your heart and when you’re aware of those values, you can use them as a guiding light any time you make a decision.

“Activity without purpose is the drain of your life.” – Tony Robbins

5. WHY do you do the things that you do?

Be honest with yourself. For example: Why did I choose to go into consulting? I went into consulting because I thought that it was the “right” path due to the fact that:

  • most of my peers were going down that path
  • I was convinced that consulting would give me the “breadth and depth” of experiences
  • I felt like I needed to earn a certain amount of money

However, had I been more honest with myself, I would’ve realized that what I cared more about than fitting in, having a variety of experiences and making good money was helping people. I did eventually come to that realization so when I was looking for another job, the main question became, “What are the job opportunities that will allow me to help people?” 

“The answers you seek are inside of you.” May you give them the time and space to come forth. 

Angela is an International Life Purpose and Career Coach. She helps driven professionals who feel stuck and unfulfilled to discover their purpose so that they can have both the impact and income that they want. Sign up for her FREE guide, 6 Steps to Living Your Purpose here and learn more about her coaching program at www.angelachoi.co.

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Life

How to Regain Confidence After Falling Prey to a Scam

Regain confidence and protect yourself after falling for a scam

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online scams
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Scams, both online and offline, can be painful experiences. You trust someone, and they use that trust against you. But remember, it’s not your fault. Scams can happen to anyone—even the most cautious individuals. These situations are more common than you think and don’t reflect your naivety but rather your good-willed nature. (more…)

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Life

How Learning the Skill of Hope Can Change Everything

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life

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Hope as a skill
Image Credit: Midjourney

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life.

Wishful thinking, on the other hand, is like having dreams in the sky without a ladder to climb, having a destination without a map, or trying to operate a jet-engine airplane without instructions. It sounds nice but is impossible to realize. You don’t have what you need to make it happen!

What Real Hope Is

Real hope is actionable, practical, and realistic. Better yet, it’s feasible and can be learned.

One popular approach is Hope Theory. This concept is used by colleges to study how hope impacts students’ academic performance. Researchers found that students with high levels of hope achieve better grades and are more likely to graduate compared to those with less hope.

Hope can be broken down into two components:

  1. Pathways – The “how to” of hope. This is where people think of and establish plans for achieving their goals.
  2. Agency – The “I can” of hope. This is the belief that the person can accomplish their goals.

Does Hope Really Work?

According to Webster’s Dictionary, hope as a noun is defined as: “desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment.”

As humans, we are wired to crave fulfillment. We have the ability to envision it and, through hope, make it a reality.

My Experience with Hope

For 13 years, I was a hopeless human. During my time working at a luxury hotel as a front desk agent earning $11.42 per hour, I felt the sting of hopelessness the most.

The regret of feeling my time was being stolen from me lingered every time I clocked in. Eventually, I decided to do something about it.

I gave myself permission to hope for something better. I began establishing pathways to success and regained agency by learning from self-help books and seeking mentorship.

Because I took action toward something I desired, I now feel more hope and joy than I ever felt hopelessness. Hope changed me.

Hope Actually Improves Your Life

Wishful thinking doesn’t work, and false hope is equally ineffective. Real hope, however, is directly tied to success in all areas of life.

Studies show that hopeful people tend to:

  • Demonstrate better problem-solving skills
  • Cultivate healthier relationships
  • Maintain stronger motivation to achieve goals
  • Exhibit better work ethic
  • Have a positive outlook on life

These benefits can impact work life, family life, habit-building, mental health, physical health, and spiritual practice. Imagine how much better your life could be by applying real hope to all these areas.

How to Develop the Skill to Hope

As acclaimed French writer Jean Giono wrote in The Man Who Planted Trees:
“There are also times in life when a person has to rush off in pursuit of hopefulness.”

If you are at one of those times, here are ways to develop the skill to hope:

1. Dream Again

To cultivate hope, you need to believe in its possibility. Start by:

  • Reflecting on what you’re passionate about, your values, and what you want to achieve.
  • Writing your dreams down, sharing them with someone encouraging, or saying them out loud.
  • Creating a vision board to make your dreams feel more tangible.

Dreams are the foundation of hope—they give you something meaningful to aspire toward.

2. Create an Environment of Hope

  • Set Goals: Write down your goals and create a plan to achieve them.
  • Visualize Success: Use inspirational quotes, photos, or tools like dumbbells or canvases to remind yourself of your goals.
  • Build a Resource Library: Collect books, eBooks, or audiobooks about hope and success to inspire you.

An environment that fosters hope will keep you motivated, resilient, and focused.

3. Face the Challenges

Don’t avoid challenges—overcoming them builds confidence. Participating in challenging activities, like strategic games, can enhance your problem-solving skills and reinforce hope.

4. Commit to Wisdom

Seek wisdom from those who have achieved what you aspire to. Whether through books, blogs, or social media platforms, learn from their journeys. Wisdom provides the foundation for real, actionable hope.

5. Take Note of Small Wins

Reflecting on past victories can fuel your hope for the future. Ask yourself:

  • What challenges have I already overcome?
  • How did I feel when I succeeded?

By remembering those feelings of happiness, relief, or satisfaction, your brain will naturally adopt a more hopeful mindset.

Conclusion

Hope is more than wishful thinking—it’s a powerful skill that can transform your life. By dreaming again, creating a hopeful environment, facing challenges, seeking wisdom, and celebrating small wins, you can develop the real hope necessary for success in all aspects of life.

Let hope guide you toward a brighter, more fulfilling future.

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Life

The 5 Stages of a Quarter-Life Crisis & What You Can Do

A quarter-life crisis isn’t a sign you’ve lost your way; it’s a sign you’re fighting for a life that’s truly yours.

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what is a quarter life crisis
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The quarter-life crisis is a well-defined set of stages—Trapped, Checking Out, Separation, Exploration, Rebuilding—one goes through in breaking free from feelings of meaninglessness, lack of fulfillment, and misalignment with purpose. I detail the stages and interweave my story below. (more…)

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Life

Here’s The Thing About Learning, Unlearning, and Relearning

Stop hoarding and start sharing your knowledge and wealth for the benefit of humankind

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sharing your knowledge
Image Credit: Midjourney

Few people have the habit of hoarding their wealth without spending.  However, it limits their motivation as they tend to get into their comfort zones.  When people start spending money, then there will be depletion in their coffers. (more…)

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