How we are taught to approach relationships means they are often the most fraught and challenging area of human existence. The good news is if we are willing to become self-aware, other possibilities exist for the way we connect to and exist with others.
I’ve been blessed to get to know many beautiful people at different places on their journey towards consciousness and to study some pretty cool tools and resources around this topic too. As a result, I’ve noticed seven aspects or super powers that highly conscious individuals appear to have honed within themselves with regards to their relationships.
These facets of relating, blow our past human conditioning out of the water as these inspiring individuals give us all permission to break the mould and seek out and create relationship experiences that until recently most of us could only dream of.
Here are the 7 super powers of highly conscious, spiritual people in a relationship:
1. Women don’t make men wrong
As the amazing Gary Douglas says “Women are by and large conditioned to make men wrong for EVERYTHING”. When I first realized this and put it into practice in my relationship at the time, things sure changed for me.
We have almost an endemic mindset in our culture of blaming and making men wrong and it’s surprising how sneaky and strongly engrained this is. When we stop blaming men, they feel safe and are willing to be vulnerable, building a stronger, more powerful connection with us.
TIP: If you didn’t make your man wrong for anything what would that create in your relationship?
2. Men fully support their partners in all that they do
Conscious men realize how phenomenal their partners are in every respect. Dealing with their body’s monthly cycles, working in a job where perhaps they don’t get paid as much as their male colleagues and being accomplished, sexy and caring goddesses at home and work.
These men offer real support, because they want to facilitate their partner’s highest good and they care deeply and see that the old status quo in relationships is imbalanced and doesn’t work.
When a woman receives this level of support, there is nothing she wouldn’t do for her man and closeness and intimacy can flourish.
TIP: What can you do today that would facilitate your partner to have more ease and support her purpose and highest good?
“To be brave is to love someone unconditionally, without expecting anything in return.” – Madonna
3. Don’t take responsibility for another’s feelings
Empathy involves energetically following our partner down the rabbit hole to show how much we care. Super heroes of relationship know that when we sympathize with anyone’s lows, we make them significant and dis-empower them further.
Instead, they have their partner’s back by holding and maintaining an expanded, loving space for them, so they can step back up when they are ready. This is not a by-pass, but a conscious choice. It takes practice and inner work to hold space for another whilst being in allowance of ourselves and staying awesome.
TIP: Having your partner’s back whilst holding fast to your own happy place and encouraging them up there with you is the way to go.
4. Don’t betray themselves to make others happy
How many times have you given up valuable parts of yourself to make your partner happy? How did that work out for you. Super conscious people detest this self-sacrificing, fallacy of love.
Although flexible, creative, solution oriented and loving, these folks know that compromising themselves, their time, choices and values for others happiness is an illusion and a trap which breeds resentment, lessens respect and ultimately destroys love.
TIP: Retaining our integrity and self-kindness allows us to be the happiest, most loving partner we are capable of being.
5. Form relationships based on powerful connection, not shared experiences
When with someone who is our vibrational equivalent we feel connected to them on all levels. It’s like the molecules around us are supporting that connection, providing a sense of communion with life itself that feels aligned and powerful.
When un-aware, we generally form connections from shared experiences or pain points. This is a draw card for unhealed stuff to play out, delivering a learning rather than loving experience.
We all chose a lot of learning experiences. I have had many. Although painful at the time, they delivered what I required to ultimately become more self-aware and thrive.
TIP: Understanding and exploring communion vs connection for you in all your relationships can be freeing and empowering.
6. Envision and contribute to the evolution a caring, conscious society that supports healthy relationships
In our fast paced survival oriented societies, unrealistic pressure is put on love relationships and there is frequently the expectation that one person will provide us with everything. This is unhealthy and unrealistic.
Self-aware people see a different possibility where everyone is empowered and people are loving and kind towards all. From that place, ‘romantic’ partnerships are less of a crutch and more of a choice. Being partnered up is less significant and connections are freer, more fluid and generative.
TIP: How can you contribute to everyone around to facilitate more awareness and light on the planet? What would this create in your world and your relationships?
“Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you.” – Walter Winchell
7. Understand the difference between ‘Holding a hand and chaining a soul’
Conscious maestros know that the purpose of a relationship is growth and expansion and if their partner outgrows them at any time, they would be delighted for the other person, rather than bummed out for themselves.
They are aware that their partner is a soul in a body having a human experience and that souls, bodies and beings are autonomous and don’t belong to anyone. This is true caring and love and flies in the face of all we’ve brought as real and true around relationship where expectations, rules and social norms apply.
TIP: What outdated and unhelpful relationship patterns and beliefs are you still playing out that are limiting you and your partner’s expansion? How can you change these starting now?