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7 Relationship-Building Tips from NY Times Bestselling Author Keith Ferrazzi

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Keith Ferrazzi

I recently had the pleasure of connecting with best selling author, entrepreneur, and speaker Keith Ferrazzi, one of the pre-eminent thought leaders and experts when it comes to professional relationship-building.

For those of you who don’t know Keith, he is the New York Times bestselling author of the modern-day classic Never Eat Alone, as well as the author of the bestselling book Who’s Got Your Back?, former CMO of Deloitte (where he was the youngest CMO of a Fortune 500 company), and former CMO of Starwood Hotels before he eventually broke out on his own to start Ferrazzi Greenlight.

These days, he’s helping some of the top companies around the world achieve hard results by teaching soft skills such as relationship building, change management, and supportive coaching, and he’s also making waves with his brand new book, Never Eat Alone: Expanded and Updated, which is available and brand-new as of this week!

Using lessons he’s shared with over half a million readers of the original version of Never Eat Alone, combined with the new insights he’s included in the expanded and updated version of the book, Keith has kindly shared with us 7 of his relationship-building tips that you can use to advance your career on and offline right now.

 

1) Be The King (Or Queen) Of Content

Those who are super-connectors in their professional and personal lives seek to provide value to others. Whether it’s through sharing lots of relevant industry content and being a learning resource to many like James Altucher, Gary Vaynerchuck, and other successful people have become, or it’s through transparency with your “trade-secrets” that have helped you achieve certain accolades to date, showing your humanity and being of service will result in more meaningful connections for you and your business.

 

2) Learn To Love The Fringe

In today’s day and age, connections you make online via social media are inherently less “close” than ones you make in-person. However, if managed and utilized properly, this can be a blessing in disguise, as a large, distant network can become an extremely value source of information and opportunities that wouldn’t have been as easily available even just a decade ago.

 

3) Join Conversations Before You Start Them

Good connectors know when it is valuable to listen and show genuine interest in other people rather than talk and expect others to go out of their way to hear them.

Don’t always jockey for attention, expecting everyone else to flock to you in order to discuss what’s on your mind; instead, join in the discussions others are having on and offline and show sincerity in their concerns and needs while contemplating how you can share knowledge or value in helping them.

 

Stage of my career keith quote

 

4) Don’t Keep Score

If you want to build real connections, it’s never just about getting what you want. It’s about making sure you selflessly provide value to others so they achieve in what they aspire to do as well. There shouldn’t be a “favor trade”, and help shouldn’t be a bargaining chip. Helping others – without keeping score – should be something you want to do in order to make the people around you better and be of service, and as a byproduct, others will naturally be more inclined to help you in the future after you’ve helped them.

 

5) “Ping” Constantly

Always be reaching out to your network in small, casual, and friendly ways. Whether it’s through sharing a funny meme, an inspirational quote, or inviting someone to join a dinner party (or a workout, meet-up, etc.), constantly reaching out to your network will strengthen bonds you have already while keeping you top of mind with others so that, when an opportunity or potential introduction arises, they automatically think of including you in some way.

If you wait until you need something before getting back in touch, you’re in for a rude awakening.

 

6) The Best Online Filter Is Offline

The strongest social network relationships begin (or grow) with a face-to-face meeting.

The best connectors get out of their desk chairs and actually go out and meet people in the real world. Only then do they send the friend request or boost their online engagement with that person.

 

7) Never Eat Alone

I feel obliged to end with this tip from Keith given that it’s the name of his books, but it is also probably the most important one. Just like feeding yourself food, you need to feed your relationships by always keeping them top of mind and working daily to improve them. Making and cultivating relationships your connections can’t be something you only do when you manage to find a little free time. More than ever, it needs to be your #1 priority if you want to distance yourself from the crowd and get ahead in life.

Many, many thanks to Keith Ferrazzi for being kind enough to share these tips with us, and check out his new book, Never Eat Alone, Expanded and Updated: And Other Secrets to Success, One Relationship at a Time, out this week!

 

Keith Ferrazzi Quote - Networking Building Relationships

 

Feature Image By: Techonomy Detroit

Jared Kleinert is an entrepreneur, TED and keynote speaker, and award-winning author who’s been named USA Today's "Most Connected Millennial" after spending years identifying and connecting hundreds of the world's smartest and most talented Millennials. His next book 3 Billion Under 30 is out now, and you can get 5 free stories from his new book atwww.3billionunder30.com. You can also say hi at jared@3billionunder30.com.

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Being a powerful communicator is important for several reasons, including building and maintaining relationships, achieving goals, resolving conflicts, improving productivity, leading and influencing others, advancing in your career, expressing yourself more confidently and authentically, and improving your mental and emotional well-being. Effective communication is an essential life skill that can benefit you in all aspects of your life.

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2. Use “I” statements: Speak from your own perspective and avoid placing blame or making accusations.

 

3. Avoid assumptions: Don’t make assumptions about what the other person is thinking or feeling.

 

4. Be clear: Express your thoughts and feelings clearly and concisely by getting to the point and avoid using jargon or overly complex language.

 

5. Show empathy: Show that you understand and care about the other person’s feelings.

 

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7. Be an active listener: Listen attentively and respond accordingly, incorporating your points into the conversation.

 

8. Choose the right time: Pick the most opportune time to speak to ensure that you have the group’s attention and can deliver your message without interruption.

 

9. Be the unifying voice: Step in and unify the group’s thoughts to calm down the discussion and insert your point effectively.

 

10. Keep responses concise: Keep responses short and to the point to show respect for others’ time.

 

11. Avoid unnecessary comments: Avoid commenting on everything and only speak when you have something important to say.

 

12. Cut the fluff: Avoid being long-winded and get straight to the point.

 

13. Prepare ahead of time: Sort out your points and practice them before speaking in a group.

 

14. Smile and be positive: Smile and nod along as others speak, to build a positive relationship and be respected when it’s your turn to speak.

 

15. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your own actions and feelings.

 

16. Ask questions: Ask questions to clarify any confusion or misunderstandings.

 

17. Avoid interrupting: Allow the other person to finish speaking without interruption.

 

18. Practice active listening: Repeat what the other person said to ensure you have understood correctly.

 

19. Use your body language too: Use nonverbal cues such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language to convey your message and build rapport.

 

20. Be aware of the tone of your voice: it should be calm and assertive, not aggressive or passive.

 

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