Gaby& Raj have been a couple for a decade AND together nearly 24-7, they run two businesses together and STILL enjoy a playful, peaceful, passionate relationship. And they want YOU to as well!
Their message and methods are fun, even funny and totally forward focused. No need to be so significant and serious or to dissect problems anymore.
Gaby helps turn impossible dreams into awesome realities. Her favorite expression is “Pigs CAN fly!” Raj’s thirst for meaningful knowledge has him known as the “Energizer Bunny of transformation”. His motto is “Let’s do this!”
Together with over 40 combined years of education, training and experience, they help couples “Keep the fights clean and the sex dirty” and learn how to “Save being nasty for your sex life!”
In our podcast interview and this article, together we explore the impact our business has on our relationship and our relationship on our business along with the top 5 tips for entrepreneurs in relationship.
1. Choose Wisely!
As a business person, you make all sorts of important decisions, still there is NO more important decision you can make in your life that who you choose as your partner in life and love.
If your relationship sucks, your life pretty much sucks. Relationships can fuel your performance in a positive way or can distract you, slow you down or even totally derail you.
Are they going to be a weight around your neck or the wind in your sail?
Yes life is too tough to do alone, yet a crappy relationship is worse than none at all and a wonderful one is so worth it. So choose wisely!
2. Your Relationship Is Like Your Business – Invest in It!
The most common threat to a relationship is the Autopilot Attitude. Just like your business, your relationship TAKES SOMETHING!
What did you think an awesome relationship just happens? No!
Invest in intimacy. Invest your attention…before it is demanded of you (often at the worst time possible). Just a little intention, attention and action can go a VERY long way towards a playful, peaceful, passionate relationship.
Bonus: Get creative, lighten up and turn that “relationship work” into “relationship fun”. As Gaby likes to say when she wants to up-level intimacy…“I know… let’s play a Game!”
3. Arguments Are An Access to Next Level Loving & Living – “The Problem is the Path”
Stop resisting and avoiding the differences and conflict. Lean in, embrace it and learn all you can from it. There are valuable lessons available itching to be heard and healed. In fact, the very thing that is pulling you apart can be there very thing that brings you together.
If you chose well, your beloved’s perspective is VALUABLE and they want your happiness and success. Their concerns could be a golden finger of loving and wise wisdom pointing towards an “Even Better If” future.
And often enough, that lesson your relationship has to teach you is exactly what you needed to learn and transform to take your business to the next level.
Most couples just want to get through the day let alone a fight. But don’t just settle to just get through it and move on, move FORWARD by leaning in for the lessons. “Experience can be expensive. Just make sure you get what you paid for.”
4. Know Thyself and Your Beloved – Create a Me Manual
Knowing your patterns around feelings, behaviors, preferences and resets is a HUGELY helpful life hack that can save you TONS of stress, headaches and even a broken heart. Taking a few personality assessments online can be eye opening, even life changing and certainly helpful in navigating a romantic relationship.
Take it a step further and get to know your beloved in the same way. Invite them to take the assessments or to just share what works best or doesn’t work at all for them.
Then together, co-create practices and habits to avoid, diminish and even heal the triggers.
This will set you up to save your relationship from all the drain and drama of the repeat or ugly fights that take forever to heal from. Who has time for that?!
Bonus: Create a “Me Manual” electronically and print it to have a hard copy accessible. Learn the Dos & Don’ts that work best with your type and have it ready to reference when in conflict. Then share your “Me Manual” with your beloved and create some “Games” to play to embrace both your types and the special interaction between them. (Check out the podcast for specific assessments)
5. Even Better If It!
Many couples resist conflict and do not embrace the influence of their beloved.
A powerful paradox to practice holding is “All Is Well”, everything IS great as it is AND at the same time we are all always learning and can “Even Better If” our experience.
After a fight, ask yourself and each other – How was that? How did we do and how could we do better next time? (For 5 fantastic questions to ask after a fight, listen to the podcast).
After some sexy-time, ask yourself and each other – How was that? How did we do and how could we do better next time? (For the 3 super satisfying criteria to “score” your experience and up-level the erotic intimacy listed to the podcast.)
Hold the attitude that everything is just as it should be now AND that you can always make it better for the future and you will continue to grow as individuals and as a couple.
In case this is useful anywhere – here is the summary of the show – looks like you include just the bio and no reference to what the podcast is about.
Summary by Time
2:30 It takes some time and energy – you reap what you sow. Invest in intimacy – invest rather than demanded.
4:00 Arguments as Access – lean in, not away
5:30 You CAN get the manual! Personality assessments (apply biz practices to relationship and vice versa). Also resets.
7:20 Get curious about your partner.
7:30 Relationship Hacks – Non linear jumps
8:00 Love languages
9:00 Specific examples for what personality assessments to take.
10:45 Another personality assessment – Personality Hacker
11:00 Most common problems – autopilot attitude
12:25 Stop Resisting/Lean In – The Problem is the Path – The Conflict is your teacher
13:00 Get pro-active- aim for what you want.
14:30 Book recommendation: The obstacle is the way
15:20 Don’t just move on, move FORWARD – breakdown => breakthrough. What turns you apart can actually pull you together
16:00 Relationships can fuel your performance in a positive way
18:15 Date an entrepreneur, work together or be with a “9-5er”? Approaches to each.
20:00 working together tips – stay in your lane
20:15 Dating a “9-5er” – embrace the problems as access to even better if. Asset or liability? Weight around your neck or wind in your sail?
23:15 Assessment: Strengths Finder – understand your partner
24:30 Your relationship is like a business – embrace the differences, self awareness, learning about ourselves and others.
26:00 Choose Wisely! (But it might look messy at first! Don’t give up too early.)
26:50 Relationship helps you transform the very things that you need to excel in your business. Directly translated my ability to be a calm effective holder of space…Managing anger, lack of ability to communicate your needs – they came out in a biz setting.
31:00 How to not fight about driving ever again!
34:00 Name your arguements -can’t get a word in edge wise
34:30 Making Marriage simple Drama Free Diet Biggest issue in relationship negativity – blaming shaming complaining critizing. Magic ratio – 5to 1 ration positive to negative. Make a game out of it. Blamey Shamey Complainy.
37:20 All is well + Even Better If
38:30 Romp Recap – Intimacy, Sexiness & Technique
39:30 – Argument Even Better Ifing – how often does it happen? How bad/extreme did it get? (And lines crossed?), How long did it last? Did we use our tools? Did we learn any lessons? (What can we take to the next one).
41:00 Find out more at: relationshipfunandgames.com/success
gift of our ebook – easy to scan dozens of tips by topic. 8 categories FCSD Before as it starts during and after.
43:00 Last message – Gaby – The problem is the path – life is too tough to do alone, yet a crappy relationship is worth than embrace the problem. Love is worth it.
A great relationship is like everything else in life – it takes something – it is not magically going to happen. Embrace your relationship will take something to be great – wonderful relationship is so worth it.
8 Powerful Ways To Show Up In Dating & Relationships – Apollonia Ponti
If you are struggling to create clarity in your life then I have created the Addicted2Success academy to support you in getting crystal clear on your next moves in life. Join my mentorship in The Addicted2Success Academy here. The only PROVEN METHOD in the world that allows ANYONE to effortlessly ELEVATE the 8-KEY AREAS of life, is finally being passed down… EXCLUSIVELY, in this Academy.
Apollonia Ponti is a Dating & Relationship Coach for men. She specializes in teaching men to understand what women want, master their attraction skills, and build their confidence in dating or a relationship.
In this Addicted2Success Podcast episode Apollonia shares how you can show up powerfully in Dating and Relationships.
Here is the audio of the podcast:
Mindset #1 You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone
You have clarity in your life about who you are as a person and if you are not going to be desired as a man by a particular person, then you know there is someone else that will desire you. Now I’m not saying that you’re going to be disrespectful and come off harsh and really, really aggressive, but what I do mean is that you just hold your power. You know who you are and you don’t have to prove yourself or you don’t have to say things to get people to like you.
You don’t have to act in a particular way for someone to like you. You know that you showing up as you will be the way people will see you and if they don’t like you, no big deal. You like you and that’s what matters.
Mindset #2 You’re not attached to an outcome, you know that everything will work out, and if it doesn’t, you will be okay
If you go a little bit deeper in this, this means that you’re okay with being alone, right? This means that you, alone, are okay because a lot of times in relationships a lot of people seek validation from another. They seek validation that they are loved, that they are enough but you’re the only person that needs to see yourself as enough to attract that. That’s what I’m saying. Mindset number two is not attached to a specific outcome.
If you like a girl and she’s an amazing girl and you think this is going great blah blah blah, you’re okay if it works out and you’re okay if it doesn’t work out. It’s just the simple act of you not putting pressure because if you put pressure it shows neediness, insecurity, and attachment.
Mindset #3 You look at things as what value can I offer someone or something instead of what can I get out of this because you have a mindset that you know the more that I give the more that I’m going to receive
Now it’s not that you’re saying that you’re going to give someone a piece of you or your time if they’re not going to be respectful or receiving towards it, but you know that you don’t have this attitude that you’re just like, “Okay, what are you giving me? I’m here because you need to be here and you’re giving me something because my time is valuable to me.” No.
Your time is valuable to you, yes, but this is from a different perspective and mindset. You’re like, “Okay, how can I add value to you in your life?” Because you know you’re capable of meeting your own needs and being there for others. It’s less selfish. This comes off so attractive to women and it shows too that you are powerful and that you hold your own pretty well.
Mindset #4 You’re unapologetically honest
I don’t mean that you’re just going to point out and say things like you look fat in that dress or anything like that but you’re going to obviously be honest and open about your own opinions. Women are so attracted to this and I talk about this so much because I just want to get it ingrained in your head. You don’t want to always agree with a woman because one, you’ll fall into friend zone pretty easily when that happens, and two, women test men a lot when it comes to this.
When you’re open and you’re honest about how you feel or have your own opinion about a specific topic that the both of you are talking about, it shows that you are just you showing up for you and not trying to impress her because you are enough and that’s what is impressive to a woman.
Mindset #5 You value your time so this means you also want to see if she’s worth it
There is a difference here. What I mean in value your time is you take your time with her to see if she is worth it for you. A lot of times men fall into just the visual of the woman. Like oh my gosh, she has a nice body, she’s beautiful, she’s this, she’s that, which I’m not saying to dismiss, but what I am saying is understand that those women can be a little bit more intriguing to you when you’re really trying to get to know her on an emotional level, what she has to offer you and who she is as a person if she’s worth a commitment as well.
Instead of just seeing her beauty and thinking, “This one!” This is the mindset you want to always have: no matter how beautiful the woman is or how great the woman is, you have to see if she’s worth it for you to invest your time in and the same goes vice versa. A woman of value is deciding the same thing; are you the type of person she wants to make a commitment to as well.
Mindset #6 You show up powerfully in your own skin
What I mean by this is you just know yourself. I mean I talk about this in mindset number one and mindset number two, but when you show up in your own skin, you walk into places like a lounge or a restaurant or wherever you are, and your chin is up, shoulders are back, and you just confidently know who you are. Women can sense this when a man just knows who he is and he owns it and he’s just powerful in who he is. It shows in how you present yourself.
How do you become powerful? Well, you have to be focused on something that is thriving in your life and you can read my article on how to find your purpose to discover some ideas on how to find your purpose and how you give back. This is significant to your everyday world when it comes to attraction.
Mindset #7 You’re compassionate but you don’t get defensive
There are so many men that I know that get very low on patience. They take automatic offense to something as though if a woman says something she’s being disrespectful and he points fingers back and he automatically gets offended as though he has to defend himself and the world is all against him. This is not compassion. What this actually does to a woman in her mind is it kills attraction all the time. I mean from day one. It’s a huge red flag for a woman. I bring this up because this has happened a lot in coaching sessions and men that I’ve talked to, they’re just like, “I just don’t have patience. I just don’t have the time, blah blah blah blah blah,” but they hold this aspect of not having compassion but also not knowing how to just breathe, take a moment and be like, “All right.
This has nothing to do with me. What’s the worst thing possible that can come out of this? Let me just open this up for discussion,” instead of just pointing fingers and getting so frustrated to the point where you can hear it in their tone. You can see it in their physical being and you can hear the way that they come off and their expressions. Everything changes, their demeanor, their energy, everything.
This is huge in regards to the mindset of a man. You don’t want to let anybody else control your emotions. You are the one that’s in control of your own emotions, right? Meaning, okay someone says something to you to piss you off. You have a choice! You have a choice to either get angry or just look at him and smile and be like, “Damn. You’re having a bad day.” Right? Because of the fact that when you hold your own, it shows so much more confidence that you’re just not reacting and you’re just accepting it and you’re just like, “You’re not going to get to me,” because you control yourself. You control you.
Reacting and taking everything personally can kill attraction instantly. It comes off as unsafe. And that is huge for women, they need to know they can be safe with you. It is your choice in how you choose to respond to the things around you.
Mindset #8 You embrace failures with strength and confidence
We all mistakes in life but you embrace these mistakes and ask yourself how can I be better, what can I learn from this and what would I choose to improve. Let me respond to my mistakes and see how I can fix this so it doesn’t happen again. You don’t get down on yourself and start punishing yourself like, “Oh, you’re not a good guy, you’re horrible, no woman is going to like you. You don’t deserve love.” You don’t say those things to yourself.
When you’re in the dumps you’re like, “Okay fine. I messed up but how am I going to improve with this and how am I going to move forward?” You take the proactive notions and you build the skills so you don’t have this happen to you again.
The Mindset Of A Multiple 7 Figure Entrepreneur – Michael Michalowicz
On this week’s Addicted2Success podcast we have Michael Michalowicz who is an American author, entrepreneur, and lecturer.
He is the author of five business books including Fix This Next, Clockwork, Profit First Revised & Expanded, Surge, Profit First – The Pumpkin Plan and The Toilet Paper Entrepreneur, is an advocate of a business philosophy by the same name, and is a former small business columnist for The Wall Street Journal.
Michael is the “Business Rescue” segment host for MSNBC’s Your Business.
He also hosted the reality television program called Bailout!
Listen to this powerful episode with Michael here and get ready to take notes:
Top 12 Addicted2Success Podcast Episodes for You to Listen To
We are almost 6 months into the year and there has been so many great articles, videos and podcast episodes featured on Addicted2Success.
The Addicted2Success podcast is one of the most popular podcasts in the business section of the apple podcast store and we are officially live on Spotify, Stitcher and SoundCloud now so you can’t miss a motivational beat.
Here are the Top 12 Addicted2Success podcast episodes of 2019 for you to listen to
If you feel that any of the below podcasts have inspired you in any way shape or form please share the episodes on your insta stories, facebook, emails or direct message them to your friends as this would be deeply appreciated as we are on a mission to spread powerful self development advice to the world.
1. Dr. Dain Heer – How To Be More Conscious With Your Thoughts, Feelings And Emotions
Dr. Dain Heer is an internationally renowned author, speaker and facilitator of consciousness and change. For over 17 years, he has been inviting people to embrace their true greatness—people from every culture, country, age and social strata of society.
Originally trained as a chiropractor, he has a completely different approach to healing by facilitating people to tap into and recognize their own abilities and knowing.
2. Ashley Hann – 4 Ways To Master Magnetic Confidence
Ashley Hannawacker is an online branding and marketing strategist, author and speaker. Ashley specializes in creating powerful, cohesive online brand experiences and is an expert at making websites that make money.
Ashley is very passionate about personal growth and mindset through which she has led various presentations, coached leadership trainings and written a #1 best selling book: Magnetic Confidence: Attract the Results, Relationships and Life You Want.
3. Jason Stone – The 3 Principles To Building A 6 & 7 Figure Online Business
Jason Stone is widely known by celebrities and almost 2 million people around the world as @Millionaire_Mentor on Instagram. Stone has successfully launched multiple 6 and 7 figure Instagram and Internet platforms and is becoming a well known social media influencer and marketer. Known for his e-commerce success in the automotive industry in his early years with Treadstone Performance Engineering.
4. Les Brown – How To Achieve The Ultimate Level Of Self Motivation
One of the greatest Motivational Speakers of All Time “Les Brown” shares his powerful wisdom on what it takes to face any fear and how to reach the ultimate level of Self Motivation.
Les Brown goes deep in this conversation, he pours his heart and soul into this and keeps this one real and raw. Don’t Miss This!
5. Tony Robbins – 5 Ways To Master Your Money And Impact Millions Of Lives
Advisor to Billionaire’s, Athletes, Celebrities and some of the top leaders in the world! Tony Robbins is the go to guy for Success strategies and Joel Brown had the fortunate opportunity to chat with Tony about achieving success in this half an hour exclusive interview on the Addicted2Success Podcast!
6. Jay Shetty – How To Be Remembered For Your Love & Contribution
Jay Shetty is a philosophical content creator, story teller, Forbes 30 under 30 entrepreneur and former monk who has created a brand and movement that has reached over 1 Billion views and is dedicated to Making Wisdom Go Viral.
7. T. Harv Eker – How Multi-Millionaire’s Think
T. Harv Eker, the Best Selling Author of Secrets of The Millionaire Mind shares his insights and unforgettable advice on creating a life with abundant wealth and success.
The strategies he shares will change the way you view money forever!
8. Peter Sage – How To Live Your Best Life
Peter Sage is a well known international & serial entrepreneur, author, philosopher and teacher. His unique way of looking at and relating to life has inspired tens of thousands of people worldwide to Reinvent themselves.
Whether by improving or turning around a business or developing a new and empowering psychology through practical yet profound shifts in awareness, Peter hopes his insights and teachings can offer something of value to those who seek it.
9. Yahya Bakkar – How To Powerfully Sell Your Story To The World
Yahya Bakkar is a powerhouse speaker and leadership coach.
Yahya has spoken on over 500 stages around the world and he believes in giving you motivational, practical & transformational content to help you become the most courageous, confident and charismatic version of yourself.
10. Ajit Nawalkha – 4 Powerful Mindset Shifts That Will Change Your Life Forever
Speaker, Coach and Author “Ajit Nawalkha” shares his powerful advice on how to create emotional and mental shifts within to achieve more as an entrepreneur so you can move closer to your dreams.
Ajit’s new book “Live Big” is out now. In Live Big: A Guide to Passion, Practicality, and Purpose, Nawalkha shares 25 shifts—changes in your mental, physical, emotional, or even spiritual state—that will propel you on your road to success.
11. Olivia Arezzolo – How To Master Your Sleep For More Success
Australian Sleep Specialist Olivia Arezzolo shares her powerful advice for achieving more success through better sleep. Olivia writes for some of the world’s top publications on the power of sleep routines and how to live a more empowered life with new and healthy habits.
12. Grant Cardone – How To Increase Your Hunger For Success
Grant Cardone shares his advice on what it takes to be obsessed with your success. Get your hands on Grant Cardone’s New Book “Be Obsessed or Be Average” now.
4 Ways YOU Can Create Powerful Habits – James Clear
Author and habits expert James Clear says if you want to make big changes, first you have to think small. His new book, “Atomic Habits,” zeroes in on the idea that small adjustments add up to larger changes over time.
What Are Habits?
Let’s define habits. Habits are the small decisions you make and actions you perform every day. According to researchers at Duke University, habits account for about 40 percent of our behaviors on any given day.
Your life today is essentially the sum of your habits. How in shape or out of shape you are? A result of your habits. How happy or unhappy you are? A result of your habits. How successful or unsuccessful you are? A result of your habits.
What you repeatedly do (i.e. what you spend time thinking about and doing each day) ultimately forms the person you are, the things you believe, and the personality that you portray. Everything I write about – from procrastination and productivity to strength and nutrition – starts with better habits. When you learn to transform your habits, you can transform your life.
Listen to the full podcast interview below to learn the ways that James Clear has Mastered his Habits!
As James Clear says:
Becoming better is not simply a matter of willpower or work ethic. It’s also a matter of strategy. What people assume is a lack of willpower or an unwillingness to change is often a consequence of trying to build good habits in bad environments.
- If you are trying to read more books, don’t do it in a room filled with video games, Netflix, and a television. Move to a less distracting environment.
- If you’re very overweight, don’t try to follow a workout program for college athletes. You can get there eventually, but that’s not a battle you need to fight right now. Start with a manageable change.
- If you’re surrounded by people who tear down your goals, then work on your projects in a different location or reach out to like-minded people.
- If you’re trying to stick to a writing habit when your kids are home from school and your house is in chaos, then work on it at a different time. Switch to a time of less resistance.
Build your habits where it is easy to do so. Re-define the situation. Create a game where the odds are stacked in your favor.
It sounds simple, but how often do you find yourself fighting difficult battles and ignoring easy ones? There is plenty of time to fight the difficult battles. Win the easy battles first.
The smartest path is to improvement is the one of least resistance. Fight battles you are destined to win.
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