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5 Simple Steps to Creating a Breakthrough in Your Life




Did you wake up today hoping that today will be the day for your breakthrough? Everyday we see breakthroughs happen.The latest technology crashing into the market, a new overnight success story starring in a Hollywood movie, a business IPO that makes the founders billions in just a few hours.

Often we see these breakthroughs and wonder to ourselves – “when will it be my turn?” We deserve success as much as those people. We are just as smart, or talented, or determined as those people making the headlines, so surely it is just a matter of time.

The problem with this view of the breakthrough process is that we do not see what happened BEFORE the breakthrough. Before the tech launch, there were hundreds of hours of coding, testing and fixing before version 1 was even launched. The breakout technology is already at version 13.1.

Before the Hollywood blockbuster, there were hundreds of auditions, rejections and hours spent in front of the mirror mastering facial expressions. The 90-minute blockbuster is only the tip of that artist’s work.

Before the IPO, there was hustling for sales, funding rejections and moments where the business almost failed. The stock price doesn’t show the blood and sweat that the entire company invested to get to that point.

The reality is there are 5 steps that lead to every breakthrough. If you are waiting for your breakthrough to happen, you need to see where you are on this path.

1. Decide To Be In The Game

First off, you need to make a commitment to get started. Observing everything from the outside and commenting on how you would do it is never going to lead to your breakthrough. You need to have skin in the game. You can’t influence anything if you are only sitting on the bench. This first step is scary as you have to overcome a whole load of fear.

Also, there is no risk associated with being a critic. Theodore Roosevelt said in ‘Man In The Arena’ that critics are “those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat”. Instead, you know that to breakthrough, you have to leave that old mindset behind, get in the game and open yourself up to success.

“I wonder how many times people give up just before a breakthrough – when they are on the very brink of success.” – Joyce Meyer

2. Get Started

Start small rather than quitting your job and stating something full time. Think about developing a side hustle first, and growing that to the point that it can replace your salary. Ben & Jerry’s started with a $5 correspondence course in ice cream technology. Vivien Westwood invented the mini skirt but started her fashion career selling homemade jewellery at a market stall on Portobello Road on weekends. Check out books like Side Hustle by Chris Guillebeau or 4 Hour Work Week by Tim Ferriss for ideas on how to get started.

3. Get Better Every Day

Once you have begun your journey, you will find yourself surrounded by competitors and collaborators and a natural tendency will be to compare yourself with them. The problem with that is everyone is moving at different speeds and at different points in their journey. It can be easy to become deflated if you compare yourself to people much further ahead of you.

Likewise, you can get complacent if you look how much further you have come than people who have just started. Instead, focus on how you can improve yourself each day. The Law of Marginal Gains proves that lots of small improvements eventually turn into huge progress, so try and improve a specific area by 1% every day and see how quickly that all adds up.

4. Network & Connect

Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak were introduced by a mutual contact. Harrison Ford got a huge break talking about his desire to be an actor when building cabinets for George Lucas. We don’t always know where the contacts we make when networking will take us, but without a strong network and group of contacts, your reach will always be limited.

When networking, think about specific groups of people you want to connect with. The cast of the original Ghostbusters movie all met doing Saturday Night Live. Ask yourself “what is the SNL of my industry?” and then find a way to get into that group of people.

“The richest people in the world look for and build networks, everyone else looks for work.” – Robert Kiyosaki

5. Teamwork

Players & Coaches Like Michael Jordan said, “talent wins games but teamwork wins championships”. The journey to success can be a long one, and we will need people around us to get all the way. Sometimes we need people to extend our bandwidth of what we can produce. Sometimes we need words of encouragement or someone to bounce ideas around with. Make sure you surround yourself with a team and coaches that will help you play at the level you deserve to be competing at.

So there you have it, these are the 5 steps to creating a breakthrough. There is no telling how long it will take for your breakthrough to arrive, so find a way to enjoy the journey. Ray Croc started McDonalds when he was 53. Vera Wang didn’t make wedding dresses until she was 39. Alan Rickman didn’t get a movie role until he was 28.

Take some small steps immediately after finishing this article. Commit to yourself today to take control of the breakthrough process, rather than waiting for it to happen to you. One day, and before too long, when you wake hoping that today will be the day for your breakthrough… it will be.

How do you create a breakthrough? Comment below!

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I am Dan Storey from UK .I have worked in and around the world of Motivational seminars for many years, starting as a volunteer and affiliate before heading up one of the UK’s biggest personal development seminar companies. I have been training NLP to business and sales people for over 10 years and the author of next level persuasion. I am currently Working towards MSC in Behavioural Psychology and constantly trying to figure out why we do what we do.

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The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.



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Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

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How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.



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It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

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Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.



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People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma



Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.


Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:


1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.


2. Persistent Pain

Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.

4. A strong need for control

It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
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